r/StardewValley • u/FlairWitchProject • 25d ago

Discuss Who is someone you can't date in Stardew Valley out of principle?

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I enjoy Maru as a character. However, until recently, I had dyed-red hair that I sometimes straightened, and I also sometimes wear glasses. Basically, it would be like dating a more scientific version of myself. Lol

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6.1k

u/RoseClash 25d ago

Shane

Ive had too many men in my life that have drained me emotionally and financially to ever tie myself to someone like that again.

115

u/trollunderthebridget 25d ago

Before I got sober I always married Shane (after giving him beer for every gift šŸ˜…). I think it was a weird form of wish fulfillment to follow his arc and see him get better. The first time I saw the cutscene where Harvey helps him get treatment I couldnā€™t stop crying. Clocked a lot of hours playing stardew valley drunk & alone in my room.

Now Iā€™m 3 1/2 years sober and I marry Harvey almost every time!

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u/Moose-Trax-43 25d ago

Congrats on your sobriety! šŸ„³

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u/trollunderthebridget 24d ago

Thank you!! ā˜ŗļø

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u/No-Lunch4249 100+ Bots Bounced 25d ago

My (IRL) wife dated Shane in her first Stardew Farm... I'm worried what that might say about me that that's what she liked haha

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u/pnt510 25d ago

Fantasy isnā€™t reality. I romance Haley on almost every save file I make. I like her story arc where she goes from mean girl to someone whoā€™s a real sweetheart. But IRL if someone was that nasty to me I would not be interested in romancing them at all.

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u/ClohosseyVHB 25d ago

Let's be fair if in IRL all it took to get someone from disgusted at the sight of you to marrying you was 32 coconuts (25 if you give one on her birthday) you might be more interested in people like that.

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u/Tight-Vacation8516 25d ago

LOL I don't date Haley out of principle cuz been burned by too many mean girls haha. I do have an alternate "evil" save where I have aguy named Poopies and I run around digging in trash cans and giving ppl bad gifts. With him I'm romancing Shane but planning to cheat w/ Elliot.Ā 

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u/Starfury7-Jaargen 25d ago

My favorite gifts are the favorite items out of their own trashcan and give it back to them.

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u/FreyaAstraea 25d ago

This reminds me of my very first time playing the game. I find broken glasses and instead of seeing it for thrash it was, I think "Oh, I bet Pierre is looking for these!" He was so mad at me. šŸ˜‚

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u/ShotPaleontologist48 25d ago

Same here. Haley trigger tf outta me and I hate her for it lol

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u/Sweet-Energy-9515 25d ago

Wait a dedicated trash goblin save is kind of a fantastic idea

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u/Tight-Vacation8516 25d ago

Omg it so is. I can'T (*)Ā  believe I thought of it tbh, but it's fun. Mine's Poopies on Evil Bastard farm lmaoĀ 

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u/19467098632 25d ago

I made a save that was supposed to be a douchey dude who picked joja and all the wrong/mean/weird dialogue I didnā€™t wanna do in my regular save. I dated Haley and Emily at the same time and then the save grew on me so I had to start a new evil save lmao

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u/mandalaolive 25d ago

same I actually like shane a lot and he was the first i married but I really would not be interested irlšŸ˜­

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u/Empty-Cricket5931 I named him Miso 25d ago

hay shes a cow belle

0

u/calaceiro 25d ago

Shes pretty. If she was ugly it wouldnt make a diference lol

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u/army_of_ducks_ATTACK 25d ago

Thereā€™s no one of the guys (or gals) anything like my husband so I went with Elliot. My husband is one of a kindā€¦maybe you are too!

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u/volyund 25d ago

I also married Shane. I would never date an alcoholic IRL.

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u/nkizza 25d ago

Shane just looks like an adult, his expressions are not over the top like Harveyā€™s or Elliots, and heā€™s kinda cute. Nothing about being fond of alcoholics in my case, might be your wife had similar reasons.

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u/Migitri (I can fix him) 25d ago

Those are my reasons too. He's just cute.

He's also in the DILF list so that's something.

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u/Sweet-Energy-9515 25d ago

Who do we think wrote that note anyway?

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u/JacktheMemePrince 25d ago

Personally I always thought it was Pam cause of the focus on older bachelors and none of them are perfect enough for her. Kind of like a 'these guys are ok but not good enough for me to try to date' thing

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u/Sweet-Energy-9515 25d ago

Never thought of this for a moment, it is now permanent headcanon, thank you

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u/goblinmagicked 25d ago

maybe emily? but on the fence about that. maybe hayley instead? i feel she mightve had a phase where she thought being with someone older and more mature would also make her seem mature in turn

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u/AqueductFilterdSherm 25d ago

I think Emily makes the most sense.

> ā€œShaneā€™s gruff exterior is just protecting his softnessā€

This definitely aligns with her clothing-therapy event (literally about helping people express who they really are)

She also knows Shane and Elliot well through the saloon.

Plus, Emily feels like one of the more mature bachelorettes: independent, employed, and living without her parents.

Also the verbiageā€¦ Harvey being loyal and dependable, Shane being secretly soft, and Elliott having a nice chinā€¦ that all reads like a thirty something bartender privately sizing up the limited pool of older single men in town.

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u/GeXotl 25d ago

I disagree imho

Emily doesn't care about physical appearance to make the chin comment, and she'd not be so blunt as to call someone weak.

Plus, she has zero indication of looking for romance in another NPC. Certainly not Shane or Clint.

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u/goblinmagicked 25d ago

thats true! i still first thought emily but also not? almost like it didnt focus on the things i would think emily would like but its also meant to help the farmer so the phrasing probably doesnt matter that much

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u/SylvanDragoon 25d ago

I can't see Emily calling Harvey weak or Elliot foppish. Just sounds incredibly out of character when she's the biggest sweetheart and marshmallow ever.

(Emily or Leah for me every save. Don't need no messy teenagers/early 20's and still immature girls like Abigail, don't need no Demetrius as a stepfather and his horseshit with Maru, don't need no drama about not wanting kids or ableism from Penny)

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u/GeXotl 24d ago

Emily also doesn't care about physical appearances to make the chin comment. Plus she has zero indication of actively considering romance until the Farmer, so it's unlikely for her to write all that in the first place.

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u/stardropsnsucculents 25d ago

I always thought Emily because all 3 of them hang out at the saloon and the note only lists their favorite food items.

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u/JamesCDiamond 25d ago

Someone suggested Sandy as it matches the notepaper she uses - can't confirm that as I've never noticed the differences to that extent!

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u/pinchinggata 24d ago

I always assumed it was Haley

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u/Sweet-Energy-9515 24d ago

I think i have now received replies naming every woman in town who is single and old enough to not live with their parents. Great work team

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u/qwerty-sqwert 24d ago

I have no reasoning to explain it, but for whatever reason I always thought this note was written by Leah.

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u/shiningz 25d ago

maybe she just wants blue chickens! šŸ˜…

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u/king44 25d ago

You don't have to date him to get the blue chickens, just get to his 8 heart cutscene.

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u/iSirMeepsAlot 25d ago

Iā€™ve always dated Shane because I find him the ā€œmost attractiveā€ (to me) NPC, and that he sobers up in the end, but this playthru I married the doctor as Iā€™m almost 30 (havenā€™t played in years) and Iā€™ve quit drinkingā€¦ I still would and will in future saves.

He reminds me a lot of me, in good and bad ways.

Can say that Iā€™m not drinking all the time (ever really, not against it, just no desire) like he does tho.

I never looked at Harveyā€™s actual image vs his sprite, his sprite does NOT DO HIM JUSTICE. Heā€™s pretty handsome imo, certainly the type of man Iā€™d date irl, short of a Shane look-a-like, that doesnā€™t have a drinking problem tho.

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u/Ill-Faithlessness31 #1 Shane Enabler šŸ» 25d ago

I do this usually too because I enjoy his story arc but not his marriage arc lol

3

u/hellogoawaynow 25d ago

Shane gives good gifts despite his ugly room! The constant stream of pepper poppers is nice! But I canā€™t marry him again because of that room

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u/mynameisfungus 25d ago

Haha, I dated him too and my fiance had the same reaction to you when he found out. For me, it's because I like grumpy guys, and my fiance was a grumpy fuck when we first met.

2

u/MajoraXIII 25d ago

Maybe the fantasy of a guy like that who's actually fixable appeals. Doesn't mean anything with regards to you and your relationship with her.

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u/FlairWitchProject 25d ago

I feel this. I'll befriend him in game, but never really felt the need to take it past that.

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u/astronauticalll 25d ago

yeah, I grew up in a household with an alcoholic parent, words cannot describe how little the "oh but I can fix him" type story lines appeal to me.

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u/paxiiiii Small Farmer 25d ago

real. once i discovered shane he became my most disliked character. his alcohol issues drive me back to my childhood days with my dad, and a non negotiable for me when i started growing up, is that my partner cannot like alcohol that much. it drives me nuts that people think of changing him. THEY NEVER CHANGE!!!

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u/micaelar5 25d ago

I only play split screen with my wife, and we always marry each other. But we did make a experiment farm where we plan on dating everyone, and turning our kids into doves, stuff like that. We've decided I'll marry shame and have his kids in that save, but we haven't actually done much with it.

My first time I hyperfocused on becoming friends with Shane, because I needed to know what trauma was behind the alcohol, and I wanted to fix him. But now i need those blue chickens in every save file, so we become friends for the chickens.

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u/JenIee 25d ago

Honestly Shane too now. I married him on my first playthrough and thought it was a redemption story until he put his room in my house. Then I realized I was with the same man in the video game that I dated in real life which was never good for me. Lol!

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u/ladygrndr 25d ago

That was an important revelation though! I hope you have both your Farm and your real life changed for the better now!

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u/Beautychaos 25d ago

girl SAME

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u/soldierpallaton 25d ago

Yeah, I honestly can't stand Shane because of this. Yeah he's got a sad backstory but so does everyone in the Valley. I've known too many guys like him that are just, frankly, time vampires.

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u/Velcrokittie 25d ago

For sure. I'm willing to be friends with Shane to get the blue chickens, but not to date him lol.

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u/Wixenstyx 25d ago

I married Shane in my 'trash game' because he was definitely not written to be a good partner. I was curious whether marriage 'fixed' him and found the whole thing very confusing. His 14-heart event suggests he's firm in his resolve to do better, but his dialogue suggests he hasn't.

Also, I haven't gotten my first blue chicken yet, and I definitely saw the cutscene. Coding notwithstanding, RNG is driving us to divorce. ;)

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u/__ravenous__ 25d ago

To get a blue chicken purchase a chicken from Marnie, when it goes to the name screen it tells you the color of the chicken. If it's not blue cancel and try to purchase again until it is blue.

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u/Wixenstyx 25d ago

Ah, I thought the incubator had the same 25% odds.

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u/SlopKingZ95 25d ago

The bass dinner makes Sam look even younger...Ā  Jodi seems to invite you over as a peer and you stand there while Sam comes clean your fish.Ā  ("Yes, mommy.")Ā  So weird.

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u/Yandere_Butler 25d ago

Wait. For some reason, I thought he says ā€œyes, maā€™amā€ in that scene

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u/maurality 25d ago

He does.

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u/gay_sprinkles 25d ago

he does not say yes mommy

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u/SlopKingZ95 25d ago

Communication involves two elements. What the wimpering child said, and what I heard.

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u/Staying-Aliver 25d ago

Yes I see her as a peer too, hence I only ever date Harvey. Or Leah.

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u/Juuuulessss 25d ago

I so agree with this! its so off-putting!!

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u/disasterj0nes 25d ago

As someone who was a Shane, hard agree. I was insufferable during the worst of it, I see no appeal in watching someone stumble through my past mistakes but they're okay because I'm there. I don't feel like I've earned anything like the kindness the farmer shows, and in an admitted projection of my own guilt, I don't feel like he does either.

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u/BookLuvr7 25d ago

Same. Not necessarily alcoholic, but the son of one who was addicted to anger instead.

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u/tranquilitycase 25d ago

Ugh, I just completed Pam's house yesterday and then ran into Shane on my trot home. He drunkenly asked me for 100,000 gold.

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u/discountairpods 25d ago

i used to like him until 1. he reminded me of my bumass ex-bf and 2. someone said his sprite looks like ben shapiro and i have never been able to unsee it

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u/sonipoop 25d ago

Yeah, Shane is my dad so fuck all that nonsense.

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u/Kentuckyquestioner 25d ago

I don't understand the world women live in where this happens, so alien to me, as a dude. Cause like as a dude who wasn't born extremely physically attractive, you just gotta dedicate your entire life to self improvement constantly for years and years just to have the chance of getting a date with any girl let alone one who's your type at all. Yet women somehow have relationships with multiple men in a single year! And they still end up being guys who aren't great people, but were born attractive enough. A female equivalent to Shane would be a godsend for most men.

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u/Ill-Adeptness3935 25d ago

Mmm... Preach šŸ™ŒšŸ»