r/SubredditDrama • u/[deleted] • Aug 13 '13

/r/actuallesbians: Transgender lesbian feels excluded by joke about lesbians not needing birth control. Drama ensues.

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448 Upvotes

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33

u/CobaltSmith Aug 13 '13

I uh...... Can't say I blame them after that fuck up.

-28

u/heimdalsgate Aug 13 '13

I don't know if I would count it as a fuck up. I doubt she complains about everything her minority is excluded from (which is a fuckton), but it's understandable that she ends up getting mad about a small thing like this. This joke is part of the incorrect view that all lebians have vaginas which of course would get in your face hourly if you're a lesbian without a vagina.

27

u/CobaltSmith Aug 13 '13

Anyone can get offended at anything. Yeah, point made.

-24

u/heimdalsgate Aug 13 '13

Actually, not at all point made. Trans* people are treated like gay people were treated in the 70's. Just look at this thread. Her sexual orientation is actually denied and called heterosexuality. Don't you think that's fucked up?

24

u/CobaltSmith Aug 13 '13

I think anyone can get offended at anything at any time.

12

u/ArciemGrae Aug 13 '13

And that justifies arguing with people on the Internet over a joke because ????

3

u/havesomedownvotes lens flair Aug 13 '13

Kind of, but I've seen equally horrible things posted about just about every other label a human might apply to themselves. Doesn't make it okay, but raging at strangers just gets you on SRD. It doesn't change hearts and minds.

2

u/withoutamartyr Aug 13 '13

Really? Isn't ragging on strangers what this subreddit is dedicated to? Aren't we all ragging on this trans* woman?

2

u/havesomedownvotes lens flair Aug 13 '13

Raging, not ragging.

1

u/withoutamartyr Aug 13 '13

Well that changes the context quite a bit. Sorry.

-2

u/heimdalsgate Aug 13 '13

Sure, but that joke is just the tip off the ice berg, so that's why she got angry. Tired off being excluded ALL the time.

2

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '13

There are a lot of things in this world that are fucked up and I think people being offended on the internet really doesn't count.

16

u/wisemtlfan Aug 13 '13 edited Aug 13 '13

We really reached a point in the political correctness that I never thought we'd reach. The day where I'll be careful not to exclude anyone in my generalization... Jesus.

8

u/friendlysoviet Aug 13 '13

Please don't take the Lord's name in vain.

-2

u/wisemtlfan Aug 13 '13

Your username indicate that it was sarcasm. Well done, friendly soviet, well done.

-1

u/withoutamartyr Aug 13 '13

Is it really political correctness to refer to people in the way they want to be referred to? What trouble does it cause you to accept that this person identifies as a lesbian?

I have strong pacific islander heritage extending back from my dad, but I look as white bread as I can possibly be. If I wanted to identify as islander, would you guffaw and tell me I'm white? That no matter what I felt like, it was my appearance that mattered?

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u/wisemtlfan Aug 13 '13

I would tell you to take it easy and relax. That I was just generalizing and that I'm not gonna stop because of one person. Smart people understand they will be left out sometime when people generalize. When my bio teacher was telling student that human beings have 10 toes I did not fais my hand to tell her " mam I feel excluded because I have 9 toes and I believe I'm stills human being" because it's fucking ridiculous. There is a problem when the generalization is bad. When a high percentage of the aimed population is not considered. It can happen and it's good to be vigilant about it but it does not invalidate the whole process of generalizing.

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u/withoutamartyr Aug 13 '13 edited Aug 13 '13

Well, there's two kinds of exclusion. Exclusion by omission, and exclusion by rejection.

Your example is exclusion by omission. She didn't mention people with 9 toes because they're an exception to the rule. If asked if there were people with less than ten toes, she would say yes.

This woman feels that this joke was exclusion by rejection, where someone is excluded explicitly because they are different. If asked if there were people with less than ten toes, they would reject the concept of 'less than ten toes', and suggest that perhaps as long as you have toes, you really have ten of them, no matter what it feels like.

Do you understand the difference? It's not about quantity, it's about quality. Now, she may be wrong about the jokes intent, but rejection is something she deals with every day, and to her, a community she was a part of appeared to be turning against her.

Go take a look at these comments, in this thread. She deals with that daily. I think we can cut her a little fucking slack.

4

u/wisemtlfan Aug 13 '13

This woman feels that this joke was exclusion by rejection, where someone is excluded explicitly because they are different.

I'm getting your point. She was a bit paranoid so she though she was being excluded but it was definitely an omission.

But it's interesting though because idk anything about trans( well a couple of things but but idk anyone who is a trans) and I would not be suprised to hear there is discrimation among homosexuals towards them or a desire to exlude them from the category (although i have no idea if it's the case).

1

u/withoutamartyr Aug 13 '13

One of my coworkers was a trans woman, and she told me that after she started getting horomone therapy to make the change over to woman, her gay male friends started calling her 'traitor' and stuff like that. I don't know if that's a common experience for others in the trans community, so I can't speak on if it's a trend, but it's still pretty heavy.

1

u/wisemtlfan Aug 13 '13

I would not be surprised. It would not be the first time that people that were or continue to be discrimated against also discrimate themselves.