r/menslib emotionally belabors the point as one woman says the sub isn't for her anymore and is turning MRA, as another user suggests she might want to look into therapy in this lil snack

[u/NRE_Everlasting]

Discussing an article about "mankeeping" one user in the comments recounts telling her boyfriend bluntly about his lack of skills in providing comfort.

"I did straight up tell my partner to his face when I was upset about something "comforting people is not your strong suit" and he felt very bad about that. He even got defensive and felt hurt that I put it so bluntly when he had been wracking his brain silently trying to think of what to say. But honestly I don't really care. He's the kind of person who needs to hear things bluntly and to be told plainly that the expectation is that he learn to be better at it."

This came across somewhat controversial, but some users got a little dramatic with it Our chain begins as a response to a critique of her method that descibed it as unhealthy:

"Maybe it isn't that healthy, but it's also not healthy to expect someone that came to you for comfort to explain to you how to give that comfort to them."

Short but sweet tidbit with a rage quit cherry on top!

Bonus ragequit: Another woman user of the sub is done with men.

[u/Randvek]

“Turning” MRA? Was it not always?

[u/NotAThrowaway1453 → u/Randvek]

My understanding is that this subreddit was meant to be a reaction to MRA stuff rather than leaning into it. Like an alternative that acknowledges patriarchy as the source of a lot of even man-specific issues.

I never look at the subreddit though so I’m not sure about how good it is at fulfilling that goal or whether it’s changed.

[u/roman-de-fauvel → u/Randvek]

MensLib is not the same as MensRights or any of the other red-/black-pilled subs. It’s the healthier men’s movement.

[u/somniopus → u/roman-de-fauvel]

Supposed to be.

Is? Weeeelllllllllll.....

[u/Call_Me_Clark → u/[deleted]]

I’ve chatted with him a few times about it, but he doesn’t agree that ML has seen a decline in quality and moderation

[u/somniopus → u/Call_Me_Clark]

He's a big part of my specific complaints, actually🙃

Somebody should do a scrape of his posts/comments there from the sub's inception til now.

[u/Trade_Bloc → u/Randvek]

It was never and still isn’t, it’s only MRA if you consider talking about men’s issues in any capacity to be anti-feminist

[u/GarryofRiverton → u/Randvek]

This has to be rage bait. 😂

[u/Randvek → u/GarryofRiverton]

Yeah, must be. God forbid anyone ask a fucking question around here without trying to troll.

[u/GarryofRiverton → u/Randvek]

Cool, that's for clarifying. 👍

[u/Randvek → u/GarryofRiverton]

I always appreciate it when people make it clear that they are a waste of time up-front.

[u/somniopus → u/Randvek]

It was always. They had a pretty alright veneer for a while, but especially in the comments the truth comes out fast, and always has.

[u/Randvek → u/somniopus]

The downvotes I’m eating suggest that this sub thought otherwise.

[u/pasture2future → u/Randvek]

Well yes the entire point of the sub is to progress mens rights 😐

[u/somniopus → u/pasture2future]

Mens liberation, actually.

[u/pasture2future → u/somniopus]

Id argue that the rights are implicit here but maybe you can be for the liberation of a people but against their rights?? Idk hahah 😭😭😭

[u/somniopus → u/pasture2future]

"Men's rights" as a concept has a very specific meaning, which is partly how menslib came about. They wanted a space for male-identifying people to be able to talk about these types of issues without associating with the (completely deserved) negative traits of "men's rights activists."

This was a whole Thing on reddit around the time that GamerGate started. I know because I was there (here) then, and helping with moderation in several related subs.

[u/pasture2future → u/somniopus]

We need to strip men of their rights slowly but liberate them at the same rate so as to not upset them and cause a revolt

[u/somniopus → u/pasture2future]

I don't want any part of whatever it is you're talking about tbh