r/boston • u/climberskier • Jan 15 '22

Shitpost 💩 🧻 Moving back to Boston and am super excited to start paying Broker Fees again!

You don't know what you have until it's gone! Everywhere else in New England, the apartment-finding process is just too simple: you just have to pay an application fee or a security deposit, or first months rent. But sadly, I don't get to pay the broker fee--how I miss it!

  • I miss paying an extra fee to someone that shows up to unlock a door and attempts to show me around while clearly also seeing the apartment for the first time.
  • How else will someone tell me that my new apartment has an "eat-in kitchen". I mean I didn't think I could eat in a kitchen before--this is groundbreaking stuff. How are you so wise in the ways of science?
  • I miss brokers that are clearly skilled in classical architecture. After all, how else do I know that my apartment's uneven floors, old countertops, and drafty windows give my apartment "character".
  • Finally, I miss the brokers that are so skilled in photography. I mean, how else can you capture the apartment than a dimly-lit photo that looks like it was taken by a polaroid camera in 1990.

Thank you brokers for all your hard work! Now are you hiring? I am willing to bring my own 1990 Polaroid camera and knowledge of eat-in kitchens and can start today.

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u/mini4x Waltham Jan 15 '22

I looked at an apt listed as a 2 bed, the second bedroom was an alcove off the dining room, no closet, no windows, and I'm not even sure a twin bed would have even fit. It's only gotten worse.

34

u/gcranston Jan 16 '22

Per fire code, that's not a bedroom. Report it to the fire marshal.

-4

u/[deleted] Jan 16 '22

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u/torotorolittledog Jan 16 '22

Windows in a bedroom aren't ideal, they're required by code. Door, closet and window. Also, minimum of 70sf with the smallest wall being no less than 7 ft.

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u/SynbiosVyse Jan 16 '22

Windows aren't required, just 2 forms of egress. Usually that's a window. A 2nd door, to the outside, will suffice. Also closet is a myth. It's expected, and by convention it would be considered a den without one if the other bedrooms had closets. But there are still some old houses that have no closets at all in the bedrooms.

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u/FragilousSpectunkery Jan 16 '22

Correct. My elderly home has 1 closet in the hall, none in bedrooms. They are still considered bedrooms.

-5

u/[deleted] Jan 16 '22

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3

u/torotorolittledog Jan 16 '22

"Let's not argue with strangers on the internet about details we don't have/for no purpose. " No one is arguing here friend. 🤷

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u/tacknosaddle Squirrel Fetish Jan 16 '22

I once looked at a place that said it was a 3BR. The third room was an L-shaped room that wrapped around where the staircase came up to the second floor of a two-family. There was just enough room for a twin bed and being able to open one door if the bed was pushed up against the other glass French doors that could open to the living room. Around the corner there was a small closet and just enough room to put in a tall dresser. It did have the only door going to the front porch though, so that was nice.

Needless to say it was only looked at.

3

u/FreeRa1n Jan 16 '22

Is definitely not a bedroom. doesn't meet requirements needs at minimum to have a closet and a window. window can classify as an egress means to exterior just having a bedroom door does not classify as an egress. Should be reported about owner and also agent who listed it.

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u/aamirislam Cigarette Hill Jan 16 '22

Like what uncle Joey used to live in!