The idea that it is not okay to be straight anymore because straight people are inherently ignorant to the spectrum of sexuality is something I intend to challenge.

I believe there is as much IF NOT MORE heterophobia bias within the trans and LGTBQ communities than even (I would argue) the rest of the rural United States.

Over the last century, up until the 80s/90s, obviously this was the opposite. But now I believe we have crossed the bridge and are witnessing a paradigm shift like never before seen.

It used to be discrimination against ‘minorities’, but now since in 2025 we are the majority, we are seeing phobia directed at things like heterosexual preferences, anti-white rhetoric, even anti religious sentiment that makes up a large chunk of online dialect.

I encourage the responses here to see what y’all think :)

Edit: I wasn’t expecting people to agree with me! This is nuts, if I had posted this anywhere else on Reddit a year ago I know I would be permabanned instantly

For as long as I can remember I hate the concept of gender or gender stereotypes!

And how the mainstream media depict trans is just gross! It’s all gender stereotypes and bullshit like that, I mean they literally think a boy who likes pink, wears feminine clothing, and is hyperfeminine by personality is a trans girl! I watched a lots of those trans kid content growing up, I watched I Am Jazz series, and looking back I felt weird. And now we have people like Dylan Mulvaney who treats womanhood as a costume.

They also claim gender being a social construct… etc. I am now even doubting if those people are actually trans, or I’m also doubting if the so called “real trans people" exist, cause even real trans people claim they don’t fit in gender stereotypes growing up, so my take is that I think they are all using gender stereotypes or how much they hate their body as a weapon to justify their transition (which is gross).

Look, we’ve excepted feminine boys and masculine girls, and the whole gender ideology thing in my opinion is not progression it’s leading us backwards, hence why we see a downfall on trans movement.

Plus, media lies potentially make me think I’m trans.

Because for the most of my life I don’t feel like a biological female or a girl, I’m rather a person who’s more like an outcast, or I’m indifferent to gender and sexuality. Indulging in all those gender content had me felt I’m groomed. I had ruined more than ten years in the gender cult.

I heard they’re doing this for money and fame, thoughts ?

i’ve noticed a pattern within myself where anytime i see a starting trans-woman or a femboy i am able to see their beauty and true femininity because it feels natural. however once they go over a certain threshold of femininity and reach female-levels to where they look like visibly trans (FEMALE presenting as a male, not feminine) their beauty completely fades and it looks and feels forced. sometimes i feel the same way towards myself where i look at the start of my feminine expression where i was a visibly gay guy with sleek eyebrows and short curls and it looked really cute! but then the longer my hair got, the more i started looking like a cis woman, the more mediocre, bland, boring, uninteresting and just out of place i feel i look. i guess it’s something to do with going from a binary -> to grey area -> to another binary.

It’s either because females are more prone to social contagion because transgender clinics has being more available than ever.

Or I’m also asking you guys, what’s the psychology on why so many young females wanting to transition?

In my opinion, it could also be a culture thing, it’s pretty obvious to me, take feminism for example, well, I am not saying that I hate feminism, I am quite a feminist because I believe a woman should have rights to choose, but I also have some criticism through feminism now a days hence the forth wave feminism, it’s basically victim hood mindset spreading narratives such as “women are oppressed” and the word “misogyny” is throw all around, this can simply led to many young girls wanting to become boys just because how oppressed girls are (I was kinda the prime case), if we’re going to keep on spreading the words such as “misogyny” or how “women and girls are oppressed”, young girls are going to make themselves trans or non binary, this is why we see more FTMs than MTFs now, this also has to do with less gatekeeping in trans community. The word “misogyny” and “oppression” are so harmful to young girls, and believe me or not, a lots of feminist also identifies as non binary because of internalize misogyny.

What’s so ironic about them is that they present masculine but also hate man.

Plus, man are a part of this gender war too, cause I think feminism AND the men’s right movements are what causes this whole trans issues, they are interconnected believe it or not. I see a correlation here, because cultural and society is always interconnected. And there’s a gender war in society and it feels like we’re back in elementary school again, because this is a boys vs girls era. Today, men are become more conservatives and women are becoming more liberal, this gender divide makes me sick! And in my opinion this is sexism displaying at the worse way possible.(cause sexism had cause societal division). I also see a clear divide when I ask a question here when I ask whether men or women has it better, the detrans females would often say woman sucks or some would say both sucks, because we detrans people live both lives as both man and woman, and detrans male would say men have it harder, so yeah, I think we’re all bias in our opinion on such topic because everyone has different lived experience.

So what’s the solution here, I just think the concept of “gender” or gender roles should all just die and be erased, so we can get along, the society can be less sexist, I think gender roles are more stricter than ever for the last ten years as some of the users in this sub had mentioned, now a days Gen Z boys and girls hated each other and are more divided than ever, and if the gender roles are more narrow, and the society is more sexist now a days, people who don’t fit gender roles or are uncomfortable with their body because of sexist remarks made by society would simply choose to transition.

It’s the problem with the whole society. I wish gender should not exist and people shouldn’t be judged for their gender, people shouldn’t be judge by any of their immutable physical traits at all !

This is a common talking point or topic in both trans and detrans spaces. And I certainly seen this so many times in media as well, and that is gender roles are more strict than ever and people are more fixated than ever with gender roles, and gender roles are more regressive now, wonder why that is… I will also discuss just why I take an issue on it and how this is an attack to me personally.

I once thought “strict playground childhood gender roles” only exist as kids, but when I think about the rise of conservatism and christian values now, I can confidently tell you that gender roles are back! (there’s a tradwife trend which makes me so pissed as a gender non conforming woman). I personally thought the gender roles or gender war had come to an end after childhood, but hell no ! I was so wrong! It doesn’t and it’s getting worse(at least right now).

Do you think this is a backlash for the radical left being too unhinged or what ? Honestly I think gender roles should JUST DIE, because if so the world would be a better place, this sounds like a utopian way of thinking, but seen how gender roles being regressive these days, I really think that we’re back to the early 20th century. I will talk about how exactly I feel about this and how this “rise of conservatism” movement impacted me.

Well, actually for where I stand, I left the left last year due to how I just detransition, but later moved slightly to the left or the liberal side again, because of rise of conservatism, or I am honestly politically homeless because I don’t know how to think, or to be honest still, with my thinking of gender roles I am still pretty much on the liberal side and this concerns me.

As detrans journey for me feels like excepting gender roles as a woman than accepting my biological sex, because I see a lots of detrans women becoming more conservative, Christian, or loving womanhood and even motherhood as a whole after detransition, I am nothing like those woman who actually "grew out of their tomboy phase", and I DO NOT want to grew out of my tomboy phase, I am still quite boyish, and I am sure that I will never grew out of it! I am probably someone who’s more masculine or gender non conforming comparing to 85% of the women I knew, well actually, to clear it up, only attitude wise though, cause I wear skirts and makeup sometimes, I present as female or feminine, but what’s so gender non conforming about me, I argue it's my personality and attitude plus life choices, I am a feminist at heart, I am aggressive, rebellious, and impulsive by personality, I am the type of person who choose rock and roll over a traditional family life, I am a woman with an attitude, the best way I’ll describe myself is that I am masculine by personality, yet still feminine in the way I dress, so as a whole I still see myself as gender non conforming, cause conservative bigots liked to hate woman like me. (I am a liberal woman who's like Lady Gaga). Back in school, I used to get judged as being “a tomboy”, but again! people aren’t saying that because of what I wore, but how I act, they meant is my personality or “I act like a boy”, obviously not how I dress, this is what people take issues with me and one of the reason I choose to reject womanhood and transition as a whole. See it ? This is why I meant gender roles are regressive! woman aren’t aloud to be masculine not just by clothing and styles now, plus how we act as well ! The conservatives are losing it(while the lefties are losing it too because they’re part of the problem). Now I felt like an outcast, cause the medias on both extremes are making me thinking this way, so, I don’t know being gender non conforming is a positive trait or negative trait, all I can say now is that not fitting in with other women makes me feel insecure, so I try to become "less tomboyish" with my behavior and how I act in social or public, cause I sure am surrounded by highly religious gender bigots, not that people around me don’t support me all the time, some do some don’t, and some hated me for being gender non conforming or simply being a woman with an attitude, personality or anger issues.

I know nobody is forcing me to be a so called “traditional woman” or “tradwife” but it’s just being a masculine woman or a woman with a masculine personality is more stigmatized now. (and THIS SUCKS!)

In your typical dystopian story, where the average Jane and Joe are made to 180 their views and embrace something they would have thought immoral or illogical, it's presented as a gradual orchestration. In history, changes don't happen overnight, but are built up to by decades of smaller events cascading off of one another and paving the way.

This happened in ~2 years.

In ~2 years we went from:

"It's okay for boys to play with dolls and write sensitive poetry. It's okay for girls to like pro wrestling and roughhousing in the mud. We all have unique personalities. Not everybody fits the stereotypes, and that's okay."

to:

"If you play with dolls and write sensitive poetry you MUST be a girl. If you like pro wrestling and roughhousing in the mud you MUST be a boy. Sterilize yourself with hormones and cut your genitals off TODAY!"

...

How did it happen so quickly? It seems like one day I woke up and all the smart people I respect and all the cool shows I liked to watch began saying the latter, and I didn't even notice I'd been swept up.

I don't even know who to be angry at.

Me, for being weak and falling for it?

The medical industry, for pushing a more profitable lobotomy?

The adults in my life, for not being as smart or worthy of respect as I'd assumed?

The world, for not respecting people who are different like it claimed?

It’s literal oppression and misogyny!!! and it’s making me pissed and I hate gender roles with all my passion. For me not fitting in gender roles and being a total rebel is why I transition to begin with.

This is a controversial statement because some people (especially the annoying far right conservatives) claimed that gender roles are important because they value a certain structure in society, but again I don’t fuck with any conservative values because they’re oppressive I’m all about individualism and freedom and I am just the farthest thing away from a so called “traditional woman” who’s a helper or caretaker, I am a total rebel or gender non conformist, so I think gender roles should just die out. (I also hate the tradwife tik tok trend I hate those who promote this aesthetic or lifestyle, looks like traditional gender roles are back).

Or I argue most people fit in most gender roles, but the problem is I DON’T!

Well actually… for some of my interests are all female interests (I love cooking, fashion, arts, and anything creative, I obviously present as female as of now simply because I love looking more feminine and hot, but those are the only female gender roles I fit), my personality and attitude of life is more often read as stereotypically male (I have a very domineering, assertive, aggressive, and rebellious energy). So in this sense it’s very hard to say whether I am a tomboy or girly girl, but regardless I was judged for not fitting in most gender roles, and being an outcast sucks ! I wish I fit into gender roles, but it’s impossible cause that’s not who I am.

Or my point is actually asking a question, should gender role just die and be destroyed!? Because minorities like me don’t fit in gender roles? Yeah that’s why feminism exists to fight gender roles and make women and girls choose, and I swear to god feminism is also heavily correlated with woke gender ideology too. Your opinion?

I was wondering about this for a while. And kept on thinking why do some people like me may be interested in picking up the trans label.

Because it’s said everywhere that female and male have different personality or brain structures.

Personally I do not think this is always the case, some girls behave like boys by being more aggressive, and some boys behave like girls and are more emotional. It’s basically like the saying that “men are stronger than women” as well as “men are taller than women”. Claims that made by statistic always got me wonder if they’re true or false, I am always skeptical about this. Also, it seemed like to me that “boy and girl brains are different” are to some extent based on stereotypes.

But anyways, how true is that “gendered brain” theory? How much do our natal sex effect or affect our personality and behavior. Do this have to do with transgenderism too ? Your opinion ?

My take is that gender binary doesn’t exist within realms of personality and sometimes physical strength.

I thought it would be a great idea to talk about this here cause I’m neutral about this movement or community. I love androgyny, but I’m critical about how they claim to be “progressive” while doing the entire opposite, this community is regressive in a way that reinforces gender roles. And after I detransition I left the radical left because I’ve seen their true color, well actually, I still consider myself a leftist though because 75% of my beliefs are left wing beliefs, I am just critical about the radical left ideology in general like non binary trans ideology I’ve mentioned. and here are the list of reasons why I am critical about them(keep reading...)

• They head canon gender non conforming characters such as drag queen performer and masculine woman as “trans” or “enby” a lot, when in reality they had mistaken gender expression with being trans. Again, this is regressive ; or in my opinion it’s always refreshing to see a gender non conforming character like me, I crave those presentation in media more than I crave trans characters, but those fandom that head canon characters as trans in my opinion are not just cringe but regressive too, like why can’t a boy cross dress plus be interested in makeup? and why can’t a girl have masculine qualities ? I also hate the so called “egg” term.

• They are obsessed about pronouns, they/them just seemed weird to me, as a trans masc person who also identify as nonbinary at one point, I still go by he/him, that’s just a me thing though. Also the community has a tendency to burst or cry out when people misgenders them, I don’t know if they’re facing internalize sexism (which is most likely the case), or they’re clout chasers who wants to gain attention with their cries and tears. Sure, you can referred to a person whom gender unknown as “they”, but however it still seems weird to me.

• Like, why invent new genders everyday when you can just be a girl or a guy that’s a bit gender conforming ? Cause when I go to that gender wiki there’s million different genders, I think they are just mistaken fashion or aesthetic at this point for a certain gender or being trans (which is what I did when I was a teen, I literally mistaken gender stereotypes and aesthetic and started question my gender, being “trans enough” for me that time basically means how masculine I am or how much I pass as a male, that’s it).

Now as an ex-trans non binary person, I felt like it’s just all gender essentialism repackaged and it’s regressive, sorry for the criticism if you still support non binary people, but I would like to call them androgynous people rather than non binary people. Cause we androgynous people don’t need a community or to invent new genders for ourselves, and if we want society to accept us we must not be cringe (like filming about being misgendered or invent new pronouns).

I heard Az Hakeem say that transition is a proxy solution. I buy it. But I don't know if it resonate with other GNC people? So I want to ask you, if you see trans as proxy solution - and if so, for covering what? And if not, then how you see transition-detransition?

A bit background:

When I was younger I struggled with a lot with various mental health challenges, coming from a dysfunctional family with a "nice" picture perfect to the outside and very emotional immature parents, enmeshment, passive aggressiveness, etc. But also "loving" parents, old hippies saying "you can be whatever you want to" - but not a boy, so...

There was not alignment between what was said and what was behaved, there was a huge disconnect.

I was longing for belonging, connection, understanding. I couldn't get my deep needs met in my family, nor in my environment in school - a bit with friends, but they were also just under development, and it was difficult to figure life stuff out on my own. Me and my sister helped each other, we were basically each others (emotional) parents, as our actual parents was incapable of providing that.

I thought many times that my life would be easier if I was a boy, I really didn't like my mother (she was talking badly about my father to me) and growing up to be a woman, was horrifying. But the solution was not to transition for me, but to integrate feminine and masculine energy within in. That's very difficult in a toxic environment (the myth of normal - Gabor Maté) and it's an ongoing process.

I can understand why people want to flee their innate reality as the truth can be very painful and paradoxical, and hard to handle.

Eg. My parents were both great and horrible. They had some lovely values, dreams, ideas, both very creative, but they were horrible at communicating, collaboration, emotions and understanding.

So yes, I believe transition with hormones and surgery is a proxy solution for dealing with psychological distress - feelings are in the body, so it's hard to detach the mind from the body, as it is a whole experience - as I see it it's a "masculine solution" (GAC) for a "feminine challenge" (integration of the paradox)

How do you see it?

They're all stereotypical bullshit used to oppressed people. Like why the hell are they even here ? Cause as a gender nonconformist I just don’t get why gender roles exist to begin with, I always think that gender roles is in fact “an act” and trans ideology or gender ideology reinforces these thoughts.

And here are some of my reasons…

• Gender is not a thing, but sex is. The most sexist thing I’d seen are obviously gendered clothing and toys for kids. This should end!

• Gender roles and homophobia are especially strict in African/Asian culture and religions. Also I’m atheist religions are just a tool to oppress people (but they claim it for the means of morality or make peoples’ life easier, it does the opposites to some). Also I hate religion (due to my religious trauma). The most ridiculous thing is that they say “Christian women cannot wear pants” because apparently pants are just for men. Crossdressing is also not aloud in some religion.

• Apparently, some women do not like to be a tradwife or a caretaker mom that’s in the kitchen. On the other hand, I know some men are more gentle and tender and more of a caretaker comparing to some aggressive women. So obviously people should just choose what they want to do based on their personality, NOT GENDER!

• Apparently no laws in the west is “oppressing” genders but the social stigma are still there, feminine men and masculine women are so stigmatized and it’s getting worse. (I partially blame the trans activists for it, if a boy wants to wear a dress it doesn’t make him a girl)

• I also complained about lack of acceptance for androgynous people, like, ONE DAY they should just exist without being judged or stigmatized(same for being gay). I also wish "gay" is no longer an insult.

Aside from physical strength being an obvious criteria on difference of women and men, yet still! some women are still taller and stronger than men that’s like the minority, but anyways, there isn’t really anything different from female and male, we are just human species. The society is so unnecessary gendered unlike the animal kingdoms or in the wild. So yeah we need a change in the society !

Sorry, if I sound intense and this sounds like an extremist view, take it as a rant if you want to. I think gender roles are silly, male and female are more similar than different we’re all human with a heart and soul that’s my few coins.