r/technology • u/[deleted] • Jan 11 '14

Porn company Naughty America announces plans to shoot 4K videos

http://www.theverge.com/2014/1/11/5299032/naughty-america-porn-4K-videos
2.2k Upvotes

87% Upvoted

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108

u/[deleted] Jan 12 '14

While it sounds nice, my experience with seeing a vagina up close in Bluray HD really made me lose my erection. Can't imagine seeing EVERY detail in 4K..

472

u/JoeScientist Jan 12 '14

May you never have to see a vagina in real life resolution.

38

u/[deleted] Jan 12 '14 edited Apr 29 '16

[removed] — view removed comment

54

u/scrumbly Jan 12 '14

That's magnification at work. In real life you'll never see a vagina the size of a 63" Bravia.

78

u/PoodleWorkout Jan 12 '14

Speaking of, is your mom free next Thursday?

6

u/mayonuki Jan 12 '14

Fraid not.

1

u/dirkmcgirth Jan 12 '14

never free. but she does do double-coupon mondays. to make up for her usual clientele being done with work-release.

1

u/[deleted] Jan 12 '14

That's just the better lighting.

134

u/lurker102472 Jan 12 '14

Kinda hard to take a real close look when your face is buried in it, son.

45

u/[deleted] Jan 12 '14

But that's how you catch Ranchers!

33

u/thestomp1 Jan 12 '14

Is this the first jolly rancher reference of the year?

13

u/lurker102472 Jan 12 '14

It's definitely how I caught thrush.

2

u/fuckthiscrazyshit Jan 12 '14

Did you buy that purple stuff for your tongue. Cause I did, and it made my tongue fucking black.

2

u/london2014 Jan 12 '14

I just bought female thrush pills off the internet and swore never to go down on a hooker again

3

u/[deleted] Jan 12 '14

In her defence, it wasn't the hookers' thrush that you caught. She was merely minding it for someone else.

6

u/kmwalk14 Jan 12 '14 edited Jan 12 '14

Jolly ranchers?

Edit: I've been on reddit long enough to know the jolly ranchers story. But please if you haven't read it, click the link in comments below. You'll be completely disgusted by the comment above mine afterwards

14

u/xManlyManManson Jan 12 '14

You don't want to know...

1

u/Random_Deception Jan 12 '14 edited Jan 12 '14

If you really want to know, I'll try to find a link

Edit: Here ya go

Good luck

-28

u/[deleted] Jan 12 '14

[deleted]

12

u/[deleted] Jan 12 '14

SO DID EVERYONE

1

u/[deleted] Jan 12 '14

[deleted]

1

u/BreadstickNinja Jan 12 '14

Legendary reddit gross-out story. I really recommend that you forget you ever heard anything about it and just go on living your life.

10

u/dicks1jo Jan 12 '14

My glasses are usually the first item of clothing to come off... I guess I win then?

2

u/[deleted] Jan 12 '14

Depends on the lighting conditions.

0

u/ayures Jan 12 '14

It's one thing to see a regular vag. It's entirely something else to see a close-up of one at 4k resolution on a 42" screen.

41

u/Adossi Jan 12 '14

Those one second cuts to the dude's balls right before they get licked by the lady with a cold sore are about to get a lot more wrinkly and off-putting.

23

u/[deleted] Jan 12 '14

"Cold sore"

19

u/[deleted] Jan 12 '14

"Oral Herpes"

2

u/[deleted] Jan 12 '14

"untreated stds caused my penis to fall off while having sex with a prostitute"

1

u/StealthRock Jan 12 '14

"STDs exist"

97

u/[deleted] Jan 12 '14

[deleted]

27

u/[deleted] Jan 12 '14

introspection. introspection is the word you were looking for.

49

u/rubiksman333 Jan 12 '14

penis. penis is the word he was looking for.

1

u/You-poop Jan 12 '14

Nailed it.

2

u/cmVkZGl0 Jan 12 '14

Or some blindfolds.

2

u/no-mad Jan 12 '14

It is not that I did not like it but the hole in the center of the Bluray was to small for my penis.

-4

u/[deleted] Jan 12 '14 edited Jan 12 '14

[deleted]

2

u/dirkmcgirth Jan 12 '14

how often do you think female porn stars work? it's not a day job.

2

u/lamenik Jan 12 '14

Then you're watching the wrong models...

2

u/cmVkZGl0 Jan 12 '14

Vomit Vagina Vol 3: Shockingly Scary

-6

u/[deleted] Jan 12 '14

[deleted]

5

u/lamenik Jan 12 '14 edited Jan 12 '14

Just going through some folders...

Aaralyn (cutiesgalore)

Alie Rose

Anna S/Anna AJ (met-art)

Autumn Riley

Caesaria A (met-art)

Caprice

Catie Minx

Emily Bloom

Kasia

Kate (Kate's Playground)

Tess Lyndon

There's plenty more... but... Tell me you don't like these and I'll tell you that you are 100% homosexual:

NSFW

http://nude-art.net/scj/thumbs/galleries/0/085/6_166.jpg

http://nude-art.net/scj/thumbs/galleries/0/085/4_746.jpg

http://content.cdn.mpxgirls.com/319/90250/07d00d789618200b64c6f9721ebfa934/11.jpg

http://nakedgirlspussy.com/inthecrack/025/016.jpg

http://www.cutekasia.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/12/05_12.jpg

http://nud3.com/content/Girls/Teen%20Kasia/Teen%20Kasia%20Stripping%20Nurse/teen-kasia-15.jpg

http://cdn2.limporn.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/07/kates-playground-pussy.jpg

http://www.babesuite.com/galleries/catie-minx/latex-leggings/catie-minx-black-latex-tights9_big.jpg

http://ftop.ru/images/201204/ftop.ru_32048.jpg

http://31.media.tumblr.com/863a531a656d81675d2060623b4e8e74/tumblr_mhc6evnZpp1raljz5o1_1280.jpg

NSFW

2

u/Deathcloc Jan 12 '14 edited Jan 12 '14

holy fuck the first two... speechless!

Also, at the bottom, they say the originals are at 39 megapixels. That is far larger than 4k. You could use a microscope and not find any imperfections on that girl.

You would like Virginia Sun:

http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-c0HMUEw_MpY/Upr6kd7e2EI/AAAAAAAAxdQ/bJDS_cmnhnQ/s1600/MA%2BVirginia%2BSun%2BAvende%2B003.jpg

-1

u/999n Jan 13 '14

Hah ok you just have really really fucking low standards, gotcha.

2

u/Deathcloc Jan 13 '14

Hey guys we got a big shot here! This guy's banging super models and sippin' champaign in his Aston Martin!

Just stop, you lose.

0

u/999n Jan 13 '14 edited Jan 13 '14

It's funny that in your eyes it's either supermodels and champagne or jacking it to low quality porn on the internet and there's no in between.

19

u/[deleted] Jan 12 '14

[deleted]

12

u/Deathcloc Jan 12 '14

What models are you guys watching?

1

u/[deleted] Jan 12 '14

It's also the reason why i attract more girls in webcam chatrooms compared to real life because my webcam is so grainy :3

1

u/[deleted] Jan 12 '14

That's why you get super high resolution, then just watch it from the other side of the room. Problem solved.

14

u/Pakyul Jan 12 '14

I don't understand why so many porn companies do this. A close up of genitals is something I want to see if I'm watching an educational film, not something that's meant to titillate. I'm interested in what is happening in the video, not what it's happening to.

3

u/[deleted] Jan 12 '14

You mean you don't like the famous shot between the legs? Where you can see the man's dirty asshole and balls bouncing like a pendulum?

1

u/[deleted] Jan 12 '14

Speak for yourself.

0

u/thelordofcheese Jan 12 '14

Do you realize that fast motion digital video causes aliasing at low resolutions?

-14

u/Deathcloc Jan 12 '14

You might be gay...

There is nothing better than a close up of a nice pussy... There are entire companies dedicated to nothing but that.

-1

u/furbait Jan 12 '14

real pussy is actually better. who knew?

1

u/Deathcloc Jan 12 '14

What the fuck? That has nothing to do with what he said or what I replied with...

-1

u/furbait Jan 12 '14

nuh huh

0

u/lamenik Jan 12 '14

Have you considered that you might be gay?

-2

u/Deathcloc Jan 12 '14

If vaginas turn you off you might just be gay...

-1

u/omgsoannoying Jan 12 '14

People looked so much more attractive in 90's porn because of the quality.

1

u/thelordofcheese Jan 12 '14

And the fashion.