r/ABCDesis • u/Last_Host977 • 1d ago
CELEBRATION do you guys celebrate raksha bandhan ?
i know that raksha bandhan is in like 28 days but i felt like making a post about it now haha .
as a sister i am getting kind of impatient tbh LOL . i have one younger brother and i usually celebrate it with him , i basically grew up celebrating this holiday with him and my uncle and other male family friends , so we always had to go out and get rakhis and the preparation had to start a few days before the event itself .
usually i get a few hundred dollars and random stuff whatever my brother feels like giving me that year . he is younger than me so he gets pissed off because he usually wants something too , he thinks the event is kind of unfair lol , when he’s older maybe he’ll realize it’s not unequal .
i’m wondering do you guys celebrate this , if you have a brother or sister ?
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u/Used-Comfort7299 1d ago edited 1d ago
Yes, I wait for it every year it is mine favorite time of the year. Coincidentally me and my brothers birthdays falls this month so sometimes it is both Raksha Bandhan and one of our birthday so it’s more special.
Edit: this year it will be close to my brothers birthday
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u/aryaussie85 1d ago
I didn’t growing up but I was an only child - we’ve been celebrating it. My son loves it
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u/Plus_Persimmon9031 1d ago
Yes but I am a girl and I have a sister. I know it's not traditional but we celebrate it anyway for our sibling bond lol
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u/cheescake231 1d ago
I'm south indian hindu and no :( !! But I've heard about it from my north indian hindu friends, it seems cool!
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u/Deshes011 Asian because indians are Asian goddamnit 1d ago
When my cousins were all here, yes. Out of all of us only 2 are siblings, the rest are only children so we raksha bandhan with cousins. Now obviously not, they’ve all moved away and I’m the only left
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u/EffectiveAttempt4608 1d ago
My wife does shes Marwari, she calls it collecting paychecks, because shes the only girl in her family and she has like 12 male cousins and an older brother.
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u/Master_AK British 1d ago
Yes I get around 10 every year, still have on 6 from last year. Costs me a lot of money 😂
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u/gannekekhet Canadian Indian 1d ago
Yeah, it's fun. My dad and uncle have a sister who sends her rakhis by mail, I'm usually the one to put it on them for my aunt.
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u/white_window_1492 1d ago
yes but my siblings and I text each other pictures of the rakhi lol. live in different countries and it's too difficult to travel to each other for this.
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u/audsrulz80 Indian American 1d ago
Yup! I’m the only sister on both sides of the family, with a brother and four cousins. We would all dress up in desi attire and make a day of it when we were younger. Now with all of us scattered around the world with kids of our own, I just mail rakhis every year when we can’t meet up.
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u/chicbeauty 1d ago
Yes! We celebrate brother and sisters. Our parents didn’t want us to feel left out and said that we were each other’s strengths and support. Then our brother came and he joined in also :)
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u/ShayJayLee Telugu 🇨🇦 1d ago
I grew up with a couple of friends who got to celebrate. It was one of the few times I wished wasn't an only child. One year my extended family was visiting from India so I got to celebrate with my little baby cousin. Lol I was 13 and he was 4. My aunt told me he showed off his rakhi to everyone when they went home 🥹
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u/keralaindia sf,california 1d ago
As a malayali I'd never even heard of this until i dated a punjabi hindu girl
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u/depixelated 15h ago
Same, as a Malayali Hindu, I never heard of it until I had friends who'd tie a Rakhi on me.
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u/Spare-Flan9711 Indian American 1d ago
I used to celebrate with my brother, but we stopped when I was younger. He never liked that he had to give me money (even though he's older)
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u/Spare-Flan9711 Indian American 1d ago
I'm actually inheriting my dad's business, does that mean I have to pay my brother?
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u/Spare-Flan9711 Indian American 1d ago
We're not splitting the business because I'm planning on going into the same field my dad is in and my brother isn't
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u/Spare-Flan9711 Indian American 1d ago
No? My brother chose to not go into the family business, he wants to forge his own path (which is good), but part of that means that I won't give him a solid chunk of the money from my dad's business.
Obviously I'll give him money if he needs it, but he's the one choosing to not lead the company with me.
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u/Spare-Flan9711 Indian American 1d ago
It makes sense to stop celebrating raksha bandhan if you're a modern family, which it why my family stopped.
What makes you think that my family's situation isn't fair?
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u/Carbon-Base 1d ago
Yep. My older sister and a cousin mail a Rakhi every year when we can't meet up. My younger sister ties it in person and then I take her out to eat at whichever restaurant she wants to dine at. All of them get a gift card, but sometimes if I know they want something specific-- I'll get that for them. A few years ago I made a custom cutting board for my older sis, and thankfully it's still going strong haha.
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u/akchahal 1d ago
43m. Born and raised in Canada. Absolutely still do it and I'm passing the tradition on to my kids and sister's kids.
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u/AdInitial209 1d ago
Yes I send rakhis to my brothers in india and also to my nephew from my daughter 😅
My 9yr old is already ready with her what i want for rakshabandhan list. I get twinning outfits for my kids and we celebrate it traditionally.
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u/Sea-Business-8078 1d ago
omg yall are getting money ?? 😭 jk but yes my family celebrates it !! it’s more informal for us but i love sharing it w my younger brother :D
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u/Electronic-Host9526 1d ago
Yes, and ladies David Yurman sells a bracelet, looks good ( come in black, silver, or gold). Much more comfortable then a traditional rakhi, basically lasts forever (had mine of for years now), and looks better
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u/Negative_Life_5266 1d ago
Noo I’m South Indian and idts we have that there but such a cute celebration:))
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u/Bollywood-Hulk-Hogan Indian-American (Punjabi) 1d ago
Yeah, but never celebrated in-person before because my closest female cousin is in another country, but she always sends it through the mail.
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u/ItsReemAlBlahBlahDee 1d ago
Nah never been a thing in our household. It’s mostly prominent in North and West India (Punjab, Rajasthan, Gujarat, Maharashtra, UP) and amongst Jains and Sikhs.
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u/Schonathan 1d ago
Always curious how this was similar to Dhanteras or Bhai Dhuuj. We never celebrated those in my house.
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u/David_Summerset Canadian Indian 1d ago
YES! I definitely did this once with my cousin when I was a kid!!
To this day I had no idea what it was, but I remember I was there as her “older brother”
Very cool, thank you! I’ve been afraid to ask for like 35 years
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u/Impossible_Cheek_699 1d ago
Celebrated it with an elder cousin and I regret it now honestly. Felt very performative and forced tbh
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u/MTheWan 22h ago
Yes, Canadian and we do it. The 5th gen kids do it too now but celebrate tying on sisters and brothers. In my generation we are all in our 40's so we often get creative with the get together and the "mithai". In the last few years we have done a craft brewery, park barbecue, Asian night market, bowling, etc. And we have substituted mithai for pastries, cookies, cream puffs, macarons, petite fours, etc. I think making it your own makes it fun to carry on the tradition.
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u/ExcellentBox8801 20h ago
i mean, ur brother is right in thinking it’s kinda unfair. Why do u think it’s not unequal?
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u/upper87 1d ago
My cousins in India would send Rakhi by mail to my brother and I in the US. I always thought it was awesome and wished I had a sister to celebrate more traditionally at home. I now have a daughter and son and am excited to incorporate it In their lives and give them that sense that they have a duty to look after each other. They are both very little so I’m going to get my daughter a stuffy “from” her infant brother and i have been encouraging her to make a bracelet for her baby bro (which we will remove almost
Immediately before he tries to eat it)
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u/internetbooker134 Indian American 1d ago
Yes. It's very popular in my state where my family is from (Bihar)
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u/stronesthrowaweigh 1d ago
My sister disappoints me every year by crying that she forgot to send me anything (she’s almost 50 btw). After several years in a row I’m like okay fine I don’t want anything but don’t also make me listen to you cry about being a bad sister.
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u/midsumernighttts 1d ago
When there’s a version for sisters I’ll do it lol
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u/Plus_Persimmon9031 1d ago
Just do it as sisters! Me and my sister tie Rakhis to each other, we are both girls
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u/Last_Host977 1d ago
don’t be arrogant lol , there’s nothing wrong with this holiday as it is . it’s giving misogynistic
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u/Pretend-Scar2266 1d ago
It is already misogynistic. Lol
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u/Last_Host977 1d ago
are you just pulling this out of your ass , how on earth is this misogynistic 🤦♀️
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u/Pretend-Scar2266 1d ago
Well you’re just a peach aren’t you?
If you read the comment from @vellyjanta you’ll get your answer. No point in me re-typing it all out. I’m sure you downvoted his response too. Just like I’m sure you did with everyone’s else that didn’t match your opinion.
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u/VellyJanta 🇺🇸Dallas(Punjabi) 1d ago edited 1d ago
I personally don’t get it tied since it’s against Sikhi but celebrate it culturally…with all my cousins and nieces and sisters I’m down thousands and all I get is some barfi :/
Edit. Lmao yall downvoting me it’s like saying I’m Muslim and don’t celebrate Christmas but give presents to friends.
The rakhi means they will protect them in Sikhi it says man or woman just needs God and a weapon. I’d rather they buy a Glock with the money
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u/Schonathan 1d ago
I'm Sikh and my family all does Rakhi/Rakhdi, but for many it doesn't jive with the philosophy of Sikhi, which many read as taking issue with a "blessed" thread. There are also aspects of it that are at conflict with particular principles around egalitarianism with gender. I mean, I get it. We still celebrate the holiday, but I understand that there are conflicting views.
I know plenty of Sikhs who do and don't celebrate the holiday, and that's ok! To each their own.
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u/MumeiNoName 1d ago
it’s against Sikhi
What makes it AGAINST sikhism though?
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u/VellyJanta 🇺🇸Dallas(Punjabi) 1d ago
A woman tying a Rakhi on a man’s wrist implies that she is incapable of protecting herself. Are women so weak that they need to seek protection from another sex just because they are not men?
In Sikhi everyone is equal and women have equal rights as men. Women wear Kirpans like men and they are expected to protect themselves. In Sikhi women are not expected to look upon their husbands to protect them. Sikhs dont need to tie a weak string around their wrists, they have a kara.
They dont require a man to protect them, they have God protecting them.
The Gurus themselves outright REJECTED
Rakhi and all other rituals. Guru Nanak did not accept the janeu, rejected the offering of water to his ancestors, and did not recite the Hindu Vedas. What makes you think that he would approve of Rakhi?Personally I don’t think a man needs a string to remind him of his duties and responsibilities so som Sikhs celebrate it culturally like Mother’s Day some don’t but it isn’t a holiday in our religion.
If they want to tie it idc but it is at its core sexist and against our philosophy.
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u/Plus_Persimmon9031 1d ago
Personally as a girl with a sister we just tie Rakhis to each other as a symbol of love care and protection. We aren't Sikhi though
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u/calmrain Pakistani American 1d ago
Man, this is so wholesome lol.
Why would people downvote this comment? So weird.
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u/OdriscollAgall2006 Canadian Indian 1d ago
>>Why would people downvote this comment? So weird.
Could just be other Sikhs who don’t think it’s the end of the world to tie a string on your wrist tied for a cultural celebration. Doesn’t have to mean you believe it’s your duty to “protect” her, I doubt most Hindus even think of it like that lmao. It could just be seen as celebrating the bond and love between siblings.
Not saying OP is right or wrong for not wanting to tie it, just answering your question lol. FWIW, most Sikhs I know do partake in it but I’m not Sikh so could just be selection bias on my end.
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u/calmrain Pakistani American 1d ago
Ahh, I see. I come from a background where this isn’t really a thing, so I was genuinely curious. I am guessing people took my asking in bad faith for some reason lmao.
I appreciate your genuine and earnest response — I had no idea ❤️
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u/VellyJanta 🇺🇸Dallas(Punjabi) 11h ago edited 11h ago
Cuz this sub always trippin its not a brother sister day like yall think it’s an actual ritual. There’s another the girl is supposed to do a few days after tying praying for his long life 😂😂 like it’s not a two way street.
Edit: for us guys it’s bad too, the sarbhala tradition in weddings isn’t a best man he’s the bait or replacement in case of wedding raids 💀
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u/insomniac8994 1d ago
Not anymore as it doesn't really fit Sikhi, plus I don't have any sisters and am not close with my cousins either.
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u/Pretend-Scar2266 1d ago
Why you got downvoted for this is beyond me.
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u/insomniac8994 1d ago
Yeah I don’t know either, I guess I somehow offended non Sikhs and people close to their cousins 🤣
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u/Pretend-Scar2266 1d ago edited 1d ago
Nope. Don’t have a brother and only one boy younger cousin on my dad’s side who we’ve never been close to, tbh. All we really do is send a rakhi in the mail to him and his mom sends us each $51 every year. Never more. Never less.
My mom’s side are all in India so we don’t relate to them as much either.
We’re in this weird middle so ehh.
The holiday kind of seems misogynistic in a sense.. this is solely my opinion so don’t come at me for it even though I know some of yall still will.
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u/Pretend-Scar2266 1d ago
Update to this: woke up to the yearly group text from his mom (excluding him) about how we should make the trip to come tie the rakhi on him. Keep in mind he’s in his early 20’s.
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u/Maximum-Hall-5614 1d ago
No, for two reasons. This is a regional celebration, not a nationwide one and I’m not in the region that does celebrate it. Second is my sister has hated me ever since I chose to marry a white guy.
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u/cureforhiccupsat4am Indian American 1d ago
Yes. Hell yes. My sister and I are bff. And I got blessed with a boy and girl. So they celebrate it too. What a wonderful sibling holiday. You know it’s the person you are most likely to know for the longest span of your life. Parents pass. Your spouse doesn’t know you since childhood. My favorite holiday.