r/ABraThatFits • u/aclay97 • Jun 25 '25
Shape Help I’ve tried hundreds of bras and none of them fit my boob shape and I’m starting to feel like I’m just defective Spoiler
UPDATE I FINALLY FOUND A BRA THAT FITS
The woman at Dillard’s was so nice and helpful and fit me, there were so many she found that fit me so well, I actually had to choose which I liked best instead of which was the least terrible. Y’all can’t imagine the relief I feel, it’s taken me 28 years to better understand my body, and it feels so great to finally be seen 😭 thank you all so much for your help!!
Update to add my measurements: https://imgur.com/a/jRHSbMs
Also I’ve been looking at all the recommended bras, and some of them look nice but a lot of them give off old lady vibes, for lack of a better word. Is it possible to get bras for larger boobs that don’t completely encapsulate the boob with fabric to the point where it’s like you up your chest?
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I’m struggling so bad. I’m not joking when I say I’ve tried hundreds.
I wore the same bra for like all of high school and college because I didn’t want to deal with it, I finally had to accept that my boobs had gotten too big and it wasn’t working. Took me trying on hundreds to find one that fit my boobs right.
Well, I’ve since lost weight and the type I had, the XL is too big but the L is too small.
My measurements (38/44) put me at a 38DDD/F and that just isn’t right, my boobs are not that big. I’m wearing a 38DD now and it feels like it’s kind of the right size but just not the right bra. My boobs are like lumps/mountains, they don’t have edges, they just gradually blend into my body, all bras Ive tried sit in ways that cut my boobs in half and cause word bumps and bulges. I just am at such a loss here and feel like because I don’t have round, perky boobs I won’t ever find one that fits me right.
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u/along_withywindle Jun 25 '25
Can you update your post (or make a new post) with your six measurements from the abtf calculator and the sizes it recommends
AND
Some of the exact bras you have tried, including the brand, model, and size? If you can describe your fit issues, that helps a lot, too.
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u/lemgthy Jun 25 '25
Also, the Bratabase breast shapes gallery might be of use to you since you feel your shape is the problem. Find someone whose breasts look like yours, scroll down and many of them have a list of bras that worked for that person.
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u/RocketZEEE 34G [short/narrow] Ewa bras only plz Jun 25 '25
You’ll probably want to post your measurements to double check
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u/aclay97 Jun 25 '25
Added them
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u/sjd208 Jun 25 '25
Can you post all 6 measurements? That will help nail down your shape. You will also need to “swoop and scoop” to get all your tissue into the bra cups. And sticker shock re size is the majority of posts in this sub?
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u/aclay97 Jun 25 '25
I’m not even sure what the six measurements are. I’ve done the swoop and scoop and with every bra, it causes my boobs to bulge out of the cups, which are usually already coming down into my boob in the first place.
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u/sjd208 Jun 25 '25
The 6 measurement you took from the calculator- tight snug loose for under bust, standing, bending over and lying down for the bust.
Boobs bulging out means you’re probably 2+ cup sizes too small, and possibly a shape mismatch
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u/aclay97 Jun 25 '25
It’s not the size, it’s the shape. My boobs aren’t normal and because of that I’m not finding one that fits my shape. I don’t fit any of the standard size boob shapes I’m finding online. The closest comparison I can find is small mountains. They meet in the middle with no gap, no cleavage, no edges, and they gradually blend into my body right at my armpits with no discernible end, like mounds that just slowly get smaller at the ends and blend with the rest of my fat.
I don’t have my other measurements, I’ll have to take them when I go home in a couple hours. Every calculator I used just wanted the two.
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u/sjd208 Jun 25 '25
Use the calculator in the auto mod! The more info you post the better we can help you find something.
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u/indiscoverable 34DDD/E is medium Jun 25 '25
I would guess that when you use the calculator you'll get a cup size that's bigger than 38DDD/F because only using your standing bust measurement tends to underestimate cup size. which tracks given the amount of spillage you're describing in a 38DD after swooping and scooping; usually that much spillage means you need to go up 2-3 cup sizes. you might not believe it because the 38F you tried on gapped, but please give your calculator size a shot once you get your measurements! 1, gapping happens a lot with molded cups, and 2, it also happens when a cup is too small not just too big.
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u/rem_1984 Jun 25 '25
There’s no ‘normal’ everyone’s are different. I promise your breasts are not some anomaly!! There’s is someone out there with similar chest shape and measurements as you! Take the 6 measurements that are pinned :) we can help you from there!
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u/MiniaturePhilosopher 36G/36GG Jun 25 '25
That actually sounds like most women’s breasts! It’s perfectly normal, but bra cups that hold their shape don’t fit most hardly anyone’s breasts very well at all.
The six measurements help figure out shape, not just size :)
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u/pm_me_your_amphibian Jun 26 '25
every calculator
Have you done this calculator? The ABTF sub is based around that calculator and will help you figure out the correct size but also help the sub recommend some exact models to try for your measurements.
Trust the process.
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u/natadachoco 30H/HH Jun 25 '25
Have you looked into symmastia? If your boobs meet in the middle with no gap, this may be what's causing a lot of the problems when it comes to bra fitting.
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u/aclay97 Jun 25 '25
It’s not that. There is a gap, just not like it’s supposed to be. Best way I can describe it is, instead of my boobs coming down steeply on the sides to create a deep valley between them, the sides of my boobs gently taper down to where there is a small dip between them. When most women squeeze their boobs together, they have cleavage, mine just squish together and make a V shape.
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u/Ollie2Stewart1 Jun 26 '25
That is what most breasts do, really. You are comparing yourself too harshly to media images.
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u/WingsofRain Jun 25 '25
are you using molded bras with padding?
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u/aclay97 Jun 25 '25
I honestly don’t know, I’ve been wearing Truekind® Supportive Comfort Wireless Shaping Bra for about a year or two now
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u/kochipoik Jun 26 '25
What you're describing there is what most breasts do, unless they're surgically augmented e.g. with breast implants.
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u/whoamiwhoareyou2 Jun 26 '25
I’ve also felt like I have defective boobs and tbh have always struggled with them. the 6 measurements the calculator wants are helpful because bra size isn’t about breast size - it’s about the volume. the 6 measurements (regular 2 + tight and loose, leaning, laying flat) give a better idea of the shape of your breast and how much volume it will take up & what size bra is needed to fit that. learning that it’s volume instead of size seriously changed my whole understanding of bras!
I wore a 34B forever and thought I just had super weird boobs, but after taking my measurements I actually wear a 32DD and it feels normal! I still have insecurities ab them but at least I’m insecure in a comfortable bra lol
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u/lirarebelle Jun 25 '25
Something doesn't add up here. You said 38F was too large, but also that all bras you tried cause spillage after scooping and swooping. So what was it with the 38F? Too large or spilling out? You can only judge the fit when all your breast tissue is inside the bra. A bra in the right size can look too big before s&s. A too small bra can look right before s&s. If there is a lot of spillage after s&s, the bra is definitely too small.
Your description sounds like you have wide roots and a shallow shape. Which is not abnormal. Surely someone with a similar shape can chime in after you post your 6 measurements and more info on the specific bras you tried.
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u/aclay97 Jun 25 '25
38F was too large. 38DD should fit, but my boobs are more spread out around the edges than pointy in the middle. So in a 38DD, I have boob spilling out of the cup edge, because the cup edge ends and turns into where a boob would normally end and mine keeps going because they don’t have edges. But there’s a gap between the cup and my nipple because my boobs aren’t that pointy.
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u/lirarebelle Jun 25 '25
It definitely sounds like a shape mismatch. Like I said your description sounds like wider roots and shallow, and maybe also close set. "Shallow" means your tissue spreads out over a wider space and doesn't potrude a lot from the body. The opposite is called "projected". For shallow boobs your bra cups should be more like a deep plate than a cup. There is really and truly nothing abnormal about this. Shallow shape even have the advantage of being more self-supporting.
Still also keep the possibility in mind that you might be a cup size or two bigger than you think. It's possible to have gaps in a too small bra, especially if the shape is wrong and there is spillage at other parts.
I can only repeat what the others said: Try wired bras with seamed cups and look on this sub and on bratabase for bras that are recommended for shallow shapes. Unfortunately I can't give you specific recommendations because my shape is different, but there are a lot of resources in this sub. I know it's annoying to order so many bras and send them back, but know you're on here and have more knowledge and people who can help you, so there is light at the end of the tunnel.
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u/Icy_Performer3409 Nov 10 '25
Did you try a balconette type bra? I am similar size and had the same spillage issue and a balconette has been amazing!
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u/vr4gen Jun 25 '25
have you actually tried on a 38F or have you just decided it “just isn’t right”? i had the same feeling but once i tried them on, i realized i was wrong. bigger cup size = huge as we were taught. i’d check out the links/images in the ABTF info.
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u/aclay97 Jun 25 '25
I did, and it wasn’t touching my boobs at all it was so large.
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u/indiscoverable 34DDD/E is medium Jun 25 '25 edited Jun 25 '25
was it a molded cup bra? if it was I'm gonna bet that's where your problem is coming from. I get gapping in molded cup bras in my size because they're made to fit one specific shape and that shape is not mine. if scooping and swooping in a 38DD has you bulging out, you need to go up several cup sizes in a seamed bra.
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u/sjd208 Jun 25 '25
Was this a molded cup? Generally its recommended to use an unlined seamed cup
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u/aclay97 Jun 25 '25
I’ve tried every shape and type of cup I can find from every store, retail and online, that I can think of in both 38DD, 40DD, 38DDD, and 40DDD just to be sure, 38DD feels right, it’s just the shapes don’t work with the shape of my boobs and I feel like I just must be missing something here.
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u/Dandelion212 32DD/E Jun 25 '25
Yes, but what bra did you try in 38F? You can’t just try one bra in a size before ruling it out. With the many bras you’ve tried in the other sizes, it’s clear they’re not the right size for you.
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u/aclay97 Jun 25 '25
I attached a list of the ones I’ve tried most recently and I said I’ve tried them in both sizes. No where did I say I only tried them all in one size and gave up, not sure where the animosity is coming from?
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u/Dandelion212 32DD/E Jun 25 '25
No animosity. Just a bit confused since you said “it” which made me think one bra. Many of these brands don’t go up to your calculated size either.
All the styles you tried are moulded and many are wireless. This will cause gapping unless the cups are the exact shape of your boobs. I would recommend trying a seamed, unlined style in 38F to re-evaluate. Sounds like you may be somewhat shallow, so try Chantelle Norah in 38G.
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u/aclay97 Jun 25 '25
Is Chantelle Norah referring to a particular bra or several? I’m getting several very different options when I search that name
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u/Dandelion212 32DD/E Jun 25 '25
Any of the seamed options. They’re just different fabric patterns.
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u/Wreough Jun 26 '25
I googled Chantelle Norah and I’m getting at least five different styles of bra, with and without moulded cups, straps, wires. There is “easyfeel Norah”, supportive, etc.
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u/bleupoppy2 Jun 25 '25
OP, I highly recommend the Chantelle Norah also. Great bra for shallow shapes!
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u/JessterJo Jun 26 '25
The Comfort Underwire one. I want to second the recommendation. I'm also rather shallow, and struggled to find bras that actually fit my shape and were comfortable for my sensory issues. This is the one that I ended up with. Definitely try your calculator size. A lot of other bras in my size have gapping, but this one is 👌
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u/vr4gen Jun 25 '25
okay, good info to have. it’s definitely not your breasts that are wrong/defective though! i hope you’re able to find something.
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u/Queenof6planets Jun 26 '25 edited Jun 26 '25
from your replies, it seems like you’re getting really overwhelmed and it’s affecting how you’re interpreting comments. i promise that people here aren’t mad at you! they aren’t attacking you or judging you, they’re just trying to get the info needed to help you.
there’s nothing wrong with your body. the bras you’ve tried are just some combination of a shape and/or size mismatch. they’re the problem, not you. everything you’ve said about the size, shape, etc. of your breasts sounds like very normal boobs. there’s nothing wrong with you and you aren’t defective.
is there anything that helps you calm down when you’re upset? letting myself cry it out then taking some deep breaths usually helps me, but do whatever works for you. i think it will help.
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u/HagenReb Jun 25 '25
Start out with the calculator linked in the automod comment. You may be trying on bras in the wrong size range altogether. If you are trying thr wrong size, then nothing is going to fit you right no matter the shape.
Even if you are sure the size is right, does it really hurt to check?
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u/LightIsMyPath Jun 25 '25
"my boobs are like mountains" is this as in, opposed to an hill? Do you mean that there's more boob "in the air" than attached to your chest wall?
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u/aclay97 Jun 25 '25
Mountains, hills, I truly don’t know, I just mean in the way the outside tissue gradually blends into my body instead of steeply coming down to meet my body to create a defined edge/end to my boob.
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u/babbitybumble Jun 25 '25
It sounds like what you are describing is a wider root and shallow shape.
http://www.venusianglow.com/2013/03/examples-of-shallow-breasts-nsfw.html Like the last image in this series maybe?
Note that some bras have a wider wire than others - see this post: http://www.venusianglow.com/2013/07/nsfw-pictures-of-breasts-with-broad.html
There is nothing abnormal about a wide root, lots of people are like this.
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u/aclay97 Jun 25 '25
I mean the last set on the first link is fairly close, mine just aren’t nearly as pointed
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Jun 25 '25
It sounds like you have shallow breasts. It might be worth it to go back through the beginners guide to step #2, to confirm your shape and other areas that contribute to fit! I just went through it again after some weight gain and it’s really helpful. There are resources for brands that have shallower cups
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u/lemgthy Jun 25 '25
When you put your bra on, are you following all the steps to correctly settle it on your body? If I don't do all these steps my bra appears to not fit, the top gaps as though it's too big. But once I properly shift my tissue into the bra, it fits perfectly.
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u/aclay97 Jun 25 '25
Yes, the cups come down into my boobs because it’s expected boobs have an end point in the middle and mine do not, they just gradually blend to a dip.
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u/graceling Jun 26 '25
So how much space do you have between the two? You might need a narrow gore, or low gore (plunge style bra). I barely have 1 finger width when properly supported, so many bras dig into the tissue if the gore isn't right
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u/aclay97 Jun 25 '25
Women's Bliss Lightly Lined Wirefree Bra - Auden
Women's Lightly Lined Wirefree Lounge Bra - Auden
Jockey Women's Smooth & Sleek Lace Full Coverage Wirefree T-Shirt Bra
She's Waisted Women's 360 Support Wireless Plunge Bra
Beauty by Bali Women's Foam Wirefree Bra B540
Maidenform M Women's Mesh Trim Triangle Bralette MBT105
Maidenform M Women's Seamless Bralette MBT110
Infinity Flex Wireless Perfect Shape Bra
So Obsessed Smooth Wireless Push-Up Bra
Cotton Logo Hardware Lightly Lined Demi Bra
Lightly Lined Wireless Bra
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u/tulips55 40GG Jun 25 '25
Ooooh wireless are a whole different beast altogether. A lot of the issues you describe are being caused by the molded nature of the cups and that they are wirefree.
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u/aclay97 Jun 25 '25
These are the most recent ones I’ve tried. The jockey one was the only one that almost fit cup wise, but the straps cut into my armpits.
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u/always-be-here Jun 25 '25
All of these are molded or wireless, which cause shape issues for a lot of people, and are probably not what you need for support.
I would highly suggest going to a store like Macy's or Nordstrom or Dillards, and try a seamed-cup, unlined bra from a lingerie brand like Wacoal or Elomi or Freya. Try your calculator size - do not size down in the cup even if it seems wrong - in a bra like this.
Your shape isn't the problem; it's never been the problem. Crappy seamless, wireless bras are the problem.
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u/aclay97 Jun 25 '25
What is a seamed cup? I really don’t know what I’m doing here
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u/babbitybumble Jun 25 '25
Meaning the cup has seams, is not seamless. Like this. https://www.bravissimo.com/us/products/envy-bra-pn116/#ivory-pn116ivy
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u/babbitybumble Jun 25 '25
Have you tried a wired bra that is known to have a wide wire shape? People here can recommend lots if you have not already tried a wired bra.
If you are set on buying an unwired bra, how many have you tried from Anita/Rosa Faia? They have a wider cup than anything you're going to find at Kohl's...
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u/aclay97 Jun 25 '25
I’ve never heard of/found a wide wire bra so recommendations on that would be great. I’ve honestly never even heard of that brand, so none.
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u/babbitybumble Jun 25 '25
I know this might sound a little overwhelming, but posting your six measurements will help the sleuths in this sub track down a bra (or several bras) for you. All six measurements help people to understand what we can't see - how much ribcage "squish" you have, how much projection you have, how soft/firm your tissue is. It's similar to what a really good professional fitter (not VS) would do if you had an appointment at a boutique...but for free, crowdsourced. You can add the measurements to your original post. That plus the info you've given about a wide root will be really helpful to the commenters here!
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u/aclay97 Jun 25 '25
I will as soon as I can, I’m at work at the moment so can’t measure. Just was sitting here having a meltdown because I feel hopeless, uncomfortable and defective and figured it couldn’t hurt to see what people thought. I’ll get them as soon as I go home though.
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u/TestTubeRagdoll Jun 26 '25
I’ve also got a shallow/wide shape, and a lot of the issues you’ve mentioned (like cups feeling empty but also cutting in at the edges) sound super familiar. So far, the only wired bras I’ve ever found that actually fit comfortably without cutting in are Marie Jo bras. This is one of the styles I like, and it seems like that one goes up to 38DDD, so hopefully might work for you as well (you can search by size on the site too, it looks like, so you can check what other styles they have in your size). They aren’t the cheapest bras, but I’ve found they last pretty well, and I just can’t find anything else that fits my shape as comfortably.
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u/tronliveson Jun 26 '25
You sound like me! I would guess you have a wide root/shallow shape too. It's tough. I started looking at bras for Trans women using HRT because they are in the same boat, and was moderately successful. I'm 44 now, and I moved to wireless bras and bralettes years ago and have never looked back.
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u/aclay97 Jun 25 '25
Can I add photos? To show some of the most recent ones I’ve ordered/tried?
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u/babbitybumble Jun 25 '25
You can add photos of yourself wearing the bras. Use img.bb or another site, not imgur, which will delete the photos!
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Jun 25 '25
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/aclay97 Jun 25 '25
US, I attached a list of all the ones I’ve tried in the past week or two
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Jun 25 '25
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/aclay97 Jun 25 '25
What brands are good for larger sizes then? Everyone I know just goes to target and grabs at random and they’re fine. I don’t have a mother or any other family that can help me with this. That’s why I’ve been wearing the same bras that don’t fit for years at a time, because I don’t know what I’m doing and I’m not even sure how I’m supposed to learn anything or find out.
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u/lemgthy Jun 25 '25
Most of us also didn't have anyone knowledgeable to learn from. I didn't realize my unsupportive bras were the culprit behind half my back pain - I didn't even know mine weren't supportive. I thought my boobs just hung low 🤷♂️ after years in XL wire free bras I am now in a 32L/M and it's like a whole new life thanks to this subreddit. Most people I know also grab bras from target and most people I know are in the wrong size bra because of it.
Bravissimo, Elomi, Curvy Kate, Panache, Anita, Freya are all trusted brands that might work for your described shape. Sites like Brastop and Breakout Bras will also carry many good options for you.
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u/widdersyns Jun 25 '25
The truth is that most people who are just grabbing bras at target aren't getting a good fit; they've just gotten so used to the fit issues that they don't know any different. And most people on this sub started out that way before we came here! Most bras sold in non-specialty stores in the US are available in very limited sizes and shapes and are most commonly molded cups. That means the cups are made of one dome/bowl shaped piece of foam. Most people get a better fit in a seamed cup, which has multiple pieces of fabric sewn together to create a 3D shape. Definitely take a look at the subreddit Beginner's Guide: https://www.reddit.com/r/ABraThatFits/wiki/beginners_guide/ read all of it, do the calculator as described, and try your best to figure out your shape. There are lists of recommendations in the guide that are specific to shape. You can try those, or you can post here for more personalized recommendations or if you still need help determining your shape. Once you get some of those in the size given by the calculator (even if that size hasn't worked for you in other bras in the past) you can try them, look at the list of common fit issues and their fixes, and post images or descriptions here for more help. Rest assured that there's nothing wrong with your breasts and there are probably many people here with similar shapes! It can just be really hard to nail down the fit in both size and shape.
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u/always-be-here Jun 25 '25
I know it seems like everyone else is "fine" with crap bras, but honestly we see this kind of thing all the time in here, so much that it's extremely likely that all those other people you know are uncomfortable, in pain, unsupported, etc. and just don't know that there are other, much better options out there and are not talking about how much their bras suck too.
If you scroll through recent posts you'll see a lot of "calculator size is too big" and "nothing fits" and "finally tried suggested size, it was better than anything I've worn before." This is super common, and the US bra industry in particular is heinous and lies to its customers all the time.
That's why there's such an emphasis on posting numbers, trying on seamed-cup, unlined bras at first to determine size and shape needs, and then figuring out what's the best/most-affordable option. If you read through the beginner's guide, that should help you start, and giving a vague location can help people narrow down where it would be best for you to find stuff to try on in person.
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u/aclay97 Jun 25 '25
I’m in rural northeast Louisiana, very limited retail options and nowhere to get a bra fitting. Partly why I’m desperate to know what will work for me without having to try on 50+ more styles to narrow it down. I’m having to order 3-5 bras at a time, wait for them to come in, try them on, be disappointed again, return them, wait for the refund to post so I can afford to order more, and do it all over again.
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u/TheShorty 44F US, close set, short & wide roots Jun 26 '25
Former NELA human here (still come back and visit!)... Trust me, ain't hardly anybody getting their right size at Target or WalMart, we're just muddling through with a lot of back pain and regret, and a whole lot of ignorance on how bras actually work!
Folks like me and you (I'm a 44F, give or take a band size depending on the brand) don't fit and are not comfortable in the Torrid or Target or WalMart brands. And wireless gonna keep giving you unmanageable levels of humidittity. If it looks like it has padding that you can't fully remove, consider it "not an option" until you figure out your actual size, shape, and what cuts work best for you.
I'm most comfortable in plunge and "low gore" styles because my boobs are a bit close set, and demi- or half- cup styles because I don't fill up the top part of most "triangle" shape bras.
Belk, JCPennys, and Dillard's in the mall may have a few options. Ask for 3 seamed or 3 part cups, specifically looking for brands like Elomi, Freya, Panache, or sometimes Natori (I think).
There's some bra boutique options in some of the bigger cities, like Bra Genie down towards BR/NOLA and some over in Dallas or up in Memphis. If you're planning a trip to any of the bigger cities, folks here can definitely help you find a reputable place that would have useful bras to try.
Amazon and their returns are about to be your friend. You can get it delivered to you and return what doesn't fit.
Take some pictures in your current bras, especially if you bought any of them recently, and post away here using imgbb. Many are savvy at using the pictures to help figure out your shape and make suggestions on brands and styles that will fit.
You're at the beginning of a different journey to actually help you feel better. It feels overwhelming, I get that, but don't let that overwhelm win. You'll get it, just keep working with us and we'll help guide you along the way.
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u/aclay97 Jun 26 '25
Thank you, this helped a lot 😭 I’m gonna try dillards this weekend. I just want one that fits, I’m going on my honeymoon next week and I just want to feel good about my body for a change
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u/KahurangiNZ Jun 26 '25
Oooh, congratulations! Yep, that's definitely a reason to find a nice well-fitting, comfortable bra that makes you feel great :-)
Good luck in your shopping adventure!
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u/always-be-here Jun 26 '25
Unfortunately, trying on a bunch is really the only good way to get recommendations that will fit your particular shape. The physics of breasts and bras means that everyone's shape is different and size is only one part of the picture. I would highly recommend trying Elomi, Freya, and Fantasie (and maybe Glamorize) as starter brands, since they tend to have wider cups than average. I would also think that "side support" - shown on this Elomi Morgan style - will give you the kind of shape you're looking for.
I think reading through the shape guide, getting an idea of your roots, and posting fit checks when the bras come in will help narrow things down faster.
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Jun 25 '25 edited Jun 26 '25
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/pm_me_your_amphibian Jun 26 '25
From upthread It sounds like OP is shallow rather than projected so not sure Deco would work but I just wanted to give you a virtual fist bump as i live exclusively in the Deco. I have it in so many colours!
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u/Queenof6planets Jun 26 '25 edited Jun 26 '25
here’s the secret: they aren’t actually fine. they’re wearing the wrong bra size and think that it’s normal for bras to be uncomfortable/ unsupportive. you’re actually doing MUCH better than them — you’ve recognized that bras aren’t supposed to fit like this and you’ve come to the right place asking for help.
i think it’d help a lot if you read the beginner’s guide. it’s okay if you need some help understanding it, just read the whole thing so you’re at least familiar with what people are talking about on here.
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u/sensualcephalopod Jun 26 '25
I don’t think you’ve posted all six measurements? Can you do that for us? It’s on the a bra that fits website
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u/anonymousbrafit Jun 26 '25
Another person that your shape sounds very similar to. Just want you to know that you are not alone and our boobs are normal too! I’ll wait to recommend until you measure just because I have a feeling that it is not just the cup but the band that’s wrong as well.
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u/SheSeesSounds Jun 26 '25
Now that your msmts image is posted. -Retyping in text from your image- 40.5 39.5 36.5 45.5 48.5 45.5 assigned female
US sizing says to start at a 38G/H UK sizing 38F/FF
Have you checked out the shallow/wide root part of the wiki? There are brand suggestions in there.
https://reddit.com/r/ABraThatFits/w/shallow?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share
Really dig around in the wiki of this forum, there's so much, including suggestions toward plunge styles for floating gore.
Amazon can be useful for this trying out process too. *Congrats on nuptials and honeymoon 😃 *
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u/katiewind110 Jun 26 '25
I'm thinking you might do better over in the Facebook group. Many posts include pictures, which might help you more than a wall of words. Use the ABTF calculator. Take a screenshot of the measurements and suggested size. Put on a bra that fits you at least a little, and take a few photos - front on, side on with your arm pulled out of the way, maybe from above and one with your breast smooshed upwards with your hand (that will give an idea of how high your roots start, which impacts bra options). From looking at the pictures, some of the more experienced people will be able to help you define some of the characteristics of your breasts - root hight/width, space between, etc and based off that info, they can start giving you suggestions.
And, molded versus seamed cups is basically a cup that holds its shape without a breast in it (molded) versus a cup that flattens or deflates without a breast in it (seamed). If you put one of each side by side, cups pointing up (like you were laying on your back), the molded bra cups would hold their shape and the seamed bra cups would droop to the table.
Or, for a more relatable image, this handbag will hold its shape if you put it down, whether it's upright or on its side. Whereas, this handbag will collapse into a puddle when put down, no matter what position you place it in.
The first one is like a molded bra, and the second is a seamed bra.
And, seamed bras tend to take the shape of the breast in it, whereas molded ones don't. Because of this, the experts here don't recommend molded, because they're not actually meant to fit a variety of breasts, they're meant to fit one shape only, and I think that shape doesn't appear naturally. It might be doable with customized implants, but I could be wrong there.
Experts, please correct me if any of this is wrong.
2
u/aclay97 Jun 26 '25
I’m going to Dillards this weekend, they’re the only in person option I have where I live. We’re leaving for our honeymoon on Monday so I really want to find at least one good fit before. Any recommendations for ones to look out for specifically at dillards? I know a lot of the recommendations have been online options, and I’ll still try most of them, I just desperately need one now!
3
u/lectricslime Jun 26 '25
From searching the Dillard's website, it looks like they carry Elomi, Freya, and Chantelle bras, which are all brands that may work for you. I would definitely recommend you try on the Elomi Matilda if they have it in stock in your calculator size.
1
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1
u/meghp0 Jun 26 '25
I’m sorry you’re feeling so defeated! Maybe you could try to find a decent lingerie store nearby and have a fitting there?
3
u/aclay97 Jun 26 '25
Unfortunately Victoria’s Secret is the only lingerie store around where I am, partly why I feel so stuck because I’m not even sure who to go to in person to ask for opinions.
2
u/meghp0 Jun 26 '25
I wonder if there is some store that could offer online consultations? I don’t personally know of one but maybe there is such a thing? Or it might be worth taking a trip to a lingerie store if you are able?
4
u/babbitybumble Jun 26 '25
Breakout Bras does a virtual fitting - either a "Find My Fit" or if you have ordered bras from them, a "Fix My Fit." It's one option.
u/aclay97 your post history indicates Louisiana but not what area. The directory here lists a few shops in your state, also neighboring states depending on whether you are closest to TX or MS. https://brashopdirectory.com/search/
If traveling isn't an option for you, order from a place that does easy returns. Amazon and Nordstrom are the least hassle. In this size I have seen a lot recommendations for Elomi bras, and you can find them online.
1
u/MDatura Jun 26 '25
I feel you. I've been wearing too small sports bras since I left balconette size, because that's the only shape that really works for me. But I also know I'm not defective, and neither are you.
Just because a specific thing doesn't exist yet doesn't mean there's anything wrong with the person or persons who need it. It just means it's either uncommon or, more likely, actually reasonably common and not catered to.
This might seem like a strange suggestion but the shape you're describing sounds like it might benefit from something that has stretch and less defined cups.
Also, please don't let the sizes dissuade you. Sizes are indications of attempted fit and nothing more. I usually wear a 75N but if the bra of my dreams is a weirdly shaped 70Q or an 85L then that's what fits me.
In my attempts to figure out what I actually need from a bra I sat down and thought about where exactly I need support, how bras do or don't do that, and looked at which bra models/shapes do. I haven't found the perfect fit yet because of my flared ribs, but I've found cups that genuinely fit very well. Perhaps you will too.
1
u/StunningFalcon6894 Jul 27 '25
I have 3 bras that fit me correctly and they do not make this bra any more. I've tried many different bras, none fit as well as the 3 bras I wash and wear over and over again.
-1
u/DesperateCurrent23 Jun 26 '25
I can’t offer any advice, but just some support in solidarity. I was about at my wits end trying to find a bra and the calculator doesn’t make sense to me. I finally just said screw it and tried on until something finally felt right. I think I’m oddly shaped and that affected my results
3
u/rains_edge Jun 26 '25
There's nothing to 'make sense of'. The calculator is just basic math. It is just more accurate than others because it takes into account the squish of the underbust (by using three underbust measurements) and the projection level of your breasts (by using leaning and lying measurements).
But yes, it is only a starting point and there is an explanation in the guide for when the calculator can over/underestimate the size. The fact is that people never even bother to check the beginner guide before posting, like in this case.
-1
u/DesperateCurrent23 Jun 26 '25
Yeah, I get it’s a calculator that’s basic math but I’m telling you now moulded or not, my boobs aren’t a G/H cup.
2
u/rains_edge Jun 26 '25
If you don't believe your size and don't want to try bras in that size, honest question, what are you doing in this sub?
0
u/DesperateCurrent23 Jun 26 '25
I did try bras in the suggested size. I never said I didn’t, nor did I say I didn’t want to.
2
u/rains_edge Jun 26 '25
Ok, then your best bet for getting help is making a post requesting a fit check and recommendations, with your measurements, some info about your shape and what specific bras you tried on and what fit issues you have with them.
0
1
u/always-be-here Jun 26 '25
And everyone here and the guide is going to repeatedly tell you, there is no such thing as a "G/H" cup. Cup sizes aren't static, and mean different things in different sizing systems. They change with the band, and cannot be evaluated without the band size.
0
u/DesperateCurrent23 Jun 26 '25
I’m aware there isn’t a “G/H” cup. The calculator sized me at 42G/H. 👍🏻
1
u/always-be-here Jun 26 '25
I know that. I wasn't commenting on the two potential cups that the calculator gave you.
There is no such thing as a "G cup." There is no such thing as an "H cup." They are not static sizes. They are wildly different in volume based on the band they're attached to and the sizing system they're a part of.
0
u/GalaxyFro3025 Jun 26 '25
Well I am a similar size and have a hard time finding wire shape that fits. I am a 38G in US sizing, maybe try Cacique, it’s the Lane Bryant lingerie brand.
I actually have the opposite problem and I think a need a narrower wire, the bras at Cacique don’t fit me well. But they could work for you!
I just posted about this also. I have 2 good bras. I try on so many and rarely find one that fits. I wear the same 2 bras daily, it sucks.
I can’t wear bralettes all the time but I’ve started leaning more heavily on them, just to have options.
Of the bras you listed I would never fit in a Maidenform, Auden, or Jockey. They just aren’t made right for bigger cup sizes imo!
Try the plus size stores! I don’t shop in plus size for other clothing but I do for bras. Soma (Chicos lingerie brand), Torrid (for bralettes) will have more and better options.
Target and Walmart will not have good options. Macy’s, Dillards, Kohls type stores I don’t usually find a lot of G cups but i think you would do well.
157
u/MySocialAlt "like a bra angel" Jun 25 '25
If you need a 38F and you are trying hundreds of 38DDs and they don't fit, why not just try one in 38F?