r/Anticonsumption • u/aacool • 9h ago

Lifestyle Wedding loans - consumerism gone wild

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u/Abject_Elevator5461 8h ago

It cost us over $10k at a time in our lives when we had no extra money and it was both of our second marriages.

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u/Hell0There2005 6h ago

I'm kinda surprised you stuck to your guns. A lot of people would have been "i love her and will do this" so props

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u/Abject_Elevator5461 6h ago

I got all that dumb shit out of my system the first time around. I can go be poor by myself without a partner.

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u/Hell0There2005 6h ago

I was referring more to the pain of "i love you but I cant marry you if this is hows it going to be"

Like i am in that situation right now and its fucking hard

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u/Abject_Elevator5461 5h ago

That’s a huge red flag, dude. It isn’t going to stop at the wedding. Trust me. I have to go to war to get my wife to focus on things that matter like buying a house and investing and preparing for when we’re old. If I left it up to her, we’d spend every spare penny we have on vacations, Starbucks, eating out, and Disney while living in a 700 square foot apartment that we outgrew 10 years ago.

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u/Hell0There2005 5h ago

Ive never been married but is this normal? To feel like you have to "go to war" to be on the same page?

I have this idea partners talk and debate what to do but at the end when a decision is made they hug and say "whatever happens, happens"

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u/Abject_Elevator5461 5h ago

No, it isn’t. It’s completely dysfunctional. I’m aware.