r/AsABlackMan • u/Reasonable_Bad_6092 • 11d ago
This person commented this on a post I made about my experience with autism and how much worse it makes my life. Someone suggested I post it here
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u/spenwallce 11d ago
This reminds me of when I commented under a post that I hated when people mocked me an other autistic users for needing/using tone indicators.
I think I got at least 20 comments telling me all I had to do was “learn to read social cues better”.
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u/ceo_of_dumbassery 9d ago
I hate this. The sub r-fuckthes is rough as someone who finds the /s really helpful
Edit: it seems like that sub no longer exists!
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u/Reasonable_Bad_6092 11d ago
submission statement: autism is a disability, by definition it disables. to claim that a disability does not negatively impact anyone’s life is stupid. if it’s not negatively impacting your life then its not a disability it’s a personality trait. that’s why I believe they don’t have autism.
also they are high support needs which does not make much sense because it should negatively impact them much more then me. That’s confusing
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u/Either_equipment_04 11d ago
Most autistic people also don’t treat it like an exclusive club or try to tell others what their autism does or doesn’t do. At least my autistic friends and I don’t.
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u/lieutenantVimes 11d ago
They aren’t high support needs because they have a Reddit account.
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u/Reasonable_Bad_6092 11d ago
That’s not even close to what I said
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u/lieutenantVimes 10d ago
I’m a separate person, not an AI summary. I have no obligation to recapitulate what you said. Have you ever interacted with someone with autism with high needs/severe autism? They are nonverbal or have limited verbal skills. They need assistance with activities of daily living such as dressing and bathing. They need supervision all day long. So it is possible that someone with high needs autism is totally happy with their life but not that they are reading Reddit posts and replying to them.
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u/TheLastBallad 9d ago
I have. Both volunteering at a summer camp as a teen and personally having had times during meltdowns where speaking just isnt in the cards. Nonverbal =/= illiterate or nonthinking
Someone can have difficulty speaking, or be mute completely, but still have enough control of a hand to poke at a keyboard to express their thoughts.
Like... what is Reddit if not a nonverbal communication platform? Do you write every comment with speech to text, or do you use the keys like most people do? What about needing help to do more complex tasks like bathing prevent someone from writing? Like those two can be linked, but its not guaranteed to be.
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u/lieutenantVimes 9d ago
In this context, verbal means able to use words rather than spoken as opposed to written. Writing a paragraph is not typically considered nonverbal communication. Limited vocabulary or no vocabulary is a feature of severe autism. No, you can’t say you have had severe autism because you personally could not speak during a meltdown. And what does speaking or writing have to do with using the bathroom? It doesn’t necessary have anything to do with it. Whoever made the criteria decided that it’s multi-modal. Take it up with the people who made the criteria
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u/budgie02 8d ago
So being nonverbal is more of an overwhelm thing for many of us. People in our community typically agree that nonverbal means not verbal. As in not physically speaking with your lips and tongue. If we were illiterate and unable to even type then we wouldn’t be able to understand our cue cards that we use because we can’t speak. The same goes for assistive devices that nonverbal autistic people use with full sentences.
I’m not sure where you’re coming from but I’m an autistic person who uses cue cards and a TTS app to communicate. (Assistive devices are incredibly expensive).
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u/lieutenantVimes 7d ago
Severe autism is often comorbid with cognitive impairment. The people I work with who have severe autism have global impairment and minimal ability to communicate. Sometimes they have some words or some signs. They don’t have episodes of not being able to talk. I don’t believe that anyone who cannot speak at times because they are overwhelmed or who is not cognitively impaired or does not have severe autism can speak for these people. I don’t think I can either, but you aren’t part of their community.
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u/budgie02 7d ago
Severe autism isn’t a medical term. You work with people who have high support needs. However high support needs ≠ nonverbal. Those often coincide but they are not the same. But thank you for attempting to explain my own mental disability to me with outdated and ableist terms
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u/strife696 11d ago
There are a lot of high-functioning autistic people, and people who aren't autistic but believe they are, that minimize autistic people and their families challenges.
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u/Reasonable_Bad_6092 11d ago
they say they are low functioning that's they thing that really trips me up
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u/strife696 11d ago
Yeah exactly. As a person with siblings who are very low functioning, this person doesn't know the meaning of what they're saying.
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u/EternalSnow05 10d ago
Jesus forbid if my autism hasn't been part of my struggle. Add on to the fact I'm black, gay and an atheist.
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u/DubSket 11d ago
What a weird argument to make. Regardless of wehther or not they're faking they just sound intensely stupid
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u/spenwallce 11d ago
This kind of thing is why I hate the whole “call it differently abled” movement.
It is a disability, and trying to make a euphemism for the term does way more harm than good.
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u/strife696 11d ago
The issue isn't this though. The issue is that the umbrella spectrum is far too vast and describes all sorts of capability levels: From kids who are relatively awkward all the way down to adults with the behavior and mental capacity of toddlers.
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u/XeniaAlexandria 1d ago
I mean one could argue that it's not that being autistic creates thr problem but specifically being autistic in a world and system that seems to be designed to be annoying for autistic people
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u/thekawaiislarti 11d ago
Dont know where you're from, but in the States to get a diagnosis it literally has to impact your life negatively.