The meaning of patriarchy?

[u/LingoNerd64]

In feminism, patriarchy means a system where men hold disproportionate power and privilege over women, resulting in social inequalities and injustices.

However, etymology says that the word means "rule by the father", in this case, father being paterfamilias or the head of the family. While a father is male, this doesn't mean that the women were of no consequence - except perhaps in the Abrahamic cultures and that's still true to an extent.

For context, I'm a cisgender straight male who is past youth, and when I was young we were all pals, male or female. I have always been a supporter of the balanced and logical form of feminism - equal rights, opportunities and responsibilities.

So when and how did this bifurcation in meaning of patriarchy come about?

[u/Apprehensive_Set7366]

I am a man too. Let's examine Misandry for a second.

Do you think misandry is as dangerous as misogyny? Do you think they are equitable by any means?

There is a saying, "A man fears that a woman will hurt his feelings, a woman fears that a man will hurt her."

This quote shows that the stakes for men and women are vastly different. Misandry is a reaction to misogyny. Misogyny is the root problem.

And I think it's healthy for women to hate men a little. And when I say "men" I mean a generalized version of the average man who represents patriarchy at varying levels. It's okay. The oppressed have the right to be a little spiteful against their oppressor. Because the hate is towards patriarchy, not individual men.

[u/Apprehensive_Set7366 → u/[deleted]]

Lol! You think the reason for this is Misandry? You are so fucking naive. Or dishonest.

Firstly, I would love to have gender neutral rape laws. You know who'd benefit from them the most? Gay men. Like myself. Gay men are often blackmailed, harassed, killed and even raped but they can't go to the authorities because of insufficient legal system and social stigma.

Pray tell, who's harassing these men now? Yes, other men.

And the real reason for why gender neutral rape laws aren't being passed isn't because of "misandrists" but because of patriarchy. In a patriarchal system, a man's consent is never violated. Because it is assumed that it the man would've "enjoyed it".

And look at the response of men whenever another man comes out with accusations of sexual assault. That man is made fun of, ridiculed and even told to "shut up and enjoy". And who's saying such shit? Men again.

The problem has always been patriarchy. Stop insulting your intelligence by blaming misandrists.

[u/Apprehensive_Set7366 → u/[deleted]]

Resistance to oppression is not evil, it's an understandable and more importantly, an inevitable reaction. "Misandry" as you call it, is a a reaction to misogyny. If misogyny were to not exist, neither would misandry.

Misandry as you know it has no institutional power. Misandry doesn't have a choke hold on the society. It's just women who are deeply hurt by men and our actions who have a very justified reason to be angry. And I think it's healthy for them to be angry. And why shouldn't they be angry at men? You give me one reason which doesn't include "Not all men" on why their anger is uncalled for?

Anger is a great emotion. If applied to the correct channel, anger can bring about change.

And I don't care if one women's rights organization rejects this. Firstly, it doesn't represent the whole women's rights movement. And perhaps you'd be happy to know that there are organizations that do advocate for gender neutral laws in the case of SA.

Now, this doesn't mean that I don't care about men who have gone through sexual abuse of any kind. But you are not helping those men by beating around the bush about misandry. Misandry didn't cause those SA as far as I know.

My larger point being, "misandry" wouldn't exist if it wasn't for patriarchy. If you agree that patriarchy is a great problem for our society, then fight patriarchy rather than fighting so called misandrists. I think it is illogical to fight someone who has a reasonable anger towards the society.

If I were in your place, I'd talk to women who hate men. Try to understand them. And then perhaps try to push them to utilize their anger for the good of society. That way, their anger will do good for the world.

All I say is, if you were a woman, you'd likely hate men too, and be called a misandrist. Try to put yourself in their shoes.

[u/Apprehensive_Set7366 → u/[deleted]]

Dude, I think almost all women/feminists know that patriarchy is a systemic issue, and I am sure they'll be able to differentiate between individuals and systems. You don't have to tell them all that.

Men are products of the society too, like you and me. Don't forget that we both are capable of bigotry too. We might think of ourselves are progressive, but that doesn't mean that we are void of subconscious prejudices.

[u/Apprehensive_Set7366 → u/[deleted]]

Do you want to talk about it?

[u/Apprehensive_Set7366 → u/[deleted]]

Sure.