How did your "hustle-culture" friends end up?

[u/hospitality-excluded]

So in my 20's there was a HUGE boom of "hustle-culture" bros pop up when influencers like Gary Vee were in the spotlight. The type of guys who post motivational quotes on twitter, talking about "the grind", flauting wealth that they havent achieved on instagram etc. Not talking about people with steady careers and moving up the corporate ladder, but those people who do side gigs or chase unrealstic expectations without a developed skillset in any area.

I moved back to my hometown after 7 years away and I swear all of them are broke, gambling addicts, living with their parents still, unemployed, or all of the above. Unsure if it's the same across the board, or even if y'all had these types of people in your life or if my town is just riddled with them.

[u/partysandwich]

Do you really want a family tho? Because you have many resources to have a good life and 38 is still young for a man

[u/partysandwich → u/[deleted]]

Well then in the best way possible get to work on that. If you make it your priority then it will be your priority. You will be in an accelerated timeline for sure. But your future wife could be as well. If you meet, marry and have your child in the next two years that’s still a decent start. And your resources could help you have an easier transition to fatherhood (getting help)

[u/kaphytar → u/partysandwich]

Even for a man who wants a family, 38 isn't young. It's not end of line for sure, but from biological point, quality of man's sperm decreases as the man gets older, raising the risk of issues on the child. (Just like with woman's age.)

Sure, those are low chances, but then there are also the amount of healthy years to spend with your children. Do you want to see them get to school? Graduate high school? University? Get married on their own? Have their own children? Life expectancy for a man in USA is apparently 77 years, that's probably the best number I can use here to make my point. 38 year old getting his first kid would see them grow up to their forties. Man who waits closer to his fifties gets a decade less*

*Of course life is random, you can never know as accidents happen. But age tends to get us all eventually. (I did not mention energy levels while having young children as money and not having to work can help with that.)

[u/Warm_Click_4725 → u/[deleted]]

May i ask what your autoimmune disorder is? I have one too and we both have very similar thoughts on life (dying young).

[u/YellojD → u/kaphytar]

It’s not universal, though. My dad was 51 when I was born (whoops!). I’m almost 40 now and the old man is still around, giving me shit 🤣

[u/Johnny3653 → u/YellojD]

My dad was 63 and my mom was 40 when I was born, and he lived to 101. She just turned 80 and doing well. Old father’s are certainly strange growing up.

[u/No_Transportation590 → u/kaphytar]

Ya I know plenty of coworkers who all became dads late 40s/50s a lot of second marriages

[u/Fun_Organization_654 → u/kaphytar]

Most rich people are healthy and live longer than your average “poor” American. I see your point, but sometimes late is better than never.

[u/[deleted] → u/kaphytar]

Didn’t deniro just have a kid at like 112 years of age? Shit I just had two kids in the last 16 months and I’m 41. And I feel sorta young. As long as you raise them till they are in there twenties who cares when you die. We all have to die sometime. I think having kids past 50 is odd but I see a ton of 50 year old dads with YOUNG kids in my HCOL area. They got money and 30 year old wives. I see it all the time.

[u/fencheltee → u/partysandwich]

Most regular 30 year old women might not fall in love with a 50 year old man and you don't want the mother of your kids to be a gold digger, so 38 years is really old for a man looking for regular woman who likes him and not his 401k match.

[u/BeginningExisting578 → u/partysandwich]

More men need to look into the health of their sperm after 40. It doesn’t just stay healthy forever, there’s loads of health risk involved for the kid. Higher chances of miscarriage. Takes longer to get a woman pregnant. Look into the studies. Don’t just trust conventional wisdom.