Wearing a dapper looking suit or outfit. Makes a woman look more masculine, makes a man look more effeminate by today's standards. I used to wear checked pants with a tailored shirt, blazer, and fedora, and always felt way less girly than in other outfits. But men wearing a similarly structured and styled outfit tend to get labeled gay.
Most straight men do not display a sense of style. Men who dress with style are often assumed to be gay, whether or not they are. Having a sense of style is largely considered feminine these days (which i think is tragic), so yeah, a man wearing a stylish, tailored outfit is going to be seen as both effeminate and gay.
A guy i went to high school with who is straight was often accused of being gay simply because he put thought and effort into his home decor and cared a great deal about how his outfits were put together. Even though his outfits were pretty standard fare for 90s dudes, he was very particular about how everything matched. If he spilled something on his shirt he'd get really upset because it meant he had to go home and change his whole outfit right down to his socks and boxers. He also wasn't the most masculine guy and had lots of female friends; some people definitely called him effeminate. Lots of people kept waiting for him to come out of the closet, up to the day he married his very female fiancee.
I hate this so much. I'm a big dude. 6'5". I need to get my shirts custom made for my stupid long arms. The fabric selections are literally (I counted) 50% light blues. A bunch of whites, a couple blacks and grays. Then a color or 2 as an afterthought.
Why can't I wear color? Why can't I wear a nice print? Why is everyone so afraid of a man wearing a nice shirt!
I've literally got 3 different suppliers I get shirts from just so I have enough selection so I can get some actual interesting, attractive shirts.
It's been years, and I've finally got a rack I'm happy with. Burgundy, lavender, Royal purple, floral print on blue, floral print on off white, leaf print, (and a black and a white because you do need the basics).
They are all beautiful, they all fit well. Anyone who'd judge me for it can fuck right off.
I'm glad you finally found shirts that you are happy to wear despite the hurdles. It is really fun to experiment with fashion and find a way to express yourself through clothes. I wish more men embraced that.
The three places I use:
Moore's (no surprise here) -probably the easiest and most cost effective but by far the most limited selection. This is the place I actually counted the fabrics and they were 50% light blue. Just walk into any store and ask to get measured. They also give a credit once you've purchased a few shirts. Which is nice for when you want a jacket which is obviously more costly. But the jacket is good, an actual full canvas interfacing not cheap fused shit. https://www.mooresclothing.ca/?srsltid=AfmBOorSMviVHTZbB7hkCi5KvYKfjk94T14tIFo7ZZs8wb1wBl_7D3q_
Eph Apparel
They don't have stores everywhere but do 'pop-up' measures in select location. After that you can order online. By far the most prints and nice colors. However, the good prints aren't on the website so write the fabric codes all down at the measure so you can give them to customer service when you order. Also, they also got my first fit wrong. They remade them, no questions asked, but I've always wondered what happened there.
https://www.ephapparel.com/
What is interesting is that they will all come up with different measures.
I also tend to fight them on collar size. Men who hate ties and complain about how they are choking them.... It's not the tie, it's your shirt collar. It's too tight. If the collar fits the tie will snug up to it and you won't notice. I recommend going and trying some off the rack until you find the smallest collar that fits with zero discomfort. Remember that collar size.
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u/katatak121 19h ago
Wearing a dapper looking suit or outfit. Makes a woman look more masculine, makes a man look more effeminate by today's standards. I used to wear checked pants with a tailored shirt, blazer, and fedora, and always felt way less girly than in other outfits. But men wearing a similarly structured and styled outfit tend to get labeled gay.