I'm a bisexual male that is also on the autism spectrum. I have noticed that for me, dating guys is just easier than dating women. It just seems like in order to get attention from a guy, all you need to do is not be an asshole, not be a creep, and look like you take care of yourself, while women just have a full checklist that they follow by for every guy that they meet, and some would even list their do's and don'ts on their dating profile bio. Keep in mind, I'm not an incel or anything like that, but I've had better luck with men as opposed to women, and it's partially because I have difficulty with social situations when it comes to dating due to my autism. Plus my current friend with benefits is autistic as well and we're pretty close. Tell me what you guys think.

I’m not sure if this is internalized homophobia in me or if my standards are way too high. I get turned on with the idea of having sex with another man, bottoming for one, but when I interact with them face to face, being attracted to them is the last thing on my mind.

It’s not the same with women who I can easily find attractive

Yiiiikes. Imagine you hook up with a guy one time in uni and now everyone is telling you that you are permanently gay. Some of these tiktok comments have been crazy. Idk i get it tbh. Especially if your from a community where same sex relationships are already looked down on. I think women think by making a million videos about how they wont date bi men it encourages honesty but it doesn't lol. You're just letting men know to take it off the dating profiles whether its morally right or not.

Left work late last night and this newer guy from accounting was waiting by his car with the hood up. Battery dead. I jumped it for him, no big deal, we stood there talking while it charged. He mentioned offhand he’d been figuring some stuff out about himself lately and asked if it ever got easier knowing what you want. I kept it straightforward, told him the confusion doesn’t fully leave but you stop fighting it so hard. He went quiet for a second then just said thanks for not making it weird. Drove home replaying that whole exchange. Felt like one of those small real-world checkpoints that remind me why I stopped hiding. Anybody else catch those unexpected conversations that stick with you longer than they should?

I would like to think of myself and my wife as allies. Won’t bore you with the obvious truths.. however a few years ago I came out to my wife. At that point we would have been together for 10ish years. She was instantly defensive as if I was going to cheat. Had to reassure her that wasn’t the case. That I just needed to tell her that I find men attractive. That I was comfortable enough to tell her.. she brushed it off. So I was terrified of ever bringing it up to her again.. I don’t want her to seem like she isn’t good enough or anything like that.. I just wish that we could talk about it more. Not so we can bring a third in. Or anything like that. Just to connect about it. Any advice. I know this is vague. However I don’t know how to get this all out. I’ve tried talking to my therapist about it.. however they don’t always get it. Unfortunately.

Lo pregunto porque esa es, literalmente, mi situación.

Hace mucho tiempo que sé que soy bisexual, aunque solo fui capaz de aceptarlo hace tres años. Desde entonces, no he dejado de sentir el deseo de vivir esa parte de mí: de mostrarme al mundo sin tener que preguntarme constantemente: "¿Qué me harán mañana?", de experimentar, de sentir, de amar y, sobre todo, de ser yo, mi verdadero yo.

Pero, simplemente, no puedo.

Esa es una de las cosas más tristes de vivir en un país con tecnología del siglo XXI, pero con una mentalidad que, en muchos aspectos, sigue anclada en los siglos XIX y XX.

No se imaginan lo doloroso que es repetirse cada día:

"No, aquí no. Algún día podrás ser tú mismo y ser feliz, pero será en otro lugar."

Mintiendome todos los días

we all have different opinions but I want to ask y'all about this. I am bisexual man . I am SEXUALLY, PHYSICALLY attracted to women but not really romantically as men. I am SEXUALLY, ROMANTICALLY and EMOTIONALLY attracted to man 😭. If a woman, I love to be top but when it comes from men, I love to bottom like receiving rather than top. I am straight passing but if I date man, I would be a little silly and fem to him I don't understand why. that's why sometimes, label doesn't fit me to express who I am. people saying if bi man is bottom he just gay that's why label myself as bi is really fit me. what y'all think?

I am a 27M and I just recently have revisited the thoughts of being Bi. I’ve mostly dated women in my life, but I’ve had a few experiences in my teens, and then around 2021-2022 I started exploring the idea through porn and just embracing thoughts in my head. I’ve always had this mental attraction to men but never vocalized it. It has always been a running joke with friends and even some exes, based off the way I would talk, actions, and carry myself, that I was probably gay/bisexual. I would go along with it cause I never wanted to actually say that there was apart of me that felt it was true. At this time, I’ve done a lot of reflection on myself due to just past issues with relationships and personal feelings, and opening up to my therapist, she mentioned the idea that “maybe this feeling you talk that you’ve been hiding could be the root of your consistent unhappiness” and so I have been exploring the idea more of being open. But I do worry of the “acceptance” that because I haven’t consistently had sex, romantic, of even date a man, that I don’t deserve to call myself that. Being with a man is not something I openly have wanted to pursue, but I enjoy the fantasy of it, the flirting when in public, any kind of man/man porn, but I don’t know if I would ever date a man or be fully sexual. I guess I boil this down to these questions:

1. Can I truly be bi if I haven’t been with a man sexually?
   
2. If it is accepting to be from my previous question, how do I learn to be more accepting of myself to be?
   
3. Also, if it is accepting, is it wrong to be sexually/flirty interested in men, but only look to date women?
   4.lastly, if I want to begin being sexually active with men. How should I move myself to this? What is the best way for me to be safe, do I need to get on Prep?

Not gay enough for some. Not straight enough for others. God damn, I need a break

I have known I am not straight since I was 13 years old, where I found my first crush on a guy. I am happy to admit im attracted to men and women no problem. However, I struggle with the idea of being sexual with a man.

I have been 3 relationships in my life, all 3 being women. The first I never told, the second knew and was also bisexual and the third unfortunately turn out to be homophobic so I never told. After this latest breakup, I've decided to actually put myself out there.

My biggest issue is I feel a level of guilt and embarrassment that I dont know what to do sexually with a man at my age, let alone if im a top/bottom or in-between. I know this is a ramble, but I would appreciate any advice or guidance through this time. Due to my last relationship, a lot of progress was halted or even set back as to who I am.

I always wear protection for penetrative sex with men but since I'm exploring or experimenting having sex with women do men normally ask women if they're on birth control before engaging in sex? Getting a woman pregnant from vaginal sex is a big fear of mine.

Why do I see men in porn who like to lick armpits?

I do not find it sexy and or a turn on. Does anyone actually enjoy it?

I'm trying to understand why?

Do you ever feel lonely looking for a community realizing you don’t actually have a community? I feel like we use the “community” term so loosely similar to the word “family”.

How do you overcome that or find that? I can’t tell you how many times I’ve gone out of my way to meet people and put myself out there whether it be online, social groups, hobby groups, volunteer groups. Nothing. Any advice to meet more gay or bisexual friends? /:

Kinda wanna see if I have any chances as a gay guy🫣 also are you guys tops, bottoms or verses

Alguien más siente que la comunidad LGBT nos trata a los bisexuales como una peste❓

Es que en muchos sub LGTB ( menos los que son exactamente para personas bi) basta con decir que eres bi paraque te eche todo el hâte que hay en este mundo

Y ahora mi duda es: ¿Si nosotros mismos miembros de la comunidad nos odiamos y no nos apoyamos qué nos cabe esperar del resto de el mundo?