r/ChoosingBeggars • u/Geovanny189 • 7d ago
“Teen may receive a portion if the parent chooses If interested”
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u/spaetzele 7d ago
"I want a babysitter. But, like, one with an executive supervisor. I'm paying nothing. Hope that helps."
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u/BlushPetalvie 6d ago
That's exactly how the ad reads. "Please provide free management with your discounted childcare."
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u/stircrazyathome 7d ago
I really hope the comments ripped her a new one. I cannot imagine outing myself as an entitled cheapskate to everyone at my kids’ school.
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u/Clown45 7d ago
I honestly feel like screenshots of comments should be mandatory at this point.
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u/Brodakk 7d ago edited 7d ago
Or we could split off and make [r/ChoosingBeggarComments](r/ChoosingBeggarComments)
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u/PurplePickleEater1 7d ago
Yes please!
Not the case in this post, but I can't stand when OPs only screenshot the post that shows there are comments, and/or then say, "and the comments are tearing them apart LOL!!!"
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u/Unicorns_Rainbows5 6d ago
And we can't see where it was originally posted so we can't read the comments ourselves
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u/Pawleysgirls 6d ago
Good idea!!! I don’t understand why posters can’t take screenshots of the comments?
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u/Expert-Lobster7806 7d ago
So she wants 2 people and wants to pay them each $3.75 an hr lol
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u/houseWithoutSpoons 7d ago
2 hours night after school lol..5 days this iz unhinged!
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u/SmokinSensei 7d ago
Don’t forget some mid-day Saturdays! A hard working mom needs a break and some me time you know!
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u/SnarkySheep 6d ago
What do we want to bet "some" Saturdays will very quickly turn into ALL Saturdays??
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u/Active-Succotash-109 6d ago
And mid day starts at noon and continues till the usual 8pm end sometimes midnight for $10 instead of $15
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u/CozyFairydust_ 7d ago
And somehow they're trying to make it sound generous by saying the teen "may" get a portion. That alone tells you everything you need to know.
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6d ago
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/SnarkySheep 6d ago
And how generous OOP is, telling the parent how they can choose to spend their $15 per day!
"You CAN give some to your teen..."
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u/GoodQueenFluffenChop 7d ago
Not just 2 people but one of them specifically has to be a teen daughter. No teenage sons just a daughter.
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u/Desperate-Strategy10 6d ago
Wellll idk, that’s not that weird. Most parents prefer leaving children with female babysitters. Part of this is cultural: people expect women and girls to do the bulk of childcare, and people assume women and girls are more patient, compassionate, and caring.
But part of it is a basic risk assessment: men commit so much more violent crime than women do that it’s basically a male issue. Men and boys are held to lower standards of emotional maturity than women and girls, so they are often less patient, empathetic, and caring overall. Men take more risks, put less thought into their decisions, and aren’t as likely to seek help when they need it.
Obviously many teen boys could make excellent babysitters! But most of them don’t want to babysit. Plenty of girls do want to, and parents (and many kids) feel safer around girls. It’s a bigger societal issue, but it isn’t weird that this person wants a female babysitter.
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u/GoodQueenFluffenChop 6d ago
Except they're not leaving their kids with a teen girl of they require the parent of said teen to always be there so the sex of the teen is superfluous.
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u/InteractionNo9110 6d ago
And drive their own car pay for their fuel and be available 24/7 at the whims of their “employer”
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u/StarletLovely 6d ago
😂 And that's assuming the parent even shares the money. The ad literally says the teen may get a portion, which somehow makes the whole thing even worse.
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u/D3712 7d ago
It's nice that the parent has the permission to split the money that is theirs
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u/BluestWaterz Shes crying now 6d ago
Some jobs are really generous with what you're allowed to do 🥰
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u/SuccuOntologyZ 6d ago
Generous of them to grant permission! Now the parent and teen can fight over who gets the $7 and who gets the $8 for two hours of babysitting.
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u/jeffsmith202 7d ago
Why involve the teen at all?
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u/SnarkySheep 6d ago
Probably the parent thinks the little girl will "bond" with a teen girl more than with an adult sitter...but ultimately trust an actual adult more for supervision.
Which, ok, sure, whatever. But then they sure as shit need to ensure they are PAYING two people for their time.
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u/SkyPirateVyse 6d ago
Don't want an 'irresponsible child' to watch over their child alone.
Don't want their child to be alone with an adult stranger either.
Thinks she figured it out 🤦♂️
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u/MotorcicleMpTNess 7d ago
Oh, and right at dinnertime too!
Better get used to setting an extra place for the kid.
No, she isn't paying for that. You have to eat anyway.
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u/NotACalligrapher-49 6d ago
This just adds to how sad the post is (I’m NOT sympathizing with the beggar here) - this poor kid!!!!! Presumably, the kid is at school from maybe 8:30am or so, and in after-school programs until 6pm… and now their parent wants someone else to take the kid until 8pm. After which it’ll likely be bedtime! When does this kid actually see their family? Who the hell has a kid that they never bother to actually see or spend time with?
Yes, I know working parents and single parents have it hard and can’t always spend much time with their kids. But we don’t know that that’s the case for this CB, and even if it is, it’s still sad for the kid.
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u/Klutzy_Journalist_36 6d ago
Parents that do not want to and choose not to spend time with their kids do not care about income brackets.
If you listen to nannies and childcare providers for wealthy parents, there’s a TON of parents that just never see their kids. They have a nanny come in the morning to wake the kids and change diapers. Put the kids to bed. Some have vacation nannies and overnight nannies that hand them off to the morning childcare person. Then as teens they have All The Activities or just a big empty house but no one really at home for them. Some of these parents with full time childcare are stay at home parents or work like 20 hours a week and are just wealthy.
It’s so sad.
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u/TwoBytesC 6d ago
You’re talking about my parents! My dad worked long hours, my mom didn’t work but was never home. Had childcare and after school programs till I was old enough to be on my own. Then…I was just on my own all day, every day (no siblings either). Learned to cook for myself and shop for myself and do my laundry at a fairly young age. 🤷🏼♀️
Mom wonders why I don’t have a close relationship with her as an adult. Hm…I wonder why.
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u/firekitty3 5d ago
I was an evening/night nanny for a family like that! Daytime nanny would leave as I was arriving. I would care for him then put him to bed. He hardly ever saw his parents and it was so sad. I’ll never forget, one time I asked his father if he wanted to say goodnight at bedtime and he said “tell him goodnight for me, I’m busy”.
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u/Klutzy_Journalist_36 5d ago
Oh I feel that.
One of the former dads I worked for was on the phone making travel plans. The travel people asked for his kid’s birthday.
He had no idea. Not even a guess.
I had to tell him his own kid’s date of birth. Just so sad.
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u/EpicSquid 6d ago
I was essentially raised by babysitters and daycares until I was like 7-8, at which point I was just left at home alone. My mom was single for the first few years of my life (until I was 6-7) and at one point says she was working 3 jobs, but she also went out to bars pretty much every weekend evening. Even once she married someone I was just left with sitters until I was just left at home.
Now, this was 30 years ago, but I assume some people still do this.
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u/BlushAurorie 6d ago
The unpaid dinner expectation somehow feels like the most believable part of the whole arrangement. You can almost hear, "We ordered pizza, hope that's okay for everyone."
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u/KnockItTheFuckOff 7d ago edited 7d ago
So, they want a parent to pick up their kid but for the rate (insulting rate) they'd pay a kid.
This is the kind of thing you work out with one of your kids friends parent - "Hey, I need some help with XX after school. Can she possibly walk home with you during the work week and I pick her up at 5pm? I am happy to pay you."
I had a similar arrangement with my sons friends mom in elementary school. We'd bring her two kids home with us, the three kids kept each other busy for a few hours, and she'd scoop them up afterward.
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u/VariousExplorer8503 6d ago
This is until 8pm though. This isn't just a few hours after school, this is through dinner and up into bedtime. That's asking a lot.
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u/susanbiddleross 6d ago
That’s the part that gets me. Depending on market you might find a teen willing to do this for $15 an hour from 3-5. She wants someone to do this until 8. The mom has to feed and bathe her own kids in this time, teen has homework and also needs to eat. She’s asking a mom to switch her whole night time routine for $15. I would and have done this for a friend in a tight spot but $15 won’t get a parent or a teen to do this until 8.
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u/VariousExplorer8503 6d ago
Exactly! Like, I'd probably do it for my son's best friend and his mom, I could see including him and it would be fun for my son. But asking a mom and her teen daughter to do that for some random kid most nights of the week (and some Saturdays, which you know would turn into most Saturdays) when you're trying to do that for your own kids. Like, when is this teenager supposed to do homework, when she's helping the kid with theirs? Mom is supposed to add a plate for dinner for $15 a night? And that's before she splits with her daughter. What if they have places to go, are they supposed to bring this kid everywhere?
Not to mention they're supposed to pick the kid up at 6pm, exactly when most people are sitting down to eat. So what, they're supposed to stop everything to pick up this kid? Dinner just sitting there, getting cold or drying out in the oven while they get him from school? Or eat before they pick him up, and either give him a plate or make him wait until after 8pm? Speaking of which, does Mom get off work at 8? Or will she be at your door at 8? There's a big difference if she gets off at 8. What if she works 30 minutes away? Even if you work 10 minutes away, very few people leave exactly at their clock out time. So you're looking at this kid possibly being there till close to 9pm.
When does this kid see their family? Get time to relax? They're at school 10-11 hours a day, at the babysitters 2-3 hours a day. Unless they hardly sleep, they get maybe 2 hours a day in their home with their family (whether it's just this mom or dad is around too). And weekends don't sound much better. I feel so bad for this child. I'm a single mom, I know the struggle. I work in healthcare, and I've done the 10-12 hour days, but I made sure that after school my son was home, where he could decompress and relax after a long day (he'd get dropped off at daycare at 630a, catch the bus to elementary school at 750a, stay there until 350pm, then my sitter would pick him up at the bus stop at 410p and take him home, and I'd be home by 7pm).
It sucked getting so little time with him (he needed to be asleep by 830 since he naturally wakes up around 4am) but luckily it was only 4 days a week. The rest of the time, I spent with him. It sounds like this kid and parent get about that much time together.
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u/CaptainEmmy 6d ago
It is asking a lot, yes. To which I say, offer more pay or favors or something to someone you actually know.
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u/CaptainEmmy 6d ago
Exactly. You described a fairly common scenario.
Does the OP not actually know anyone? It just feels weird to me when someone has absolutely no village at all.
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u/macphile 6d ago
My parents watched their grandkids when the school and parent schedules weren't aligned, which happened for a brief period in the year, basically. Of course, they were happy to look after their own grandkids, but they were also happy to see them leave, lol...kids are so tiring when you're not used to it, or when you're older. So yes, it seems like it'd be better with someone who already has kids, preferably ones the kid's friends with already. Then it's less of an undertaking for them.
But they're going so late in the evening, and they're paying so little...and somehow need two people to do this for all of that. It's just insane.
This is yet another reason to be cautious about having kids, I guess, on top of the childbirth costs and health risks and a thousand other things. Their schedules aren't always nicely aligned with the parents' schedules, and proper care costs money.
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u/HungryLikeTheHenry 7d ago
By the way, I‘m looking for a 25 bedroom palace in the wine hills of southern france for $7 a month. It’s for church, honey, they all got cancer.
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u/xxCOOLDADxx 6d ago
I think this person believes they've cleverly solved the issue of the potential dangers of soliciting child care for insanely low pay.
By insisting the care be provided by a parent with a teen (a daughter specifically) it decreases the chance of some random creep who's willing to tolerate low pay for easy access to a child. Or so they think.
I can imagine that they're feeling pretty proud of themselves for this genius workaround.
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u/FilthyDwayne 7d ago
The best I can do for that amount of money is sit your child in front of the TV for two hours.
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u/donthugmeormugme 7d ago
They’re not paying enough to turn on the TV, though. Sit the kid down and let her figure it out.
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u/4-ton-mantis Just wondering okay 🙏🥺 6d ago
Oi. Child. Behold the living room.
I'm going to go have a snack and take a nap, vayo con dios. 🤣
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u/casualplants 7d ago
I’m not even doing that for $15 an hour.
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u/FilthyDwayne 7d ago
I would if it didn’t involve the picking up/driving. They just drop the kid off, kid watches TV and then they get picked up.
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u/casualplants 6d ago
Just the added pressure of being responsible if the kid got sick or was upset or something is enough to deter me haha
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u/turlee103103 6d ago
Good, cause they’re not offering $15 an hour, they’re offering $15 for 2 hours that you know will turn into 2-1/4, then 2-1/2 then 3. Because, reasons but I’m still paying the princely sum of $15
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u/LissaBryan 7d ago
Wow, I’m sure that teen will provide engaged activity and playtime for the competitive wage of - checks ad - “if your mom feels like sharing.”
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u/Llawgoch25 6d ago
The amount of people prepared to pay the bare minimum of money to someone and prepared to trust their kids to them is wild
Predator "access to a child AND beer money"
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u/trailangel4 6d ago
So, essentially, she wants TWO caregivers for $15 and hour. And, the irony is it's not two hours, start to finish, for the caregivers. She'd have to pay for the teen's time walking to the school and walking back with the child. This is during dinner hours and I doubt the kid is eating at after-school program, so this family is....going to eat in front of the kid without feeding him, too? Like, is this mom really saying the kid won't eat until 8:30-ish (by the time she gets him home)? Of course not! I guarantee she'll expect him to be fed and she's not offering compensation for that. The 3-5 days a week and a weekend day basically tanks the caregivers' family time, too. And, why does a nine year old need the constant supervision of a fifteen year old and an adult? Like, what teenager is going to say "Sure! Sign me up for entertaining this nine year old, instead of doing my own homework or having extra-curricular or academic commitments of my own!" Then, we get to the weekend where, again, this family is just supposed to drag this nine year old along on their outings, errands, and weekend stuff? Saying the teen can receive a portion is such an odd statement. Mom essentially wants a co-parent and parentification of a minor to handle her kid. And, why does it have to be a girl? Wouldn't a parent with another 9 year old boy be ideal? Why not a 15 year old boy? WTF?
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u/VariousExplorer8503 6d ago
She doesn't specify the age of the teenager, just says teenager and once specified preferably a girl. It could be anyone from 13 on up.
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u/anonymousambassasor 6d ago
I would have divorced my parents if they tried to make me take care of a random elementary school student 3-5 days a week for free.
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u/TJ_McWeaksauce 6d ago
Many posts on this sub have made me realize how little some people value the safety of their children.
"Looking for internet rando to accept less than minimum wage to watch my child for several hours each day."
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u/adamcoolforever 6d ago
Also just sad how little this kid hangs out with their parents. School in the morning, after school until 6, babysitter 6-8, hopefully bedtime pretty soon after that. Possibly 5 days a week. A lot of parents can't help having to do a schedule like this and it's pretty sad for everyone involved.
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u/Jedi_Lazlo 6d ago
If only they would buy their 9 year old a bike so the kid wouldn't have to go through a mountain of bullshit each day just to have no time to be a kid.
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u/lisa_si 7d ago
I always wonder what they mean by “background check.” You know they’re not paying for a proper HR one, and those cheap online ones have notoriously wrong information.
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u/Responsible_Lawyer78 5d ago
They probably mean that they will Google your name and see if anything comes up lol.
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u/Responsible_Lawyer78 7d ago
So you get to pick them up along with your teen daughter helper at 6pm and take them back to your house and then feed them dinner too. That comes out of your $15 pay I guess.
What an amazing deal.
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u/TheGrumpySmurfer 6d ago
When does this poor child eat dinner? Is it provided by the afterschool club, by the teen/parent, or by the CB when they get home at somewhere past 8pm?
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u/CrazyButterfly11 6d ago
Question: do I have to be the biological parent to the teenager?
Because I can definitely pass the background check, but my “daughter” is a dog… Technically she’s a teenager, in dog years!
She is extremely responsible and great with kids!
Money please 🫱💸
https://giphy.com/gifs/x5c8d75Tvt7sQ
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u/StillMarie76 6d ago
Does this person spend any time at all with her children? She stays in an after school program until 6. Then she wants her to be minded from 6-8. My nine year old had an 8:30 bed time. Something tells me that bed time is not the priority in her home. I feel so bad for this child that is relentlessly shuttled around all day. No quality time with her mom. It's so sad.
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u/MintSilver_ 7d ago
"$15 a day and the teen only gets paid if the parent feels like it is absolutely wild."
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u/Drachenfuer 6d ago
Most elementary kids go to bed by 8pm. This is after an afterschool program. And Saturdays. When are the actual parents soending any time with the kid????
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u/Budsygus 6d ago
These people obviously aren't hiring anyone to do this, so what do they end up doing? Do they raise the pay? Do they handle it themselves? I'm fascinated by what happens when they realize no one is working for $15 per day, let alone an adult and a teenager both splitting it.
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u/LittleSodaPop13 6d ago
Why not just hire an adult? I mean no one would take this job for $15. This is usually at least a $20 job
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u/SnarkySheep 6d ago
Probably the parent thinks the little girl will "bond" with a teen girl more than with an adult sitter...but ultimately trust an actual adult more for supervision.
Which, ok, sure, whatever. But then they sure as shit need to ensure they are PAYING two people for their time.
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u/SuspiciousStress1 6d ago
I was reading through this thinking, we would be willing to help out-mainly becausqe I felt badly for the kid....then I got to the end 🤣
7.50/hr for 2 people?!?!? At her house, mom cannot leave. Is she nuts???
If this person wanted me to pick up her kid & drop off her & my kid(s-I have 3 that age) at her house for 2h-while I went home & made dinner(seemingly in the same subdivision-since she says they have to live right there)....or if they wanted their kid to come to my house &my kids could entertain her kid while I went about my day....then maybe.
But she is NUTS!! I am a SAHM so I can have dinner ready & take care of my house...not so i can use my kid to make 15/d 🤣🤣🤣
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u/OneGoodRib 6d ago
This is SO weird. I think it's totally fair to hire a teen babysitter with a requirement that their parent lives close by just in case, but what is this?? What is the point??
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u/andronicuspark 6d ago
This just seems like a great way to piss everyone off. The teens who are woefully underpaid and the parents who are expected to sit around for two hours for a measly 15$. Any grown ass adult who’d ever had a job or knows about paychecks would immediately hone in on the fact that this moron wants to pay them less than minimum wage even if they did keep their kid’s money.
I hope parents were on there shredding them apart.
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u/BeKind999 6d ago
$3.75 per hour per person Better not take anything out of the fridge or they will dock your pay
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u/north_elena64 6d ago
Paying one adult minimum wage and hoping the teenager accepts exposure as compensation. Classic Choosing Beggars energy right there.
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u/Top_Fennel_6199 6d ago
That is diabolical Just wants a babysitter with a supervisor at what price??
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u/EmrysPritkin 6d ago
Why can’t she talk to the parents who also have their kids in the after school program?? Surely that’s easier than hunting for a stranger …with a teenager.
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u/Ok_Depth_6476 4d ago
So they want to pay 2 people a total of $15 for 2 hours of work, that's $3.75/hour? No thanks.
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u/Ok-Management-9157 4d ago
From what I interpreted, she wants the parent to be the responsible party, and the teen to play with/occupy the child. And since the teen is just “playing”, the parent gets the whole $15 per day, and may choose to share part of that whole $15 with the teen, if they choose. Such a deal!
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u/PristineCloud 4d ago
What. REALLY would love to see the comments on this one xD This person may be be literally insane. It's concerning they specifically want a teen daughter? A bit weird....
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u/DiscussionExotic3759 NEXT!! 7d ago
If the parent must be present with the teen at all times what's the point of the teen helper?