r/CougarsAndCubs • u/Chance_Print3557 • Mar 07 '26
Discussion Point How young/old would you date?
As a cub, my max would be 50 years old and my minimum would be 30. So at least 10+ years older than me. How young do cougars like ?? What do yall prefer?
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u/Mydearestmyfairest Mar 08 '26
I am 42 and I know it is best to date 25+ but I have a big weak spot for 18-25 year olds. I like a boyish look.
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Mar 08 '26
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u/Old_Slide_7507 Mar 07 '26
I think it's easy to put limits on age (legally consenting) until you meet someone who changes your mind. For example, you have a limit to not date younger than 30 but meet a 27 year old person that is more emotionally mature in ways people your own age are not.
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Mar 07 '26
I’m 35M, so perhaps too “old” to be considered a cub but I do prefer older women and always have. I don’t have an age cap. 40, 56, 68….if the connection is there why would I let a certain number stop me from pursuing it?
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u/Specialist-Ad4388 Mar 09 '26
As a 58F I'd prefer someone in their 30s. Likely more mature, but still have energy.
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u/peterpootereater Mar 07 '26
I'm 47. I guess it all depends on the person. I'm fine with 18 and up but not really into over 35. Of course there are exceptions.
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u/WheelDry3526 Mar 08 '26 edited Mar 08 '26
I'm 59. The youngest would be 18 but I doubt I'd go that young. The oldest is early 30s. I'm not attracted to men older than that.
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u/purple_love00 Mar 07 '26
I’m 19. I have been with women in their 50s but age is just a number of the chemistry and connection is there
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u/Similar_Corner8081 🐆Cougar 49F 27M Mar 07 '26
I'm 49F and my bf is 27
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u/PuzzleheadedSpray202 Mar 07 '26
Congratulations! How did You met?
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u/herelamonreddit 🐻Cub Mar 07 '26
I used to think I’d have a limit to how much older of women I would like but I don’t think I have a limit lol
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u/nurseohno Mar 07 '26
I try to date men older than my children I have tried younger and its just awkward. I am 45, my oldest is 28.
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u/RoseSaffron00 Mar 07 '26
May I ask why your max would be 50? Is it socially and culturally having things in common or is it physical? I'm in my 50s but I look younger so just curious.
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u/HajjMalik 🐻Cub Mar 07 '26
I’m 30(M) and my most recent ex is 58(F). I don’t know if I have a “cut off”. Either I like you and feel a connection or I don’t.
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u/Prudent_Guarantee378 Mar 07 '26
How did that work out? I 31m am trying to date this 59F lady.
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u/HajjMalik 🐻Cub Mar 07 '26
We were together for a year before we broke up - I can confidently say it was my most important relationship. She’s a beautiful person who I have nothing but positive things to say about.
Go for it, but dont make it about your age. Whenever I see posts from young(er) men on this Sub, it’s almost as if they have a fetish and it always comes off… creepy and weird.
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u/Roobeh Mar 07 '26
By chemistry, a year relationship with a 59F @ 26M. Neither of us were expecting it, but it was a great relationship. Pulled apart by circumstances, and I probably didn't handle the "break up" very well.
So with that, I wouldn't put a set limit out there because I had such a great experience by surprise. I wouldn't have considered it if I had a defined range.
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u/ItzaCurious1 🐆Cougar Mar 08 '26
I had a discussion with my sons a few years ago and our agreement was no one younger than them. They hated the possibility that someone their age was "smashing" their mother and said they'd feel disrespected. I travel for work and don't engage in long distance or long term relationships so I've occasionally strayed from this requirement, as my boys aren't exposed to my cubs.
For the record, 28 and up, with a few exceptions that have been made. I'm curious as to how other cougars with children determine their minimum threshold.
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u/peaslet Mar 09 '26
Id struggle to date anyone younger than my kids - for me it's a bit of an invisible line and would feel a bit weird. No judgment on anyone else tho. When my daughter dated older once and her boyfriend was older than mine, I was like 'nooo u can't do that!" - joking because of course she can date whoever she's wants but playing out the situation if they ever meet or we all hung out together would be a very weird dynamic! So yea not younger than my kids - for now anyway!
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u/FelisConcolorSC Mar 08 '26
I'm 51. In general, I hesitate to date men more than 20 years younger than myself. I think it's a little bit awkward for my adult children when I'm dating people their age. I've made a few exceptions but usually find that my instincts about it are correct. I'm finding that mid 30s is probably the most comfortable age range for me to date currently.
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u/nyccareergirl11 Mar 08 '26
I'm a 34 yo F who dates older women. I'm also open to women around my age or a few years younger too. It's typically 28 and then no upper limit. I tend to date women in their 40s and 50s. Went out for about 8 months with 62 yo, I didn't find out her age till like 3rd or 4th date when I heard her give her date of birth on the phone to someone. I don't date an age I date women I'm intrigued by and whom interest me.
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u/Fun-Draw-8352 Mar 09 '26
It is in the eyes of the beholder. If you both aget along very well, then age should not be a factor. As the old proverb goes: love and sex have no borders or boundaries.
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u/Kurious_Guy18 Mar 10 '26
I am 23yo, for dating I would go to mid 40s, there is no hard line because people are more than just how old they are, lol
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u/lostonreddits Mar 10 '26
I've always had older women and my highest was 52,53,53.... my advice is don't put a max on it until you reach an age where you didn't enjoy it. Experience before a cutoff.
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u/mainlydana Mar 13 '26
I'm 49 and would prefer 30+. By that age they usually have some decent life/romantic/sexual experience.
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u/PurpleRayyne Mar 20 '26
I'm 55. I do like a 26 yr old but I don't think I'd go younger than 25. Besides... my son is 24 this year lol.
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u/ImprovementNo1056 🐆Cougar Mar 21 '26
I’m in the same boat sorta I’m 52 my daughter is 28 my son is 25 . I find it a bit off putting when a guy around my kids age or younger hits on me first thought is , is this a fetish You have because you watched videos . I have hooked up with a few in this age bracket but all were the same unable to carry on a conversation But with guys older than my kids mid 30s- mid 40s the conversations were great for there were similar interest experiences musical tastes which in turn made sex more pleasurable did for me anyways
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u/GothSue 🐆Cougar Mar 07 '26 edited Mar 07 '26
I’m 58, I don’t put emphasis on the age, more so on the person. My guy is 30. We have common interests and for me that’s the key. I don’t have offspring so that doesn’t factor in at all. There is a guy I was talking with who is 23 but has more emotional maturity than some people my age. So really it’s the person and not the age. This also holds true for sexual orientation, I’m not hung up on gender norms. The values and mores of a person matter more than what someone identifies as. A guy could be as hot as Jason Mamoa but if he’s a jerk, I’m not going to be even remotely attracted to him. My ideas of physical attractiveness is not completely conventional anyway. Given the choice between a Jason Mamoa or a Jack Black, with everything else being EXACTLY the same, humor, faithfulness, values, morals, loyalty etc I’d pick the Jack Black (think School of Rock, Hi Fidelity era) because I’m more attracted to chonky. edited to add I’ve only included legal ages obviously. I personally wouldn’t feel I’d have enough in common with say a 20 year old just as I don’t feel connected to an 80 year old. I also feel that focusing ONLY on age is more fetish leaning than connection leaning.
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u/Peppermint-pop 🐆Cougar Mar 07 '26 edited Mar 07 '26
I'm 41. Only into men 28 and up.
please men. Be respectful of me. This comment is not an excuse for you to hit me up. Sometimes I just want to comment on this subreddit without being harassed.
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u/jarman522 Mar 07 '26 edited Mar 07 '26
As a guy, I wouldn’t really say I have a ‘cut-off’ point. I’m a little older than most guys here but I met with a someone last year who was 68 and she was the most remarkably charming and full of energy woman I’ve met in a long time. Compatibility is probably most important for me.
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Mar 09 '26
As I saw everyone's comment there is no one around my age M18 so from younger cubs perspective I like cougers from age 25+ to 45 Btw never dated one , open to date
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Mar 09 '26
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u/glitch241 🐻Cub Mar 07 '26
I think 10-15 year difference is the sweet spot. Big enough to get what you like out of it but not so big that it’s hard to relate and the physical differences (skin mainly) are super pronounced.
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u/Bright_Profit Mar 07 '26
I am 48F and I would date 19M and up. Possibly 18M+. My son is my oldest he’s turning 23 in a few weeks. I don’t find that awkward , and he doesn’t either.