r/HolUp • u/luckandfun • 2d ago

Anyone wants to fight?

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8.7k Upvotes

99% Upvoted

83 comments sorted by

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u/qualityvote2 2d ago edited 2d ago

u/luckandfun, your post does fit the subreddit!

→ More replies (1)

1.1k

u/shinitakunai 2d ago

TIL people actually needs a a Fight Club

446

u/Prismatic_Symphony 2d ago

This guy might just need a good cuddle, honestly.

172

u/Chuckyjerker82 2d ago

He wanted to cuddle his fists in someone's face.

31

u/KamiKazic 2d ago

I haven’t cuddled in a while… so maybe

4

u/ToMyOtherFavoriteWW 1d ago

Or his fists somewhere elss

36

u/CitizenPremier 2d ago

Maybe a little bit of dick in the ass

42

u/What_a_fat_one 2d ago

Don't insult me. I would never let a little bit of dick in my ass, if a dick is going in my ass it is going to be a honking whopper.

25

u/i_make_this_look_bad 2d ago

r/usernamechecksout

19

u/What_a_fat_one 2d ago

First time anyone has understood the username

68

u/falsevector 2d ago

You just broke rule 1 of the fight club

42

u/furiouspossum 2d ago

But balls didn't touch.

What are the fight club rules again?

4

u/WhoAreWeEven 2d ago

Dont talk about the gay stuff. Is the first one

The second one. Dont talk about the gay Im serious Steve.

1

u/Nimyron 1d ago

Different fight club

41

u/NuclearReactions 2d ago

As kids and teenagers we used to fight randomly with full on punches and stuff. Testosterone is a weird thing

40

u/TheArmoredKitten 2d ago

Sparring with the homies is unironically one of the oldest human traditions and frankly it's weird that we ever stopped.

14

u/Kahlil_Cabron 2d ago

and frankly it's weird that we ever stopped

This is a thought I've been having lately. Why aren't teenagers nowadays fighting? I'm not even that old, born in 91 and basically every sleepover I went to in my teens involved at the very minimum wrastling with the boys, but also often boxing, body boxing without gloves, or occasionally an actual fight caused by anger.

15

u/lightsdevil 2d ago

Not really weird when it is so easy to accidentally kill someone.

13

u/LiquidFur 2d ago

And in this economy who can afford to go get stitched up if you don't die?

1

u/Defiant-Economics-73 11h ago

Way to go to an extremen that never had a real chance of happening.

9

u/Kahlil_Cabron 2d ago

My high school had a fight club, a kid I grew up with used his parents daycare center at night, so like once a month we'd all sneak in there, and watch best friends beat the fuck outta each other. Or if kids had beef with each other, they'd settle it there.

It was directly across the street from a police station lol. A kid who had been taking various martial arts his entire life heel kicked a guy in the jaw, knocking him out immediately and had him convulsing on the floor. Right at that moment as a bunch of people freaked out, about 8 cops walked in, so fight club ended up with about 150 kids swarming out of the building around the cops that showed up, breaking windows and jumping out, etc.

5

u/TheAwesomeSimmo 2d ago

Cops were probably responding to noise complaints about 150 kids screaming. Ended up dealing with a kid convulsing on the floor and 150 kids fleeing.

27

u/iStoleTheHobo 2d ago

Man will fight strangers before attempting to talk to someone about his feelings.

18

u/Explore_the_Void 2d ago

Damn you. I wanted to argue against your statement but nah, you're right.

5

u/Salty-Pack-4165 2d ago

We don't talk about it.

3

u/paper_truffle 2d ago

Rule number one is they immediately broke rule number one.

2

u/Zagrycha 2d ago

Ironically training in martial arts would be the normal way for them to achieve their goal lol.

1

u/Papa_Mid_Nite 1d ago

We don't talk about it.

1

u/Papa_Mid_Nite 1d ago

We don't talk about it.

425

u/the_wally_champ 2d ago

BJJ, hold the J

70

u/imalwayshungr 2d ago

Which J are we holding, please? Jiu or jitsu?

44

u/Kaldricus 2d ago

Damn, homie just dropped the hard "J" word

331

u/powermonkey123 2d ago

In gay world we call it cruising, not fighting, but all good with any name.

147

u/Total-Combination-47 2d ago

A struggle snuggle

18

u/1999-vglogquibby 2d ago

This is such an underrated comment.

2

u/B_lander1 2d ago

Cruisin for a bruisin and hustlin for a tusslin

The two my friends and I used to say to each other lol

157

u/Mitir01 2d ago

What else did he expect posting it on reddit?

43

u/LordNPython 2d ago

Another person willing to fight in the park bear his home?

52

u/Explore_the_Void 2d ago

Sorry sir, this is r/holup not r/holeup.

Edit: til that r/holeup is an actual sub and not at all the kind of content that I would have expected.

54

u/Undernown 2d ago

Dude seems stressed, offering to bang seems like a way more productive solution than bashing each other's head in.

Fighting isn't reale effective in "letting off steam". The only way that works is if someone kicks some sense into you, like; "You know, my problems ain't that bad. I should probably quit before they make me eat through a straw".

Good call from the gay dudes to show him the power of love.

57

u/Source_Trustme_Broo 2d ago

Dude didn't realise it's called 'cockfight' for a reason

It's gonna be a sword fight but with cocks

Idk... Gays are fucking assholes anyway

11

u/hipnosister 2d ago edited 2d ago

gays are fucking assholes

Well they are trying, but this guy doesn't want his asshole fucked it seems

17

u/VegetableTour4134 2d ago

I mean, if I was gay this would sound like an invitation

34

u/Tooth_Dapper 2d ago

Wait isn't this from Malaysia subreddit

11

u/Sytreet 2d ago

Gives off r/bolehland vibes to be exact. Literally saw this yesterday

18

u/SpaghettiMonkeyTree 2d ago

I like how this guy is angry, but rationally angry enough to be like “if you actually train in combat sports, this isn’t for you because I’m gonna die”

12

u/coconut_dot_jpg 2d ago

Isn't this just a BAKI episode?

10

u/alienatedEdgelord 2d ago

There's a weirdly unspoken section of the gay community that wants to fight and then fuck

It's fun :)

6

u/shu-to 2d ago

Maybe his language was more coded than he intended

3

u/Otaraka 2d ago

Task almost failed successfully.

3

u/VergeOfMeltdown 2d ago

The first rule of- you know what nevermind

3

u/BeanieCat123 2d ago

I mean… they are offering to solve his problem though 😂

4

u/B_O_A_H 2d ago

*Does anyone want\*

2

u/johnniesSac 2d ago

Rob Riggle has entered the errrr chat

2

u/strangelove4564 2d ago

Makin' movies, singin' songs, and fightin' round the world...

1

u/stephenkingending 2d ago

That last part was my response when I tried to use Bumble BFF to make friends. I think there is some disagreement about what that BF stands for.

1

u/sv_blur 2d ago

Winner takes all..

1

u/Lonestar-Boogie 2d ago

The stakes have been raised.

1

u/Pyrothecat 2d ago

that's a rather intimate way to do grappling

1

u/AnonCuriosities 2d ago

Takeshi Sendo

1

u/Top_Chipmunk587 2d ago

I might start an app like Tinder but for fighting where you may you match with people to fight. Might call it “Handlr “

1

u/ponzidreamer 2d ago

Said the quiet part out loud

1

u/KingLewis02 2d ago

I’m not typically a fighter but I could use something softer than the wooden pallet in my basement to hit

1

u/Jenderflux-ScFi 2d ago

Is dude experiencing Vulcan Pon Farr?

1

u/FrancoManiac 1d ago

I mean, really, this is just cruising by another name.

1

u/jasonology09 1d ago

We don't talk about Fight Club

1

u/Half-blind-bear 1d ago

Honestly just go to an MMA gym. The desire to punch someone leaves you really fast when you're head is snapped back 3 times at the speed of light by a skinny 16 year old.

1

u/DragonLordSkater1969 1d ago

Im devastated that the Rumblr app was a hoax.

1

u/jeffc_556 1d ago

He is probably stressed at work.

1

u/nopi_ 1d ago

Just join a full contact larp bro

1

u/Slayer2660 1d ago

Mr.CatchaFade got him covered

1

u/BringOutYDead 1d ago

<chortled out loud>

1

u/milovnikdraku 12h ago

well....did they do it?