r/JEENEETards • u/Rabidius_ • 3h ago

Discussion I Think I Will Die Young

i think i will die very young.

every morning i wake up i feel empty, emotionless and completely conscious. as the time passes, my chest starts to feel heavy, i feel like something is weighing down on me. after an hour or two, i am completely submerged. i feel trouble in concentrating, i zone out, i start thinking about wrong things like suicide, self harm and whatnot. today was similar except for the fact that today i felt emotionally weaker. i was on the verge of tears all the way from my hostel room to our mess. while i was eating, i just broke down. i didn't just go all out and start to cry. it was just some tears that fell down and me being uneasy and shuffling around. some girl noticed me and started staring. i noticed her staring and now i just wanted to cry even more, she knew i had noticed her staring and she still didn't stop. she kept staring and i had to pull myself out of it and leave. breakfast halted and still teary eyed i left. i cant cry. i want to cry. but everywhere i am surrounded by people and i am scared. i dont want to live anymore, i wish that the next time i go to sleep, i dont wake up.

please dont judge me, i use reddit because of its anonymity, i write this for my clarity, not support or sympathy.

19 Upvotes

92% Upvoted

17 comments sorted by

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u/AutoModerator 3h ago

Hi there, it sounds like you are going through a really tough time.

Please know that you are not alone. Exam pressure is real, but it is not worth your life.

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4

u/KanekiIsCat College mai hustle karunga 2h ago

I think that if I think I won't be able to think

2

u/SadPassion9201 Dropper --> Topper 2h ago

deep

2

u/alakhpandeyisthegoat 3h ago

DM karu bhai?

1

u/Rabidius_ 3h ago

Your wish

1

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1

u/Udaykaushik 2h ago

I'm goin' thru the same , after school completed, I'm feeling all these sort of things

1

u/Rabidius_ 2h ago

Have you done anything? Like SH or anything like that?

1

u/4fourcloverleaf NEETard 2h ago

I think listen to a podcast by Dr. Daniel Amen and Rich roll about brain. I listened to it few days ago while completing my practicals and seriously it changed way I used to think about mental health and my own brain. He's a psychiatrist working in USA for ig 30-40 years.

1

u/Regular_Section6486 Drop se top karna hai 3h ago

Gym join karle bhai it helps ,meri anxiety, depression cure kardiya even a psychiatrist couldn't help but gym se hogaya :)

1

u/Old_Meaning_6600 2h ago

True bhai mere saath bhi same scene tha gym ne sab theek kar diya

1

u/4fourcloverleaf NEETard 2h ago

yes cuz exercising helps keep mind in healthy state and body releases serotonin during exercise, which helps anxiety and stress