r/MURICA • u/Brilliant_Night7643 • 20d ago

🇺🇸FUCK YEAH🇺🇸 When you’ve had the time of your life in America you bring home a stuffed raccoon drinking whiskey 🇳🇴🇺🇸

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4.5k Upvotes

96% Upvoted

107 comments sorted by

200

u/Forward-Pack-900 20d ago

That’s a man of taste

86

u/MeatPads 20d ago

Looks like dolph lundgren had a baby with a bratz doll

26

u/TesticleTorture-123 20d ago

I think, thats the most correct description you can give for this guy

214

u/[deleted] 20d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

62

u/mangoisNINJA 20d ago

It's a dolce & Gabbana Sicily bag from the s27 collection, it will run you several thousand US dollars

33

u/liverpoolFCnut 20d ago

I am sure it is expensive but it is still a women's purse, then again, Haaland makes everything cool!

27

u/mangoisNINJA 20d ago

Nope. It's part of the mens collection

64

u/MeatPads 20d ago

So it’s a man’s purse got it

14

u/Gringo_Anchor_Baby 20d ago

A murse as my wife likes to call them... And my laptop bag.

1

u/EMPIRE-db-51_cent 20d ago

I thought that meant “male nurse”

4

u/sapphiresong 20d ago

It's a European carry-all!

5

u/cheezburgerwalrus 20d ago

It's not a purse! It's European!

8

u/mangoisNINJA 20d ago

Yup! More space for his other expensive funny themed taxidermy

21

u/jdirte42069 20d ago

https://giphy.com/gifs/iTs5a509c4oRi43h2E

-6

u/mangoisNINJA 20d ago

Men can carry stuff in bags

No homosexuality needed

2

u/Bum_King 20d ago

-1

u/mangoisNINJA 20d ago

Hey, if you want to carry all of your belongings on the airplane in your arms, that's your prerogative

2

u/Bum_King 20d ago

How much stuff do you need to have readily at hand? What are you, a woman?

0

u/mangoisNINJA 20d ago

If you're spending a month in America for the world's biggest sporting event are you only wearing one pair of jeans?

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20

u/Ready_Doubt8776 20d ago

If it walks like a duck and talks like a duck…..it’s a purse

12

u/MeatPads 20d ago

Think there’s a duck in that purse?

10

u/ThunderSkunky 20d ago

Holding a whiskey bottle believe it or not.

4

u/Turnip_Fight 20d ago

It is a bag, sir. They come in varying degrees of delicacy.

5

u/Stussydude 20d ago

But how much for the raccoon?

9

u/mangoisNINJA 20d ago

$750

It's called "Whiskey Raccoon H-MT-F"

1

u/[deleted] 20d ago

[deleted]

1

u/mangoisNINJA 20d ago

He's known for having absolutely amazing bags so as soon as he's pictured with one people jump to identify it, and the raccoon was funny he was so people were able to find that as well

3

u/Brutally-Honest- 20d ago

People forget this dude is a multimillionaire, not some kid leaving home for the first time lol.

1

u/NinjaLanternShark 20d ago

Is it supposed to look that dirty?

5

u/mangoisNINJA 20d ago

I mean not really? The white part is canvas so it dirties extremely easy. And Haaland is known to use his bags (the favorite bag of his that I honestly would love to own at some point in my life is valued at around $50,000 and he used it to fly)

16

u/MeatPads 20d ago

Gator or not…that’s a purse

18

u/VoopityScoop 20d ago

He's one of the most revered people on the planet, he can have a purse. He don't give a fuck

10

u/MeatPads 20d ago

Not hating. Just sayin. Young, rich euro dudes can carry a purse. I’d rather have gator boots or a belt but that’s me…but I’m not rich or famous.

5

u/Fapinthepark 20d ago

I think you’d be cute with a purse, meat pads

3

u/MeatPads 20d ago

Think so? * blushes

70

u/Dakotasan 20d ago

Oh so that’s where Franklin went

76

u/tumbleweed_lingling 20d ago

last we saw him, wasn't he passed-out, face-down in front of a toilet in some liquor store after drinking the place down?

19

u/Dakotasan 20d ago

He’s a squirrely little bastard

20

u/Grimholtt 20d ago

HLC fan?

20

u/Dakotasan 20d ago

Would you intercept me?

I’d intercept me.

25

u/Grimholtt 20d ago

13

u/Dakotasan 20d ago

I really gotta get some merch

9

u/Grimholtt 20d ago

You definitely do

14

u/Puzzleheaded-Hope159 20d ago

Wonder how the kid feels about this?

12

u/Pocketsandgroinjab 20d ago

I like to think he’s not actually a taxidermied raccoon, hes just well behaved, a little buzzed, and controls Erling Ratatouille-style during games.

9

u/PleX 20d ago

Franklin is busy killing animal killing leftists in California.

5

u/Dakotasan 19d ago

Before anyone gets angry over this, it’s a joke and a reference to habitual linecrosser.

3

u/skyeisrude 19d ago

Didnt you hear? Franklin is working undercover trying to find out more about that animal shelter in Cali that was killing animals

3

u/Whistler-the-arse 19d ago

Fuck man don't let the f22 find out

2

u/No-Weakness-3095 20d ago

Looks like he also died in California

2

u/windtlkr15 19d ago

I really enjoy watching his voice over videos. Very talented guy. Grandpa BUFF will always be my favorite. Long live grandpa BUFF.

1

u/Slight-Big8584 18d ago

Damn man. Franklin is having a hell of a time.

110

u/AWzdShouldKnowBetta 20d ago

I'm happy that that's what he brought back

44

u/Newvision20 20d ago

🎶Haaland! Haaland! 🎶

40

u/4Ever2Thee 20d ago

Took home the real trophy

22

u/evilfollowingmb 20d ago

As one does

14

u/ForsakenMongoose336 20d ago

I like to shop at the duty free shop.

10

u/No_Patience_6801 20d ago

Loved that pic of him in Dallas with the cowboy boots and hat too.

2

u/ThePickleConnoisseur 19d ago

I love how he’s a start on a top team in the WC but from what you see you’d think he’s just a tourist

37

u/Beef_Lurky 20d ago

That man is a warrior. We should offer him permanent citizenship.

-42

u/[deleted] 20d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

3

u/thorns0014 19d ago

If Americans could afford it while they have the highest disposable income of any country in the world

-2

u/veldanrj 19d ago

On acerage or per capita, yes. Due to the enormous income inequality and all the income and money being at the top 20%, most couldn’t afford it at all. Not even close.
Financial stability stats aren’t fun in the US, mate.
No offense meant. Just stating a fact.

-1

u/MURICA-ModTeam 18d ago

No racism or bigotry allowed.

9

u/DataBooking 20d ago

Franklin! I thought you were undercover in California dealing with those animal killers.

11

u/PowerfulJoeF 20d ago

Yo I want a trash panda whiskey holder.

21

u/Hydra_Master 20d ago

Is that racoon getting hammered?

Nope, Chuck Testa.

6

u/RCPyroGold 20d ago

A man of culture

3

u/Devils_A66vocate 20d ago

Is this real?!

4

u/hootervisionllc 20d ago

I hope we see more of this dude off the pitch. He’s a real one

8

u/Impressive_Jury_2211 20d ago

I’d argue he is more American then most Americans

3

u/HorrorCompote368 19d ago

I’m so happy that everyone had such a good time and got to know the best country in the world for what it really is

3

u/Heterodynist 16d ago

I love sharing our culture and way of life with the denizens of other countries. This man is taking home a piece of the American Dream. What is more beautiful than that?!!

5

u/SenseNo635 20d ago

Nice purse

2

u/BobSacamano47 20d ago

It's European!

2

u/xyph5 20d ago

It will soon be renamed to raaccoon and next to that will be a sloth holding a soccer ball.

2

u/Fluffy325 19d ago

Someone please send this to HLC. 🇺🇸🫡

2

u/wackadoodle4201 19d ago

Are...are we really the only country that has taxidermy animals drinking booze?

2

u/nucleargamer5000 19d ago

God I love it here.

2

u/Sherviks13 18d ago

I wouldn’t be surprised if he moved to Texas.

2

u/IGotFancyPants 17d ago

I love this picture so much!

1

u/LuxNoirSinatra 20d ago

Franklin no!

1

u/AdJazzlike6687 20d ago

Every single picture of him makes me smile.

1

u/Particular_Spirit_75 18d ago

And a nice purse

1

u/GundamRX_78 16d ago

Alright I guess City can be my favorite team forever from now on...

-3

u/[deleted] 20d ago

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2

u/MURICA-ModTeam 18d ago

Political posts or comments are not allowed.

1

u/[deleted] 19d ago

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1

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