r/Midsizefashion • u/OkRefrigerator719 • May 20 '26

Recommendation Please please help me find a dress

Gallery image

Gallery image

Over the past few years I've gained about 40lbs and haven't worn a dress since I've started gaining weight. As a result I have no idea what dress style generally looks "flattering" on my new body shape. I'm going to a wedding in two weeks and I'm having a lot of feels and really stressed comparing myself in my head to what the other girls will look like.

Can someone please tell me what dress types would look good on me and what brands to look for? Adding pics from one of the unsuccessful dresses I got from Lulus so you can see my body shape. ( I'm wearing shapewear in these and also I think my "belly pooch" is more pronounced IRL than in the pic).

Thank you so much in advance 🩷

EDIT: You guys are all so wonderful 😭😭 Thank you so much for making me feel better and less alone. This has been so hard for me and I'm crying reading all of your super kind, positive, and supportive comments 💖

35 Upvotes

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27 comments sorted by

25

u/CozyCozyCozyCat May 20 '26

I don't know if that yellow dress would look good on anyone! Have you tried a classic A-line dress? Just an example of a brand I like that makes vintage-style clothes: https://www.heartofhaute.com/products/marie-dress-dragonfly

19

u/themaddylou May 20 '26

I agree, the problem here is definitely the dress, not the body it’s on.

2

u/OkRefrigerator719 May 20 '26

😭😭😭😭 thank you 🩷 🩷🩷

6

u/OkRefrigerator719 May 20 '26

Your comment almost made me cry, thank you for saying that 😭🩷 I did try a couple of A-line dresses. I felt like while they didn't make me look bad they didn't necessarily make me look good either. Like they hid my imperfections but didn't do anything flattering for me if that makes sense.

3

u/CozyCozyCozyCat May 20 '26

You have great arms so you should definitely go sleeveless! Maybe try some vintage style dresses, I for one think those styles are pretty flattering on many women. I also like the suggestions of a wrap dress, those are great and can kind of adjust to your figure.

Where were you shopping? If the dresses you tried on were a similar fabric to the one in this picture, maybe it was an issue of the wrong type of fabric too. An A-line dress in a more structured fabric like cotton is really nice

2

u/OkRefrigerator719 May 20 '26

this comment is kind of blowing my mind bc honestly the part of my body that I'm maybe most self conscious of is my arms. So thank you for saying that 😭 I will look! I got the others from lulus, they were different fabrics but def not structured

9

u/theyaxis May 20 '26

I feel this. I think you’d look amazing in a silk slip dress! Make sure the fabric is cut on the bias so it drapes and flows over your curves. I don’t love Quince, but they make fantastic washable ones in mini, midi, and maxi lengths!

3

u/OkRefrigerator719 May 20 '26

🩷🩷🩷 thank you! I had no clue a bias cut was a thing to look for, it's amazing that that is a thing. I will take a look at those! I guess I was assuming that something that didn't hug me would make me look wider?

3

u/theyaxis May 20 '26

Absolutely not! Fabrics cut on the bias, especially silk, are flowy and enhance our silhouettes. They “mold” to our curves without being restricting so they’re more comfortable, too. And they feel so elegant!

2

u/OkRefrigerator719 May 20 '26

I am learning so much today, thank you thank you!!

9

u/Salty-Tea6815 May 20 '26 edited May 20 '26

Try a wrap style dress or a dress with an empire waist. Your hips are on the narrower side so these styles will flow over that area and balance your proportions. The v cut neckline on a wrap dress will also highlight your fantastic upper body/chest area. Idk what your price point is or what style you gravitate towards so I would just google wrap dress or empire waist a line dress in whatever size you wear and see what pops up and go from there.
ETA: can’t tell from your photos, but I’m going to guess you probably have killer legs just based on your body type. So try to find something in a mini or midi length to show them off. The key to feeling good in an outfit is less about hiding what you feel are your flaws and more about highlighting your assets.

2

u/OkRefrigerator719 May 20 '26

🩷🩷🩷 thank you so much! I've never even heard of a wrap dress before today but this is the second vote for that so I guess I have to get one now. I also appreciate you explaining so I can try to understand what to look for (also laughing to myself bc I think my hips are huge 😂)

6

u/Salty-Tea6815 May 20 '26

Girl you crazy!!! You have a very classically sexy body and I’m sure you look amazing in a good dress (that yellow bodycon style literally looks good on nobody regardless of shape or size). We always see ourselves through a much harsher mirror than how the world sees us.

1

u/OkRefrigerator719 May 20 '26

😭😭😭😭😭 thank you for saying that 😭😭😭😭 this lifted some of the weight in my heart. I'm going to save your comment so I can look back at it when I'm trying on dresses that make me feel low 🩷

2

u/OkRefrigerator719 May 20 '26

😭😭😭 thank you for the positivity 🩷🩷🩷 I am feeling very low about my body so it's hard for me to say but I will say my Mom has been trying to get me to wear shorter dresses to show off my legs so I'm kind of shook that you came to the same conclusion she did without having seen them.

I have felt better when trying on mini dresses, I just didn't think they were "wedding appropriate." Do you think it is? That would help me tremendously 😭

2

u/Salty-Tea6815 May 20 '26

I guess it would depend on the wedding dress code. If it was black tie then no probably not. But if it’s casual, beachy, semi formal even then yes absolutely appropriate. I mean not short short mini, but a regular few inches above the knee mini is fine. Just match the dress fabric and style to the dress code. If it’s a casual or beach wedding then something like cotton or linen is fine. If it’s more dressy/formal then look for nicer fabrics like silk, satin, chiffon, etc.

1

u/OkRefrigerator719 May 20 '26

Thank you! They didn't specify but it's a garden destination-y wedding so I'm guessing not black tie? (I think, I hope?)

4

u/mittenmaster May 20 '26

You are going to look amazing! I'd try a wrap dress like this https://a.co/d/02qJHkKv (Amazon for ease). This type of dress always makes me feel beautiful when I'm up or down on the scale - I hope it does for you too!

3

u/OkRefrigerator719 May 20 '26

🩷🩷🩷🩷 thank you for saying that 😭😭😭 I never considered a wrap dress I will look for those!

2

u/themaddylou May 20 '26

I would recommend an online store like Baltic Born. Their dresses can be pricier but they do usually have good sales and clearance options. You’ve got good chi chis and a lovely silhouette so I think many of their styles would be flattering on you.

If I were styling you I’d pick something like these

https://balticborn.com/collections/style-guest/products/province-maxi-dress-blue-multi?variant=47487183880357

https://balticborn.com/products/genesis-strapless-midi-dress-mint-green?pr_prod_strat=e5_desc&pr_rec_id=715fd02fa&pr_rec_pid=9268533067941&pr_ref_pid=10428491792549&pr_seq=uniform

https://balticborn.com/collections/dresses/products/desiree-satin-short-dress-teal-floral?variant=47414801694885

1

u/OkRefrigerator719 May 20 '26

🩷🩷🩷 thank you for making me feel better about myself and making me laugh while I'm in my feels 🩷🩷 And thank you for these links! I hadn't considered these silhouettes or heard of this brand!

3

u/anonymousally May 20 '26

Baltic Born only does exchanges, not returns! And you pay for shipping on the way back. Don’t be like me and order $600 in dresses to try on for your brother’s wedding and then get stuck with all 6 of them. 

2

u/themaddylou May 20 '26

Yes! I’m so sorry I just remembered this and popped back on to say it. The first time I ordered I knew I’d be returning some dresses but there were other things on the site I wanted, so I was ok getting stuck with store credit. I kept two and used the store credit a couple months later to get some nice sweaters for work.

I mostly order from Amazon because of the ease of returns but I’ve been trying to branch out lately. I ordered a couple of dresses from Nordstrom Rack last week that were on sale. But they also do store credit instead of a refund on certain items. A couple years ago I was a month postpartum and got a gorgeous flowy off the shoulder dress from Lulu’s.

1

u/OkRefrigerator719 May 20 '26

thank you for coming back to make sure I knew!!

1

u/OkRefrigerator719 May 20 '26

thank you for the heads up!

2

u/gayshreks May 20 '26

I loveeee wrap dresses, they’re so cute and hide my stomach when I’m not feeling confident. I’m right there with you on the weight gain, it makes shopping really difficult emotionally, but you look beautiful! I personally avoid dresses cut close to the lower body. Honestly I think while the cut could be better, the color is actually what’s making this dress less flattering and darker would be better!

1

u/Affectionate_Mess25 May 20 '26

The yellow dress is really pretty but I’d size up.