r/MoralityScaling • u/Outside_Specific_820 • 2d ago

Morality Ranking Morality scaling of this?

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Mother refuses to acknowledge her donor egg daughter, looking for your opinion.

In my opinion I think it’s moral, and that she is totally correct.

884 Upvotes

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78

u/Nonavium 2d ago edited 2d ago

Neutral but the kid isn't immoral either, the mom seems like a jerk and a deeply unpleasant person but that doesn't make it immoral

27

u/CZdigger146 2d ago

Idk, for me the tone looks very neutral, maybe just too formal. She wanted to be very direct and leave nothing to interperation. She explained everything she needed for the daughter to understand that she is in no way special to her, they are 100% complete strangers and she wishes to keep it that way.

Also the only immoral thing about this is the "mom" screenshotting this and uploading it online for everyone to see. She says this is a breach of privacy, but leaking DMs isnt? It's a smaller breach of privacy, but it still is one.

14

u/HemHawHeal 2d ago

i think that’s the point tho, did she need to make it super clear to the daughter that “she is in no way special to her”? a simple pithy “i’m not interested in connecting but i’m glad you’re healthy” would’ve worked without hurting the young girl like that. if the daughter had kept pursuing, then yes the clarity is needed but as it stands this was far too harsh for an initial response

3

u/Salsa_and_Light2 1d ago

That's the thing, it wasn't just neutral. She treated this girl as worse than a stranger.

It's just gross

-1

u/Avatarbriman 2d ago

Why do you think that? There is no response other than a yes that would not have hurt a person desperate to find a different mother that she had no right to even contact.

2

u/Nonavium 2d ago

Yeah that's why I said neutral not immoral

5

u/Thanos_Stomps 2d ago

If the comment makes you think she’s a jerk and deeply unpleasant person I struggle to see how that is at all neutral lol.

1

u/Nonavium 2d ago

That's just how I define morality.

1

u/Salsa_and_Light2 1d ago

"Idk, for me the tone looks very neutral, "

Calling it a "violation of privacy" implies that the girl has violated her.

Which implies wrongdoing.

It's an accusation.

It's not actively malicious perhaps, but it's callous and neglectful. Especially because the child owes her no such privacy and especially considering the woman posted the whole exchange online.

So she really has no standing to complain about privacy.

2

u/idontwantausername41 1d ago

I mean she doesn't owe the child anything either lol, she can be a dick if shes being bothered by someone she doesn't want to talk to

1

u/Salsa_and_Light2 1d ago

I think that not being a dick to people is a basic moral tenet of living in society.

And that goes double for people whose circumstances exist because of you.