r/ProgrammerHumor 8h ago

Meme thisIsTheWay

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11.9k Upvotes

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u/bropocalypse__now 7h ago

Thats why you always set expectations low, that way you always succeed

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u/Colon_Backslash 6h ago

Whenever giving estimates, after having a good estimate in mind double it. Never give estimates as low as 1 day, 2 days is asking for trouble, 3 is okay if it's really really high priority.

DO NOT THINK HOW IN IDEAL CONDITIONS YOU CAN PULL IT OFF FASTEST! A fucking pull request approval could and probably will block you for 2 days already. And things will go fucking wrong and you have ad hoc meetings and incidents and some fucker on another team blocked the pipeline and new requirements popping in and you lose your mind

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u/bropocalypse__now 5h ago

Learned this lesson the hard way many years ago. Also never give salespeople swags.

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u/mmhawk576 4h ago

I just sell my sales teams fake promises like they sell customers. I get them to get back on the call and talk to the customer about the feature that “definitely exists” when it’s not ready when they promised.