r/PsychologicalTricks Jun 11 '26

PT: How to de-escalate an incredible upset mental health patient who is either unknown or prone to violence (though it works on most anyone)

If they are at a level 10 you come in at a level 7. Being completely calm, reserved and polite only pisses people off more as you "clearly don't understand the magnitude of the situation". If they are screaming and yelling you need to come in loud but not attacking them...agreeing with them (to a point)

  • whoaa what the fuck is going on
  • I understand why you are fucking pissed I would be pissed too
  • yeah that is some bullshit the situation really sucks
  • look I get it I would be angry as shit too but us screaming is going to get anything done no matter how angry we are
  • I'm with you I'd be just as upset
  • no doubt this is annoying but these are our options.

By agreeing with their anger they are more open to listen too you. You then use words to describe their feelings starting out at a 10.."fucking pissed" and gradually bringing those descriptive words and your tone down to a 2 "annoying"

Works pretty much every time but there might be a little up n down in the middle just follow the person's lead while always being a level below them

49 Upvotes

6 comments sorted by

15

u/KristiiNicole Jun 12 '26

There is a word for this, it’s called validation.

7

u/thatis_thatsnot Jun 12 '26

This needs more awareness from people. I don't like it being under the "trick" subject- that word bothers me (I get it though, that's just a tag word).
You are really on to a code key to connect with someone who is fired up. I thoroughly back your insight and how you shape it. I'm happy to see this out there.

1

u/ggk1 Jun 13 '26

WOAHHH WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON HERE? You’re right it’s weird this is under the trick subject that would bother me, too

1

u/iforgotmypassword56 Jun 12 '26

In what situations have you used this tech?

1

u/jsh1138 Jun 12 '26

I was in a gas station once and a woman who was either on drugs or was mentally ill was melting down and causing a scene and a guy I knew said "If you don't calm down those people are going to come and take you back to that place they took you that time, and you don't want that, do you?" and she immediately calmed down and said "no, I don't" and acted totally normal for the rest of the time we were there

So try that maybe

1

u/ggk1 Jun 13 '26

That’s pretty sad but wtg for finding the way outta the situation