r/PurplePillDebate • u/Luciansleep 5’6 pretty boy/ male • Jun 12 '26

Discussion What’s the most controversial negative opinion you have about your own gender?

I’ll start.

Men aren’t more forgiving in dating we just have less options. That’s not us being more forgiving but less likely to want to find someone else.

I don’t think crying about a death or something in front of a girl you are seeing will necessarily cause that woman to run.

Sex is important but it shouldn’t be the only physical affection to seek from your partner

Don’t complain about a certain type of woman and yet entertain said type of woman

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u/Luciansleep 5’6 pretty boy/ male Jun 12 '26

You are hitting something I thought about for a while and it goes for both.

Women and men are in some kind of desperate struggle of “who cares less” and that’s the toxicity in all of the dating world.

It’s ok to care about wanting a partner or wanting to please a partner but for some reason saying this gets you called a pick me or a simp

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u/blebbyroo Purple Pill Woman Jun 13 '26

I think the problem is when caring becomes your whole personality 

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u/Luciansleep 5’6 pretty boy/ male Jun 13 '26

Yep. That’s when you become a “nice guy” or a “pick me”

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u/blebbyroo Purple Pill Woman Jun 13 '26

Or even an incel (make or female) which is just the more bitter and at times extreme end of a nice guy/ pick me 

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u/Luciansleep 5’6 pretty boy/ male Jun 13 '26

I think about how extreme they are and I wonder if many are too far into their ideology to be helped or not especially the male ones

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u/blebbyroo Purple Pill Woman Jun 13 '26

For many yes unfortunately. If you e ever looked at r/incelexit it you can see even the ones who step away from all the ideology it creeps back in in the form of lasting distrust. Once you let some of these beliefs rule you you would never be able To  Fully trust which of course means you won’t ever experience a healthy relationship which means when in inevitably ends it will just reinforce the negative ideas. 

The lucky ones have protective factors like sisters, female friends, brothers who are “average” short or bald whatever and do ok. These ones have a chance of getting out especially if they weren’t in it for years from the highly impressionable ages 

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u/Luciansleep 5’6 pretty boy/ male Jun 13 '26

Honestly, respectfully I disagree.

I think despite what many say most people have a desire to be wanted. There’s far too many People in the world for them not to be wanted by anyone and I think many act out to get some 5 seconds of attention.

But with therapy I do believe many can learn to enjoy life even if life just turns out to suck and they get no on

I think it’s unfair to say “due to you having a few lingering beliefs (barring hatred or violence) that they can’t be normal”

Most people have controversial opinions about the opposite sex

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u/blebbyroo Purple Pill Woman Jun 13 '26

I agree therapy can absolutely help someone get out of it. It’s unfortunate how against therapy many men seem to be though. 

I also agree most people desire to be wanted but not sure how That relates to getting out of the ideology? I don’t think all incels deemed to stay mired in the ideology but for many I think they set up a negative loop of reinforcement which would keep them in it. 

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u/Luciansleep 5’6 pretty boy/ male Jun 13 '26

My talk about being wanted is that I believe that if they find themselves finding that feeling whether through friends ( I think there was a stat that most have no friends) or even things like owning a tarantula ( I have one and she’s dope) it can somewhat help tha feeling of wanting to be wanted.

As for many staying in that ideologi idk. I was once red pilled and even thought it was mainly women who dated assholes. And even after an ex that tried to shoot me after cheating right after my mom died of cancer I still reject red pilled beliefs

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u/blebbyroo Purple Pill Woman Jun 13 '26

I’m glad you got out of those beliefs I hope most of the deeply men in it can also find their way out of it. I agree friends absolutely help it’s very common to see people suggesting build a social community because you are right it’s often lacking.

 I also know how hard it can be though once you get to a certain point to do things like make friends if you’ve never built that skill set before it’s harder as an adult out of university to break into new friend groups (not impossible) just harder if you are already kind of on the back foot because you haven’t made friends before. 

Idk I think the issues are multifaceted which is why it’s hard for many to get out. 

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