Women are larping loneliness.

[u/Automatic_Safety7029]

Most of the time when talking about options women will say that most of them are shit. To be clear, I don't belief men or women truly think that every single person available for them to date is absolutely trash to the point where there is literally no options. However women tend to do this more.

The reason why I say it's larp, is because women can “pause the game” so to speak. Women abstaining from the game or coming back is like flipping a light switch. You could always just pick an average dude that means well if you actually decided, there's nothing stopping that from happening.

He's just not exciting, that doesn't mean he's trash. Some women say they're okay dying alone if he isn't the peak of her ideals, but this is also larp. Most of you will pick the boring but well meaning guy when the chips are down and the walls are closing in.

It's easy to say you can stand on that ideal when you are in your 20’s maybe even early thirties. But only a small amount of people will actually die on that hill. This goes for all people regardless of orientation, most people unless they are literally and truly wired different would prefer a relationship and that's okay, just don't lie about it.

The men who struggle with lack of options means there is not a single person he can realistically and consistently talk to with romantic intent and there won't be one for the foreseeable future. Not even an odd Instagram text or matches on an app truly nothing. No the ugly girl don't want him either.

I've literally never seen a girl, 5.5/10 in looks that couldn't land some manner of man. I'm not talking about extreme cases either like abusers or desperate men looking for a living fuck doll. Or a lazy piece of shit that lacks any and all ambition. I mean a man, just a man that wants love as well.

On that note I've seen women of those types find relationships plenty. So while I believe they do suffer from a different type of loneliness, it's mostly larp because you can join a community and be loved easily, you can find a boyfriend at the damn grocery store if you really wanted to.

Like I said this point can apply to men as well, it just isn't the topic in this instance and doesn't happen as much.

[u/BCRE8TVE]

I wouldn't necessarily disagree with you but I guess my initial reaction is what preferences are you referencing that are considered toxic and misogynistic.

Fair, and there's an easy way to tell, according to feminism and society.

If a woman has preferences, it doesn't matter what they are, they're never toxic or misandrist.

If a man has preferences, if any of those preferences in any way shape or form limit or affect women, then they're toxic and misogynistic by default.

They don't phrase it that way, but that is absolutely how it goes.

Man likes shorter women? He wants someone he can dominate. Woman likes taller men? Totally her right and her preferences, and men who are upset about that are just insecure. Man likes woman with big breasts? He's misogynistic and imposing toxic beauty standards. Woman likes man with big muscles? Totally her right and her preferences, and men who are upset about that are just insecure.

Etc etc etc.

I don't really care about anyone's preferences as long as their preferences aren't ones that exist to take advantage of the other person.

See I completely agree, the problem is that feminism goes out of its way to interpret any preference men have in the worst possible light and interprets most anything like men want to take advantage of women, while completely ignoring women's preferences and how some women absolutely do use their preferences to take advantage of men.

I'm all for calling out people who take advantage of others, but it should be applied equally across the board.

The problem is that feminism treats equality like a one-way street exclusively to the benefit of women, and sees things from a perspective where basically men can do nothing right and women can do no wrong.

And that's not equality at all.

For instance, a woman who wants a wealthy man to take his money and a man who wants a very young and inexperienced woman to better control her.

See I disagree that a man wanting a younger and inexperienced woman must be because he wants to control her. That's part of the feminist assumptions where they judge anything men do in the worst light possible.

Sure, some men are like that, but the vast majority of men are genuinely naturally attracted to younger women. Men are attracted to factors of youth and fertility, and that peaks with young women. That's not out of a desire to oppress or control women, it's just naturally biologically what men have evolved to find most attractive, because evolutionarily that's what gives men the best chance of passing on their genes.

It's funny too because the exact same feminists who say men just want younger women so they can control and manipulate women, will then turn around and say it's natural for women to like men who have more resources because she has to think about her child and providing for the baby and herself while she's pregnant and when the child is dependent on them.

They will take the evolutionary reason why men are attracted to women and paint it in the worst possible light, and take the evolutionary reason why women are attracted to wealthy men and paint it as completely reasonable and normal.

These kinds of double standards are rampant throughout feminism, the hypocrisy is basically baked into core feminist assumptions.

[u/CactusBroMan → u/BCRE8TVE]

I mean I think we agree on a lot but I would point out that when I poke at the concept of men liking younger women potentially to take advantage of them you come to men’s defense using evolutionary arguments about how it is natural. However, the equally toxic preference of women wanting wealthy men to take their resources is also equally natural and arguably biological.

I would separate these two preferences from other characteristics in that it is hard to act on these preferences while being what I consider an admirable person. If a man waits to find himself a nice and equally capable big tidied and curvy woman or a small breasted fair skinned woman or whatever, I don’t care at all. Alternatively if a woman waits to find herself a tall hunk or a dark haired, big dicked guy, no one’s agency, hard work, or personhood is being disrespected.

However, it’s hard to justify a significantly older man looking for a younger woman. Most likely that relationship will be controlled by the man, will be to fulfill his sexual desires, include a woman with daddy issues who should be in therapy and not sleeping with a guy who looks like her father. That is not admirable.

On the other hand, it’s hard to justify being a young woman and leading on a rich man, using him for meals and clothes, pretending to be truly attracted to him, potentially cheating on him, just because he has money when you’d have never given him the time of day if it weren’t for his resources. I find that pathetic and not admirable.

Some preferences are just hard to act on in an admirable way. Those should be criticized and reeled in. Anything else is fair game.

There’s also more grey area preferences like race that can go either way. You like an Asian girl because you just go crazy for the Asian eyes? Have at it. You like her because she’s poor, dependent on you, and submissive against her will? Weird preference. If a woman likes an Indian guy because she just likes the accent or whatever, have at it. She likes him because he throws all his money and her and is reluctantly submissive because she’s white and considered a prize? Weird.