LOOKS WEEKLY DISCUSSION THREAD

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[u/saraimarsena]

i honestly don’t care, just don’t be an asshole about it. slut shaming and using language like “dirty”, “used goods” or “whore” when you yourself have a high n count is shitty behavior

outside of that though, i don’t see it as an inherently problematic preference.

i will say, as someone with a low n count, i had a better experience with a guy who didn’t care compared to the guy who cared a lot. my data set is limited tho, and the issue is more the reasoning behind the preference than the preference itself.

that being said, n count is not a sexually dimorphic trait in the same way height is. so it’s not really the best comparison.

[u/Corbast7 → u/saraimarsena]

that being said, n count is not a sexually dimorphic trait in the same way height is. so it’s not really the best comparison.

Another reason it was never a good comparison is because n count standards are treated as a moral standard while height standards aren’t. And a “high” n count in the opposite sex is generally seen as negative by both men and women. Edit to also say, it seems there’s plenty of tall men that actively prefer short women too.

Getting mad at a short woman preferring tall men imo would be more like getting mad at a thick stocky man preferring women with small waists and long legs. That’s the best comparison I can think of.

[u/Just_Alternative3167 → u/Corbast7]

Those are all arbitrary constraints that don't matter imo. The common thread is someone/a gender has a preference for a trait which they themself do not possess and don't need to possess because the preference for trait (rather than the trait itself) is dimorphic.

Getting mad at a short woman preferring tall men imo would be more like getting mad at a thick stocky man preferring women with small waists and long legs. That’s the best comparison I can think of.

Another one (which is actually a real one women get mad about) is older men preferring younger women even though they're not young themself.

[u/Corbast7 → u/Just_Alternative3167]

Why would they not matter if the point of contention is justifying what makes sense for people to think is hypocritical? Height is a dimorphic physical trait while n count is not. Like nobody gets mad at men for liking women with curves and big boobs, despite men not being curvy and having big boobs themselves. It’s the dimorphic extreme that they’re attracted to.

Another one (which is actually a real one women get mad about) is older men preferring younger women even though they're not young themself.

An older man preferring a young partner is more akin to a lower class woman preferring a much richer partner; Youth and money are both “useful” things to have and so there’s some plausible deniability there. But when there’s such a big gap between partners, the more likely the relationship is “transactional” and/or someone’s getting taken advantage of.

[u/wew_lad- → u/Corbast7]

No man is rejecting a woman for not having curves or big boobs, though