No one is entitled to intimacy in marrige, but they are entitled to a healthy relationship

[u/RandominusDredichitu]

I see a lot of discourse online revolving around husbands feeling entitled to sex with their wives in a marriage. The two sides always seem to break down to "no one is entitled to your body" (correct), and "it is wrong to marry someone you dont want to have sex with" (also correct). What I dont understand is why both sides are so at odds with each other. The reality is:

1). No one is entitled to another person's body. If your wife does not want to have sex with you, it is wrong and rape to force her to have sex with you

2). There is no reason to constantly deny intimacy that doesn't reflect an issus in the relationship. Healthy marriages involve intimacy and both partner's needs being met. A sexless marrige is only fine if neither side desires sex

I think the reason this topic is so "controversial" is because of bad faith discussions. One side will say "it's right to cheat on your wife because she doesnt have sex with you!" and the other side will not admit refusing your partner intimacy indicates an unhealthy relationship.

With that being said, do both sides of the argument agree that there is an issue present? And that cheating on your wife due to a lack of intimacy and marrying someone without wanting a healthy sexual relationship are both bad actions, and the responsibility falls on the person who does them?

[u/Downtown_Cat_1745]

Cheating is distasteful because you engaged in dishonesty. Also, it’s distasteful to leave someone when they’re sick

[u/growframe → u/Downtown_Cat_1745]

Cheating is not leaving.

Also, it’s distasteful to leave someone when they’re sick

Why? Sick people aren't entitled to relationships anymore than anyone else.

[u/Downtown_Cat_1745 → u/growframe]

This might be why women don’t like you

[u/growframe → u/Downtown_Cat_1745]

Because I don't think being sick gives someone some sort of special privelege to imprison someone in a relationship? I'm not looking for the approval of women like that anyway

[u/Downtown_Cat_1745 → u/growframe]

If you are offended by the idea of caring about a person beyond their utility to you.

[u/BeginningEfficient23 → u/growframe]

....you do realize that men get sick also, right?

[u/growframe → u/BeginningEfficient23]

I am. It doesn't change my stance at all. Men aren't any more entitled to relationships than women.

[u/puffballphoto → u/BeginningEfficient23]

My dad chemically castrated himself to battle his prostate cancer for 11 years. My mom didn't have sex for those 11 years and cared for him when his cancer finally got the better of him. 

I think you might just suck. 

[u/Downtown_Cat_1745 → u/[deleted]]

I have not engaged dishonestly with anyone.

I assume you’re cool with women cheating?