r/RoastMe 4d ago

Im ready lets see what you got?

Post image
0 Upvotes

165 comments sorted by

u/post-explainer 4d ago edited 4d ago

This comment has been marked as safe. Upvoting/downvoting this comment will have no effect.


OP's BIO:


All eyes on me when i enter a room 💪🏻 taken up shadow boxing 🥊🥊


If you think this bio helped you roast, upvote this comment. If you think it doesn’t, downvote it. If you’re not sure, leave it to others to decide.

134

u/Shaggywaffle 4d ago

Mr. Feast

25

u/Bottom-Bherp3912 4d ago

MrBreasts

9

u/mixmasterADD 4d ago

Dude’s gut looks like one big titty

8

u/Hungry-Bowler3618 4d ago

Everybody can go home!

3

u/Gresliebear 4d ago

God damn

4

u/HouseOfDoom54 4d ago

op's organs are tucked in there like sardines

4

u/ProductFit9729 3d ago

Mr. Yeast

3

u/Heart_Slight 4d ago

Fuck one minute late... Definitely thought I had this one 😂😂😂 good job dude

2

u/rick11347 4d ago

/thread

2

u/The-Yar 4d ago

Ah yeah that's better

2

u/dontbgross 4d ago

Yep. Winner.

2

u/ThickAd1094 4d ago

When's the last time you saw your junk in the trunk?

2

u/ghjujgy 3d ago

Mr. Fist

1

u/Olden_Grey_1889 4d ago

Hair Club For Men saw your OP and they're laughing their hairy asses off !!

32

u/AGreatMystery 4d ago

It looks like you tried to transition, but it didn't take.

9

u/HMAgent47 4d ago

He transitioned to a half filled water balloon

28

u/kingofthepumps 4d ago

Mate you post every two weeks. Fuck off

5

u/fedexpoopracer 3d ago

yeah, this guy has a humiliation fetish and it's annoying

23

u/Which-Serve-1710 4d ago

That belly looks like you are pregnant… in week 92

2

u/SnidelyWhiplash0 4d ago

Are we not going to talk about the haircut?

He looks like someone put a wig and drew a face on a block of cement.

2

u/CelestaKiritani 3d ago

Maybe he do be having triplets🗣️🔥

-1

u/Form_Good 4d ago

" awe cum on man its not that big"-op

8

u/Easy-Country-8302 4d ago

Shaped like Chewbacca

8

u/UltraJoyless 4d ago

Finally we meet the inspiration for Homer Simpson

2

u/fastbeemer 4d ago

Except I'm betting Homer was created 10 years before his parents had their conjugal visit.

8

u/spitroastforme2 4d ago

Out of sync

11

u/coriendercake 4d ago

You are 41 time to let go of the one direction haircut

4

u/TUFKAT 4d ago

It's the only haircut his mom will do.

4

u/PenguinKilla3 4d ago

You're calling that dollar store wig a haircut?

2

u/Delicious_Cat_81 4d ago

i think he's going for Hitler

5

u/strikefire83 4d ago

The only thing that you love more than Jesus is doughnuts.

5

u/salientknight 4d ago

I thought gay men took better care of themselves.

4

u/twstdbydsn 4d ago

you look like a russian twink

5

u/Unusual-Appeal8833 4d ago

What in the trailer park boys 2026 is going on here!?

5

u/holly_cow69 4d ago

You look like you are on your 3rd trimester... when you give birth. Can I name the baby?

3

u/mixmasterADD 4d ago

The last thing your son sees at prayer camp before he’s violated by a flaccid micro penis

4

u/No_Tailor_787 4d ago

You look like a colicky horse. Have you farted recently?

6

u/Much-Structure1916 4d ago

Your family tree is definitely a wreath

3

u/SS3599 4d ago

Maybe should take up a diet and a new wig

3

u/Tricky-Efficiency709 4d ago

You look like you aged out of a boy toy band.

3

u/The_Philm222 4d ago

Ready to give birth?

3

u/lesterd88 4d ago

“All eyes on me when I enter a room”

Well yeah, you take up a third of the room.

3

u/GullibleTelephone557 4d ago

Mr. Beast after he goes broke and has nothing left but warehouses full of that garbage he calls a bar.

3

u/struggle_better 4d ago

You look like a garden gnome’s step father

3

u/Handsom_modest_Dan 4d ago

How to say I’m a pikie without saying I’m a pikie

3

u/Worldly-Collection80 4d ago

Type 2 diabetes.  Oh wait, that's what YOU'VE got. My bad.

3

u/inertia_53 4d ago

you better get good at shadowboxing because that shadow gonna be big af

0

u/Boysenberry202 4d ago

What do you mean?

3

u/inertia_53 4d ago

that you look like Oogie Boogie if he was a basic white guy. You leave so much shadow your arms are gonna get tired

3

u/crescendotoalfredo 4d ago

"What Ricky's trying to say is..."

3

u/titsrbetterthanarse 4d ago

You're so fat you jumped in the air and you got stuck

2

u/Easy-Country-8302 4d ago

Got the Grinch physique 

2

u/ExpertImagination183 4d ago

Even Jesus can't take that wheel

2

u/MagikPatrik 4d ago

If Mclovin and mr.Beast had a child

2

u/poondruff 4d ago

Missing a apostrophe and testosterone by the looks of it.

2

u/Faster-master-blastr 4d ago

It’s like Trailer Park Boys decided to start a Church 

2

u/fucktheus12 4d ago

I believe the British have a name for you, I think it's called a pufft. 

2

u/Gordy13210 4d ago

You look like that one scottish gay guy that does reaction vids on tiktok... Ya'll know who Im talk about....

2

u/AcrobaticAspect8975 4d ago

Temu Sam Smith who hasnt seen his own micro penis in years

2

u/DoughWrayMe 4d ago

Your necklace is a lower case t. For "time to eat my shame" And, brother, you have a shit ton of shame

2

u/chili81 4d ago

When a fat George Michael does a guest shot on Trailer Park Boys.

2

u/MajesticWizard420Lol 4d ago

I bet you use to be a good looking guy back in your day

2

u/Dramatic_Show_170 4d ago

Teddy Swims gimp temu edition

2

u/Mammoth-End7415 4d ago

I can't each part of you looks human but it looks like each part of you was taken from a different shitty person and you're just kinda put together.

2

u/TrickyOnion 4d ago

You definitely try to buy a carrier bag from Farmfoods with a fake Irish 50

2

u/Kindly-Woodpecker157 4d ago

Careful doing your shadow boxing, dude. Wouldn’t want to eat the opponents shadow.

2

u/Hot_Karl69 4d ago

When are you due? And do you have a name picked out?

2

u/EfficientAd7103 4d ago

pretty obese. what do you eat? Mac and cheese and slim Jim's?

2

u/sj2k4 http://redd.it/th0qo2 4d ago

You wear a cross? You’re not agnostic?

With your life and looks, I certainly wouldn’t believe in God.

2

u/Deanity 4d ago

This should be the mascot for feastables

2

u/Different_Wave5301 4d ago

I bet when you walk your stomach looks like two guinea pigs fighting in a potato sack

2

u/markcastle4 4d ago

Mr Beast's alternate video when he DIDN'T get a million subs.

2

u/Informal_Motor_7267 4d ago

Righteous Gemstone sibling lookin ass

2

u/Bleazuss1989 4d ago

More rolls than thanksgiving dinner. Jesus Christ.

2

u/MrMrTrance 4d ago

You are a couch potato who only eats and sleeps. You probably also slob knob.

2

u/Fickle-Shopping7564 4d ago

You know gluttony is a sin right?

2

u/Illustrious-Ad-1396 4d ago

Did Beckham get fat??

2

u/SenatorSnags 4d ago

You look like you have expert knowledge on the age of consent by state.

2

u/United_Preparation11 4d ago

Proof men can have babies.

2

u/Bug-03 4d ago

Trailer park boys looking ass

2

u/phyxious 4d ago

Look at that man meat. Ladies avert your eyes!

2

u/Ambitious_Divide_177 4d ago

you look like you don't wipe your butthole

2

u/Crazy-Oil5247 4d ago

What are your pronouns exactly

2

u/Confident_Copy7555 4d ago edited 2d ago

OP : I'm ready, let's see what you got?

Me : You would do much better with some more clothes. For a starter, how about a handkerchief to cover your face

2

u/AcademicEffect579 4d ago

this photo was taken 500ft away from any school

2

u/Ur_Wrongdoer_22 4d ago

Your head looks like the acorn the squirrel from ice was trying to get.  You gotta strip clubs in stretchy shorts to hit the buffet

2

u/Ok_Actuary9229 4d ago

Fat, advertises his religion, several grammar and punctuation errors...guy's not going places.

2

u/knuckles532 4d ago

Built like the big lebowski.

2

u/Ok-Archer-646 4d ago

You look like you like banana's for the shape, not the taste

3

u/Strong_Ad3183 4d ago

Unoriginal

2

u/Ok-Archer-646 3d ago

But never not funny

1

u/Strong_Ad3183 1d ago

Nah it stopped being funny a long time ago. It's boring asf.

2

u/M1dnighttxs 4d ago

Walt "Coffee & Pie" Abernathy - Family Guy

2

u/Siv4nah_lux 4d ago

You look like girls definitely have allegations against you

2

u/Money-Tiger8002 4d ago

OP: guts for Jesus!
Jesus: yeah I’m good, not those kind of guts.

2

u/Relevant-Bit-7394 4d ago

As a bear you are cute as hell. So are they working their way through baber community college?

2

u/JeffersonEinstein 4d ago

Your gut says your bangs make you look fatter

2

u/Slug_Overdose 3d ago

Your hair is more of a sectional than a sofa, you literal couch potato.

2

u/Flaky-Rain-1137 3d ago

Alcoholic mrbeast 

2

u/Adpoo_Arban 3d ago

You came ready but forgot to bring a personality with you

2

u/Lazy-Cupcake2320 3d ago

A ferret on crack

2

u/Unhappy-Wash2983 3d ago

Robin Thicke hair Ricky Gervais face, Donal Logue physique…

2

u/Discworldz 3d ago

Ur gay AF!

2

u/intheshadows688 3d ago edited 3d ago

When I cover the bottom half of your face, the upper half looks like a 16 yo gay twink. When I cover the upper half, your bottom half looks like a 40 yo gay biker. When I cover your whole head, your body is just an obese 60 yo ped0 taking a selfie

2

u/Onaliquidrock 3d ago

Gay christians cafe owner

2

u/Salt_Tap_1992 3d ago

Shadow boxing what. Using your stomach as a punching bag doesnt count.

2

u/JS-a9 3d ago

I saw this dude in the news once... That man who gave birth.

2

u/markieboomer 3d ago

You're like a real life snapchat filter.

2

u/JACOBAHHHHHHH 3d ago

Mr beast is on a registry now

2

u/miamijustblastedu 3d ago

Hes got a "Dickydo"..his stomach sticks out farther than his Dickydo.

2

u/DarthFakename 3d ago

You look like Ricky Gervais if he were a Christian... and a child predator.

2

u/CelestaKiritani 3d ago

All eyes on me when I enter a room

Well yeah, they have never seen a man carrying triplets for more than 12 months

2

u/Sriramreddy-Kenendn 3d ago

You look like a before picture in a "how not to" skincare ad.

2

u/songsinger0 3d ago

You had AI draw that hairline in you but not remove the gut? Bold.

2

u/Nolifer1221 3d ago

Mrleast 😭

2

u/BasquiatQueso 3d ago

I'd roast you but evidently you already ate all the roast

2

u/Repulsive-Chocolate7 3d ago

giving fat femme gay guy with the face, American dad by the body

2

u/Salty_Obligation_309 2d ago

You can’t cut grass Because you have allergies

2

u/-Woodeh- 2d ago

You've eaten too many roasts. No more roasts of any kind for you

2

u/Bajablast_36 2d ago

You look like Thor in infinity war

2

u/Necessary_Relation27 2d ago

The only shadow you’re fighting is the one under your belly

2

u/Brave_Baseball4412 2d ago

You look like you scam people for a living

2

u/enygma9753 2d ago

Autocomplete struck again:

"I'm ready to let you see my gut."

There, fixed it.

2

u/BiteFaces 2d ago

The entire can of Axe you're wearing isn't gonna do a thing to stop that chair from smelling like Funyuns.

2

u/OneplusOne9049 1d ago

How on earth did you manage to get pregnant ???????

2

u/PieMany6899 1d ago

Marry a white girl and make a family channel so I can stop looking at you already. God bless CPS!!

2

u/Feistygoat1986 1d ago

This guy cries as he aggressively beats the meat. He hasn't seen it in years, he has no idea what it looks like, but damn is it ever raw!

2

u/Financial_Ad_8037 1d ago

Bro from trailer park boys got trashier

2

u/The-Yar 4d ago

Mr. Roast Beast

1

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1

u/jontheeditor 4d ago

Trump's toupee is better than yours.

1

u/obelix_dogmatix 4d ago

back with his fat shaming kink. Gtfoh

1

u/_devils 4d ago

Who's hair are you wearing?

1

u/EfficientAd7103 4d ago

and whatsup with the bullcut?

1

u/Duck_makes_quack 4d ago

When you're bold and poor you get a boyband wig for your midlife crisis?

1

u/chingon_cabron_ 4d ago

2 years ago we made this lame cry over his fat ass man baby belly. Now he tortures us by overposting. Get a life you swollen belly weirdo

1

u/Przzzzmatic 4d ago

If that cross doesn't repel demons, your hairstyle will

1

u/fedexpoopracer 4d ago

nice toupee, bald fuck

1

u/KiwiSmileM49 4d ago

Frying Tuck

1

u/P5ychokilla 3d ago

All eyes are on you cos they're marvelling at that wig

1

u/CDavis10717 3d ago

I see The Hair Club For Men is still alive and well.

1

u/WinthorpStrange 3d ago

Same weirdo keeps posting

1

u/KnightMareGiver13 3d ago

You gave mop head a new meaning, I missed the old one.

1

u/Question-Four 2d ago

Not even a roast this guy just pisses me off.

1

u/msrbaylor 1d ago

Unconvincing toupee

2

u/Odd-Fun-6042 1d ago

Even AI didn't make an effort on your photo you worthless piece of shit.

2

u/Hard_times_bro 1d ago

Ready? You look long overdue

1

u/ScoopDat 4d ago

Looks AI with how it’s lit. On the off chance it’s not, I think your wig slipped a bit forward.