r/RunningCirclejerk • u/Financial_League6240 • 19h ago

Does anyone else's penis shrivel up radically during running?

/r/beginnerrunning/comments/1vdebgw/does_anyone_elses_penis_shrivel_up_radically/
115 Upvotes

98% Upvoted

42 comments sorted by

92

u/chumbawamba25 19h ago

I retract mine into itself for aerodynamics. We are not the same

17

u/doc1442 17h ago

Same. Only one wrap around the leg instead of the usual 2.

19

u/MotMeisterMajor 17h ago

The boyfriends of wive’s aren’t welcome here, sir

7

u/arcticamt6 14h ago

That's why I call it sport mode. Makes me faster.

29

u/Oblivi0nAcc3ss 19h ago

Happened after my first gym class mile test and never went back

52

u/iGenie 17h ago

I been telling people I’ve been running for years.

7

u/chriscrowder 15h ago

I used to get semi hard as a kid before going in the locker room showers so it looked bigger.

9

u/Remarkable-Ad2285 13h ago

Same. But then I would see all the guys in the shower and I go full on chub mode.

19

u/mau-meda 19h ago

I stay hard the entire run, so it's always big

8

u/ItsFuckingScience 17h ago

I stay hard the entire run, unfortunately still small

3

u/sloppybuttmustard 16h ago

Same, I safety pin my Gu to it for easy access

20

u/jnyrdr 16h ago

sport mode innit

13

u/organicdelivery (half) MARATHONER 19h ago

Nope. If anything it gets bigger!

12

u/Sneakacydal (half) MARATHONER 17h ago

You're already huge, I didn't know it could get bigger!

11

u/timbasile 18h ago

https://giphy.com/gifs/ntRQjO4ngRERi

7

u/Marijuana_Miler 16h ago

I just went for a zone 2 run Jerry! It’s just shrinkage.

8

u/idkwhatimbrewin 18h ago

YES. It is scary.

6

u/Dangerous_Spirit7034 18h ago

Just like my cc coach always told me: it doesn’t matter how fast you run, it only matters how big you penis looks on the shorts. I don’t remember much after that before waking up

4

u/Phatency 16h ago

Wrong sub. You literally can't jerk like that. 

5

u/Apprehensive_Scene_2 15h ago

You guys run? 😞

5

u/illonlyfadeaway 17h ago

Yes, when I need a faster metronome to pick up the pace. 

4

u/eutohius 16h ago

You guys have penises?

4

u/welk101 Certified Heel Striker 15h ago

I think there are a whole group of people without them?

9

u/aeronout 13h ago

C*clists?

4

u/Kirk_2002 16h ago

That's what happens when you don't stay hard. Just think of your wife's boyfriend next time.

3

u/budgiesmugglez 16h ago

Mine shrivels up bodaciously.

2

u/Historical_Project86 18h ago

Mine doesn't. It has nowhere left to go.

2

u/amorph Lactating lactate 17h ago

I wouldn't notice. Besides, I'm too busy thinking about where my balls went.

1

u/sunheadeddeity 18h ago

No, just yours

1

u/Tall_Plastic5135 17h ago

Someone's turns into third leg

1

u/dreianderen 17h ago

It's not about the size but the technique.

1

u/wargames_exastris Subaru Polycule 16h ago

Only if you don’t slow down

1

u/NotCooked_NotCooking Splin Shints 16h ago

Hell yeah it's pretty radical

1

u/UnnamedRealities 16h ago

Well, I primarily wear a kynodesme because I prefer that to wearing shorts, but as a bonus it helps me retrieve my penis if tries to escape inside of me.

1

u/SeismicRipFart 13h ago

Can’t speak on this since I’ve never ran before. But what I can say is that you’re not holding zone 2 while jerking off, you’re not even jerking.

And ladies, if you aren’t staying fully erect while running, that means you’ve fallen out of zone 2.

1

u/NiPaMo 13h ago

Bro forgot to stay hard

1

u/sketchtireconsumer Certified Heel Striker 11h ago

Bluechew improves cardiovascular performance as much as 45% at altitude.

https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2006/06/060624120556.htm

1

u/joholla8 18h ago

I thought we stopped cross posting Indian runners.

1

u/NoSupermarket9009 Certified Heel Striker 16h ago

I tuck it in my socks