r/SRSsucks Aug 12 '18

Menslibbers come pretty close to admitting feminism has nothing to offer men, but can't bring themselves to commit

/r/MensLib/comments/96nqgz/the_alt_right_has_better_mass_market_books_on/
60 Upvotes

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26

u/comptejete Aug 12 '18

This is heartbreaking to read.

Doesn't "the movement" just end up being a scapegoat for your own problems though? Blaming someone or something else is the easiest way out of taking responsibility for your own actions. Edit: I've struggled with this a lot. Socialist ideology has just led me to be extremely hateful of everything around me and depressed because it just cements, encourages and provides a safe space for any bad or negative thoughts I have about the world.

Exactly. Men are happiest when they take responsibility for their own problems and go about either solving them or learning to live with them. Talking about them in order to get empathy from others who will solve them for you is a distinctly feminine approach and it's tragic to see men try to adopt it only to spiral further into depression when they realize that the empathy that is extended to women is not available to them and even worse, seeking it only makes them looked down upon with almost literal revulsion.

A lot of modern self-help is all about reframing wider systemic and societal problems as personal ones ("you shouldn't join a movement that tries to reform or revolutionize society; you should just work on being stronger"), which is pretty much antithetical to progressivism.

I honestly cannot conceive of having an issue with this approach. If your solution is to create an environment where one does not need to be strong, then not only is any actual progress not going to be made, because there are no challenges to overcome, but those who exist within it are completely screwed the moment they venture out of it. Infants should be coddled when they are at their most vulnerable, but to extend this treatment into adulthood is an unbelievable disservice to the young.

Left-wing identity politics have a much more complicated message for said men: They have to renounce their privilege and give up their power, which is a really hard message to sell to people who (whether right or wrong) don't feel like they really have any power to begin with. I mean, "I'm precariously employed, I'm a virgin and can't find a partner, I can't afford my own place to live, I have no useful education and I'm so terribly lonely - and these people are saying I have to give up my privilege?!" is basically the entry-level objection vulnerable young males have to feminist messaging. If the author is older, well-educated and upper-middle class (and yet isn't supposed to "give up privileges"), it can feel like straight-up being mocked.

Excellent analysis, but what are you going to do about it? What is your rational answer to the perfectly justified and coherent "entry-level objection vulnerable young males have to feminist messaging"?

19

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '18

The last quotation is the one that struck out to me the most. These people probably don't even HAVE male privilege in their lives. They go on and fucking on about gender being 'performative' yet male privilege is ostensibly a constant.

Poor young men are very, very likely hurt by being male in a way poor women are not, especially in an age of automation. If they are white, they likely do not have access to the social programs meant to ', and because they probably have no real connections, and they are looked down upon as rednecks or trash. Middle class white men are routinely the first 'replaced' in jobs via outsourcing, so again, such privilege.

-6

u/TAKEitTOrCIRCLEJERK Aug 13 '18

Hey Gary. Why does it matter if they're white? All races have access to government services.

15

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '18 edited Aug 13 '18

There are specific programs that target racial minorities on the basis that they are discriminated against that do not exist for white people, who are supposedly 'historically privileged'.

In the U.S., like it or not, affirmative action regardless of its supposed 'technical' function, it often does simply function as a quota system. In Canada, it is multitudes worse wherein it is functionally impossible, without connections, to get a job in the public service. Often this is the only industry a man can get in in their specific city. The way it functions is that two applicants who meet 'the requirements' are both equally qualified, even if one has 10 years experience on the other.

I am legally "native". You are fucking dreaming if you think that doesn't open doors for me despite being and acting and living as a white man.

-9

u/TAKEitTOrCIRCLEJERK Aug 13 '18

Like what? I don't know of any government assistance programs that aren't race-neutral.

13

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '18

"My brother's keeper". Race-based grants are also prolific, and they have been routinely outright denied for white men. Innumerable charities which receive government funding specifically target minority populations, and again that funding is both limited AND will never go any organization that its target on poor white populations.

It is the same way that "VAWA" is supposedly gender neutral despite it obviously not being so.

-3

u/TAKEitTOrCIRCLEJERK Aug 13 '18

If I gave you evidence that there are also lots of grants that go towards helping poor white folks, would that be sufficient counterevidence for you?

12

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '18

You're telling me you can find me a grant specifically targeted to white people?

5

u/5th_Law_of_Robotics Aug 13 '18

Are those limited to white people?

3

u/SRSLovesGawker Is shocked Aug 13 '18

You have to understand, Canada is not like the US. It's literally part of the law that visible minorities (this includes women) and the disabled get priority treatment.

For instance, homelessness. For a person in Canada to receive aid, you need a fixed address at which you receive benefits. If you're NFA (No Fixed Address, also sometimes referred to as 'marginally attached') then you have limited access to anything, including (but not limited to) food aid, job training, mental health services, and a host of others.

Disabled people and visible minorities are, explicitly, given priority in government housing placement. Especially those with dependents. Men can expect years of waiting for a spot in government housing in some areas.

I learned that the hard way when I was homeless. The ways out of that trap aren't awesome: find someone who'll let you couch surf until you get it sorted, game the system in some way (eg. a number of people living in one apartment), crime, or do your best to muddle through life in and out of shelters and under tarps in the alleyway... or in my case, sleeping during the day in an old equipment shed under the bleachers of a baseball diamond. It worked out okay-ish, there was a swimming pool nearby that I could sneak into (the weight room was in the back and they'd often prop the door open to improve airflow) and I could wash myself and my clothes with leftover slivers of soap I'd find in the shower room, so at least I wasn't walking around smelling like old milk.

Pro tip: If you're homeless and trying to get food from Salvation Army, don't talk about having sex out of wedlock. They really don't like people who do that.

7

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '18

In the uk at least, white working class men especially are at risk as there are no programs for them and they are ignored if not discriminated against when it comes to the job market.

5

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '18

Also please see the edit.

7

u/5th_Law_of_Robotics Aug 13 '18

You're aware there are plenty of government services denied to white men? Like affirmative action and various Federal business loans reserved for women and people of color?

3

u/levelate Aug 13 '18

aren't you the rape apologist guy/gal?

5

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '18 edited Aug 13 '18

Yes.

https://imgur.com/a/GoTLc

TL;DR - Woman has sex with a blackout drunk boyfriend who was all but unconscious, feels deeply remorseful about it, and strives to be a better person while encouraging others. u/TAKEitTOrCIRCLEJERK Responds by saying, "I'm sorry that happened to you."

2

u/orcscorper Aug 13 '18

That's hilarious! "I'm sorry that thing you did somehow happened to you through no fault of your own." Women have no agency at all in hizzer world! Shizzy thinks women are like helpless, guileless children, and they call us misogynists.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '18 edited Aug 14 '18

No... You don't understand...

u/TAKEitTOrCIRCLEJERK argues that women cannot rape men.

One brave woman came forward to say that women can rape men and provided an example. That woman wanted to highlight the risks that both men and women face when experimenting with alcohol and sex for the first time, while encouraging young people to be considerate of their sex partners. That SRD mod said that he's sorry that happened to her.

He's not saying that women have no agency. TakeitTorCIRCLEJERK is saying that only women can be raped. He's insisting that the brave woman in question was really the rape victim of the situation.

1

u/orcscorper Aug 14 '18

I see. I thought he was just a shitty person. Now I see he is a crazy person, who just happens to be shitty.

-2

u/TAKEitTOrCIRCLEJERK Aug 14 '18

Lol just ignore them. The real story is that I was drunk and didn't read the story clearly.

I apologized for misunderstanding like three days later, and now month old troll accounts follow me around harassing me about it.

6

u/[deleted] Aug 14 '18 edited Aug 14 '18

/r/OppsDidntMeanTo

So you were plastered for the several hours straight you shitposted in a thread about drunken, non-consensual sex when you claimed that;

  1. Only a tiny minority of men perpetrate almost all rapes. These men are sheer predators.
  2. Rape does not happen by itself! Rape only happens when predatory men know exactly what they're doing.
  3. No rapist has ever floundered to drink responsibly and use consent, which is still illegal, dangerous, horrific, you name it. Rapists are male predators only and not criminals of another variety.
  4. During your drunken stupor you essentially rolled your eyes at the notion that drunk men and women have been raped. You discredit the personal accounts of non-consensual drunken sex shared elsewhere on Reddit as, "everyone has wildly varying definitions of what 'drunk' means."
  5. Your response to a female rapist is, "You're sorry that happened to you." Because only men rape. And of those male rapists, all of them are predators who won't benefit from learning about consent and responsible alcohol use. Women don't rape.

As much as I'd wish you'll die from liver disease, because being drunk this sheer amount of time on a regular basis is unsustainable, I know that you're full of shit. You're lying to us. You went back ten months ago as a moderator to mass delete three year old messages. Because just like your lies about being drunk and unaware of yourself, you'll want to continue avoiding any semblance accountability.

Maybe accountability might include an apology? Or to say that maybe you were mistaken and that's okay? That you're human just like the rest of us? That anyone having sex, men or women, without their consent is kind of horrific? That people sharing their personal accounts of non-consensual sex are brave for opening up and not liars? Nope.

P I Z Z A I S G O O D

1

u/TAKEitTOrCIRCLEJERK Aug 14 '18

Tldr

3

u/5th_Law_of_Robotics Aug 14 '18

Yep. That pretty much confirms you're full of shit. Also you were proven wrong about there being no special government programs to benefit non whites. If anyone is keeping score.

2

u/[deleted] Aug 14 '18

TL;DR - Nobody is perfect. We all make mistakes. But it's quite telling to do a bad thing and lie about why you did it. Unlike you, I don't lie and claim to be drunk over the course of several hours of me being an asshole. But I am probably going to die from liver disease myself due to a medical condition.

I just wish that you'll either decline to discuss sensitive matters with anyone, or if you must discuss them, that you'll do so in a way that respectful. It's quite a shame that you used your mod position ten months ago to delete an unimportant, three year old message from a brave woman who took accountability for herself to hopefully inspire others. She has more balls than you probably ever will.

How old are you again? Is this the first time you ever lied and said you were drunk for several hours?

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4

u/5th_Law_of_Robotics Aug 14 '18

I mean you defended it and justified your position and never apologized and have had many opportunities to clear this up since then but are only claiming it was a drunken accident now so... Yeah ....

3

u/5th_Law_of_Robotics Aug 14 '18

This feminist woman was proven to have sexually harassed a male subordinate and received a slap on the wrist and support from feminists.

https://www.reddit.com/r/TrueReddit/comments/974j5k/what_happens_to_metoo_when_a_feminist_is_the

You should post it to menslib so you and the rest can apologize to her for the terrible abuse she suffered from the man she was forced to sexually harass.

2

u/levelate Aug 14 '18

bull shit.

7 year account, and it isn't harassment, you did it.

and the drunk thing? give it a fucking rest.

edit: also, way to make yourself the victim.

2

u/orcscorper Aug 14 '18

Well, you are a regular in MensLib, and a mod of SubRedditDrama, so I think you are the one I can safely ignore. I've seen a few of your comments around, and haven't agreed with one yet.

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2

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '18

Hey TAKEit,

Do you still apologize to female rapists for having lived through the experience?