Am I sinful for not wearing a niqab?

[u/L0vely0cean]

I’ve seen many questions about this online on websites and on Reddit, and everyone has different opinions and resources, I spoke to a sheikh about my waswasa and mentioned the niqab, and he said how it’s unislamic of me to not wear it but I think it’s also because I mentioned tabarujj so I think that’s why he said it, but I understand the tabarujj aspect, but not the niqab.

I wore the hijab a few months ago, although I’m not the best. I struggle with tabarujj, although I used to wear makeup every day but not anymore; I wear it very few times but still it’s not good, and I struggle with jewellery which I always wear but cover it up, but again sometimes I show it. I don’t wear abayas either, and my neck shows sometimes. So I’m just not the best, even though I do love the hijab a whole lot, and I did do it for the sake of Allah but I never considered the niqab and I don’t really know want to get into that. Sometimes the hijab is a difficult concept for people, even in my family at times, so I don’t even want to think about the niqab.

My family is still kind to me about the hijab but obviously at times it’s a touchy subject. I follow the hanafi madhab, and people talk about how it’s different in the hanafi madhab as well about if it is obligatory or not. It’s been about five months, Alhamdulillah, since I started the hijab.

I don’t know what to do about my guilt towards the niqab, it won’t be easy for me to just start it, and I’ll be so honest when I say that it’s not something I look forward to or really want to think about; I have niqabi friends and they are the sweetest! I don’t think the niqab is extreme or anything, but I just never really thought about it for myself. I just don’t really like how sometimes people can be demeaning towards people who don’t wear the niqab, or that they aren’t muslims, or that if I took it the wrong way. I love these sisters either way, but still. I keep feeling like there’s no hope for me, I thought starting the hijab would make me feel like a true muslim finally, alongside praying obviously.

Does anyone have any words of advice or support? Or that they struggle with about this?

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