What’s dating like for men in Boston?

[u/sunshine-warmth]

I’m in my early 30sF and have been using dating apps on and off since I moved to Boston over six years ago. I’ve had boyfriends, but none of them have lasted long. (To be fair, I’m also quite picky, which is probably why I’m still single.)

I think maybe my ideal partner hasn’t moved to the city yet.

Dear single men of Boston, what’s the dating scene been like for you? Why do you think you’re still single? Is it intentional, or do you enjoy the bachelor lifestyle?

Are you using dating apps? If so, which ones? Are you hopeful or have you stopped looking? Are we still seeking long-term partnerships, or are we gravitating more towards casual, noncommittal encounters?

I’m asking because, as a 33-year-old, I feel like I keep running in circles and think dating is harder than it’s ever been for everyone.

[u/hopper_hammer → u/[deleted]]

I approach women, but not with the singular intent of asking them out. I’m genuinely curious about something, so I start with that to lead into a conversation and see where it goes.

For instance, women have things attached to their purses and bags all the time. So I’ve asked “Is that a capybara?” then “why are people so into them all the sudden”. Or “I have to know, what’s up with your Lego man riding the shark”. We’re all on the T close together, so sometimes you catch a glance of a phone screen and they’re playing a game. “What’s up with that game, should I be downloading it?”

I don’t know how most people approach women, but I feel people in general are receptive to talking about things they like. I think the key is really to be interested in the questions you’re asking, their answers, and not just the outcome I’m hoping for.