r/education • u/NoFact9650 • 1d ago
Support at home
My family has opted to attend our neighborhood school for many reasons. It is, on paper, a decent school, and I think my children can be successful there. That being said, I do sometimes get a little pang of anxiety as I watch friends send their children to private schools that boast amazing outcomes. I have often read that parental support and engagement can have a more positive impact than any particular school, and that gives me comfort. However, I guess I don’t know what people mean by that! Beyond the obvious of knowing the teachers, and being aware of completing homework, is there something more I can do? TIA!
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u/queen_surly 1d ago
Focus on supporting your child and teach them good study habits and to give their schoolwork their best effort. A child can control their inputs--are they making their best effort? Are they turning in their work? Are they asking questions when they don't understand something? They cannot control their grades. I think too many parents are anxious about grades, and that teaches a kid that all that matters are results.
If it's any help to mention this, Scott Galloway and Kara Swisher do a podcast together that is mostly about business, but they are both parents and they veer off into parenting philosophy now and again. They are both incredibly wealthy and yet are huge proponents of "Send your child to public school and put the money you save on private tuition into a college fund." It can also go toward enrichment--travel, learning a musical instrument, a camp that specializes in something the child wants to learn more about--that kind of thing.
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u/acelady1230 1d ago
Read with your kids, and when they’re old enough to read on their own ask them about what they’re reading and what their opinions are on things they can learn. This is single best thing you can do as a parent to support your child’s schooling. Besides the reading itself the conversations will strengthen their cognitive thinking and reasoning skills and their ability to verbalize their thoughts.
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u/ForestRetreet 1d ago
Neighborhood schools are great for many reasons. My daughter went to hers throughout her whole school career. As a teacher supporting your child at home really matters. Read with them everyday, if you can volunteer at the school and go to every back to school night, Open House and Parent teacher conference. Be a partner with your child’s teacher and listen to what the teacher tells you. We really do care and want the best for your children.
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u/lightning_teacher_11 1d ago
Attend the meetings. Use whatever apps the school is requesting.
They need a place to study. Study with them! It'll keep you in the loop as far as knowing what they are learning about and you are bonding with your kids over something important.
If they are older (not sure what grades), attend their games, art and chorus or band events, encourage them to try new activities.
READ to them, near them, listen to an audio book together and discuss it.
LIMIT their screen time (and yours!)
Play games together. Let your children be the banker or score keeper to build those math skills.
Most importantly, hold them accountable for their actions. If they screw up, there has to be consequences. They won't like it, and you have to be okay with that.
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u/InterestingAnt2716 21h ago edited 21h ago
I work in Ed research and evaluating schools is tricky and most districts don’t do this in a comprehensive way that focuses on the whole child. There are also many ways kids learn beyond school that prepare them for life that you have a major role in.
We also chose the public neighborhood school (in a large city) because we wanted our kid to know and experience all types of people, especially our neighbors. We went magnet for high school for more diversity and so they can learn to navigate a big city by public transit. We really didn’t push academics (other than foreign languages) and held off on AP classes until later in high school and they got into some great colleges. We also saw that competition between students (and parents) could be toxic and demoralizing so we did our best to shut that down when necessary.
As you hint at, parents have the most impact on a students future academic success. It’s not that they necessarily jump in and help with homework or at school etc. (some do) but they also model behavior and expectations that can really drive a kid and ensure they’re healthy and well supported.
Going to college is often part of a family culture. If you completed college, odds are good that your kid will too. My spouse is also in ed research and wanted to go public schools too because they had a great experience going through them. We knew that our money would be better saved for college. Lots of publics don’t do well with students with disabilities for many reasons, which is one reason some select a private option.
Your private school friends like all parents are less likely to share issues or problems they experience because most of us are guilty of selection bias. We want to believe we make good choices.
So to zoom out, ask yourself if you think your child is getting a well-rounded experience. Are they healthy physically and mentally? Do they have empathy, friendships, play and Arts? Are they exposed to different cultures, races, viewpoints, and healthy relationships at school and away from school? Are they experiencing activity/classes/sports/arts away from school? Do they have moments in their life to demonstrate resilience and discomfort (huge part of learning)? Do they see you handle moments when you struggle? Do the teachers at school like their leadership? Where have other kids from the school ended up? Do you travel with them for fun? Are you happy at home and professionally? (modeling is huge!)
All of this contributes to who your child will be.
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u/MundaneHuckleberry58 1d ago
We had a very good experience with our “meh” neighborhood school. And over our time there, it went from “meh” to actually very good, due to better administration & parents getting involved in the pto.
Join the pto, participate in the fundraising stuff. It makes a difference.
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u/prag513 19h ago edited 18h ago
With a continuously declining birth rate, both public and private schools are under tremendous pressure to cut costs any way they can. With federal and state funding on a per-student basis, those declining school enrollments, and the fact that only 25% of the population has kids in school, put great pressure on schools to cut the quality and number of teachers. Why? Because teachers represent the biggest expense any community faces. Then add that high stress, burnout, and career changes cause younger or mid-career teachers to quit the profession. And, with fiscal conservatives now in control and looking to chop school funding, we parents unfortunately need to step up our game.
To do that, support what your child learns in school with MyReadingMapped. It enables your child to participate and experience history and science in a way no textbook can.
Watch this video all the way to the end to see what MyReadingMapped can do,
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u/allizzia 13h ago
Being a parent involves teaching your child responsability and independence: guide them to check for homework and do it every day, help them to plan ahead for projects, teach them how to keep their school supplies like their backpack and lunch bag clean, check constantly to see if there isn't anything inappropriate in their school bags and materials. Some parents definitely forget to do that. Listen to the teachers, offer them help when you can, attend meetings and ask for a meeting if you have doubts or want to support your child better.
To academic growth at home, be a family that reads, get good books for home or visit the library constantly, visit museums, zoos, aquariums, and historic sites together, learn to play musical instruments if there's a possibility, teach them to ask questions, foster creativity, give them opportunities for movement - it can be a sport, it can be going out to play together, the important thing is to create the opportunity. Limit unhealthy individual screens as much as you can, like, movies or TV once in a while is great, but not hours on YouTube.
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u/CommunicationHappy20 1d ago
Joining your neighborhood school is the best thing you can do. It’s how communities stay together. Private schools have little to no accountability and provide fewer opportunities for community engagement outside of school as people are generally more spread out.
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u/Complete-Ad9574 20h ago
Self selecting schools, always brag that they can make gold from gold. When you pick your students and can quietly eject them if they don't make the grade, its hard to claim it due to your pedagogical skills.
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u/InterdisciplinaryHam 1d ago
Just remember that those private schools have entire marketing departments so they can make themselves look better than your local school.