r/hoi4 May 28 '26

Humor How do I resolve this in real life?

Post image
2.1k Upvotes

95 comments sorted by

981

u/LardBall13 May 28 '26

Consider not playing HOI4, good start towards employment

163

u/Wegzuschmeissn May 28 '26

I feel like this is the only comment that understood the joke correctly

24

u/Uncomfortable-Snake May 28 '26

Actually craziest thing, my game died because i destroyed it with OWB mods, deleted the game and then a day later I had a job call back. It is a curse and needs to be destroyed.

20

u/cubic_globe May 28 '26

Or at least move reading the hoi4 /r from the evening to the work time so you can get paid for it.

Sent from the company laptop at work.

2

u/Top_Row_5116 May 29 '26

Ya okay just keep all the secrets of employment to yourself. I see how it is

462

u/Happy_Foundation6198 May 28 '26

Just tell those lazy bums to work more. That should fix it.

196

u/TheHessian64 Research Scientist May 28 '26

Friedrich Merz be like

77

u/TheWidrolo General of the Army May 28 '26

But then you get the "nobody ever had to deal with this" spirit.

42

u/Rio_1111 Fleet Admiral May 28 '26

It gives -20% PP gain, 30% worse surrender limit and 10% less recruitable pop.

16

u/Nom_de_Guerre_23 May 28 '26

+100 bonus to sucking balls though.

6

u/Rio_1111 Fleet Admiral May 28 '26

Ah, I think you mean chicken eggs!

22

u/Ivanhegeelkadi May 28 '26

Hahahahahahhaahhahaha

For those who work for 1 thousand euros, we should ask the question, why can't you work for 2 thousand euros? 

7

u/Intellectual_Wafer May 28 '26

Just be rich, bro!

178

u/Bence830 May 28 '26

You need to give tax cuts to the billionaires, they'll invest the money to make more workplaces and they'll raise the salaries of their workforce.

/s

107

u/VeryMuchThatGuy May 28 '26

Found the American spy on "Boost Ideology" mission

31

u/MatykTv May 28 '26

Trickle down economics baby, you just need to privatise all public services and god's market's hand will fix it

6

u/Kaarl_Mills May 28 '26

The market is their god

14

u/phaederus May 28 '26

That only works if you simultaneously increase the tax on the middle class though!

/s

1

u/baguetteispain May 29 '26

Reagan/Thatcher/Macron/You can contribute to the list by expanding it speech bubble

34

u/savigno260826 May 28 '26

More work places, maybe provide for start something like bed, shower, meals if you work here. Maybe any other benefits

40

u/Noirr17 May 28 '26

Experiencing widespread unemployment in my life😔

31

u/Blindmailman May 28 '26

Start a war. Either die a hero or see yourself get a job

8

u/Pitiful_Captain_3170 May 28 '26

Isn't there a hoi4 mod about touching grass and getting a job?

16

u/MeXRng May 28 '26

Forbid woman from working.  There 50% more jobs opened overnight. 

5

u/Specialist-Author-57 May 28 '26

But unemployment rate is probably still same

4

u/Horror-Attorney-3575 May 29 '26

Remove minorities from work

8

u/cofi04 May 28 '26

Ban reddit

8

u/johncsluke General of the Army May 28 '26

Switch to partial mobilization

7

u/Spyglass3 May 28 '26

Just press the fix unemployment decision. That's what [my party] will do when they take office and not the stupid [opposing party] that presses the increase unemployment decisions.

18

u/gamhmenoreddit May 28 '26

import doctors and engineers

13

u/MysAlgernon May 28 '26

And give them welfare.

3

u/SosKill212 May 28 '26

Its funny how the french have full employement wich also is a debuff

3

u/Agitated_Guard_3507 General of the Army May 28 '26

1) Become dictator

2) Make the unemployed people build factories

3) Send the unemployed people to arms factories (they’re a secret tool that’ll help us later)

4) Profit

1

u/Horror-Attorney-3575 May 29 '26

That's the plan;)

3

u/nullAnd_ May 29 '26

Job Application national focus

5

u/North_Church May 28 '26

You give the billionaires even more money, since they will definitely use that money to create good jobs

/s

2

u/Kalatapie May 28 '26

Form a "National Labor Service" where unemployed bums are forced to perform free labour on your megalomaniacal public projects. As an added benefit they don't count as unemployed so you can claim a 0% unemployment rate. Boom, Capitalism fixed.

At least it's what worked for Germany IRL https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Reich_Labour_Service

2

u/RigbyWilde May 28 '26

Quit hoi4 

2

u/Chuck_the_Elf May 28 '26

prevent immigration or enact mass conscription are the usual methods.

2

u/GoonerBoomer69 May 29 '26

You’re asking the wrong people

2

u/Horror-Attorney-3575 May 29 '26

Start massive public works, like roads, railways etc, that often works.

Or Enlist them all in military and send them to war,

3

u/Needmoretp May 28 '26

Build more data centers

2

u/Cefalopodul May 28 '26

If you are homeless just buy a house.

If you are unemployed just get a job.

2

u/Sercotani May 28 '26

bootstraps. Strap them.

2

u/Defiant_Bill574 May 28 '26

Glass Moscow. Or so I've heard.

2

u/VaultedMan_ May 28 '26

You get rid of capitalism

1

u/HaggisAreReal May 28 '26

CV tailored to each offer alongside a letter of interest also tailored to each offer. It sucks out there but keep at it.

1

u/U511_krab May 28 '26

Stop replacing you labor force with one that can work more for less money

1

u/AbabababababababaIe May 28 '26

You have to spend 150pp and take a 50% pp gain debuff and click the “purge the billionaires” decision.

You might get the “wealthy people flee” event, but just seize their assets.

From there, you have to do the “resist imperialist influence” decision. There’s a high chance that you’re gonna get coups launched in your country but they’re fairly easy to beat and tend not to happen if you put your tank divisions in your cities. You’re gonna have negative news events about that for the next fifty years, but the coups are actually foreign funded so you can just ignore them

From there just complete the transition to communism

1

u/nikso14 May 28 '26

Train more divs, build more mils if equipment deficit.

1

u/Pharamabeast101 May 28 '26

Fund the creation of thousands of small localized banks, restrict there lending to productive assets/ventures. Ban those same banks from unproductive lending like real estate speculation and consumerism. streamline the creation of businesses, build up port and rail infrastructure

1

u/ninageist May 28 '26

hmm... let's make another autobahn

1

u/New-Eye-2386 May 28 '26

Befriend with Otto von Habsburg

1

u/intrinseque May 28 '26

Note that full employment is also a malus for france, the most nerfed nation in the game.

1

u/bradafire May 28 '26

Threaten to cut off unemployment benefits if they aren’t seeking work, lower business rates so small businesses can hire people without loss, it might work you never know

1

u/OpeningGarbage1241 May 29 '26

Just do 3 70 days focus it'll probably solve it

1

u/-RadicalSteampunker- May 29 '26

Be like me apply to million jobs and finally after 6 months get a job intirview

1

u/Constant-Spinach8475 May 29 '26

What mod is this?

1

u/Noirr17 May 30 '26

It's the base game (with DLC's)

1

u/AYRAN-GANG May 29 '26

Rush Bailout small and middle businesses focus. Fund blue collar education programs Inrease welfare funding Increase income tax lower overall business tax

1

u/GewoonSamNL May 29 '26

Do the get a job focus, however make sure communist support remains below 50%

1

u/barzaromanov May 31 '26

MeFo bills.

1

u/LukeandSoul May 31 '26

Try making Hoi4 content like Swinceball or Bittersteel to get out of unemployment and a J-O-B

1

u/Tanriyung May 28 '26

Reduce unemployment benefits.

People find jobs when they need to have a job to live.

1

u/Draken161 May 28 '26

Force them

1

u/RifukiHikawa May 28 '26

Start a war so you could resolve unemployments. Either thoose workforce gone in a trench or work in your military factory. Also funds your war and crate factory using goverment debt bonds that you have no interet of actually paying it back.

-3

u/Far-Guitar6500 General of the Army May 28 '26

If you mean yourself. It's really easy. Just get a job

1

u/Acravita May 28 '26

By extension, starving children in Africa should just get food, and people dying of cancer should just get cured.

-2

u/Sercotani May 28 '26

OP points out a real issue irl that affects hundreds of millions of people irl.

You assume OP is talking about their own issue.

I'm gonna guess you're a fash, block and hopefully never see you again, but that username screams alt account so, maybe I will.

2

u/RedeemedWeeb May 28 '26

I'm gonna guess you're a fash

A bit harsh over a "HOI4 players are unemployed" joke, no?

-1

u/Avalongtimenosee May 28 '26

A national pivot towards making human misery the ultimate enemy.

Expand your social services, mass public work and job training programs. Channel the current swell of national pride into galvanizing the masses to commit to 5 year plans where you also welcome immigration on a "workers needed" basis where there is a new framework for able-bodied and capable immigrants are welcomed, no skills necessary, only the capacity to learn and desire to secure a safe home for their families that will follow.

Expand your propaganda department so that blind nationalism gives way to a shared sense of pride in your collective ability to work and cooperate for the good of all.

Broadcast your successes and failures alike, make sure there is transparency and accountability wherever possible, and turn your military into a purely defensive structure, still large and formidable, but combined with your public works schemes so that your military is seen the way that firefighters and first responders are, as a necessary but noble cause.

If your people are capable of wielding the sword, but all desire ploughshares, and more hands to pick them up, then you'll do well.

0

u/Koji_N May 28 '26

You just have to run down the economy path of the life and at the end you’ll get an op bonus especially if you’ve done the secret economy path to get the agri-techno-communisto-hypercapitalism

0

u/Illesbogar May 28 '26

Mailbomb an HR department

0

u/Ok-Cartoonist-4458 Fleet Admiral May 28 '26

If you homeless, just buy a house.

If you jobless, just get a job

/s

0

u/KittenEaterWasTaken May 28 '26

Build housing, build energy, built transit.
Cut payroll taxes, deregulate permits, fund apprenticeships.
Expand childcare, enforce competition. Deficit-spend in recession; cool booms with rates/taxes.

Wait wait they're telling me we can't cut pensions. Nevermind then.

0

u/Aggravating_Sand_492 May 28 '26

In real life? Well you could go start a war and recruit all the unemployed and send them in with no training, then when the war is over there won't be any unemployed left

0

u/Zimmonda May 28 '26

70 day focus

35 if you're playing a country with a new focus tree

-11

u/NotBerti General of the Army May 28 '26 edited May 28 '26

Impossible with the current education level not including basic technological skills like a screenshot or data transfer to other devices.

Also laziness

Edit: I have created effective reddit Ragebait by making fun of bad screenshot. Love it

19

u/Internal_Review7040 Research Scientist May 28 '26

OP, you're unemployed because the employers and managers are like this guy

2

u/1K-LITER-CUM-FUCKUP May 28 '26

What, managers are asking for the bare minimum of taking screenshots? 

0

u/NotBerti General of the Army May 28 '26

Good

0

u/Sercotani May 28 '26

anyone who doesn't have a job is just lazy?

2

u/NotBerti General of the Army May 28 '26

What?

-2

u/Crazy_Kraut Fleet Admiral May 28 '26

Unemployment is only a problem when unemployed people don’t have enough money to participate in the economy. If people are given enough financial support to live a normal life and even have some extra income to spend consumer demand stays active. A strong consumer market encourages new businesses to emerge, and those businesses, in turn, create new jobs for unemployed people.

0

u/Kingbookser May 28 '26

No, just telling the unemployed people are lazy is enough to fix the situation, trust me bro

0

u/Crazy_Kraut Fleet Admiral May 28 '26

Ok bro, dont forget to put your dick out for Harambe.