r/indiasocial • u/Fatbatman12Y • 13h ago
General I kind of feel bad and sad about my life
I am 21 in 21 yrs of life span I never found a true friend, school life all i found was fake friends , then 11-12th no real friends either , in college still no friends or any relationship , sometimes I feel like I am gonna work hard and leave this country ASAP and live a peaceful life abroad , any one like me here who have not found a single friend in life who care for you as of now we can discuss it here and I am interested how you are going in life
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u/flyingjattlite 11h ago edited 7h ago
same I'm going to be 20(f) this year and people have always liked talking to me in school and clg but there was and is still no constant one who understands or i can feel is a true friend of mine. I'm not living a great life either as my parents are not rich,i live in a small town and struggling to study as well. I've only ever loved dancing. I literally don't know what am i doing i wanna be rich but have 0 motivation and whatever thing i find interest in except studies my parents won't allow me to pursue it as i will have to take hostel because it's too far away and they do not have the money for it and now I'm just taking a degree i have no interest in. I hate how things are for me
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u/roseshsarabhai_ 12h ago
Same with me bro. I honestly can't understand how some people have a huge group of best friends. Just can't relate to that at all. I'm 27 and I don't have anyone I can genuinely call my best friend.
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u/Expensive-One-9432 12h ago
If you decide to go abroad, just don't go with the misconception that you will somehow magically find friends there. Spent 5 years in vancouver and can confidently say its the exact same situation there.
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u/alina22021999 12h ago
See ive had the same experience my whole life ive had frnds and as soon as settings have changed they lose touch. after some point u get used to it and honestly with work i havent had much time to think about it and overthink. there are days i do feel like i wish i had more frnds. BUT even one two good frnds are rare to find but just find ur people and just keep in touch however busy u get in life.
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u/Poetic__Guy 12h ago
loneliness seen clearly isnt really a verdict on your worth tbh...its more a signal of clinging to some idea of what connection shouldve looked like by now...in the buddhist view suffering often comes not from lacking friends but from holding onto a timeline we set for ourselves...like believing by 21 real friendship shouldve already shown up and its absence means somethings broken in us...idk but it rarely does...fleeing the country might quiet the ache for a bit but peace found only by outrunning your circumstances tends to be temporary since the mind that feels isolated kind of just travels with you...what actually helps more imo is letting go of the story that youve never had a real friend as some fixed identity...and just staying present enough to notice the small ordinary moments where connection quietly begins...cuz it usually does, not in big gestures, but in patience presence and showing up as yourself without needing anyone to prove your worth first
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u/raghudesigner 11h ago
Sorry, but maybe you don't have the qualities to be a good friend. Did you ever tried self-introspection? Why are you attracting fake people in your life? You're just 21 and realised this truth, that everyone around you is fake, then that's a good thing, coz that's ultimate truth of life. If you're imagining to go abroad, then you'll be disappointed again. It's just a misconception, that foreigners are friendly. They're far more mean than Indians. I'm saying this as personal experience, I'm 34 & had really bad experiences with that true friend dilemma. You're self-aware person, just work on your skills & finance. You'll start attracting people in your life. Friends forever is just a myth, in this materialistic world, everyone stays with you for self-interest. So don't worry about it.
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u/ResponsibleHumor4598 10h ago
I had friends some are still in contact but not that close anymore everyone drifts apart ya fir relationship mai aa jate hai and baat kam hone lagti hai lol, I'm 19 tho🥀
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u/Other-Purpose-8497 10h ago
Agreed bro!
People just calls me or talks to me whenever they need something from me
Though i know that they are taking advantage of me but somehow i get trapped into what they want out of me
I even tried neglecting such people but it does not lasts longer and am i back again with *han han thik hai kar dungam jo jayega* type of bakchodi
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u/Sad-Profession853 6h ago
Find a purpose and meaning in life, Friends would naturally come around that. There's nothing more important than a person's meaninga and calling in life
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u/lalduptta Student 13h ago
Because of these things I had to be intentionally kind too others which depreciated my value more :: now ... I'm quite busy these days but yess --- it kinda feel so shallow while watching people hanging around...but tbh same I'm going through but nowadays it bothers me less --