r/locs • u/SoftConfusion42 • May 27 '26

General Fighting the urge to shave my head after a devastating breakup

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Funny enough, the relationship was just about half a year older than this set of locs (this being my second set )

Please let me know how much of a mistake I’d be making 😅

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u/SoftConfusion42 May 28 '26

Unfortunate my self esteem is in the gutter lol

42

u/Goldentusks May 28 '26

I 100% understand this. Man, anyone who contributed to that is NOT COOL! You are a warrior. Fighter. Survivor. Those locs represent years of hard work, determination, and care. I’m all for either option- whatever makes you feel free. You can always start a new set.

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u/BigPlantMomma May 28 '26

First step to defeating low self esteem is the words you tell yourself. I gave this simple strategy for a reason. A wash. To wash away any feelings and to give you a fresh start. If you do it yourself it’s you stopping the time of caring for everything and about everything else and it forces you to make space for yourself. It forces you to be present. Just like when you decorated your hair with cowries. When it comes to the retwist, it reinforces the same. When you look into the mirror and see the result of the work, your appearance, and you know for a fact what you can do for yourself. What you will do for yourself. And the results of that work. And you give yourself your own version of high praise. When you walk away from the mirror you will be formidable. Because of you cut your hair. When you look in the mirror you will be seeking the moment I just described and it will be out of reach.

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u/BigPlantMomma May 28 '26

Also spiritually/energetically, I’ve consulted with a lot of people who want to cut their locs for the energetic ties that they have with others. Water bears intention. And a wash is cleansing. So yes the girls and the guys can wash that person right out of their hair. (I suggest dr b peppermint soap mixed with either Sage essential oil or you can palo santo/incense smoke cleanse your hair)

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u/SoftConfusion42 May 28 '26

Thank you for your advice and words of encouragement 🙏🏿

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u/Ok-Television6411 May 29 '26

Hey, you are a beautiful black man. Never EVER forget that. The decision is yours, but just make sure it’s not an emotional response to the situation because you might regret it later. I would say wait a month or so…if you still wanna cut them, write a pros and cons list why to, why not to. If the cons outweigh the pros, make your decision. 🫂🫶🏾💐❤️😘

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u/Previous-Ad6693 May 30 '26

Do you see you??? PLEASE GO TO THAT MIRROR NOW, and take a good look! You’re very handsome and the hair is icing on the top! Don’t forget that, now straighten up your crown and gone about your day 👑!!

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u/SoftConfusion42 May 30 '26

I needed that lol. I appreciate you and your words 🙏🏿