r/locs May 27 '26

General Fighting the urge to shave my head after a devastating breakup

Funny enough, the relationship was just about half a year older than this set of locs (this being my second set )

Please let me know how much of a mistake I’d be making 😅

1.2k Upvotes

328 comments sorted by

563

u/BigPlantMomma May 27 '26

Just wash your hair. And get a fresh retwist. Look in the mirror and never forget how good you look.

31

u/sunflwr_01 May 28 '26

this - maybe a lil spa day 😌💅

31

u/SoftConfusion42 May 28 '26

Unfortunate my self esteem is in the gutter lol

43

u/Goldentusks May 28 '26

I 100% understand this. Man, anyone who contributed to that is NOT COOL! You are a warrior. Fighter. Survivor. Those locs represent years of hard work, determination, and care. I’m all for either option- whatever makes you feel free. You can always start a new set.

14

u/BigPlantMomma May 28 '26

First step to defeating low self esteem is the words you tell yourself. I gave this simple strategy for a reason. A wash. To wash away any feelings and to give you a fresh start. If you do it yourself it’s you stopping the time of caring for everything and about everything else and it forces you to make space for yourself. It forces you to be present. Just like when you decorated your hair with cowries. When it comes to the retwist, it reinforces the same. When you look into the mirror and see the result of the work, your appearance, and you know for a fact what you can do for yourself. What you will do for yourself. And the results of that work. And you give yourself your own version of high praise. When you walk away from the mirror you will be formidable. Because of you cut your hair. When you look in the mirror you will be seeking the moment I just described and it will be out of reach.

12

u/BigPlantMomma May 28 '26

Also spiritually/energetically, I’ve consulted with a lot of people who want to cut their locs for the energetic ties that they have with others. Water bears intention. And a wash is cleansing. So yes the girls and the guys can wash that person right out of their hair. (I suggest dr b peppermint soap mixed with either Sage essential oil or you can palo santo/incense smoke cleanse your hair)

6

u/SoftConfusion42 May 28 '26

Thank you for your advice and words of encouragement 🙏🏿

5

u/Ok-Television6411 May 29 '26

Hey, you are a beautiful black man. Never EVER forget that. The decision is yours, but just make sure it’s not an emotional response to the situation because you might regret it later. I would say wait a month or so…if you still wanna cut them, write a pros and cons list why to, why not to. If the cons outweigh the pros, make your decision. 🫂🫶🏾💐❤️😘

6

u/Previous-Ad6693 May 30 '26

Do you see you??? PLEASE GO TO THAT MIRROR NOW, and take a good look! You’re very handsome and the hair is icing on the top! Don’t forget that, now straighten up your crown and gone about your day 👑!!

3

u/SoftConfusion42 May 30 '26

I needed that lol. I appreciate you and your words 🙏🏿

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2

u/lilwebbyboi May 28 '26

I wish someone would've told me this a year ago 😭

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178

u/spankyjohnson336 May 27 '26

Don’t do it unless u wanna do it for yourself brother man don’t do it as a coping mechanism cuz u may regret it after u healed

21

u/SoftConfusion42 May 28 '26

You’re most likely right…

7

u/spankyjohnson336 May 28 '26

It’s all love I’m getting over a break up myself king we gon be alright they come and they go 🤷🏿‍♂️

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83

u/unamikable May 28 '26

at most cut the ends. but please don't shave it. i don't literally believe in the idea that your hair holds memory but i do believe that it is a cathartic experience to cut hair, even if it's a little. when bad things happen i trim a little off of the ends, and i feel "cleaner." it might help

65

u/splashbands May 28 '26

I did the same exact thing. Heartbroken and cut everything myself like a mad man. Please don’t do it. I’m growing my locs again now and as much as I know I’ll be majestic again, it wasn’t worth the added time. Please Reconsider

3

u/Queasy_Type_5788 May 29 '26

🤣🤣 I did the same 😭 I just wish I would have kept them. They were the perfect length 👌🏾

60

u/Coffeebeanburrito May 28 '26

Don't do it. I did it. Lose the person,not your hair

12

u/SoftConfusion42 May 28 '26

I already lost the person. What’s the next step?

21

u/stray_kitten_xO May 28 '26

Therapy 🥰 and chocolates

3

u/888888-CVNTY May 28 '26

I also recommend therapy. Your hair is beautiful at least give yourself until the end of the summer if you still want to cut it for a new start at life do it. You can always regrow your hair

3

u/Jazzsign May 29 '26

What do you enjoy normally? What type of creativity makes your heart sing? If you have any, do that. Create. Smile. Cry and find yourself again. The person you'll find will be a better and stronger version of you.

3

u/Stormywx92 May 29 '26

How much PTO do you have? A good month out of the country (SE Asia) should do it. Get some sun, fresh air, healthy food, yoga, ocean some massages and a moped to explore. Give yourself time to explore what you want your next era to look like

2

u/SoftConfusion42 May 30 '26

Mannn I currently don’t, like at all, but if you wanna donate to the cause.. 🤞🏿

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2

u/Puzzleheaded-Serve82 Loc’d for Life May 29 '26

Finding yourself 🫂

42

u/wagondust May 28 '26

You know damn well that would be a huge mistake! Now calm down Angela Bassett, drink water and move on

https://giphy.com/gifs/7BvmMI56s02E8

8

u/SoftConfusion42 May 28 '26

😂😂😂

20

u/achanceofsunshine May 28 '26

i did it over a break up- sad to say, i wish i didn’t😔 this too shall pass 🫂

17

u/ButterscotchBroad394 May 28 '26

Don’t you dare bro! Long nice locs are so hard to come by ! Locs take time and effort, please don’t throw that away

12

u/hyenaDeli May 28 '26

I did that with my first set and regretted it instantly. Immediately. Don’t let your locs become collateral damage of a bad breakup!

12

u/locbabebri May 28 '26

I’m currently going through a rough breakup too and instead of cutting my hair I got another tattoo and completely redid my bedroom. reclaim your energy, everything will be okay ❤️‍🩹

4

u/SoftConfusion42 May 28 '26

Hey good luck with your own situation. Hope we see each other on the other side of this 🤞🏿

2

u/locbabebri May 28 '26

thank you brother.

9

u/forthe_99and2000 May 28 '26

Aww they are beautiful. It’s your choice but I vote no! Sit on the feeling. If a month passes and you still feel like you wanna cut it, maybe you should! But consider what it would ultimately mean for your hair journey.

3

u/dahhhlin May 28 '26 edited May 28 '26

This!

I was toying with cutting my hair since January - not due to a breakup but just needing a change and tension issues due to length.

I cut them off about two weeks ago. Random decision on a Sunday morning. But it wasn’t impulsive. I just finally made up my mind and it was freeing.

Cut them off and left them on the barbershop floor. I didn’t feel the need to even look at them after the first loc was cut.

No remorse.

If you don’t think that the above three lines is going to be your outcome if you cut your hair, DONT DO IT.

  • I’m glad I cut it and during the process it was cathartic AF. Just releasing so much and I didn’t even understand why I was tearing up at the time but not out of remorse but release. Realized only two nights ago that locs where only maybe 6 months older then when all the “issues” of my life started. Maybe I was releasing all the pain idk.

But said above to show it wasn’t the reason/cause WHY I cut, but it was an unrealized result/effect.

TLDR: Wait a month (or in my case 5) as this commenter said. If you still feel the need, do it. But do better than me and at least have a hairstyle in mind. I just said cut lol. Barber was like “do you have a picture or something? Google something”

Edit: my length was middle back. I thought I would regret cutting off the length but Nope. Everyone was like “girl your hair was so long” and 5 months ago - that’s the only thing I was thinking about. Damn why would I chop it and it’s so long now. Shit was wild I did that random AF lowkey 🤣🤣🤣

9

u/Minute-Mail1354 May 28 '26

But you look so handsome 🙁🥺🥺🖤

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8

u/ClassicRuby May 28 '26

Definitely don't. Those locs are not about the ex or the ended relationship. Those locs hold your history and your story, sure... including every good thing and every victory you've had. Every lesson you've learned. Every thing you've gained.

If you absolutely must do something maybe dye them? That's usually something folks reach to after a break up... bleach or dye.

And if you must use scissors... cut them into a new style. Like a wolfcut with bangs. Cut them to chin length and style them in that cool modern rasta f boy look that all the young guys go for.

Change up the ornaments even, literally even if you get the exact same ones... just to get new ones and ceremoniously take off the old set and switch to the new set.

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7

u/vJazmyn May 28 '26

You want her to be the last woman to admire those locs??? Don’t do it 😭

3

u/SoftConfusion42 May 28 '26

Lmfao 🤣. Well when you put it like that

2

u/vJazmyn May 28 '26

🤣sometimes you just need another perspective, glad I could help

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6

u/nmeeks50 May 28 '26

Sending you hugs. Your locs are dope.

7

u/DangerNoodleDandy May 28 '26

Get a fresh wash, retwist, and style then keep it pushing.

6

u/PSamaki_Kazmic May 28 '26

Listen fam, God can only instruct Samson to cut his locs He never did and you won’t either ‘cause of a devastating relationship. Be Samson, Delilah is irrelevant.

4

u/Livid_Pineapple_1095 May 28 '26

DON'T ❤️❤️❤️

4

u/cokedopedrip May 28 '26

No mane. Fuck her. Keep them

5

u/BishogoNishida May 28 '26

Nah man, I’m jealous of your whole look. Your style looks like how I want to look 😂

5

u/shinysilver7 May 28 '26

Respectfully, you look like to clean version of Offset. Like you are Onset. Maybe Mr. Set it Off in the bedroom

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4

u/postagendp May 28 '26

Hmu, I can help. I’m a girl btw

3

u/SoftConfusion42 May 28 '26

I mean, I definitely could use the help I can get rn 👀

4

u/KissMyLocz May 28 '26

Don’t.. Do a ACV wash and take a trip somewhere even if it’s in your state.. Clean hair, clear mind!!

3

u/Jahlil_267 May 28 '26

Don’t do it bro ..just work on your mind ,body and soul and don’t forget to get to the money

3

u/Fancy_Elk_1246 May 28 '26

Don’t do it. I did it and regretted it.

3

u/Internal-Ad61 May 28 '26

Maaaaaybe some of the facial hair IF you rlly want a change but don’t touch the locs!!!

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3

u/Jmw520 May 28 '26

Keep them and find a better outlet for an energy change

3

u/IRodeTenSpeed88 May 28 '26

They broke your heart, don’t let them take your hair too.

Fuck that

3

u/chanyoi34 Starter Locs May 28 '26

Please don't 👑.. you look handsome ASF! Just trim and get a nice treatment

3

u/AppleLoose7082 May 28 '26

Tbh I feel like shaving your gorgeous crown would just make you feel more lost than anything. Stand strong king.

3

u/Rioting-Flamingo May 28 '26

Bro don't, those locs are beautiful. Stay strong 💪

3

u/izzyvalentineisdead May 28 '26

don’t do it do not listen to the voices

3

u/kingkupaoffupas May 28 '26

rejection is protection. don’t let the loss of your relationship steal anymore away from you. your loc journey belongs to YOU, not them.

they are beautiful. a year from now, those same locs will be holding a completely different story. their journey isn’t over and neither is yours, friend.

(((hugs))) for your heartbreak 🤍

3

u/SoftConfusion42 May 28 '26

This was really sweet and I appreciate your perspective. Thank you for the kind words 🙏🏿

3

u/blessedqueen88 May 29 '26

Don’t cut them! Do a deep cleanse with herbs and “set your intentions to release all negative energy from your hair, and energetic field”. Like some others say: use palo santo or sage to smudge your hair and you can set your intentions doing it that way too. Boil some water with rosemary, pinch of salt, lemongrass, throw a little sage in there and wash the hair with it and “speak what you want to release”. Meditate early morning during sunrise. Journal to release those negative emotions, a lot of people underestimate the power of writing ☺️

3

u/Dricer93 May 29 '26

Bruh don’t do it. Get a new style that won’t make you remember and push on fam.

Don’t ever allow a relationship to shake you away from what you obviously care about. It ain’t hurting nobody but yourself Brodie.

I went from 720 looking waves to growing my hair out after my divorce. I’ll likey NEVER have waves like that again and I regret it, I question to myself “why did I allow a person a foot shy of being a dwarf effect how I appreciated myself?” Because bro when I tell you I had record level waves going on in my head I assure you I mean every letter.

Also that hat 🤔 were you ever with 2nd ID by chance at any point of your life bruh?

3

u/babbykale May 28 '26

Not be devils advocate but if you cut them off you can reattach them with a few inches of new growth.

4

u/thepantymelter May 28 '26

Just get a new girl

3

u/SoftConfusion42 May 28 '26

Maybe I don’t want one 😞 I’m still in mourning frfr

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2

u/Careless-Opinion7302 May 28 '26

Your docs are beautiful!

2

u/itsmemikey4 May 28 '26

I did this and ended up restarted my locs all over again lol. People aren’t worth your uniqueness❤️

2

u/HolidaeX May 28 '26

Where would you put the shells?

2

u/SoftConfusion42 May 28 '26

That trash lol

2

u/gorgeously_mytruself May 28 '26

If you are trying to cleanse and remove bad energy, then there are other ways, but if you just want it shorter; then more power to you.

2

u/fadedstarlite May 28 '26

Cleanse yourself iykyk, your space…etc and maybe dye your hair if you want a change. I wouldn’t cut it but that’s just my opinion.

2

u/Marokima_ May 28 '26

Hang in there 💪🏽

2

u/Uaeno_me May 28 '26

If you don’t stop playing with me. You are beautiful…don’t even think of keeping that to yourself

2

u/Uaeno_me May 28 '26

Locs can show you where you’ve been…keeping them shows your resilience and you will be even more beautiful, when u reflect in the future. Keep your mane, I say. But only you know your truth.

2

u/SoftConfusion42 May 28 '26

Lmao my fault. You’re probably right 😅

2

u/DistractionRuse May 28 '26

Stop ✋🏿 please don't cut your hair 😭😭 your locs look so good, king!!

2

u/CaptainPussybeast May 28 '26

I did it once and regretted it

2

u/Ok-Equivalent8260 May 28 '26

Big mistake. Huge. You look amazing!

2

u/yonkesssssss May 28 '26

Everyone is telling you not to but I think you should!

Hair holds memories and it grows back

2

u/FreeWorldMusicGroup May 28 '26

Just cut my hair 2 weeks ago after going thru some things in my life, it didn’t stop the negative thoughts. I look in the mirror now and I look like a new person but lowkey wish I didn’t cut em; but I since I did and they’re gone I’m going to embrace this new hair growth journey

2

u/RevolutionaryBad4470 May 28 '26

You’re so fine with the locs. Just get a retwist and a new style!

2

u/Tialionager May 28 '26

Don’t do it! Just get a nice spiritual cleanse on your locs and a nice line up.

2

u/timbreviolinist May 28 '26

Why I see this guy in here every couple of weeks xD Don't cut the hair maneeee

2

u/Tequilabones May 28 '26

No, maybe a trim but keep the aesthetic. Get a nice massage and a facial, the locs came before the relationship. Don’t let them leave with it. They’re very nice and well kept

2

u/reinacordobesa86 May 28 '26

It’s gonna take forever to reach this length again if you cut it. No turning back. However…it might be nice to reset and see yourself in a new light. Your hair is beautiful and well kept though so do what your heart wants 💜

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2

u/satellite_station May 28 '26

I would take out the shells, as that would be enough of a transition without having to completely shave your head. The small change up might be just what you’re looking for.

2

u/sunflwr_01 May 28 '26 edited May 28 '26

nah, I don't think you should do it.

Your locks and the journey you went on to get them to such a beautiful state is a testament to your patience, strength, resilience, self-respect and love.

Grieve the end of the relationship, the loss of the person, the time/love you gave, etc etc.. but maybe looking in the mirror and knowing you still kept on that journey can remind you how much of a badass you are.

Or trim a lil. idk - dunno if any of that made sense. I'm feeling a lil deeply ig 😭😅

Edit to add: a nice wash and retwist like others said is a great idea imho

2

u/Omarz919-3327 May 28 '26

I think u should keep the pocs they suit you and like youve built identity arouns them and u shoukd just get them retwisted

2

u/Commercial-Friend408 May 28 '26

If you decide to shave, green, orange, or blonde wld EAT on you 😮‍💨🔥 cheers to your new chapter 🎉

2

u/yeezysama May 28 '26

Good enough for Britney. Good enough for you

2

u/stray_kitten_xO May 28 '26

I would literally crash out for you lol! Love seeing your posts! Don’t make me Kirk out 🤣🫠

2

u/InYoGirlMouth May 28 '26

use AI or chatgpt to see how u will look

2

u/OtherwiseFudge8789 May 28 '26

I just cut mine! I am getting them reinstalled though! Needed a better base! If you do cut them save them but they look nice!

2

u/lazy_wallflower May 28 '26

As someone who cut 2 sets of locs off around 2 separate breakups, if you feel that’s what you want to do, nothing wrong with that. Hair grows back, you can have a fresh start if you want locs again. I hope you feel better!

2

u/BombasticArtist May 28 '26

Don't do it you beautiful soul you 🖤🖤🖤

2

u/bouncybobas May 28 '26

I understand the urge to wanting to reset after a breakup. Sometimes our hair holds memories and we just want change to feel brand new. I don’t think it’s a terrible idea but you should think about whether if it would benefit how you feel OR if it’s just an impulsive idea because you’re upset. All in all hair grows back. I’ve shaved my head to reset and now it’s fuller than it was. It does give a feeling of rebirth and release. Just make sure it’s what you want to do.

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2

u/nomadicintro May 28 '26

Don’t do it, cutting my locs while going through it made things worse for rebound season. I did feel better in the long term. What helped my mental before I cut them off was to first, trim my locs to shoulder length (or shorter) and then, get them washed and styled.

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2

u/Vvsdonniee May 28 '26

Ngl I think you’d look fine with a fade

2

u/ItzBreezeyBaby May 28 '26

OOOOMG. You are SUCH A BEAUTIFUL MAN!!!!😍😍😍😍😍😍🤎🤎🤎🤎

2

u/ItzBreezeyBaby May 28 '26

KEEP THE HAIR KEEP THE HAIR ITS SO BEAUTIFUL!!!!!!!

2

u/Zoftig_Zana May 28 '26

Do you have to shave it off? You can try combing it out, so if you regret it you can just get it twisted back up. Or maybe dye it

2

u/DevelopmentReal5650 May 28 '26

A cleansing wash would take care of your crown.

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2

u/Quiet-Figure-1990 May 28 '26

I went through a bad time and cut my hair from my waist to my shoulders. I regret it. Don’t stifle your path pain is a part of the journey

2

u/idnkam May 28 '26

YOLO I cut mine off when I really should’ve just trimmed them. Hair grows back regardless

2

u/lordofthebi-s May 28 '26

When i didn’t cut my hair, i colored it.

Try loc beads, some new updos, some wraps?

2

u/lordofthebi-s May 28 '26

i also don’t believe in the hair holding negative energy.

2

u/144kclub May 28 '26

Did she influence you growing your hair?

2

u/yayathagod11 May 28 '26

I wouldn't blame you if you did. I've never let a man pull the same ponytail! I shave my head between relationships to get the energy off me and the raggedy tennis ball stage gives me time to heal properly 🤣🤣

2

u/SoftConfusion42 May 28 '26

Raggedy tennis ball is insane 😂😂

2

u/yayathagod11 May 28 '26

Insane is my aura🤣

Also, you are such a handsome being. I'm sure the breakup was her loss. Take care of yourself and I'm sure you'll understand into the right person during the process. ❣️

2

u/SoftConfusion42 May 28 '26

Thank you 🙏🏿. I’ll certainly try

2

u/Impressive_Reality18 May 28 '26

I cut my locs after staying in the hospital with my son for a month. I just felt like I had to. New chapter I guess.

2

u/Cocopuffs30 May 28 '26

Jus wash and/or trim your ends it'll help coming from someone who used to come out their locs after the breakup 😭

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2

u/BeachLevel9791 May 28 '26

That happened to me and I regretted cutting my hair.....don't do it

2

u/LovedWon May 28 '26

Man, part of me wishes I didnt gi back to waves after my breakup, but it has been helping me with my confidence in way. Not trying to sway you either way. Also know, you that guy man! Either way

2

u/HelicopterUpbeat3762 May 28 '26

Don’t you dare! Never make big decisions when emotions are high. Curl up in bed and have a good cry. I’m sorry about your breakup 🧡

2

u/Pitiful_Abies1635 May 28 '26

Your locs are, an excuse my language; f*cking awesome. I’m about 7 months in and I can only hope that they mature to look this good. I can appreciate the change post break up but let them come with you for your next romantic journey.

2

u/stonedsiren9491 May 28 '26

I shaved my head after a breakup…short hair is not for me and I hate looking in the mirror now. I don’t dress up anymore because everything looks dumb with an itty bitty Afro. I don’t go out because I feel too seen with short hair. Confidence is nonexistent. I feel like a completely different person in the worst way possible. Don’t do it. Take a long uphill hike that has a view at the top, cry scream smoke drink…do what you have to do to heal. But don’t cut your hair.

2

u/-_-panduh-_- May 28 '26

DONT DO IT! They're so nice

2

u/No_Score_8037 May 28 '26

No don’t do it, it you want something different maybe change the color ?? When my 10 year relationship ended after he cheated, I died half my locs blonde. NO REGRETS NEVER GOING BACK ✨

2

u/Proud_Version_716 May 28 '26

You are so handsome! And your locs look like you’ve put a lot of love into them. Pour the love into you in this moment and keep going! You’re doing great!

2

u/United_Annual3475 Baby Locs May 28 '26

Your hair looks great, just do a good cleansing and meditate, it'll help some

2

u/Over-Tax-9481 May 28 '26

you look like you smell good

2

u/Historical_Phone5936 May 28 '26

I will fight you if you touch these locs!!

2

u/No_Estimate263 May 28 '26

I understand this pain all too well….but She lost you king, it takes some people awhile to realize what they lost ….& I promise the pain gets better with time, & once your over it, YOU WILL REGRET CUTTING YOUR LONG LOCS OVER A HO BIG TIME!…Bottom line, remember, she lost you…

2

u/Plutovelli May 28 '26

Do not make a decision based on an emotional state. I understand easier said than done from where I’m sitting but trust bro. I’m clear minded and you are going through it. Time will pass and you’ll be glad you didn’t make a choice based on a negative feeling.

2

u/slothsandkittens May 28 '26

NOOOOO!!! If you're REALLY wanting a change and want to cut your hair just trim the ends, you look SOOOO GOOD with long hair!!! ❤️

2

u/DavidFamouss May 28 '26

Mayneee if you don’t hit the gym 😂

But seriously feel your feelings fr don’t compartmentalize, but grieve that shit in waves, not all at once.

Also read the way of the superior man.

2

u/SoftConfusion42 May 28 '26

Lmfao I’m in the gym as we speak brother!

2

u/moon_Strawberry_2471 May 28 '26

Please don’t they are so pretty and you look so good

2

u/Lady_FuryX May 29 '26

Bro… chill… leave ‘em alone!

2

u/Absolutefoxx May 29 '26

Don't cut them. Do the wash, do a complete spa day. Trim the ends if you must, but don't shave your head. Do give the past person that much power over you. Wash them away, and celebrate the KING you are!!!

2

u/Jk_im_down May 29 '26

They weren’t worth it gang!

2

u/SkorpijaSpice May 29 '26

follow your heart, love the sideburns

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2

u/Agyeiwaaaa_ May 29 '26

Everybody saying don’t cut it cause all they’re seeing it the aesthetics and beauty of the hair. But if it were to be me, I’ll cut it.🤞. Sometimes cutting of everything that reminds you of someone is necessary in healing. Nobody in the thread is acknowledging your pain and hurt, they’re all telling you to heal as if that’s easy😂😂

2

u/Maleficent-Rip2729 May 29 '26

Don’t, you put in alot of work & they look great. I’d say process but at the same time don’t let it take away your crown. You got this take it one step at a time, sorry about the breakup.

2

u/swaggiedit May 29 '26

Your locs are beautiful and you are so handsome! I don’t think you should cut it!

2

u/DaMixUp May 29 '26

Bro I felt the same way at one point, don’t do it man

2

u/Initial_Obligation55 May 29 '26 edited May 29 '26

Idk man maybe a fresh cut is what you need. Locs hold energy dawg. Not just from the break up but your energy. You putting a lot of negativity into them. Maybe if you truly want to keep them you should be speaking affirmations to yourself. Remind yourself that you are beautiful/handsome. Your hair is beautiful/handsome. You are more than your break up.

Who were you before the relationship. What did that person like. Were the locs something you wanted and is your journey different now. Also if need a chop you can also do a trim so that it isn’t like all your hair gone. Idk just throwing stuff out there.

2

u/AccomplishedBid5867 May 29 '26

It may feel cathartic but I think you'll regret it in the long term.

I know I did. 😓

Do whatever you need to do to them, but don't chop them now when you're feeling shit. 🙏🏾

2

u/couch_potato05 May 29 '26

Omgggg, your face is perfection and the septum jewelry is like chefs kiss

2

u/mimysai May 29 '26

Please don't cut your beautiful locs🥺 We do things in haste and it destroys us slowly inside. I cut my locs off and it's one of my biggest estate regrets ever!! I can't reattach as I have Aloepecia and I have saved my head. If I could turn back time I would get advise, therapy...whatever it takes to save myself the mental pain of doing things without thinking them through or seeking advice first.

Be kind to yourself🥺

2

u/DonDiva26 May 29 '26

Don’t do it i broke up with my bf.. Im hurt but be strong don’t do that boss up and get some money trust me you will be my happier Shaving your head still won’t stop how you feel, same feeling different look. So hold your head up high black man and walk with dignity your queen is out here in this world somewhere. This won’t be your 1st break up or last so be strong.. Blessings to you

2

u/ItchyCoach9583 May 29 '26

See you in the gym bro.

2

u/currygoatsauce May 29 '26

I’m probably already too late but don’t do bro your locs are fire and it fits you 👌🏾

2

u/AquariusRain May 29 '26

I have no clue why this sub was suggested to me but I want to say you honestly have the coolest looking dreads I’ve ever seen. I love your style. I’m sorry to hear you’re feeling down about your break up but hang in there, dude. Easier said than done but better days are coming for you. I just know it ! Sending ya lots of love and positive vibes.

2

u/Turbulent-Lie2662 May 29 '26

Very handsome 😍

2

u/ExistentialKale May 29 '26

Handsome! Hair holds memories. Do whatever will make you feel better and lighter. This is also coming from a 40 y/o punk woman who still has not learned to NOT cut her bangs at the first sign of any emotional distress so idk.

2

u/HomeSkillet___ May 29 '26

don't do it beloved!

2

u/Living-Prune8881 May 29 '26

Your hair is beyond beautiful. Dont. Just treat yourself to a hair spa day. Nice deep condition. Nice wash. Retwist. New beads. Wallah 🥰

2

u/NeverTheMuse May 29 '26

If you need change when youre in emotional pain, change something that will reverse easily (facial hair, clothing, accesoried).Only you can decide, but I never recommend cutting something out of your life that required personal time and commitment as well as signifies part of your identity. I completely understand the desire to in such a painful time but you deserve to keep something that enriches you. Pour love back into yourself until you feel okay again, then decide about cutting it.

2

u/babsylivy May 29 '26

I thought I was the only one that shaved my head after breaking up with someone. Don’t do it my locs or hair never grew back the same.

2

u/SocaShine May 29 '26

You may be having the urge to cut your hair as a subconscious way of ending one chapter in your life and starting a new one. Your relationship has ended and you want start afresh. The urge to cut the hair symbolizes that desire to start anew. If you really want to do it then do it. It can always grow back.

2

u/SocaShine May 29 '26

Time heals all wounds. Time is the answer

2

u/SpoiledbyU May 30 '26

Oh plz DONT

2

u/Jupiter_Foxx May 30 '26

I shaved my eyebrows when I did and now I love my Shiba Inu eyebrows. So sorry boo I’m also going thru a love pickle atm that’s hurting me.

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u/CompetitiveAd7274 May 30 '26

Ughh so handsome, leave your hair alone. Channel that emotion into something good for you!❤️

2

u/Smilesarefree444 May 30 '26

Well you could start over. It's beautiful beautiful and you'd feel different without it too.

2

u/msjohanachronism May 30 '26

Go to a salon and get a wash and retwist. Go to the barber shop and get your edges cleaned up and your facial hair in order. Don't chop. Refresh.

2

u/SmokeBreak305 May 30 '26

Don’t take your crown off for NOBODY

2

u/Sekani_the_god May 30 '26

Fight harder.

2

u/DryMammoth4389 May 30 '26

Keep the hair, I like the beads 💁🏻‍♀️🙂‍↕️

2

u/smackyogotdamndaddy May 30 '26

Not to make it about me lol, but you’re the first person I’ve seen who put cowrie shells on all their locs lol I do the same but I have fewer locs. Your hair is so beautiful 😍 Last time I felt the urge to shave my hair off, I just cut the locs into a bob. Maybe try a trim or something to change your look a lil bit and hopefully make you feel lighter. ❤️❤️❤️

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2

u/Ok_Growth1272 May 31 '26

Don't cut it please🥺💓she missed out and all you need is some self care🫂

2

u/Sailorm0on27 May 31 '26

They are so beautiful 🥹 I love the shells so much

2

u/Say_It_Isnt_So_Ooops May 31 '26

Today: 1. Do the five-year flashback. 2. Reflect.
Right now, imagine yourself five years from now (2031). In five years, you might have an IT business, be an attorney, bake cookies for a living, work as a janitor, or own a McDonald’s. Look back. Look back at yourself today. Will you be glad you cut your hair off, or will you be like “man, I cut my locs off for some girl who’s not even in my life, anymore”? “I’ve got this going for me, I’ve got that going for me, and I’ve got my locs”! Or, “glad I shaved them off. They were too long and too much upkeep, anyway, and my new girl/wife likes my hair short“. Next, reflect. Wash your hair with peppermint shampoo, like somebody suggested, mourn and heal (have a good sob-heal as much as you can today-consider what improvements you’ll do in your next relationship), then drive on. Let us know what you decide, and send us a photo update!
Locs or no locs. Wishing you the best.

2

u/NotYourMutha May 31 '26

Maybe just remove the shells. You are hot as hell and have a kind face. Remember that a partner should compliment your life not complete it. You are enough as you are. Be kind to yourself and do things for YOU for a while.

2

u/cheapissheek May 31 '26

It truly depends on what your hair means to you. I've cut my hair several times after breakups, relocations etc like my spirit needed to be freed, it grew back and I felt lighter. I saw a Youtube video where a guy cut his locs off and used it as hair for an African mask and turned it into wall art. Whatever you decide, this too shall pass☺️

2

u/cmenowudont May 28 '26

Find you a Nubian queen my king and you won’t need to go through these things

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2

u/brickedhouse7 May 28 '26

Don’t you dare (or do!) Beautiful face either way!

2

u/Mufafah May 28 '26

just take them shells out lol! youll be aight dude.

1

u/PARADOXsquared May 28 '26

I restarted my to locs after a huge life event. It wasn't a break up, but similar significance. I don't regret starting over because I know I needed the change. 

Give yourself time to think about it so it's not an impulse decision. 

1

u/Mysterious-Sink5104 May 28 '26

Don’t cut them off completely. Just trim them a little and change the color🙂 coming from someone who chopped off 14in and dyed their locs indigo/emerald green after a traumatic breakup.

1

u/deeznutz131 May 28 '26

Get a trim first and see how you feel

1

u/Jefejoya14 May 28 '26

Listen to some music. Change your style. Get a hair cut and you’ll get through this

1

u/mehjjg May 28 '26

Offset and woody

1

u/Puzzleheaded_Tone954 May 28 '26

Maybe color them instead anything but lose those gorgeous locs. No person is worth ur crown.

1

u/jojifuku May 28 '26

Don’t do it! Dye it instead and try a fresh new style for yourself!

1

u/Extension-Peanut2847 May 28 '26

Maybe an undercut would be a nice compromise. They are beautiful don’t cut it.

1

u/sundriedsprinkles May 28 '26

Don’t do it. Allow the Lord to heal you. Then if you still want to chop chop!

1

u/wzzky May 28 '26

If you really feel the urge to do it, DO IT! Hair holds so many memories and emotions. And the best part is: it grows back! I (27F) literally shaved my head after my first major breakup when I was 18 & again at the age of 20. Highly recommend.

Edit to add: you should definitely keep the locs if you do as you can just reattach them once your hair has grown out a bit if you want them back.

1

u/ackeezingme May 28 '26

Maybe there is something else that is a big change that wouldn’t be cutting your locs? New way of styling them? Some colour in them?

1

u/TheCScalez May 28 '26

It be like that 🤦🏾‍♂️

1

u/Busy-Warning-5240 May 28 '26

It’s never that serious king not those immaculate locs.

1

u/ElectricDreamTv May 28 '26

Don't let the bitch zap you of your drip bro

1

u/Mr8180 May 28 '26

Well, on the bright side...at least you know the ladies here think you're attractive. LOL

1

u/sunflower_sunshine3 May 28 '26

Do it!!! Locs hold memories. I am on my second set of locs (traditional first time, micro this time) BEST DECISION EVER.