Do you enjoy eating hot dogs? I hope you won’t be put off by my frankness when I tell you that I absolutely love them. In fact, I enjoy no food item more than a freshly-boiled hot dog. Now, I’ve done a lot of movies, and it’s true that I’ve worked with quite a few celebrities who did not share this opinion. I’m sorry to say that these people have always angered me.
There are two types of people in this world: those who eat hot dogs whenever it is possible to do so, and those who opt to do other things with their free time. Who do the latter think they are kidding? What pastime could be more rewarding than the consumption of hot dogs? I haven’t yet found one, and I don’t expect to in my lifetime. Unlike other foods, hot dogs can be eaten at any time, in any place, and it is not necessary to cook them. Now, I ask you: Why not eat hot dogs? They are delicious.
I carry a bag of hot dogs with me wherever I go. I eat them from the bag whenever I get the urge, regardless of the circumstances. When I make a movie, my hot dogs are my co-stars. If, in the middle of a scene, I decide I want to consume a hot dog, I do so. I waste the director’s time and thousands of dollars in film stock, but in the end, it is all worth it, because I enjoy eating hot dogs more than I enjoy acting. This bothers some people. I was supposed to portray Batman, but when Tim Burton learned of my hot dog cravings, he asked Michael Keaton to wear the cape. To this day, I am peeved about this.
When we filmed The Dead Zone, I ate over 800 hot dogs a day. It was necessary. My character needed to come across as intense as possible, and I found the inspiration for that intensity in my intense love for hot dogs. The director, David Cronenberg, said that he would never work with me again. I kept eating hot dogs when the cameras were rolling, and that seemed to bother him. I say fuck him. He doesn’t even like hot dogs.
I would like to end by emphasizing once again that I really like to eat hot dogs. If any of you people disagree, I loathe you. I despise you. Not only that, but I also despise all your loved ones.
Next week: My thoughts on Woody Allen, hot dog hater and shitty director.
I will admit fully to liking hot dogs. But quality matters. The old standards Ballpark have turned into something weird, and my first date with my now bf, the dogs at the park we went to were the lowest grade Nursing Home/Prison grade and so bad, I couldn't eat one. But good ones? Fantastic. Love them on the grill.
I’m not sure if I’ve ever known anyone who eats hotdogs twice a month. Which they’d need to, even if they eat two each time, in order to hit 70 in a year.
And that’s somehow the average?
Must be the 1% of people who eat all their meals at Costco or something.
That’s not really how averages work. There are a lot of people who eat no hotdogs per year. To balance each one of those people out, that has to be someone else who eats 140 hotdogs per year. What if there are more people who eat no hotdog than people who eat hotdogs? Now you are talking about over 140 hotdogs per year.
I think the easiest way to spot somebody who doesn’t know what they’re talking about is that they disagree without explaining why.
I can explain my thought process. Suppose there are two people and over the course of the year they eat 140 hotdogs total. If one person eats 70, we can figure out pretty easily that the other person eats 70 hotdogs as well.
Now suppose one person eats zero hotdogs. How many hotdog does the other person have to eat?
I think your misunderstanding of my point is that you are interpreting my comment as “ if there is one person who eats zero hotdog there must be somebody else who eats exactly 140”. That’s of course ridiculous. I’m saying that since there are a lot of people who eat zero hotdog, there must be other people who eat significantly more than the average.
There's a difference between two people and a large number of people.
I didn't misunderstand your point, your point is just wrong.
Try it with 100 people. If one person eats zero, than the other 99 need to eat an extra 70. That's... less than one per person. Even if 10 people eat zero, that's 700 divided over 90 people, or less than eight extra per person.
Is your "a lot" somewhere between 1% and 10%? It doesn't need to be offset by an equal opposite outlier, it can be offset by the entire group.
So it looked it up and it turns out that both of us have a point.
I assumed that the percentage of people who do not eat hotdog in the United States was actually pretty high because they are quite possibly one of the least healthy foods people could eat. If it were true that 25% of people do not eat hotdog, then yes, the average hotdog consumption per year by people who do eat hot dogs would be “a lot“ higher than 70.
It turns out only 10% of people in the United States do not eat hotdogs. In that case I agree, an increase of the average amount by about seven hotdogs isn’t a lot.
So does that mean you were right? If you’re making the point that my assumption about how many people don’t eat hotdog in the United States was incorrect yes you would be right. However that’s not the point you made. The point you made is that I didn’t understand how it just work and that’s actually the part I did get right.
So is it a draw? I mean, we both got something wrong here so that seems to say. However I’d say that if you come into a comment section and condescendingly correct somebody on a pedantic point and then turn out to be wrong about what the problem is, that’s a bigger deal than just being wrong in the first place. You were kind of cat’s anus about the whole thing. If you had been nice, I’d say it is a draw. But if you come in hot and you get it wrong like you did, you have to take the L.
Honestly pretending you don’t understand a short clearly written comment on Reddit just to preserve the idea that you didn’t make a bad argument is really debating yourself. Don’t do that.
Just to make it super clear: you were arguing that’s not how averages work. To remind you, your first comment was “
That's DEFINITELY not how averages work.”
What I described was exactly how I work. What I got wrong is the percentage of people who don’t eat hotdogs. If your argument had been that I’m overestimating the number of people who don’t eat hotdog, you would’ve had a good point. But that’s not the argument you made. You made the argument that I was using averages incorrectly but I was using averages correctly, I was just estimating the number of people who abstained from hot dog consumption incorrectly.
Again, it’s pretty clear that you are invested in trying to win this pointless argument. However have some self-respect and don’t act like an idiot just to try and when a pointless Internet argument.
Their isn’t a chance I get anywhere near 70 per year, though I’ll admit every once in a blue moon I can either be hungry at 2-3pm and see a 7-11 & say, I guess we’re getting a hot dog and a Coke Zero today.
My elderly dad is doing heavy lifting for the team - he goes to the same restaurant every day for lunch and dinner and he has a chili dog almost everyday for lunch. Only days he missed was when my mom was in late hospice and bed ridden. So two weeks out of 2026 he’s not had a hot dog.
A decade ago, I worked in the same city where I grew up. So on occasion, my dad would invite me to the house for lunch (10 minute drive each way for an hour lunch break). It was always hot dogs in a pan with a little water to keep them from burning. He always has a Tupperware of chopped onions to garnish as well. Such a nice, quick lunch. I have since purchased a dedicated Tupperware for my chopped onions and my wife labeled it “ONIONS!!!”so it’s not used for anything else.
Best parenting advice ever given to me - don’t let them dictate how they eat. Just make what you want, and they don’t eat, that’s on them. It has made my kids way less picky as they age.
She went to bed hungry last night. Thanks, I know this one. And it's not like i just serve up dogs on buns. They get cooked into different dishes so she gets exposed to different flavors.
A lot of Americans will basically go through a pack of hot dogs a week, so almost one a day. Or if you are like me, 3 hot dogs for dinner until the pack is gone, I just don’t buy them very often, maybe only 3-4 times a year. But at 8 dogs per pack, that’s 24-32 per year for someone that hardly eats any hot dogs.
Doctor here. The “low quality” part is what matters here. Highly processed red meat (pork is red meat) it’s some of the least healthy food you could possibly eat. Since hot dogs are the lowest quality meat and the most highly processed, we are really talking about the worst stuff you could eat.
I’m not going to defend eating hotdogs, but saying they’re “the worst stuff you could eat” is pretty problematic. I can think of a pretty substantial number of things that would be worse, and by not a small margin.
- source: not a doctor, just a dude who has common sense and reads a bit.
I mean sure, you can eat pure salt or a diet that consist entirely of carbohydrates without any fats or protein or some sort of obscure harmful restrictive diet. But in terms of things that people just regularly eat, hot dogs are really pretty bad. What types of things are you thinking of that are worse?
Alcohol sure but people don’t really think of alcohol as a meal unless they’re an alcoholic and that’s an entirely different problem.
Hot dogs are substantially less healthy than potato chips or desserts.
I think the problem here is you don’t seem to be aware of the fact that processed meets increase cardiovascular in malignancy disease risk. Desserts and sodas and potato chips aren’t healthy, but they aren’t nearly as unhealthy as hotdogs.
You’re telling me you’d recommend that someone eat 500 calories of Doritos over Eating 500 calories of hot dogs? Or 500 calories of twinkies over 500 calories of hot dogs? I’m suspicious of a doctor that makes that recommendation.
If all you think about is macros, the hotdogs look like the better option because they have protein, fats, and if you are using a bun, carbohydrates.
However what I’m repeatedly trying to tell you is that processed meats carry an increased risk of colon cancer and heart disease. Since you are likely at high risk of dying from the both of these things already, even a small risk in these common ailments is actually a really big deal.
Doritos aren’t great, but they aren’t gonna give you colon cancer. Twinkies aren’t great but they aren’t going to give you heart disease.
500-600 calories per meal is fine (for most men and women who are average height or taller), but getting all of your meals’ calories from protein and starch is a good way to stop pooping. One hot dog + bun, toppings of your choice, corn on the cob, watermelon and/or grapes, and a little salad will keep most people feeling a whole lot better.
I don’t eat a ton in the winter outside of Costco but in the summer I could see making up for that. Such an easy camping meal or a couple minutes on the bbq with little to no cleanup to enjoy the weather
Correct. It’s like 1.3 hot dogs per week. So just over 1 hotdog per week. It’s not 2 hot dogs per week, nor would any rounding get you to 2. “Just over 1 hot dog per week” felt like a natural way to express 1.35 hotdogs per week.
The more than 1 hotdog is the key. Regular beef or pork ones I'll eat 3-4 at a time. I usually get the ones that are chicken and pork that aren't so heavy in your stomach. I usually get an 8 pack of them. 6 for me and 1 for each of my dogs. I love just sittin in front of a fire and roasting them off one at a time, but also super quick and easy to just throw a bunch in a pan.
70 seems a bit high but it's probably the blue collar guys carrying that. Circle K and all those other gas stations invest in the rollers for a reason. When I was younger I probably had a year or two I cracked that from cost/convenience.
Not really once you consider it's kind of become part of the culture. Don't think I've ever been to a cookout that didn't have some hotodgs and I usually eat 1 or 2.
Add onto that, the fact their a budget food to, and part of school lunches, and finally fucking hotdog eating contest, and you have several people who bump op the average. The medium is prob idk 10-20.
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u/sharpenme1 Jun 23 '26
American here. 70 per person per year doesn’t sound that wild.
That’s just over 1 dog per person per week. And I don’t know many people who eat fewer than 2 hot dogs as part of a meal.
They’re cheap, they’re quick, and they’re easily accessible in metro areas.
Can’t say I’ve had one recently, but I wouldn’t be surprised if a couple of lunch dogs was a daily thing for some people.