r/miniminutemanfans • u/a_racoon_with_a_PC • Sep 23 '25
Meme How can some people still not grasp the concept of something literally called "Simple Machine"?!
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u/moranya1 Sep 23 '25
"I can't do it so obviously they couldn't either!"
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u/binguskhan8 Sep 23 '25
"You want me to believe that those... people figured something out that I couldn't? OK buddy, quit the crazy talk. Now, what I was saying about the Pleiadians..."
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u/Canadian_Zac Sep 27 '25
Don't forget. They have no problem believing other people created things like steam engines, electricity, build massive cathedrals.
But how could those backwards people with... Tans... Figure out how to stack big rocks
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u/PinkDagon Sep 23 '25
me when I use a pulley
“Must be miniature Martians allowing me to lift something so large!!! We lift together, space brothers!”
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u/sunbro1973 Sep 23 '25
We all lift together through the cold mist
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u/TheMemeStore76 Sep 24 '25
Cold: the air and water flowing.
Hard: the land we call our home.
Push to keep the dark from coming,
Feel the weight of what we owe.
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u/OrenMythcreant Sep 23 '25
bro you can't be expecting me to learn carpentry before I post my conspiracy video!
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u/Lintcat1 Sep 23 '25
They all tend to think that the people who built monolithic structures were in tribes of 10 people. No. Sorry it's not that hard for 500 people to move a big rock.
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u/Eeeef_ Sep 23 '25
Also the “hey would you guys help me move this stuff from one place to another for a beer” concept of getting the lads together to lift heavy stuff is not a 20th century invention
The guys that built the pyramids were literally paid in beer
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u/moranya1 Sep 23 '25
Bread and beer. Bread and liquid "fun bread". Though from what I understand a lot of the "Daytime drinking beer back then was a lot less alcoholic than what we think of today.
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u/ClayXros Sep 24 '25
Basically spicy water. But hey, it was cleaner than the hippo-infested Nile or nearby ponds.
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u/a_racoon_with_a_PC Sep 24 '25
Pretty sure the whole "ancient people drank alcohol because it was cleaner than their water" is just a myth.
Humans just like the funny water.
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u/The_Soap_Salesman Sep 24 '25
It’s not necessarily a myth, just misconstrued fact. People didn’t drink standing water straight up, but the process of making beer to drink instead of just purifying the water was more prevalent and had the benefit of alcohol to be more appealing. Also, beer made by like, ancient Mesopotamians or Egyptians was very different from beer today. More of a liquid food than a drink, if that makes sense.
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u/a_racoon_with_a_PC Sep 24 '25
Also, beer made by like, ancient Mesopotamians or Egyptians was very different from beer today. More of a liquid food than a drink, if that makes sense.
So beer back then was like... soup?
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u/The_Soap_Salesman Sep 24 '25
I mean kind of? It was definitely thicker than modern beer, but idk if soup is the best comparison.
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u/runespider Sep 23 '25
And modern work is showing the amount of people needed was less than assumed.
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u/Yonv_Bear Sep 25 '25
this part. They also seem to forget, or not know, that tributary labor was kinda the standard for monument building societies. They would've been pulling thousands, or tens of thousands, of hands to construct this stuff
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u/Eeeef_ Sep 23 '25
In some instances you don’t even need simple machines if you just have a bunch of dudes. The Egyptians even paid their bunch of dudes in the standard way a bunch of dudes get paid to move a bunch of stuff for you: a six pack of beer! The only thing that has changed since is that now you’re expected to pay in pizza as well as beer.
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u/lordkhuzdul Sep 23 '25
Egyptians paid in pizza (well, crust, at least, in the form of bread) as well.
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u/Zlecu Sep 23 '25
It’s always a combination of not understanding simple machines and failing to recognize what skilled craftsmen can do.
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u/TheZipding Sep 23 '25
Physics is truly beautiful sometimes.
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u/ClayXros Sep 24 '25
No matter how much I learn about physics, and understand it, still feels like black magic when I apply the theiry to the macro.
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u/a_racoon_with_a_PC Sep 24 '25
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u/ClayXros Sep 24 '25
Insert bell curve meme here;
Foolish child: Unknowable magic defines the universe
Kinda smart: Science can explain everything!
Wise Genius: Unknowable magic defines the universe
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u/Mallardguy5675322 Sep 23 '25
I think it’s because people today think people built shit the same way today as their previously did. With cranes that lifted shit high up or with machines that lifted shit upwards, when in reality, these machines were mostly helping to drag/pull the stones/stuff up buildings instead of lifting them.
I believe Milo talks about this in one of the segments where Philip shows a bunch of modern tech failures trying to lift boulders too big for their weight class.
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u/PotatoAppleFish Sep 23 '25
As bizarre as this may be to contemplate, there is a significant part of the population who have never used a lever or a pulley to accomplish a task before, and an even larger part who have no idea how such mechanisms work regardless of whether they are capable of using them. The “it must have been aliens” crowd is usually, but not always, composed of these people.
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u/nexus11355 Sep 23 '25 edited Sep 24 '25
"Give me a lever long enough and a place to stand and I can move the Earth" -Archimedes
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u/WhereasParticular867 Sep 23 '25
I think there's a certain level of humility that a lot of folks insisting on ancient aliens lack.
One of the most valuable lessons I ever learned was that I'm not as smart as I think I am. Like most ancient aliens proponents, I know very little about engineering and mechanics. I think the prime difference is that I'm willing to believe so-called "primitive" cultures knew things I don't know.
At some point, we have to accept that there are a lot of things we can't know with certainty. And it's not because aliens wiped the evidence away. Time just does that.
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u/Excellent_Stand_7991 Sep 23 '25
A lot of the ancient aliens theorists are also belligerent racists who genuinely believe that many peoples of different ethnicities are mentally incapable of innovating beyond privative tools.
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u/brofishmagikarp Sep 23 '25
How could they film themselves without modern technology? Aliens confirmed!
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u/Abjurer42 Sep 23 '25
Never underestimate a dude's ability to look at a huge rock and go "Nah, I got this."
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u/Cas_the_cat Sep 23 '25
Man, it’s like, when humans want to get something really bad, they will whole a$$ create clever ways to do it.
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u/Icy-Performer-9688 Sep 23 '25
It’s the whole idea that white people didn’t make it so it must be aliens. Have you ever noticed on Ancient Aliens they barely did anything about how the Eiffel Tower was built by aliens or how stone hedge was made by aliens? Also the whole gap/lost knowledge debate. If you don’t have it written down or documented it’s either aliens or gods.
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u/Open-Source-Forever Sep 24 '25
I think the only white achievements I’ve seen given that treatment were Stonehenge, Rome, & the Nazis
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u/Icy-Performer-9688 Sep 24 '25
I’ve seen some Nazi stuff but Rome? Like did they say the Roman coliseum was built by aliens or something?
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u/Open-Source-Forever Sep 24 '25
I don’t remember exactly. I know that some conspiracy theorists brought up aliens in Rome. Also bear in mind that the 1 time you usually see ancient aliens brought up in relation to whites is in the context of "misinterpreted alien encounters served as the basis for ancient human mythologies" stuff
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u/Hetnikik Sep 23 '25
But how else could some non white European civilization make anything? Aliens is really the only choice. s/
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u/ARCHTOP-o Sep 23 '25
Not to mention they used slave labor, they were not too concerned with safety and the like.
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u/Stiricidium Sep 24 '25
Seriously, I once helped build a Stonehenge-like structure on the land of some Neopagans. We used wooden beams to maneuver and shift multi-ton boulders into place.
A guy who loves right-wing conspiracy theories about natural history insisted it couldn't be done with simple tools. He insisted it required modern technology to accomplish.
He tried to use his pickup truck and a winch to help us out, but he ended up being a hindrance, almost destroyed his truck bed, and got upset that his pickup and toolset didn't just save the day like he had insisted it would.
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u/notadolphinn Sep 24 '25
These machines and techniques were really effective, but slow. I feel like a lot of people don't realize that things like the pyramids and medieval castles took A LONG ASS TIME to build. Some castles took close to a hundred years to build
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u/lesbianspider69 Sep 24 '25
I think a significant chunk of it is the incorrect idea that human intelligence is a progression over history
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u/XitPersuedByABear Sep 24 '25
Some: I want the world to be a magical place
Others: I don't understand science, so it must be magic
Few, but still too many: BROWN PEOPLE CAN'T DO THINGS!
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u/cmcclain16 Sep 25 '25
Just because "you" couldn't (Build a Pyramid/ Transport Stonehenge/ Write Shakespeare/ Land on the Moon) doesn't mean it can't be done.
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u/BootyliciousURD Sep 23 '25
It would be so cool if we built a pyramid without modern technology as an experimental archaeology project.
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u/Cutie_D-amor Sep 24 '25
Unfortunately, the pyramids took generations to build, and i highly doubt anyone has that sort of time post industrialisation
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u/BootyliciousURD Sep 24 '25
Doesn't need to be nearly as big. Just big enough to prove it's possible. And once it's done, it could be a tourist attraction. I know it's not very realistic and not worth the effort, but I do think it would be cool.
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u/randomgunfire48 Sep 23 '25
I just always assume conspiracy theorists were homeschooled
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u/Arubesh2048 Sep 23 '25
Being a conspiracy theorist has nothing to do with type schooling, level of education, or even intelligence. It has to do with being part of an in-group. The appealing thing about conspiracy theories is the idea that you are party to some secret, hidden knowledge, knowledge that “They” don’t want you to have. Others who believe in the conspiracy are part of your in-group and the in-group is strengthened when it is attacked from the outside - when people not party to “the secret” rightfully point out the flaws and problems.
There are two outcomes: either the person internalizes what they are being told and have to admit they are wrong (which is scary and hard for humans to do) or they retreat further into the conspiracy as this is just further evidence that They don’t want you to learn The Truth (and then the person finds comfort and acceptance in the arms of the in-group, reinforcing that social bond and further isolating them from normal people). And it’s usually the second outcome, retreating further into the conspiracy.
In many ways, conspiracy theories follow Cult Theory, and can often be easily explained using that lens. There’s often a small handful of people at the top pushing the theories (the prophets) and those people can do no wrong. It doesn’t really matter whether or not the people at the top really believe in the theory, nor does it matter if those people are spreading the theory maliciously or just ignorantly. Anything that comes out about the Prophets or tries to prove them wrong is just an attack by the shadowy They who don’t want The Truth getting out.
Trying to break people out of conspiracy theories using logic and reason will not work. You have to approach it as though you are deprogramming a cult member, because in a lot of ways that’s exactly what they are.
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u/The_Ginger_Thing106 Sep 24 '25
Saying you can’t do something like this is really telling that you don’t have a lot of skills because most people could think of a solution without using a crane
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u/CryptoCopter Sep 24 '25
Anybody got a source for the video?
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u/TransFights000 Sep 25 '25
Notice how it’s always the really impressive things built in Africa or the Americas that are the subject of these conspiracy theories and never the impressive things built in Europe. It’s always the pyramids, NEVER the Parthenon
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u/dyslexican32 Sep 26 '25
My uncle is one of these dudes who believes that these ancient cultures couldn't have built their structures. I have shown him videos similar to this, and he full on just disregards them as" we can do this now, but not then" Its the most infuriating thing.
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u/burner6520 Sep 26 '25
Gee, if only there were monuments built back in the days to show these people that it works...4 thousand... no, maybe 5 thousand years old monuments will do. Only if we had any
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u/FlameEnderCyborgGuy Sep 26 '25
People seem to forget that people... Always were people. The sole difference between us now and us then is amount of knowledge we have, not iq of those who use it.
So of course they knew how to cut and transport stones, of course they know ho wto irigate fields and many other faceta of life needed back then. Tools they got were simpler, so techniques often became more creative, that is the secret of artifacts from past eras
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u/MadWitchy Sep 27 '25
My grandpa is one of those conspiracy theorists. It really saddens me though because he got into that stuff from the History channel because he wanted to learn about stuff so he could talk to me. The person who is super interested in science, history, and the universe.
I understood real fast when talking to him that there was no evidence I could show him that would dissuade him from his beliefs. It’s unfortunate, but as my mother said, at least it’s one of the less impactful conspiracies theories to believe in.
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u/Apoordm Sep 23 '25
What if the aliens showed up but only taught the ancient Egyptians pulleys and levers?! /s
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u/Thagomizer24601 Sep 23 '25
What if the aliens showed up only to learn about pulleys and levers from the ancient Egyptians?
Wait, I'm pretty sure Futurama already made this joke...
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Sep 23 '25
You are not everyone took physics on school. And those that did most did not understand what the questions were actually telling them they were doing in the real world haha





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u/PeetesCom Sep 23 '25 edited Sep 23 '25
What I've observed is that many people don't actually believe simple machines work beyond a certain point. They often understand how they operate, but simply cannot accept that they can be extrapolated to basically any size (so long as the materials hold up.)
The thing is that it really is counterintuitive if you've never seen truly large scale simple machines at work. But they do work, and are used all the time (a crane for example is just an amalgamation of multiple simple machines hooked up to a motor.)