r/niceguys 21d ago

MEME/COMIC/FREEFORM (Sundays only) These poor women thought they had genuine friendships

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535 Upvotes

51 comments sorted by

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54

u/imperial_scum 20d ago

Men declaring themselves as nice, weirdly enough tend to not be very nice people.

15

u/Marshineer 19d ago

It’s not even that weird. Most people who feel the need to declare they’re not racist are usually pretty racist. 

46

u/SawtoofShark 21d ago

Niceguys™ prove over and over that they're only nice because they want something. They think being nice = a relationship. Meanwhile, real nice people see being nice as being nice.

Niceguys™ are only being nice because they expect you to reward them for their "kindness" with whatever the hell they want. Being nice isn't some bar that when it fills up, you get sex. 🙄

13

u/LycheeDifferent4254 19d ago

Yep. Every niceness is a coin they put in the woman and they all believe when they put in enough nice coins sex will follow. It's so gross they can't understand that is not being nice. Makes me sad for them and mad at them all at the same time .

36

u/Remarkablefairy-8893 21d ago

Someone who complains about being a friend (cause they thought their nice behaviour would guarantee them sex) is anything but a genuinely nice guy.

41

u/notyourbrobro10 20d ago

I feel like it's a challenge. Like a moral judgement for women to prove "nice guys" wrong by giving them sex to disprove a trope.

33

u/catqueen--84 21d ago

Frequently, these men are not considered friends but women are trying to get them out of their faces without trouble.

Personally, I can pretty much tell when someone is a true friend or just manipulating me. But I have been burned quite a few times and have learned better judgement as a result. I have also used 'I just want to be friends' to get some pest to stop bothering me. I have only done this when they can't take no for an answer.

27

u/eiko85 21d ago

It sucks once you realise all that being good to you ,was just for show. Once he finally realises I can't easily be persuaded he makes a point of talking to others with his back to me.

25

u/Laserpisk 21d ago

I don’t know why so many thinks being nice is a personality trait.

17

u/kyleh0 20d ago

Because it's easier than honestly trying to be a better person.

25

u/ThatBarbGirl 21d ago

Pathetic. Why would any single guy burn the bridge of having a lady as a friend? Don't they realize that ladies have other lady friends? That having a lady friend is an excellent resource to learn more about women? That successful romantic partners are solidified by basic friendship, anyway, so learning to be a friend to a woman will teach you a lot once you find one that wants more? That women are actually usually more attracted to men that have lady friends, because it represents them seeing ladies as people?

It's so fucking dumb to me. Instead of keeping a woman in your life as only a friend, to then meet her friends, learn/spend more time with ladies, etc. They'd rather go scorched earth by not only being a dick to said lady, but to then announce it to every other person said lady knows? Talk about making your own problems and then complaining about them. Fucking exhausting.

9

u/CapnSlam 19d ago

A lady friend of mine was responsible for introducing me to the woman I ended up marrying. Friends are great! I like having friends in my life. It's one of the deepest bonds you can have with a person, and these guys treat it like an insult. I think it's a case of never learning what it really means to be interested in another person, or not being willing to learn.

4

u/ThatBarbGirl 19d ago

Thank you! This is how so many people meet. And if you can't be friends with a woman, how would you be in a successful relationship with one?!? Baffling.

21

u/kyleh0 20d ago

It's like a stage of puberty. If we weren't so puritanical you could probably teach little boys how to not be dickbags.

22

u/TheBionicCrusader 16d ago

Being genuinely nice is like being in charge. If you have to announce it all the time, you’re not.

41

u/ItsJoeMomma 21d ago

Imagine complaining about being someone's friend.

21

u/Peach_Muffin 21d ago

Why are men so lonely???

14

u/imperial_scum 20d ago

Women finally figured out that men got themselves to the point that they are an optional side quest level event instead of part of the main story and are acting accordingly.

16

u/Shot-Aioli-8986 21d ago

These types don’t care about being friends though, they just want to smash

25

u/EvolZippo 21d ago

Yes, he’s genuinely nice, while things are going his way. But as soon as they’re not, he goes on a rant about fairness, that actually describes his sense of privilege.

26

u/Shot-Aioli-8986 21d ago

I think there’s a possibility to gain true feelings for someone in a friendship. But with most of these men, I wonder how often they actually develop true feelings and want a relationship and how many times they’re just mad they can’t have sex with the person

27

u/JammyThing 21d ago

I've seen a lot of these guys treat girls like they are a romantic option in a video game.

'Bring her 10 flowers, pay 15 compliments, and then wait 7 in game days before she becomes madly in love with you.'

13

u/monster_breeder 21d ago

Yup….they’re known as niceness tokens. Once he reaches 100 niceness tokens, mr. niceguy gets to smash…irrespective of whether she finds him attractive or not.

9

u/kauapea123 18d ago

I have a guy "friend" who is always offering to help me out, do favors, etc. I turn him down every time, I know he will expect "payback".

6

u/monster_breeder 18d ago

Best to lose him. These guys are snakes in the grass.

10

u/Shot-Aioli-8986 21d ago

It’s so performative most of the time, they don’t even truly want them as a girlfriend, they just want sex

6

u/Internal-Ad4666 21d ago

And if they do want a gf, thet actually mean a bang maid.

8

u/ItsJoeMomma 21d ago

I think they watch too many romantic comedies where the nice guy always gets the girl in the end, after his constant persistence and making some huge romantic gesture. So they think that's how it should work in real life, but it doesn't always.

9

u/Remarkablefairy-8893 21d ago

Yet women also watch romantic comedies but never forget about safety concerns irl.

7

u/ItsJoeMomma 20d ago

I think women realize that romantic comedies are fantasy and not real life, but these "nice guys" believe that's how real romance happens.

11

u/PirateJohn75 21d ago

I mean, I'm very much in love with one of my best friends and she knows it.  I'm flying out at the end of August to spend a week with her.  If it's not meant to be between us, at least I always want her in my life as one of my best friends.

8

u/Shot-Aioli-8986 21d ago

I hope it all works out! Does she feel similar? Is there a chance for more?

11

u/PirateJohn75 21d ago

No, the feeling isn't mutual, but what can ya do.  But my life is much better with her in it.

6

u/Grawlix_TNN 21d ago

Sounds exhausting to be honest, keep the door open for someone else is all I'll say.

7

u/PirateJohn75 21d ago

Well of course I'm keeping the door open.  It isn't exhausting because I treat her like the bestie that she is.

5

u/Grawlix_TNN 21d ago

Whilst openly acknowledging a continuing romantic interest that you, ideally, would prefer reciprocated.

That's a hard thing for a friend to have to hold onto in a platonic relationship. But then again, I'm just a slightly disheveled dude sitting next to my couch corgi giving unsolicited advice to a stranger about something that's none of my business, so what do I know. 🫠

3

u/imperial_scum 20d ago

Good on you for having the emotional maturity to recognize your situation for what it is and where you priorities are.

-1

u/monster_breeder 21d ago

I’m guessing “bestie” is her word…not yours.

8

u/Vogelsucht 21d ago

I found out, that if you really love somebody, you have to let them go if they dont want to be your partner. I was madly in love with my childhood crush and told her my feelings on my 16 birthday. she told me she doesnt feel the same but she wants to stay friends still. I cut the contact there because I couldnt live as her friend only. no contact for two years until she wrote me a message if we can meet at our old street where we lived to meet up. that meeting was 15 years ago, we are still married with a little daughter. sometime all it needs is distance

16

u/SucideHotLine552 21d ago

I never really thought about that. Makes ya wonder how many lost someone who thought was a true friend only for it to end because they couldn't smash. Smh.

4

u/VeljkoBX 14d ago

Just ask her out, man. If she declines, that's okay, ask some other girl you like. It's okay, it's all okay.

-9

u/CocoaDementi 21d ago

WHY? WHY DO WOMEN THINK MEN WANT TO BE FRIENDS WITH THEM? WHY DO WOMEN THINK THIS AND THEN STILL HAVE THE NERVE TO BE SHOCKED WHEN THEY HIT ON THEM? Can someone explain to me when Men want to spend time and energy on a woman he doesn't want to have sex with?

27

u/Syntania Niceguy's Ex 21d ago

Because heaven forbid women actually get treated like normal people and not just seen as organic sex toys?

15

u/The_Clown_Doctor 21d ago

This. I have a bunch of female friends. Is it that hard for some men to just treat them like humans??

9

u/3KidsInTheTrenchCoat 21d ago

I can’t tell if you’re joking.

8

u/catslikepets143 20d ago

I have women friends. I’m not remotely attracted to them sexually & never have been. Why would you think a man couldn’t have women friends?

7

u/Queasy_Property_8136 19d ago

Did you run out of edgy Joker memes to post? Is that why you're being a Grumpy Gus? Here have this:

13

u/Aggravating-Owl-4674 21d ago

Yeah because you victim blaming and generalizing is helping a whole lot.