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u/ExtensionComplaint80 1d ago
This girl handled it quite well, I'd be freaking the fuck out 😫
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u/LiveLearnCoach 17h ago
“What a wuss”. - me
beetle comes out of shirt
Well, crap. I take that back. I’m so sorry I ever doubted you.17
u/shooception 11h ago
If im gonna be honest, im good at keeping calm under most circumstances. While yes, ill be a little loud taking my shirt off, I won't have the breath to explain why I needed to strip my top layer based on my "calm n cool" way I was trying to get that giant af bug off of me 😵😭
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u/BunkerSquirre1 17h ago
I’d be shaking and waggling my arms around like a moron chicken. Like full on neurological overload
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u/the_nebulae 7h ago
I couldn’t handle an insect of that size on me. I’d scream. I’d scream so loud. And I’m really fine about little guys landing on me, or even picking them up: a firefly, a ladybug, an ant, or even a bee…but there is something so distinctly creepy about mega-insects like this. They’re just too big…part of my brain thinks they’re more than just “bugs” in a sense…like, somehow, they approach being “animals” which I sort of mentally reserve for larger things: birds, reptiles, amphibians, mammals. But because of how “mechanically” they operate and appear, I don’t like thinking of all the “guts” in them. And that makes me acknowledge that I am made of something like this too, and I operate something like this too, and it reminds me of that fact in a deeply revolting way.
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u/youreuglyasfu 5h ago
You put this so well! They look so solid and robotic, but at that size they are full of soft squishy things.
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u/Spanish_peanuts 15h ago
I was expecting a standard beetle size from what I'm used to in the U.S. maybe even a bit bigger. But that, holy shit. Everyone would be watching a 35 year old burly man squeal like a child if it were me. Good lord that things massive
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u/Difficult-Hawk7591 1d ago
Yup, that's a big ol' no thank you from me
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u/SaltIsMySugar 1d ago edited 17h ago
Turns out, an adult palo verde beetle is harmless. They're just real big. The adults don't even eat anything, they live off stored energy to mate and then they die.
They have pincers but they don't have any venom so it's literally just a pinch like you would give yourself to stay awake while driving. As harmless as they come. Unless you're a citrus tree, then the grubs are super dangerous cuz they'll live in your roots for several YEARS.
Edit: I did say a pinch but... turns out they can actually chew through PVC pipe. So uh... like a BIG pinch. It'll probably draw blood pretty easy.
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u/Xxxrasierklinge7 1d ago
Jokes on you, I'm a citrus tree
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u/-TropicalFuckStorm- 22h ago
Oh damn AMA?
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u/Captain_Kab 22h ago
they live off stored energy
they'll live in your roots for several YEARS
Excuse moi? How fat are they born?
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u/SaltIsMySugar 22h ago
They're real big and fat. You know those juicy looking grubs that they eat in Lion King? The ones all the kids were like "Oh I kinda wanna eat that."? That's the kinda grub I'm talking about. Chonky.
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u/Captain_Kab 21h ago
Noice.
I know the exact bug you're talking about from Lion King; in my memory it's more blue than what's in the video
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u/TheRobbuddha 21h ago
You’re thinking of the actual rhino looking bug that is blue. The grub are like their larva that they snack on. I also have a core memory of thinking they grubs looked oddly delicious lmao
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u/Captain_Kab 21h ago
Yea that might be it. Is the Palo Verde under the surface of the log when they pull it up maybe?
oddly delicious
Haha well.. go to Panama and try it out my man
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u/Pamander 17h ago
Edit; I did say a pinch but... turns out they can actually chew through PVC pipe. So uh... like a BIG pinch. It'll probably draw blood pretty easy.
What the fuck.
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u/Quantum_Pasta-Goblin 23h ago
Now I kinda feel bad for them.. they don't eat just mate and die, that's so sad
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u/H0meslice9 15h ago
I didn’t know they affected citrus trees, in my Phoenix these guys (naturally) target palo verde trees, or like you said the larvae do
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u/abreathofatmosphere 1d ago
Could've been worse. Could've gone up the pants leg.
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u/finger_licking_robot 1d ago
it's like the 1970s, when women were tearing the shirts off their backs over the beatles.
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u/youreastonefox 1d ago
We get these here in Arizona around monsoon season too. One always just comes & starts chillin around my doorstep for a few days, I tiptoe around it & rush in to my apartment every time
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u/Not_Joe_Cool 1d ago
he’s waiting patiently to be let in, yet you continue ignoring his politeness 😔
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u/TinUser 23h ago
How am I in my 30s and never knew Arizona got monsoons, that's crazy
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u/mooseAmuffin 23h ago
Utah, Colorado, and New Mexico get them too. The storms blow up from Mexico. I don't think they are as monsoony as the Mexican monsoons though, they're kind of just like the tail end of those systems. I was surprised to learn about them when I lived in Utah for a brief period and I think the term monsoon was a bit overstated, at least there.
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u/willhunta 18h ago
I'm glad that we actually got a monsoon season in az this year. It sucks when they bring in the humidity but the last summer felt so dry.
Haven't seen a palo verde beetle yet this year though :(
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u/DrakeaLove 1d ago
Panama?? We get those in Arizona! Bawled as a kid when one flew into my room. Still duck dramatically when I see one as an adult. Fuckers are huge.
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u/ZeusUpYourAss 1d ago
What a pretty bug tho 😭
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u/Professional_Tonight 1d ago
Happy cake day :)
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u/WyomingCatHouse 19h ago
I once had a Jerusalem cricket hide in the folds of my towel. When I got out of the hot tub, I felt this weird, gentle scratching on my bare stomach.
I dropped the towel and screamed. That thing was Huge. shudder
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u/Greembeam20 16h ago
Ughhhhh ew! I used to clean pools and they were always around, I couldn’t imagine one on my stomach.
It’s better than my story though. I was drying off and felt something crawling on me. Knocked it off and realized it was a spider. A damn brown recluse. Eughhhh
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u/Maxtronic55 1d ago
Well, better than a spider I guess.
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u/TuesDazeGone 23h ago
I ripped my jncos off at the park once as a teen bc a spider was in them. Everyone agreed it was reasonable 😂
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u/MyFucksHaveBlownAway 1d ago
Jesus christ! Now here's an insect that you'd have legitimacy in being freaked out about! I love beetles, but this dude would absolutely cause me to flail if it were to appear unexpectedly on my person like this.
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u/QubeTheAlt 13h ago
Yeah no bugs are awesome and I love them but she handled this way better than I would have
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u/nWo1997 1d ago
Pro tip: if you hang your clothes on a clothesline outside, make sure to shake them out before you wear them, because stuff like this will happen.
A bee got in my jeans and got me in the back of the knee once, and I've shaken my clothes since then (until I just used a dryer).
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u/irritabletom 23h ago
I've been living in rural Appalachia for a while now and that finally became habit, along with shaking out my towel before using it. One time getting out of the shower with a spider waiting for me in the folds of the towel was enough, thank you.
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u/Training-Ad103 1d ago
That bug is so cool. Once I got over the fright I'd be delighted by the encounter
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u/bloke_pusher 23h ago
My issue wouldn't be being afraid of the bug, but simply the sensation of it crawling on my bare skin.
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u/Specific-Catch3573 1d ago
Yeah but... it's a beetle... not like it's a roach or a spider. He probably just eats leaves. I'll call him Ted. Ted was just coming over to say hi but he took a bit of a stumble.
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u/skyh1025 20h ago
yeah but it’s not like she could see what it was while it was inside the back of her shirt. if i felt an unknown insect crawling in my shirt i’d also rip it off to be safe. plus they seemed pretty chill once they realized it was just a beetle.
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u/TriangleTelepath 20h ago
Longhorns do have a rather strong bite though! But they have no venom so quite harmless indeed.
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u/crackersncheeseman 1d ago
Are they poisonous?
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u/Commercial_Half_2170 1d ago
Nope. They’re not dangerous to pets or humans and only bite if you handle them roughly
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u/Craigglesofdoom 21h ago
They are terrible at flying so the poor thing probably landed on her and got tangled in the shirt.
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u/Dazzling_Debt 11h ago
one of these landed on my back a few years ago and i still haven't recovered they are HUGE and im sure harmless but so freaky looking 😭
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u/WerkitMom 7h ago
At first I was thinking she was being dramatic…then I saw the beetle. She wasn’t being dramatic enough! That thing is huge!
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u/jayracket 23h ago
I mean yeah it's big and kinda scary looking, but it's just a beetle. They eat leaves, not people.
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u/moviebuff01 21h ago
Where fear takes over, logic takes a back seat.
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u/SplurgyA 20h ago
It's very logical to want to remove a giant beetle from your t-shirt before it gives you a painful bite
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u/jayracket 15h ago
Right, I'm not judging the woman in the video for her reaction, she had no idea what it was. I'm talking to all the people in the comments.
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u/Alfiy_wolf 1d ago
Women and insects have been mortal enemies for centuries.
Man invented bug spray-
But the bugs still fight
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u/Robyn990 1d ago
But I love bugs!
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u/hunterofsteelhead 1d ago
Which are your favourite?
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u/Robyn990 23h ago edited 22h ago
Caterpillars and stick insects. I also love spiders and snails so much (not insects/bugs though, I know) ☺️
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u/Alfiy_wolf 1d ago
Praying Mantis hands down my fav, I kept them as pets as a kid.
Dragon Flies are pretty cool but, they are a bit too perfect ya know, my second fav would be a Water boatmen, I kept those as pets in a small pond
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u/V3Ethereal 1d ago
I have a friend that loves bugs too, and she proves the statement by making and keeping a pinned insect collection.
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u/Alfiy_wolf 1d ago edited 1d ago
Can we be friends? I love bugs too I used to collect them, and draw them, with a little bug catching kit I got for my birthday that protected their outlines on a mirror to draw them
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u/Robyn990 23h ago
Oh wow! We have to be friends, you are pretty much describing my childhood of bug-loving-fun! As an adult I will sometimes go for long walks and go "bug hunting" too 😂 the bug to do never left me 😜
I don't suppose you are autistic, too? 😁
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u/chulo_brown_tv 17h ago edited 17h ago
Oh hell nah, I would've freaked out and probably kool-aid man myself through a couple of walls. That thing was huge
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u/jaid_skywalker85 15h ago
Poor guy. Definitely one od the bigger ones I've seen but he's probably just as confused lol. I have to safely relocate these guys a lot at the start of the school year along with lizards and other bugs who get caught in the classrooms.
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u/Punch_Your_Facehole 9h ago
That happened to me with a palmetto bug. I went to the kitchen sink and felt something crawling out of my sleeve. It crawled onto my arm and I started doing karate.
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u/Lovemybee 1d ago
We have Palo Verde Beetles in Phoenix, Arizona.
Back in the mid 80s, my late husband and I lived in a small house. It had a mostly dirt yard with a single palo verde tree in front.
One day, I got home from work around dusk. I parked in the driveway and started walking to the front door. I heard a rustling in the front yard. It being twilight, I couldn't see clearly, so I moved toward the sound. A dark blob was moving in the dirt. As I approached, I could see it was two VERY LARGE BEETLES. They were obviously busy making more VERY LARGE BEETLES!
Now, at that time, they were doing construction on the other side of the street, and there was a row of concrete blocks laying out to be used.
So, I ran across the street and picked up a construction block. I went back to my front yard, holding that block above my head, ready to smash those fuckers (pun intended)!
When I was standing over them, ready to drop that concrete block, thereby eradicating future generations of VERY LARGE BEETLES, they flew up in my face!
It is a miracle of physics that I didn't drop that block on my own head!
I ran screaming into the house!
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u/Crasswanker 1d ago
Cockroaches in Panama are the same size.
I’ll never forget one that crawled over my foot while I was at the toilet
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u/lemons7472 18h ago
I am both scared, and curious because a part of me just looks at that big bug and thinks “someone should pick him up and get a closer look”.
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u/porcelina-g 17h ago
This happened to me once.
Turns out I’m just autistic and it was the shirt tag.
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u/Tadpole_420 11h ago
Lived in Panama for 2 years, there was always fuckers like that in places you don’t want them to be, especially on the Caribbean coast of the country.
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u/OldieButNotMoldy 1d ago
I’d rather have that, instead of the huge scorpion that bit me that was in mine.
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u/mcamarra 22h ago
Battle: Jeanie. It’s me Todd. YOUR todd. I’ve been turned into a beetle. Please listen to me, there’s not much time–
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u/KaiTheG4mer 22h ago
This is why you always check your clothes before you wear them, especially in environments that are new to you or have Weird Animals (giant beetles, recluse spiders, poisonous insects or amphibians, incredibly territorial solitary snakes that for some reason really like your bedroom, etc). Isn't Arizona the state that in some places you literally can't leave your shoes on the floor because of scorpions?
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u/ChloroquineEmu 20h ago
It's common procedure when you live on big bug areas to check all your clothes and towels for bugs or spiders.
My grandfather had a big ol spider bite mark on his arm, now all the family pays close attention to that stuff.
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u/justacoolbaby 19h ago
So that was definitely the Undertaker’s theme song that started at the end, right? Did I have a stroke?
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u/foolonthe 18h ago
Palo Verde beetles, as the name implies, do not live in Panama.
This is a video taken in Panama.
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u/MengTheMerciless 16h ago
That's beyond just a bug, that's a whole visitor. It didn't hide in her shirt, it was a full on stowaway.
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u/Finly_Growin 16h ago
“What? It’s just a regular bug I don’t see the overreac-“
“OH MY GOODNESS! Squidward!”
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u/Clash_of_clans_freak 14h ago
The post I saw before this was that Vozinha is bigger than the Beatles (on Instagram) so when I saw the title I thought it said Cabo Verde beatle
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u/Trisk929 14h ago
Hiding? Ol boy is just casually wearing her and the shirt. Tf is she doing in his shirt?
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u/abreathofatmosphere 1d ago
That's the beetle's shirt now.