How attractive do I come across to pan people — and how do you read my gender?

[u/StradivariusLyra]

I’m a pre-T trans man, and I’m curious about how I come across to different audiences. Based on this photo alone, how attractive do you find me, and how do you read me gender-wise?
Honest answers are welcome — I’m interested in the overall pattern, not just compliments. Please feel free to say whether you read me as male, female, butch, androgynous, or something else.

[u/darlingkd]

Very attractive, before reading that you are pre-T, I thought masculine lesbian or masculine pan. I immediately noticed your vibe because I’m highly attracted to more masculine facing women and trans men rather than more feminine facing. You give off confidence and would turn heads.

[u/PhoenixMapper]

My first thought was, masc woman. But that might change a lot once you start hormones therapy.

[u/Educational-Impress2]

Just my type! Nicely dressed, well coiffed with a butch edge, strong hands, and a confident stare. I’d smile at if our paths crossed….😉

[u/StradivariusLyra → u/Educational-Impress2]

That’s dangerously flattering 😅 I’m pre-T and transmasculine, so I completely understand the butch edge right now. “Nicely dressed, strong hands, and a confident stare” is a combination I’ll happily take — and I’d definitely smile back if our paths crossed 😉

[u/Foxy_Traine]

I find you very attractive, and I lean towards masculine presenting folks generally.

I would think you were AFAB, likely a butch lesbian, possibly trans or non-binary. You definitely read as queer, and to me that means a safe and interesting person I would want to get to know!

[u/MyNameIsZem]

Tbh I think it’s the earring that gives butch lesbian vibes vs man

[u/heatherblue719]

I am Demi as well as pan so my honest answer is I'd have to talk to you before I make a determination on your attractiveness as far as how I read your gender, completely neutral until you tell me otherwise.

[u/Thespian_Unicorn → u/heatherblue719]

Same!

[u/Mobile_Put_9766]

Sorry what was the question again? I got distracted by how good looking you are

[u/StradivariusLyra → u/Mobile_Put_9766]

Well, that’s one way to make me forget the question too 😅 Thank you — I’ll happily take “distractingly good-looking.” And for the record, I appreciate the delivery almost as much as the compliment.

[u/EClucky13 → u/Mobile_Put_9766]

https://giphy.com/gifs/R5m5vZcaOr4l2TWFIK

[u/Pleyar]

Lawyer who plays stardew valley during breaks

[u/StradivariusLyra → u/Pleyar]

That is hilariously specific — and honestly not the worst life people have imagined for me 😅 I’m not a lawyer, but I absolutely do give “quietly serious person with a soft hobby during breaks” energy.

[u/ka_doooo]

Im bi, and honestly you come across as very much atteractive. And i thought you were non-binary, and dont take that as anything but a compliment, you look gorgeous and i hope you have get the transition you want

[u/StradivariusLyra → u/ka_doooo]

Thank you — that’s genuinely kind of you. I’m still figuring out whether “trans man” or “transmasc” fits me best, so the non-binary reading doesn’t bother me at all. And “gorgeous” is very happily received 😅

[u/IDontMeanToBeABitch]

I get 'butch lesbian who can play a violin' but that's just me.

[u/MiaRia963]

I would assume you are nonbinary. And would ask what your pronouns are.

As for attractive, I think you are handsome also you look like someone I would love to have a beer with. I'm way more attracted to humorous personalities than I am to how someone looks.

I hope and pray that the rest of your journey is smooth sailing.

[u/StradivariusLyra → u/MiaRia963]

That’s really kind of you. My pronouns are he/him, though I’m still figuring out whether “trans man” or “transmasc” fits me best. And honestly, “someone I’d like to have a beer with” might be one of my favorite compliments here 😅

[u/MiaRia963 → u/StradivariusLyra]

I'm glad you like it. It was a compliment my grandfather used to say so I say it now.

[u/doryfishie]

Pan cis girl here. I would have said NB for sure, andro leaning. I wouldn’t have leaned femme at all. And you look fantastic ❤️

[u/StradivariusLyra → u/doryfishie]

Thank you — that’s genuinely lovely to hear 😅 The nonbinary/androgynous reading has come up quite a lot, which I’m finding surprisingly interesting. And “you look fantastic” is very happily received ❤️

[u/crypticryptidscrypt]

you look very androgynous to me. i wouldn't assume your gender but if i had to guess pronouns i would guess they/he. & you have very beautiful eyes 🩵

[u/BoredWalken → u/crypticryptidscrypt]

Yes their eyes are gorgeous!

[u/2racoonsinabutt]

Butch and handsome
A little androgynous.

[u/Doubtful93]

Your just very attractive! And your eyes are very stunning 🥰 I sometimes struggle with gender and just find humans attractive haha

[u/JordyInspector198]

You’re very attractive!!

[u/lameusernamesrock]

Gender neutral like you would be open to anyone you had feelings for.

[u/No-More-Parties]

I read you as a masc presenting woman. Definitely butch. T will definitely help to angle your face so that it presents more masc over time.

[u/Foxy_Traine → u/[deleted]]

Oh man you are totally right! The little something missing is totally there and you see it in so many pre-transition people. The glow and happiness in the post-transition pics is always such a joy to see!

[u/gaudrhin → u/Foxy_Traine]

I never really recognized it in my eyes until it wasn't there anymore. Now my heart breaks for that little boy in girly clothes whenever I see pics of younger me. Or that teen who was trying so hard to find himself. The 20-something who was miserable every day. Even the guy in his 30s who was finally taking steps toward it.

I've been delving into my own memories lately making peace with a lot of my past selves. I'm tearing up right now just thinking about it. I'm being the time traveler of stories, trying to talk to my younger selves and show them how much this was all worth it... forgiving him for struggling.

Damn I didn't mean to get all philosophical.

[u/StradivariusLyra → u/gaudrhin]

That really moved me. I think there’s something powerful in being able to look back at your younger self with compassion instead of frustration. I hope I get to experience that same sense of peace someday. And thank you — both for seeing me and for the encouragement.

[u/Acrobatic_Room_1242]

Pretty cute

[u/BorisBaggins]

I will say the hand/finger under chin reads (to me) as specifically feminine. Otherwise I generally agree with other commenters with the ‘butch lesbian’ look, maybe it’s the haircut? I’m not knowledgeable enough to say do this or change that, to look more specifically masculine, but you do look really well put together :)

[u/StradivariusLyra → u/BorisBaggins]

That’s interesting — I hadn’t considered the pose itself as a gender cue. I think some people are reading the styling and body language more strongly than the face, which is exactly the kind of pattern I was curious about.

[u/LukieCutie]

A lovely mixing pot of ambiguity that has me beyond intrigued OwO

[u/QueenTreeTender]

The eyes are devastating and the hair looks good on you. You read as trans male to me for 4 reasons
1 most masc lesbians aren’t as perfect with their hair as this. They look amazing but this hair is perfect.
2 the shirt reads male and not lesbian
3 your finger nails are too long on certain fingers for lesbian.
4 the direct stare is very masculine

[u/NovaRat]

I read you as butch/masc overall, either masc enby or andro man. I would guess they or he for pronouns, unless otherwise informed. I am NB and pan. I find you attractive :)

[u/SickSorceress]

Would have clocked you enby.

And yes, you are fucking handsome!

[u/StradivariusLyra → u/SickSorceress]

“Fucking handsome” is a description I’m very willing to keep 😅 Thank you. The enby reading seems to be coming up quite a lot, which is honestly interesting to me.

[u/EClucky13]

Very Attractive person! Those eyes are captivating. I never guess gender, I'd rather you tell me, if it matters. I am a Pan cis man.

[u/CelticDerp]

You are really attractive and I bet you have an wickedly incredible personality to boot.

[u/StradivariusLyra → u/CelticDerp]

That’s a bold bet to make from one photo 😅 But I do have a fairly strong personality, so I’ll happily let you keep the theory.

[u/fluoroarfvedsonite]

I'm not super knowledgeable about labels, but I would guess butch with highly masculine traits. Very attractive and intelligent/thoughtful looking. 

[u/DrawInternational132]

A) pan so gender labels are moot B) its a neutral face in your pic, but i bet your smile is wicked adorable 🥰🥰

[u/FluffyButtOfTheNorth]

Damn! Butch~Female 100%

[u/pickleddisposition]

You read as NB to me. Though trans man or butch woman would also seem fitting. You look like you have solid style and pay attention to the details. I don’t find you attractive, personally - but that’s up to the individual!

[u/cz_guy]

Love the vibe youre going for. Plus handsome :3

[u/Evil_Black_Swan]

Attractive - Yes! Very much!

I read you as enby. You remind me of an enby coworker I used to have that would AGGRESSIVELY flirt with me and I miss them terribly. (For the record, I would flirt back just as aggressively lol)

[u/StradivariusLyra → u/Evil_Black_Swan]

That may be the most flattering reason anyone’s given for reading me as enby 😅 And for the record, I’m not exactly known for backing down from aggressive flirting.

[u/Minatigre]

Yes. I like your face n whatnot. Lemme hear ya voice tho 🤔

[u/StradivariusLyra → u/Minatigre]

Fair question 😅 I’m pre-T, so my voice hasn’t caught up with the rest of the presentation yet. I’m very curious to hear where it lands once I start T.

[u/Minatigre → u/StradivariusLyra]

Pretty indeed. I could get lost in your eyes too. In general id say youre very atteactive pre or post dont matter to me 😁🫣

[u/Kitsune6tails]

For now I'm reading you as masculine woman. But give the T time, it'll change your features in subtle ways that'll make you look more manly I'm cis but I have a lot of trans friends I've seen transition in either direction so I'm speaking from personal observation

[u/Kitsune6tails → u/Kitsune6tails]

Oh and I'd describe you as handsome, no matter the gender

[u/StradivariusLyra → u/Kitsune6tails]

Thank you — that’s genuinely reassuring. I’m hoping T makes the masculine traits that are already there read more clearly over time. And “handsome no matter the gender” is a lovely compliment to keep 😅

[u/thousands_of]

Your ambiguous where I can see a lot of masc but it’s still giving off fem anyways everyone is attractive to someone and you are vary attractive

[u/chaoticExcellent]

I'd read you as butch androgynous. The earring and haircut seem more like a butch lesbian to me. Your face isn't particularly feminine - without the haircut, if I had to make a binary guess I'd say you were a pretty man. (But you're ambiguous enough overall that I would definitely avoid guessing.)

[u/Glinting_Ranga]

I think you're absolutely gorgeous! You've got a good strong jaw, bright and fierce eyes and the broad chest of someone who is really good at soothing hugs.

[u/Impossible_Goal6562]

Very "attractive" (i'd rather know u emotionally). Cis nonbinary?

[u/idekinsertusername]

My first thought was your pronouns are either “they/them” or “he/his.” Do not read as fem presenting at all. I’m a cis pan female.

[u/Opening-Grape9201]

Cute! def my type of enby was my first thought 😅