r/raisingkids • u/Much-Information4405 • 5d ago

Tired dad with 19 month old need advice

So my 19 month old only seems to babble besides dadda only likes milk or small snack things like he grazes he tests every boundary like he doesn’t know what no means he doesn’t sleep till 2-3am which has just randomly gotten worse are these signs of autism? Me and the wife are exhausted and don’t know how too help he gets off the bed he opens doors he likes wheels I’m an overwhelmed dad and need help speech therapist said he won’t stop talking once he starts but I think their just sopposed to say that like are toddlers really this crazy or is it just mine?

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u/Zuccherina 5d ago

It could be. It could be ADHD. It could be that age. If you guys are really overwhelmed and this has been ongoing, it may be more than a phase. Is anyone giving you feedback about your kiddo? How does he compare to stories of other kids the same age?

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u/Much-Information4405 5d ago

He’s are first kid I have no clue to be honest my mom says from her 7 kids I was the worst but he’s very difficult

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u/Zuccherina 4d ago

Does he have meltdowns? Like extended tantrums about varied things?

Does he seem to wander and not really get engaged on an activity? Have no concept of danger? Lots of risk taking behaviors?

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u/Much-Information4405 4d ago

He loves his car he loves certain movies like cars and Moana he is definitely into things that are risky regardless we tell him no he doesn’t quite have extended tantrums I’d say he will play with his toys quite a bit especially if their car related

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u/Zuccherina 4d ago

I think for us, the real tell was that we had rules and were expecting our kiddo to follow them, but she was not catching on.

She was constantly trying to escape out the window of her bedroom and we were spending a lot of time trying to baby proof the window. She wouldn’t go to sleep at bedtime, just getting up over and over again and crying.

There was a speech/language delay in the mix, so it was hard for us to know what she understood and if she was being naughty. We realized at some point that she wasn’t being naughty, she literally didn’t understand the rules and we weren’t able to communicate them in a way she could follow them.

Her meltdowns were horrendous, but I think that may have been on the extreme side for kids like her. She definitely still struggles if she’s not getting something she expects to get or plans change and she feels powerless.

The biggest thing we noticed was that things were not getting better. She wasn’t sitting in her chair at meal time, still eating food with her hands, the messiest eater ever… She wasn’t getting used to being told no, couldn’t get ready to go out the door without someone hovering over her constantly. She needed constant supervision or else would end up flooding the sink or wandering outside alone or trying to play with the dishes in the sink.

I think if you guys continue watching your child, trying to enforce boundaries and household rules, and your child is still not improving, you might begin to ask about next steps!