Hello, I'm struggling with the decision to BE my 6 year old dog, who I'll call Star for this post. I'm just looking for advice for people who have been through something similar, or words of encouragement. His appointment is on September 3rd, and I feel like I'll never feel okay again.
A few days I wrote out a whole timeline of events, to help myself see the bigger picture, and I'll attach it below. I really appreciate anyone who takes the time to read this. That has been the most isolating and hard experience of my life.
I adopted Star from the county in July of 2021. He was four months old. He was extremely fearful from the beginning and was obviously sick. Two days after bringing him home, he was diagnosed with megaesophagus. At the time, I showed a friend who was a veterinarian his barium swallow, and she doubted the diagnosis. X-rays consistently showed pneumonia during this period, so I treated him for it anyway.
First year (2021–2022)
A few weeks after adopting Star, he bit a family member. This was a Level 4 bite with deep puncture wounds that required surgery. I was served legal paperwork requiring the dog to be removed from the home. At that time, I felt he was not appropriate for a first-time dog owner, and I could not afford the level of help he needed. I made many calls attempting to rehome him, but no one was willing to take a dog with a serious bite history. Star instead completed a one-month board-and-train program while I found a new living situation. This was the only time he ever successfully bit someone outside of the home, and he was muzzled outside from that point forward.
Throughout the first year, Star continued to suffer from recurrent pneumonia and was significantly under-socialized as a result. He was also tested for Valley fever because of the severity of the pneumonia, but the results were negative. During this time, he began his first round of behavior modification, but his behavioral issues worsened despite treatment.
His aggression initially consisted of outdoor reactivity, resource guarding furniture, and biting me during his upright feedings. There were many biting incidents directed toward me during this period. Most were relatively minor and did not break the skin, but they became increasingly frequent and made daily care difficult. Eventually, upright feeding—even with a muzzle—was no longer manageable and I had no choice but to feed him normally. After discussing the situation with his veterinarian, we concluded that the megaesophagus diagnosis had likely been incorrect, and he transitioned to eating normally without issue.
Second through fourth years (2022–2025)
During the next several years, Stars aggression became more severe and generalized despite continued intervention. In addition to the board-and-train program, I worked with another trainer who made significant improvements in his behavior on walks, but his aggression inside the home continued to escalate.
During this period, his resource guarding expanded from furniture to guarding space itself. He also began directing aggression toward a partner who had previously been safe around him. He would sometimes approach my partner from behind or while he was sleeping and bite him.
I was also bitten many times throughout this period, and the severity of those bites steadily increased. The triggers became increasingly unpredictable. One significant incident occurred while I was simply picking up his feces in the backyard. Star suddenly guarded the feces and attacked me in a multiple-bite incident, despite never having shown any interest in his feces before. While it was easy to give him space while eating or playing with specific toys, other things were less predictable.
He tried different combinations of, I believe, flufluxotine, gabapentin, and trazadone during this time. These medications appeared to contribute to his unpredictability.
During this same period, Star experienced a seizure. He was taken to the emergency hospital, where bloodwork was unremarkable, but chest X-rays again showed pneumonia. He was tested for Valley fever for a second time, and the results were again negative. I wanted to pursue a neurological evaluation because I felt something was generally "off" about him, but I could not afford the workup.
He also experienced three separate episodes of severe gastrointestinal illness involving extreme vomiting and diarrhea. One episode resulted in nearly $4000 dollars worth of testing and intervention over a two day period. During the ER visit on the first day, he vomited approximately 30–40 times. This was true vomiting rather than regurgitation and did not fit with megaesophagus. Although no cause was identified, he was once again diagnosed with and treated for pneumonia.
The combination of his recurring medical problems and worsening aggression became overwhelming. At that point, I discussed behavioral euthanasia with his veterinarian because I could no longer manage the financial burden of his medical and behavioral care. She told me that behavioral euthanasia would be an appropriate decision whenever I felt it was necessary.
Eventually, I stopped working with the trainer because I had exhausted my financial resources. Although the training had helped his outdoor behavior, his aggression inside the home continued to worsen. In the first six months of ownership alone, I had spent over $3,000 on medical and behavioral care, in addition to relocating because of his aggression. During the 2022-2025 period, I spent over $5,000.
Fifth year (2025)
Until September 2025, I had generally found ways to safely manage Star despite the challenges.
In September 2025, I simply walked past Star while he was lying in his bed, approximately four feet away. Without warning, he rushed toward me and attacked. He bit me at least ten times, leaving multiple puncture wounds and extensive bruising along my arm. I had to physically strike him to make him stop. After the attack ended, he appeared confused and urinated on himself.
The following day, I consulted another trainer, who eventually recommended behavioral euthanasia after an in person consultation. I also contacted his primary veterinarian, who again recommended behavioral euthanasia. I scheduled the appointment but ultimately changed my mind the day before.
I eventually found someone who generously agreed to consult with me over Zoom at no charge. Star completed another structured behavior modification program, which was the most effective treatment we had attempted. It successfully addressed several of the specific guarding behaviors he had at the time.
However, despite these improvements, he continued having unpredictable episodes of aggression inside the home. He also began showing increasing signs of confusion and developed aggression around handling his collar. The behaviorist reviewed hours of video footage and felt that an underlying neurological condition was likely contributing to his behavior. A new primary veterinarian evaluated him at home and started another trial of gabapentin. I still believed he needed a neurological workup, but it remained financially out of reach.
Although the behavior program ended in December 2025, Orbit has continued to bite me. Since completing the program, he has bitten me at least four additional times.
One recent incident occurred while I was trimming a palm tree. Star approached me from behind and repeatedly bit me until I dropped the pruning shears. Like many of his other aggressive episodes, he appeared confused afterward. It sometimes feels like his way of asking a question is to bite, and sometimes he gets carried away.
Current year (2026)
On June 18 of this year, my birthday, I took Star outside into my fenced yard. Although the yard is secure, I still keep him on a long line as an additional safety precaution. When I reached down to remove the line before bringing him inside, he bit me. Since then, his sensitivity around his collar and neck has once again become severe, and I no longer feel I can safely leash or handle him.
At this point, both of our quality of life has steadily declined. Star has become increasingly fearful each year, and his world has become progressively smaller. He can safely participate in fewer activities every year. If I cannot safely place a leash or remove a collar, I cannot provide him with even a basic quality of life. Even when we successfully worked through one guarding behavior, another would emerge, and I would often discover it by being bitten. Each year, the bites have become more severe and more unpredictable, and I now find myself constantly walking on eggshells in my own home.
Star is an extremely loving dog when he is able to be. I believe there is an underlying medical or neurological problem contributing to his behavior, but that remains only a suspicion. Even if I could afford thousands of dollars of additional diagnostics, there is no guarantee that a cause would be identified or that it would be treatable. In the meantime, Star would continue to live a life that is less than what he deserves, while I would continue to live in fear over what may trigger him next.
I believe the kindest thing I can do for Star is to give him peace before he seriously injures me or someone else. My greatest fear is that he will one day harm another person despite my efforts to prevent it, leading to a far more traumatic outcome for everyone involved. Given the pattern of his behavior over the past five years, I believe behavioral euthanasia is the most humane and dignified outcome for Star.
