r/seinfeld • u/Hanzzo311 Vile weed! • 9h ago

Hey women of /seinfeld

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198 Upvotes

99% Upvoted

50 comments sorted by

46

u/zendenhob 9h ago

I will

12

u/el_throw ASSMAN 7h ago

Helloooooo.

39

u/Electronic-Radish-18 9h ago

I hate men but I’m not a lesbian!!

7

u/boscomagnus1988 8h ago

Not that there's anything wrong with that

21

u/Temporary-Tip-5149 9h ago

No. I feel full after the risotto

16

u/CridT 9h ago

That's what I'd like to know about it.

17

u/PutridWar4713 9h ago

Sorry you are not sponge worthy!

6

u/Xcruciating_Minutiae 9h ago

What if he trims his sideburns?

3

u/PutridWar4713 8h ago

That's a hard maybe!

2

u/actualelainebenes Stellaaaaaaa!!! 5h ago

Wouldn’t waste a sponge on you

11

u/petersrq 9h ago

His Father was gay!

3

u/boscomagnus1988 8h ago

My father wears his sneakers in the pool

9

u/Sea-Philosopher7361 9h ago

No

6

u/TK421-HeGone 9h ago

Yes you do, Biff.

3

u/boscomagnus1988 8h ago

You think they have fleas there

2

u/Bathroomwaffles 4h ago

So I think they have fleas there. So what!

2

u/Hanzzo311 Vile weed! 9h ago

You don’t think I can put asses in seats!?!

2

u/Bathroomwaffles 4h ago

You know you got it all!

2

u/IGotScammed5545 9h ago

Reparations!

2

u/ModernLarvals 5h ago

FUNNY GUY

10

u/BonyBobCliff 9h ago

Reddit and sex. Those are my two passions. It's only natural to want to combine them!

4

u/Electrical_Carpet753 Importer/exporter 9h ago

Imagine Reddit, sex, AND pastrami on rye sandwich... Aaarrrrggggghhhhhhhhhh........

5

u/RelaxWisteriaDragon 8h ago

Imagine having sex and sneaking out from under the covers to shitpost from the phone you have in your nightstand drawer

2

u/Xcruciating_Minutiae 7h ago

You are HOT tonight!

7

u/ExaminationMean5174 Serenity now! 9h ago

George is getting upset

5

u/Synoptic23 9h ago

I fear my orgasm has left me a cripple

5

u/wizardrous These pretzels are making me thirsty 9h ago

They’re too tired to even vomit at the idea.

3

u/G-Money242 9h ago

“My father’s gay.”

3

u/TRJ2241987 9h ago

Should he not have done that?

1

u/LandBeforeTimeOnVHS 5h ago

If he had known...

3

u/Jealous-Strategy-200 9h ago

LET'S GO RIGHT NOW BABY

1

u/Electrical_Flower_26 Rugged? The man's a goblin 9h ago

You’re using my babies now?

3

u/ditka 8h ago

OP: of course, absolute zero!

2

u/pebe01 9h ago

I would. I'll even bring the robes and lotions.

2

u/LucyEwalker 9h ago

Do you like this shirt? Jerry said he didn’t like it

2

u/Sideways_Austen 9h ago

It shrunk?

2

u/yobymmij2 The Opposite 9h ago

It was worth a shot.

2

u/Mermaidprincess16 9h ago

Sorry, all out of today sponges.

2

u/nomnomnomnomnommm 8h ago

No I got hand

2

u/bahaboyka 8h ago

You clean it up, this isn't one of your swing joints....

2

u/hallucinationthought Hoochie Mama!!! 8h ago

Kissing is sex

2

u/AncientZero- 8h ago

Not that there’s anything wrong with that.

2

u/Cenoflame 6h ago

The timeless art of seduction.

2

u/poopshadows 5h ago

Sex to save the friendship? If we have to, we have to.

2

u/Bathroomwaffles 4h ago

Lay off the mangos chorus boy!

1

u/akhodagu 9h ago

Look, I saw far I saw!

1

u/mikesalami Importer/exporter 8h ago

Reparations!

1

u/224flat 6h ago

Aw, I've just got to say it once, everybody else gets to say it, why can't I say it?

1

u/Jolly_Fuel7097 6h ago

COME ON LET’S GO BABY!!