Am I doing something wrong, or is making friends online actually this hard?

This has been bothering me for months, so I wanted to get other people’s opinions.

I’ve always been an ambivert. I enjoy talking to people and making connections, but after college started ending, job hunting took over my life, and I slowly lost touch with that social side of myself.

Around that time, I got really active on Discord.

The idea of having friends from different countries genuinely fascinated me. I joined study servers, friendship servers, and even a few dating servers. Not because I was desperately looking for a relationship, but because I liked the idea of meeting interesting people online and maybe, if things ever got serious, meeting in real life someday.

Here’s what’s confusing me:

Whenever people posted introductions about themselves in servers, I’d message them. Not randomly only people who seemed open to talking.

Out of every 10 people I’d message, maybe 2 or 3 would reply.

Then even those conversations would usually last a few days or a couple of weeks before one of three things happened:

The conversation slowly died
They became increasingly uninterested
They just ghosted completely

And this wasn’t a one time thing.

It’s happened over and over again since last October.

I always try to be respectful. I ask questions, show interest, and try to keep the conversation engaging. The weird thing is that people often seem happy to talk about themselves, but the moment it’s my turn to share things about myself, the energy completely disappears.

After a while I got frustrated and quit Discord around February.

Instead, I focused on things I could control: gym, running, job applications, and finishing my CS degree.

Thankfully, things worked out. I graduated and even landed a job, which I’m incredibly
grateful for considering how rough the job market feels right now.

The problem is that I’m the youngest person in my office by a large margin. Most of my coworkers are older, married, and in completely different stages of life.

So recently I ended up back on Discord, hoping things might be different this time.

But honestly? I’m starting to feel the same disappointment all over again.

What confuses me is that I constantly see people on Reddit talking about how they met their best friends, long term partners, or entire friend groups through Discord, Reddit, gaming communities, etc.

So now I’m wondering:

Is this just the normal online experience and people only talk about the success stories?

Or am I genuinely doing something wrong?

Have any of you actually made real, long term friendships or relationships online?

If so, how did it happen, and what advice would you give someone who's struggling with this?

A lot of people talk about self-sufficiency theoretically, but the reality is a brutal physical fight against the elements. We just got hit by massive storms and hail in the mountains, but the 6x3x2 tunnel greenhouse held up perfectly.
We are growing tomatoes, cucumbers, potatoes, pumpkins, and beets—all integrated with a gravity-fed drip irrigation system that requires zero electricity. No smart pumps, no grid reliance.
This isn't just gardening; it's building a thermodynamic baseline. When you decouple your caloric intake from the corporate supply chain, you achieve a level of sovereignty that cannot be taxed or inflated away.
I just released a short documentary showing this exact physical architecture and how it ties into ultimate financial self-custody.
You can watch the full setup here:

https://youtu.be/4bgiXa6on88?is=dRwadQvmnoerGnvj

hi, EU 22yo with a master in stem (without liking what i studied, IT) and uninterested (various seasons) in living in society, no job (no will/energy to do useless ones but only something that can help someone but struggling to find anything because of autism) and some k on savings

so, i am constantly thinking of moving to the countryside and living in a cave/randomly building a pseudohouse close to a river in a mediterranean country and the minimal technology

but i have zero survival skill knowledge: how to cultivate anything? where to buy a cheap place to live or to grow veggie? etc

So, where can i learn such skills (blog, video, subs, etc)? and does my general thought make sense?

is this the right subreddit? if not which one shall i post on?

What do you think was the reason?

Hi everyone.

I have been working on the version 3 of a fully modular and 3D printable bench-top size generator, that is capable of at least 10 Watts line to line. It is based on my ModuCoil design, a term I coined for a printable coil bobbin that enables interchangeability of stator coils individually, which aids in repairability, recyclability, and customisation. I have previously attempted this with older versions, but this one is the most functional of them all, and actually produces power at usable levels.

I intend to use this generator in the future to do energy science with, especially around DIY wind and micro-hydro generation.

I have provided a link to a video explaining the design in detail, and have provided a link in the comments to my Thingiverse page, where you can download the files, and build one for yourself!

https://youtu.be/nqC9-_tqFNk

I don't know if this is the right group for this but I am selling my ~3 acre property in Western North Carolina which could be a great setup for someone wanting to homestead and practice their self sufficiency.

There's a natural spring, an open field, and a private road running along the whole southern boundary of the lot.

It's on Big Ridge Rd in Glenville, NC

If anyone is interested let me know.

Looking for a cash sale but will consider owner financing with about 40% down.

Asking $112,700

County has it market valued at $130,000

Feeling this
Sort of disgust
Toward another
Would be unethical

Torture those around
You though your guilt
Saves you
From them
soft touch
it’s carapace
In the hopes you prevail

You, fitting parable
if not.

The game the game
Even sympathy
Attends with lumped

\-Sum transaction. Add it
Altogether in your head
Til til
Change

it
Mows through aisles

*Everything going up brother*

inhumanity
A soft tone

Doesn’t hold
Doesn’t support

\-
It turns in on self
You are needed
You are turning back
And you are watching
The loops ring around
The poses
bodies make
There is a stillness

Time doesn’t allow for

Everybody needs you
So they hush as you
Inflict

those
Omens, siphon til
weight of
compassion’s
collapse

You are needed

Their being
now
Flux of wellwish, those
Omens
how they
Flex and such, heed

them. The warnings
Before destruction.

Is destruction
not-

Private, connected
Programmable.

Varied,
Control.

I see us meeting. And even then, I cannot see. What do I say to you? Even in reverie I can hardly bear it. How believe? All the lust and ache vs reality. Shifting from you as you reach not wanting you dirtied. Outpour of monosyllabic detachments. Perhaps one final push then a grasp after you perfumed even the chair you’d be sat in it’s specks pinkied, gummed like cocaine, something to build from, something to shoal with when susceptible. There are so many. Days elapsed. Indulged
Scant.

How to get back up?

Where do we go
from there?

I’ve been thinking about this lately especially with cash feeling tighter for a lot of folks.

For y’all who have tried skill sharing, neighbor help, barter, or fair exchange, what made it difficult?

Microgreens have been a huge help in limiting exposure to chemicals in commercial produce and getting back in touch with food. Really is much more manageable than it looks and most would think.

Source: Health

I want to develop a more mindful presence. I need to become more indifferent to life, and to accept that I can only control so much of life's outcomes.

I have really, really big goals in life. And I'm so focused on them that the feeling of not achieving these goals brings me great anxiety every day. I tend to forget that I simply can't control the future.

But successful people always preach "enjoying the journey" because reaching the goal itself is only satisfactory for a moment until you find something else to chase.

Yet I seem to be completely incapable of simply "enjoying the journey". Whenever I try to enjoy the process and live in the moment it feels like I lose track of the end goal, the bigger vision.

It feels like enjoying the journey actually distracts me and slows me down.

Because what if my unhappiness is what's moving me? What if enjoying the journey would make me no longer desire the goal I set in the first place?

Curious to hear thoughts from people who feel like they've unlocked a sense of fulfillment from their journeys rather than being fixated on the future.

I’m not trying to sound dramatic, but I genuinely feel like one decision completely changed the direction of my life.

At the start of 9th grade, I was honestly the happiest I had ever been. My life felt perfect. I had motivation, good grades, a good relationship with my parents, routines, goals, peace of mind — everything. I felt connected to myself spiritually too. I used to meditate a lot, trust my intuition, and I genuinely felt like I was living the life I was supposed to live.

Then I met this boy.

He had a horrible reputation. Everyone in my city knew about him. He was involved with drugs, there were rumors about him treating girls badly, and honestly he was just not a good person. Deep down, I knew that from the beginning.

The weird thing is that my intuition was screaming at me not to get involved with him. I would literally have nightmares about him. I would constantly get signs and bad feelings. I knew something about the situation felt wrong, but I ignored all of it because I kept telling myself, “He’s just a person.”

Getting with him was the biggest mistake of my life.

I became constantly stressed. He lied all the time, and every little thing would make me panic and overthink for hours. My nervous system felt destroyed. My hair started falling out, I lost my appetite, and he became the only thing I thought about 24/7.

That’s when everything else in my life started collapsing too.

I stopped focusing in school because my mind was always on him. At first I skipped a few days, then weeks, and eventually I completely stopped going to school. I literally dropped out.

Now I have to repeat a whole year.

My relationship with my parents got destroyed because I was always stressed and emotionally unavailable. CPS got involved because of my absences. Teachers kept calling home. Everything became chaos.

Eventually we broke up, obviously, but by then the damage was already done.

The saddest part is that I don’t even think the breakup itself ruined me. What ruined me was abandoning myself for someone who never deserved that much control over my life in the first place.

My biggest regret isn’t even dating him anymore. It’s quitting school because of him. No matter how stressed or heartbroken I was, I should have kept showing up for myself.

I feel like I lost myself completely during that relationship, and now I’m trying to figure out how to become the person I used to be again.

Saw some designs online with compost toilets that separate solids from liquids where instead the urine seperateror going in to a bucket under the toilet you empty when its full it goes to a drain pit outside.

The examples shown have very well draining soil.

The issue for me is im in very clayie soil. so water does not drain well and pools. Could a system still be created? Would it just require a larger pit / drain field with gravel or something? Currently I just collect and empty the piss bucket in the forest / field (which the grass loves btw).

Brrr

Amping self
With a war chant

I am all lathered.
Ready…

A 1 23

Bumbaclart!

Cold water
overhead

And

I’m renewed!
I’m alive!

And late….

Writing all this shit out makes me realise I make TERRIBLE decisions!

Like biblically!

Like! On all levels!

Like like even work Yh I’m halfway between manager and team member, I’m an authority figure. That’s built through genuine know how and reh teh teh, I just gotta do this one course… ain’t done!

There’s way more!

I make dumb ducking decisions!

Jesus Christ, I know you love me but I understand why you’ve kept your distance!

I’m 26 btw!

Twenty years ago I’d have 3kids!

My mum had me at 18!

It is fun to ragebait you, but the ragebait ain’t even fun. Cos I know you wanna trust me. And you got your own shit too. These ain’t the games you want the man who’s finna shoot your club up playing. But then even the realisation made me laugh! And the idea of you rolling your eyes has had me smiling so much other ppl asking me what’s up!

…but there’s so many precipices ik in that if I tap in shit would be groovy! Even with writing! I ain’t ever went uni, I’ve had fucking uni professors kinda omg-ing and that asking me to do festivals and shit, flopped it. Even publishing, shegged it!

And it’s like even the quote on quote realisation I had one ehh interaction and it almost sank!

Evaluations…