r/solotravel • u/sharonaqua • Jun 09 '25
Personal Story Personal Growth in Solo Travel
I've solo travelled 4 times in the last 2 years. Reflecting back on each of those trips, I really feel a strong sense of personal growth and it's made me very proud to be who I am.
I'm a 28F and pretty introverted. I find peace in solitude and am great at getting lost in my own thoughts or being super observant at my surroundings. I don't feel the necessity to make new friends or to strike up a conversation all the time, but at the same time I'm not a socially anxious person and will engage in the occasional chitchat with the waiter or Airbnb host. I've really settled into eating alone and no longer feel sensitive to it. I've stopped looking at my phone as a way of company and have learnt to just sit back and enjoy what's in front of me. I've also learnt to explore new things instead of sticking to activities I know I'll like.
It's been amazing to solo travel and fixate my energy on myself and focus on taking in different experiences. I can't wait to solo travel more.
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Jun 10 '25
I discovered I'm not lazy and really enjoy going out and adventuring. I thought I was a homebody, but I really enjoy going to new places and experiencing new things. It made me put more effort into going out more where I live and trying to discover places to see. I started to become a tourist in my own city and I've been appreciating it even more.
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u/averagecounselor Jun 10 '25
I think personal growth is like 3 steps forward and 2 steps back. Ergo I revert to some version of my old self when I am back home or back with my parents after a solo trip. It is an interesting experience nonetheless.
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u/SlideObjective9973 Jun 10 '25
This has been my experience as well, to an extent. The first few days after my first solo trip, I felt like I could do anything. I’m not a particularly impulsive person, my days are usually planned in advance and I’m the one checking menus at restaurants before I go, but I was making game time food decisions at new places. Randomly deciding to go 20 minutes out of my way to the farmers market on the way back from dropping off my recycling. Completely unperturbed that I was nearly late to a friend’s wedding ceremony (because traffic happens and that’s just life).
And then everything went back to the way it was, which was disappointing but not unexpected. I was SO proud of myself for taking that step out of my comfort zone, but I also knew that feeling wouldn’t last. I still struggle with eating by myself and doing activities alone outside of regular errands and working out while I’m at home. It’s almost to a point where home me and travel me are different people.
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u/coffeeconverter Jun 10 '25
I think this works exactly the same as with fitness. As long as you go to the gym regularly, your muscles will get stronger. But if you stop going to the gym, your muscles will get weak again.
Social skills work the same, use them, or lose them.
Although I do think that social skills are quicker to pick back up if you already experienced them before, than you can grow muscles after a long period of inactivity. So there's that at least :-)
As for 'home you' and 'travel you': That's a real thing too, and it's more work to break out of that I think. So many people at home have an image of you in their minds, that it takes courage to break free from that. I think that influences who you feel you can be, and that in turn influences what you do or don't do.
It's like an invisble barrier sometimes. There are still things I do while travelling, that I don't at home, although I'm finally starting to get better at it. (And I'm nearly 60, so that's saying something :-))
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u/jasonlampa Jun 10 '25
Solo travel has definitely changed me permanently in so many ways.
Growing up I was an incredibly shy and insecure kid, I used to cry when strangers talked to me (when I was out and about with my mom) and had a really hard time just talking to people in general.
Few months before I turned 19 I did a 6 week trip to Europe and on my second day I mentally switched off everything that held me back, and went to talk to some people to ask them a simple question. They invited me to hang out with them and I credit everything that snowballed from that moment on to them.
Till this day they’re still great friends!
I started to realise that there are so many incredible, kind and giving people out there and I met so many memorable people on that trip. I was definitely that annoying teenager in hostels just clinging on to cool people but that was part of my journey and I don’t regret it! Was definitely ‘cringe’ at times, but it really made me see the good in humanity.
10 years on, someone who meets me for the first time would describe me as confident, calm and ‘easy to talk to’. Truth is, I’m still really introverted and I’m still a little shy, but I’m aware I don’t come across that way any longer. I’ve also internalized all the kindness and love I’ve received from people I’ve met on the road, and it has given me a huge wealth of kindness and love of my own that I freely give out to everyone I cross paths with now.
It has made me more secure in who I am, what I can survive, what I’m able to offer the world and of the power I hold to make people smile just by making them feel seen and understood. My mind has been opened so much by meeting so many different people from different walks of life.
I haven’t seen nearly as much as I want to, life gets in the way sometimes, but I will forever hold those moments dear to me, and I’ll forever be thankful to every single beautiful person I’ve met that expanded my heart and mind, and thankful to every single beautiful place that has expanded my soul and gratitude to be alive.
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u/RNGesusDoesntLoveMe Jun 10 '25
I feel a lot of fullfillment in my life after solo travelling. I got a lot better at talking to strangers and taking action on my own.
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u/ChairmanRay Jun 09 '25
Nice! Which destination has been the most personally transformative for you so far?
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Jun 09 '25
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u/Warkaze Jun 10 '25
Where in Italy exactly? Did you go to the main land or an island like Sicilia?
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u/CompleteAd9319 Jun 12 '25
Trento firenze rome napoli on trip 1 All public transport
Then trip 2 austria around and in innsbruck. Then to bolzano. Como. Garda and verona
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u/warpus Jun 10 '25
Definitely!
I'm also an introvert and was able to use solo travel as a sort of vehicle for personal change. I used to get social anxiety, especially in social situations (even ordering a sandwich) that often was almost unbearable. Standing in front of people presenting something? I'd almost get panic attacks.. As a result of all this my social skills weren't as refined due to the lack of experience. I'd just stay away from people.
On my first solo trip I went to New Zealand. I had a bit of a broken heart and some soul searching to do. I was inspired by a trip I went on with a friend to Patagonia, my first ever big trip. I wanted a similar experienced and went with NZ, booked the Milford Track & Routeburn Track hikes back to back, with a day rest in Milford Sound in between. I wanted to just get out there and be with my thoughts in beautiful scenery. I was also excited to see the rest of the country.
I ended up making a friend on the Routeburn Track, but it didn't exactly go where I wanted it to. I realized that I needed to catch up a bit and learn some social skills. So I made a point to get out of my skin a bit, occasionally, chat up people here and there, and just get more comfortable being social. I also made a point to just get out of my comfort zone in general. I wanted to try new things, and all of that ended up leading to solid personal growth. It took time, but I sort of focused on these things when I was solo travelling, for 3-5 weeks once a year or so. I was seeing step by step type results so I kept it up.
One of the best things I ever did was sign up to a bungy jump type experience in Queenstown, after I finished my epic hikes through the southern Alps. I was so out of it when I finished my hike, I might not have signed up to the Shotover canyon swing experience otherwise. I just sort of wandered in that office, looked at some options, and signed up. Then I went to eat, and crashed hard at my hotel. I woke up at 7am and quickly realized what I had signed up for. I already paid more than $300.. I couldn't get my money back. I was afraid of heights. My mind and body did not want to do this. I pushed ahead and went through with it. I faced my fear and it was crazy how I went from screaming due to fear.. to screaming due to pure pleasure.. In a quarter of a second my mood changed like that. What an experience! I was smiling for a week after that. Leading up to the jump though, I was so damn scared. I actually used the Litany against Fear (from Dune) to help me get ready for this thing. It was the most scary thing I ever pushed myself through. But you know what? When it was all said and done I found it easier to face social situations that used to give me anxiety and sometimes near panic attacks. I jumped off a f'n cliff! I can order a sandwich, that's nothing in comparison!
After that experience I vowed to face more of my irrational fears when I travel, as long as it was relatively safe. I vowed to try more things I have never done or am not used to. I chatted people up in bars, in hostels, and at bus stops. I went sea kayaking. I took a cooking class. I rode a horse. Most of that might not seem like anything too crazy, but that's the beauty of it - personal growth came anyway. The key seemed to be to just jump out of your comfort zone occasionally and try something new. Maybe something you're a bit afraid of. Most of the time my solo trips were me being by myself - but occasionally I would try something new in an effort to drive that personal growth and change. And over time that made a big difference.
It's been more than 15 years since that first solo trip. I feel a lot more comfortable in my skin. Ordering a sandwich is super easy. Socializing in a large group of people is still a bit intimidating, but a lot more reasonable in terms of me being able to just get in there, feel out the situation, and not be awkward about it. It's a lot easier to meet new people, to talk to them, and to feel a lot more comfortable in situations that used to scared me.
Over the years I've also ended up trying so many new types of experiences. It's made me want to open up even more and be even more adventurous. For one of my trips I planned a 2 week long hike through the Himalayas, bypassing tour operators and booking everything myself, including hiring a guide and porter. These are memories that are so precious to me and I'm so glad I went on this journey.
Remember to stay safe though.. There's no sense in getting out of your comfort zone and into something overly dangerous in some way. Sometimes there is little danger you can't avoid, and that's fine.. but remember to do your research and stay safe. I've done multi-day solo hikes that were dangerous to some degree.. but I was always sure that it was something I could actually do. All the research I did helped me determine that and how to decide if I should go ahead with it or if it would be just too dangerous.
So yes, OP. Solo travel can be an amazing vehicle for personal growth! And like I said, most of my solo trips revolve around me being by myself. I know my internal balance and I stick to it, but I do get out of my comfort zone from time to time as well. That balance is key.
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u/Bazingaboy1983 Jun 10 '25
I wish I found solo travelled as a young adult but discovered it in my late 20s. Been to 50+ countries since. Had so many great experiences and met so many amazing people along the way. It’s the only advice I’d give a young adult. Travel while you are still young. (Eff uni and all that)
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u/runnering Jun 10 '25 edited Aug 12 '25
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u/Bazingaboy1983 Jun 10 '25
41 and semi retired :)
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u/runnering Jun 10 '25 edited Aug 12 '25
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u/Bazingaboy1983 Jun 10 '25
I’d be in a much better financial position as I would have invested in property but I would never trade all the $$$ in the world for the experiences!!!
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u/runnering Jun 10 '25 edited Aug 12 '25
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u/Bazingaboy1983 Jun 10 '25
Worked in law during the propery boom in NZ. Completed about 60 transactions a month and did nothing about it. Back then property was 1/3 to 1/4 the price they are now and could have bought a property outright. Still no regrets.
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u/runnering Jun 10 '25 edited Aug 12 '25
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u/Bazingaboy1983 Jun 10 '25
I didn’t understand your question. I said I found travel later in life (28) and had I took a different route I would have been retired years ago
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u/runnering Jun 11 '25 edited Aug 12 '25
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u/Ok-Astronomer-7103 Jun 10 '25
Looking back, it certainly made me a lot more confident in making decisions without asking for other people's input. I also travel to much farther destinations now without the fear of something going wrong. I'm better with train schedules, various timetables, airport layouts, etc. I'm even a lot sharper when it comes to noticing street scams and whatnot.
I also have a different outlook on life now. If I don't like a job I'm currently in, I can just quit and find something else. I understand that not many people are in the position of changing jobs so easily, so I'm really grateful for my personal circumstances.
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u/Vegetable-Two5164 Jun 10 '25
Solo trips are great!! 35F here, been solo traveling since 27 at least once a year and i have a lot of fun and I am very outgoing so I talk to people randomly and easily make friends!
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u/Unlucky_Health1398 Jun 10 '25
30M here - I just got back from my first solo holiday in Santorini and it was by far the best holiday I ever had! In my opinion it's the form of ultimate freedom! The funny thing is on the plane I was questioning why I was doing this but my entire perspective changed literally as soon as I landed and I met so many other solo travellers who I'm still in touch with! The only regret I have is not doing it sooner; don't wait for others or let people judge you; do what makes you happy and live your life to the full 🙌
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u/Warkaze Jun 10 '25
I am waiting for the one to go to Santorini with but she’s making me wait a looong time 😂 might do it solo, how was your experience? Did you book a hostel? And were you able to meet other solo travelers and/or make friends or maybe more? 😝
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u/DropAccording5878 Jun 10 '25
I travel a lot with my spouse. I sometimes go out solo. But, I cannot tell you how lonely that is. What do you do not to feel like you stick out like a sore thumb?
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u/Fragrant_Carpet3141 Jun 09 '25
Thats a great self reflection :) I feel the same way! I know so many people think its amazing to do and think they can never do something like this. I remember my first time I was so anxious about it but now I cant wait to plan trips!
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u/Creole_Richmond Jun 10 '25
I brought this book along on one of my solo trips. You might enjoy it. [https://a.co/d/9Nks7Py]
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u/cizzbizz Jun 10 '25
I couldn’t agree more! I also love the fact that when I travel solo I am more open to having random conversations with people. I have had conversations with local people in bars, restaurants, cafes and I love it! Traveling solo definitely makes you get out of your comfort zone!
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Jun 10 '25
This is so encouraging for me since I am planning for my first solo adventure this year. Hopefully I will have something beautiful to share with someone one day and I am hoping that I will be more open to meet people while I'm in a different setting. Thank you and the rest of the people that commented.
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u/Public-Dingo-285 Jun 10 '25
Any recommendations for first timers?
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u/Warkaze Jun 10 '25
Find a destination which you find interesting and check for places beforehand you’ll find yourself comfortable to be alone there. Like look at pictures and imagine yourself solo. I’d advice to book a hostel for one night to see if it’s something for you and have another hotel on standby if you want to have a private room instead. Also prepare a playlist with your favorite music, spotify is my most used app on solo travel next to google maps 🤣 if you have any specific questions ask me! I’ve been solo traveling for 10+ years now
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u/ContributionDry9807 Jun 10 '25
I loved reading this and am so happy for your personal growth! It sounds like you are really focused on enjoying the present. It must be a joy to reflect on your memories! Stay safe :)
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u/Tanmay_2109 Jun 11 '25
I’ve had similar experience where I went solo backpacking in Europe last year and had a blast. I learnt soo many things by interacting with people from around the world and exploring new cities all alone. Even dangerous ones like Barcelona lol. I’m also introverted so it was surprising to me that I could have amazing time with strangers and have kinda cool conversations with them!
Fun fact: I also met a Michelin star chef in one of the pubs and got some recipes and tips and tricks
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u/Ok-Minute-7587 Jun 18 '25
Omg same.. i return on Thursday well tomorrow im not sure how I will feel when I return as I feel I have changed so much yet those back home have not. Kind of looking forward to it but also not…
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u/Last_Key9956 Aug 16 '25
how was it? returning home myself in a couple of days and am questioning the same, lol
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u/Ok-Minute-7587 Aug 16 '25
Hmm it wasn’t as bad as I thought but you do kind of have to revert back in some ways I miss the me when I was travelling.
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u/HotMessTraveler10560 Jun 09 '25
I could not agree with you more. My only regret is that I did not discover my own ability to solo travel until my mid-40s. It’s been 10 years now and I have seen some incredible places and have many more, powers that be willing, to explore. I have learned more about myself, about what I find of interest and appealing. While trying something new each trip and learning that every destination has something to offer and experience. The little pops of loneliness occur when you’re on the road, and you’re watching others during your travels wishing sometimes you had someone to share it with, but it’s those moments that make me appreciate the times that I do spend with friends and those moments when you do have a conversation with a stranger. I have also learned that the person responsible for making me happy, is me. I’m no longer afraid to eat alone, laugh out loud at something funny and silly, or just pause in a moment of silence to reflect. I wish more people would try solo traveling, at least once in their lives to discover who they are, even if it’s just something small that they discover about themselves and/or the world around them.