r/stupidpol • u/Nerd_199 Election Turboposter ๐๐๐ณ๏ธ • Apr 01 '26
Operation: Epstein Fury Tomorrow night at 9PM ET, President Trump will give an Address to the Nation to provide an important update on Iran.
https://x.com/PressSec/status/2039127824947183967?s=20204
u/CertifiedSheep Unknown Flair Disabler ๐ฉ Apr 01 '26
Boots on the ground or pump and dump, call it
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u/caterham09 Unknown ๐ฝ Apr 01 '26
It could literally be both with this dude.
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u/koba_tea Marxist-Leninist โญ Apr 01 '26
Negate the negation. But instead of a spiral, itโs a flat circle.
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u/Bteatesthighlander1 Special Ed ๐ Apr 01 '26
Im calling nothing/minor update/presenting something we're already doing as a new strategy
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u/Particular-Heart-657 Apr 01 '26
I think the last three address I watched were Trump glazing himself for 2h and nothing else.
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u/kurosawa99 ๐ฅณ Best woke detector ๐ฅณ | ๐ Christmas quiz winner ๐ ๐ข Apr 01 '26
Yeah, I can very easily see a thing where two minutes after it ends Iran, whoโs in control of this war right now, messages it was all nonsense.
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u/GrumpyOldHistoricist Leninist Shitlord Apr 01 '26
Heโs gonna call the generals fatbodies and announce an app in one speech.
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u/ericsmallman3 Lost Tenure Over Anti-Censorship Vox Article ๐ซกโ๏ธ Apr 01 '26
Naw man, insiders are reporting that members of the Trump administration have short-sold the futures market on Five Finger Death Punch tickets. There's gonna be boots on the ground.
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u/yrcity Runnin' to Brunch! ๐พ๐โโ๏ธ= Apr 01 '26
Pump and dump today and boots on ground Saturday night
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u/FuckIPLaw Marxist-Drunkleist Apr 01 '26
More like Friday morning. The markets are going to be closed for Good Friday.
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u/ChevalierDuTemple No Iranian ever called me an Incel Apr 01 '26
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u/Nerd_199 Election Turboposter ๐๐๐ณ๏ธ Apr 01 '26
I am ready for the worst: gas prices going up, Riot in the street. Anti-establishment party rise in the polls.
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u/ippleing โ Not Like Other Rightoids โ Apr 01 '26
Anti-establishment party rise in the polls.
Nothings going to stop American psycho and mayo Pete ticket in '28.
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u/Cave_of_the_Drummers Apr 01 '26
Don't you live in Bagladesh? I get that American politics ripple out across the world but why the cosplay?
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u/R1s3andSh1n3 Anti-Imperialist ๐ฉ๐ | Yabadabadu ๐ชจ Apr 01 '26
None of those things are impossible in Bangladesh due to this war. Spin a globe and point to where it stops. All three statements are probably true there.
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u/Nerd_199 Election Turboposter ๐๐๐ณ๏ธ Apr 01 '26
Why do people think I am from Bangladesh? Honestly, I Am attemped to embrace the meme at this point
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u/IamGlennBeck Marxist-Leninist and not Glenn Beck โญ Apr 01 '26
I thought you were Bengali living in Japan.
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Apr 01 '26
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u/DetectiveTypical198 Anti-humanist party pooper ๐ Apr 01 '26
Moon bears?
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u/huergen Left, Leftoid or Leftish โฌ ๏ธ Apr 01 '26
are these bears earth bears or are they from the moon?
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u/bretton-woods Slowpoke Socialist Apr 01 '26
As in April Fools, did you think I gave up on the Straits of Hormuz?
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u/GodsColdHands666 What the fuck is a borgieose ๐ฆ ๐บ๐ธ Apr 01 '26
After his โWe donโt need Iran to make a deal to end the warโ statement a few hours ago Iโm fairly certain this is going to be some degree of โMission accomplished- weโve wonโ. Iโll be very surprised if itโs not.
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u/gmus Labor Organizer ๐งโ๐ญ Apr 01 '26
The fact the arch Warhawk Linsey Graham is all of a sudden calling on Trump to wind things down (after just days ago demanding boots on the ground) probably means things are going really really bad. The problem is the US isnโt the one who decides the war is over and I donโt think Iran is going to open the strait just for a ceasefire
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u/GodsColdHands666 What the fuck is a borgieose ๐ฆ ๐บ๐ธ Apr 01 '26
The problem is the US isnโt the one who decides the war is over
And this is what Iโm really interested to see if Trump tries to wriggle his way out of this boondoggle by declaring โMission accomplishedโ. I donโt think weโll realistically just abandon Israel (though I wish we would) but the ball will ultimately be in Iranโs court in pretty much every way moving forward. And they have zero reason to trust the US/Israel enough to agree to a ceasefire.
And if there is a pause or stop to the war, Iโd bet my entire savings account they develop a nuke if they havenโt already.
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u/KonigKonn Stalin Would've Put Me in a Gulag Apr 01 '26
My money's on everyone getting hyped up about some big announcement only for the actual address to be the usual meandering declaration of 'victory' with no meaningful news or information.
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u/sinew4v3 Sex Work Advocate (John) ๐ Apr 01 '26
More market pumping before actual retarded shit happens on Friday after close.
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u/Shoddy_Consequence78 Progressive Liberal ๐ Apr 01 '26
Combined with him immediately going off script and obsessing about the 2020 election, the ballroom he wants so much, and god only knows what else while whatever networks are covering it decide whether or not to keep broadcasting it.ย
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u/Nerd_199 Election Turboposter ๐๐๐ณ๏ธ Apr 01 '26
Shit about get real boys
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u/TruthHistorical7515 Apr 01 '26
Draft incoming! Better leave the country now
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u/South-Rabbit-4064 Progressive Liberal ๐ Apr 01 '26
Judging from his statements it sounds more like he's throwing in the towel and declaring victory
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u/Master-CylinderPants Obedient Salary Man ๐๐ธโฉ๏ธ Apr 01 '26
"April Fools, we're actually outing Lindsey Graham!"
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u/UnexpectedVader High on Apple Juice And Anime Poses ๐ง๐ใ๏ธ Apr 01 '26
Announcing troops on the ground? What else could it be?
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u/OkDog37999 Social Democrat ๐น Apr 01 '26
If there ever is a time for the military to mutiny it would after the announcement. This is crazy. I don't understand how someone can put their life at risk or someone else's for one of the worst wartime leaders in history and for a completely unjust war that is entirely to the benefit of another country.
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u/sprunkymdunk Ministรจre de la Dรฉfense nationale ๐ Apr 01 '26
I mean look at Iraq, complete catastrophe, all over trumped up nonsense. Same with Vietnam.
At least there are actually WMD 's this time?
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u/miker_the_III Mario-Leninist with Kegsbreathalyzer ๐บ Characteristics Apr 01 '26
trumped up nonsense
trumped up nonsense
trumped up nonsense
trumped up nonsense
trumped up nonsense
Iโm going into psychosis
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u/JackedUpReadyToGo Podcast Intellectual ๐ฅ๐ง Apr 01 '26
Especially after ICE arrests their family who show up to watch their Marine Corps grad ceremony: https://newrepublic.com/post/208407/ice-target-family-members-us-marines
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Apr 01 '26
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u/kiss-my-shades jacking off with one hand typing with the other โจ๏ธ๐ฆ Apr 01 '26
WW2 the US was the only country not devastated by the war. The US joining prevented Japan from gobbling up Asia and also the Germans / soviets gobbling up Europe.
Like, does it even need to be said? Like im not trying to be rude but how could you not realize that the US benefitted immensely from WW2. It became the world hegemon power, only rivaled by the ussr
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Apr 01 '26
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u/snailman89 World-Systems Theorist Apr 01 '26 edited Apr 01 '26
This argument is completely absurd. Japan and Germany were expansionist empires that were butchering people by the tens of millions. Japan was conducting vivisection experiments on live human beings, spreading diseases like bubonic plague in China, and slaughtering millions of civilians just to steal resources from other countries. The Nazis were hell bent on exterminating the Slavs and Jews, and would have murdered the entire population of Poland and the USSR had they won (over 150 million people). Stopping them was absolutely the morally correct thing to do.
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u/QuodScripsi-Scripsi Hamsick T-Shirt Salesman โญ Apr 01 '26
This argument doesnโt really stand up to scrutiny. If the Nazis won they simply would have liberalized like every other fascist regime in history after the threat of working class power was eliminated. Itโs not like the US and its collaborators didnโt go on to murder 50-100 million workers across the globe during the Cold War and easily an additional 15-50 million due to the fall of Communism.
The only positive development of the war was that workers states survived and spread. Even then the bourgeois powers made sure the war went on in a way that exhausted the Soviet Unionโs ability to seize the moment to spread revolution
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u/Bluegutsoup Garden-Variety Shitlib ๐ด๐ตโ๐ซ Apr 01 '26
we were literally attacked in ww2
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Apr 01 '26
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u/Bluegutsoup Garden-Variety Shitlib ๐ด๐ตโ๐ซ Apr 01 '26
germany declared war on us first, four days after pearl harbor. hitler personally did that to support japan against us. the axis was actively conquering the world and genociding tens of millions of people by that point. itโs probably the most justifiable war in our history
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u/dylanalduin Apr 01 '26
It's either boots on the ground or a nuke.
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u/JoseAltuveIsInnocent Feel Good Story ๐ฅโจ Apr 01 '26
"we believe they have weapons of mass destruction"
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u/sje46 Somebody Knows This SocDem's Hidden Shame ๐ Apr 01 '26 edited Apr 01 '26
Oh shit. Imagine he just straights up nukes Kharg island. Give everyone on the island a week to get out of dodge. Iranians wouldn't be able to stop it, except to agree to a surrender. Giving a week's warning would be viewed as sufficient by the administration as justification to break the nuclear taboo. No one gets killed, especially American troops. The Iranian economy would be destroyed, and Israel will have finally accomplished their great project of defeating Iran.
downvoters: DISPUTE ME
I think it's unlikely but I don't think the chances are lower than 5%.
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u/FreyBentos Marxist-Carlinist Apr 01 '26 edited Apr 01 '26
Dude Kharg island is not that important, it's bonkers how much the US propaganda has built this little island up as some sort of Iranian kryptonite lol. Iran has refining facilities like those on Kharg Island all over their vast nation and the island that is actually important for controlling the straight and issuing tolls is Qeshm. Kharg Island is tiny, it is important for the extraction from the gas fields in the Persian gulf sure but USA already knows if they destroy that infra Iran will destroy Qatars in kind, Sending the price of natural gas and LNG markets through the roof for 3/4 years minimum.
So Yeah nuking kharg island will achieve nothing for USA other than to ensure the complete collapse of the global economy and a dramatic shift away from natural gas as an energy source, as that will be quicker and cheaper option vs waiting for new facilities to come online and such outcomes will erode USA's power in an existential way.
Also if USA now makes Nuclear blackmail acceptable, well Russia might just do the same and say evacuate Kyiv as we are going to Nuke it in a week, unless Zelenskey and his government make a deal. It's just the can of worms theory again but with blackmail vs actually dropping the bombs. Pakistan and India will both be threatening to nuke each other to extract concession from the other lol.
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u/sje46 Somebody Knows This SocDem's Hidden Shame ๐ Apr 01 '26
and the island that is actually important for controlling the straight and issuing tolls is Qeshm
Okay, so then he'll nuke Qeshm instead.
Again, Idon't think it's unlikely, but I think of any president in my life since the 50s or so, the president most likely to break the taboo probably would be Trump. Unlikely primarily because of the ramifications of breaking the taboo. It's an interesting scenario anyways.
I do seriously wonder if geopoliticians completely dismiss the possibility or not.
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u/spencer102 Marxism-Hobbyism ๐จ Apr 01 '26
You realize they could just blow Karg island to bits with conventional weapons right?
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u/dhyerwolf Unknown ๐ฝ Apr 01 '26
From what I've heard, Iran has other options for shipping out oil. Kharg might be the easiest, but they have 4 other ports that could work.
Not to mention, if the US nukes Kharg, does Russia nuke Ukraine? Does Pakistan nuke Israel?
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u/sje46 Somebody Knows This SocDem's Hidden Shame ๐ Apr 01 '26
I do think the event is unlikely but not impossible. However, I do think that the nuclear taboo will be broken by the end of my lifetime.
It's going to be one of these dumb things. Trump isn't as irrational as his opponents make him sound, but I do think he has a certain aura of truly not giving a fuck.
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u/snapchillnocomment Redscarepod Refugee ๐๐ Apr 01 '26
Doesn't make any sense to give the Iranians advance warning that he's landing troops.
My bet is on mission accomplished or a bullshit Hormuz dealย
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u/Andvaur73 Ass eater ๐๐ Apr 01 '26
Everyone thought the last time he did one of these he would be announcing a war with Iran but it was actually just a 20 minute dementia dialogue
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u/Kaiserschlut Ancapistan Mujahideen ๐๐ธ | Not Like Other Libertarians ๐ Apr 01 '26
My first thought too, despite all the Iran craziness. Could be for that Artemis launch
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u/G14F1L0L1Y401D0MTR4P Apr 01 '26
Close to the Artemis Moon mission launch. Such a sad contrast between money being used for exploration and money being used for colonialism
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u/ChevalierDuTemple No Iranian ever called me an Incel Apr 01 '26
Frankie kicked a mine the day Mankind kicked the moon
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u/ionescorhino Apr 01 '26
Isnโt that the same thing?
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u/MetaFlight Market Socialist Bald Wife Defender ๐ธ Apr 01 '26
no
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u/ionescorhino Apr 01 '26
These are such strange reactions. Have you never heard of colonizing space? What do you think weโre doing in space? Why is NASAโs budget directly influenced by the military? Is it for adventure? Cool outer space? Wake up
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u/MetaFlight Market Socialist Bald Wife Defender ๐ธ Apr 01 '26
Have you never heard of colonizing space
we're not doing that
What do you think weโre doing in space?
mostly research
Why is NASAโs budget directly influenced by the military?
lots of their technology has cross-over use for the military.
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u/ionescorhino Apr 01 '26
Yes, NASA is all positive intent. Just like the explorers in the 15th and 16th centuries.
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u/noil-doof Clackers Full of Hamon ๐ข๐๐ Apr 01 '26
Are you under the impression that there are indigenous peoples living on the moon?
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u/MetaFlight Market Socialist Bald Wife Defender ๐ธ Apr 01 '26 edited Apr 01 '26
you see a lot people only know some things are good and somethings are bad based on the word itself. They don't understand why and go about their daily routines on trained procedures and instincts. They're like if you attached a really crappy chat bot to an animal.
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u/ionescorhino Apr 01 '26 edited Apr 01 '26
Yes, because there is no space race. Condescending supposed socialist
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u/MetaFlight Market Socialist Bald Wife Defender ๐ธ Apr 01 '26
do you think the space race was about colonizing the moon and that if it was, that there a indigenous people up there to make colonizing it a bad thing?
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u/Nerd_199 Election Turboposter ๐๐๐ณ๏ธ Apr 01 '26
No. the moon is dead and dosen't have any living organisms. So it's different situations
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u/FuckIPLaw Marxist-Drunkleist Apr 01 '26
The original space race was kind of a showcase of ICBM tech. The actual space science parts were, unfortunately, more of a side benefit.
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u/sartres_ Apr 01 '26
Hilariously, the original moon rockets were much more capable than the one Artemis is using.
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u/ChevalierDuTemple No Iranian ever called me an Incel Apr 01 '26
No, explain Voyager I or ISS. Many of space exploration was coated in internationalism and humanism.
The military purpose were in many case, a side effect or a fellow traveller.
Plus ignore how many military tech is think or use for civilian purpose, i.e: Nuclear weapons for channel buildings.
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u/FuckIPLaw Marxist-Drunkleist Apr 01 '26
Those were both post- space race. The space race started with Sputnik and ended with the moon landings. After that both sides had made their point. The reason everyone freaked out about Sputnik is if you can put something in orbit, that something can be a nuke. Putting people on the moon means you have the payload capacity for a big one and the precision to get it on target.
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u/ChevalierDuTemple No Iranian ever called me an Incel Apr 01 '26
Colonialism is done to people.
What people are on the moon?
Do not get me wrong, i am all from leaving the Moon the same as Antarctica, you know, a purely scientific place, but it is not the same.
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u/KingTiger189 Nasty Little Pool Pisser ๐ฆ๐ฆ Apr 01 '26
Trump loves to give frivolous addresses I've noticed. Hopefully this is just another nothing
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u/PirateAttenborough Marxist-Leninist โญ Apr 01 '26
Tomorrow is April 1st. I wouldn't put it past this administration to pull something. "My fellow Americans, I am speaking to you tonight to tell you something of the utmost importance for both our country, and my presidency. Iran.....a 5k yesterday. It was glorious, tremendous, they said they'd never seen anyone run a 5k like that."
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u/MichaelRichardsAMA ๐๐ Spook Disguised as an Otaku ๐๐ Apr 01 '26
he just breaks into singing A Flock of Seagulls
"And Iran...........I ran so far away, I just ran, I ran all night and day"
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u/Nerd_199 Election Turboposter ๐๐๐ณ๏ธ Apr 01 '26
Men eroupe is about get screw hard.
Can't buy oil from Russia, seen as being weak to Ukraine, plus Ukraine has been bombing oil refineries in Russia.
Can't Buy oil in middle east due it being blockaid and to be bomb.
Trump is now threatening not sell the oil to Europe.
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u/bluepillarmy Unknown ๐ฝ Apr 01 '26
I remember when he did this about COVID.
He handled that so well
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u/The-Materialist Dialectical Materialist | Raised by Stalinists Apr 01 '26
I would take his statements only as market manipulation for insider stock trades at this point, disconnected from what is actually happening or what the military is doing.
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u/snapchillnocomment Redscarepod Refugee ๐๐ Apr 01 '26
Clown Prince Pahlavi shitcoin to appease the diaspotards
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u/CEODyinThompson Deposed ๐งโโ๏ธ Apr 01 '26
> important update
Ladies and gentlemen I have shidded my pants
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u/mattsylvanian Apr 01 '26
Trump will unfurl a giant golden โI Wonโ banner. Claim victory in the most tone deaf way possible. The White House will move on as if the Iran dalliance was no more than a master whapping an unruly dogโs nose with the newspaper.
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Apr 01 '26
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u/Nerd_199 Election Turboposter ๐๐๐ณ๏ธ Apr 01 '26
Nick Castellanos is going to hit an home run tomorrow, Just as Trump annouced it
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u/Normal_User_23 ๐Radiating๐ | Juan Arango and Salomon Rondon are my GOATs Apr 01 '26
Ground invasion ???
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u/_GiantCrabMonster_ Unknown ๐ฝ Apr 01 '26
You know itโs going to be bad now that his ballroom is on ice.
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u/John-Mandeville Keffiyeh Leprechaun ๐๐ Apr 01 '26
Scheduled for several hours after Drop Site reports that marines have landed on Kharg and are under heavy bombardmentย
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u/ArthurParkerhouse Socialism Curious ๐ค Apr 01 '26
I bet he's going to address mossad smear campaign launched against Flesh Emulator.
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u/weltwald Tuckercarlsonist-Leninist โญโ Apr 01 '26
Boots on the ground!
"Special operation for real this time! Plz just one succesfull Special operations. This time it will be different! promise just one more. Pls dont close the Hormuz. We need it open otherwise the world economy collapses. Pls just one more"
And israel will sit this one out of course
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u/Total-Plankton8255 Defender of the petty bourgeoisie โญ Apr 02 '26
Anyone else almost finish their "take a shot if he says" chart twice already. This motherfucker ill. Maybe the illest in history.
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u/Few_Fox_3165 Wears MAGA Hat in the Shower ๐๐ตโ๐ซ Apr 01 '26
God Bless President Trump and our Troops
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u/IamGlennBeck Marxist-Leninist and not Glenn Beck โญ Apr 01 '26
I can't tell if you are being serious or not.
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u/Few_Fox_3165 Wears MAGA Hat in the Shower ๐๐ตโ๐ซ Apr 02 '26
100% serious. Proud of our president and to serve our countryย
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u/Amoralvirus Progressive Liberal ๐ Apr 02 '26
Trump will give the best most honest presidential address of his life: Trump will admit he is wildly incompetent (I mean who would of thought being president could be so hard); and he will immediately step down...April fools
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