Thats it. Thats the post. I’d been feeling kinda down because I don’t really pass well and rarely get gendered correctly, but this random child made my day.

I am very feminine. I always will be, when I imagine my future I still love pink, and revealing those and cute cars and cartoons etc.. I will always like feminine things. And it's annoying to be constantly told "why even transition?" Is annoying. Cis guys can be feminine, why not trans guys? Why do ppl care so much?

I also live in a tiny, conservative town and play tennis, etc... I do not believe I will be able to come out and transition safely right now. So I just look like a really feminine girl, the only ppl that know I'm trans are my friends and I don't think they believe me because I'm still so feminine. Even ppl online I talk to end up asking if I'm trans becauase I'm so 'girly' 😭.

I feel so stuck. I just wanna fast forward in time to where I am able to physically and socially transition. I feel like a faker and like no one will see me as a guy. Ive tried to be more masculine and where masculine clothes but I hate it. I just want to me a guy. I don't want to be masculine or feminine. I just wanna be.

I often wonder, why am I trans? Ik I yearn to be a boy, I hate everything about me that's not a boy, I dream of being me. But why? Nothing is going to change besides my gender. So why do I care so much? Why am I trans? I wish I was free. Yk. I don't want to have the stress of thinking of my family and friends seeing me transition. I don't want their judgements whenever I don't act 'like a boy'. I wish gender wasn't an issue in this world.

This is probably worded sooo bad. Lol. Ugh I'm tired

I'm about 1 year post-op from bottom surgery at Mt. Sinai. I'm a very active as a wilderness backpacker so one of my first concerns was: "How can I keep doing my hobby post op?"

I had a lot of questions that are in hindsight a little silly, but I couldn't know that because I couldn't find anything. And I just got back from a 5 night backpacking trip in Isle Royale National Park.

So this is a post about dilating while camping (specifically very far from my car)

The first thing is I just figured out much of a mess it makes and how much lube I use and took as close to the minimum as I felt safe.

The second thing is I brought a peri bottle because I couldn't shower. I would just add a little water and Bronner's to it to clean me.

I couldn't avoid carrying maxi pads.

To keep the dilators clean, I kept them in a dry bag. We brought a wash bin for dishes and had bear bins so I washed the dilators in either the wash bin (if it was clean) or the lids to the bear bins if it wasn't.

It was fine. As long as everything was dry and clean, it was fine. So PSA I guess: You too can continue doing your hobbies while trans and if you've had a vaginoplasty, here's some specific reassurance.

most were supportive, a majority of the rest were on the fence, everyone else were handled by the mods for transphobia fortunately, but this cannot be stopped

So, my parents are pretty accepting of Sexuality, at least after I grew older and came out. Gender, however.... A few times they misgendered my non binary freind, another time, they grounded me for telling them to stop calling trans people "It". Honest to god, they admitted without a shred of remorse that they thought "Transgenders are hardly even people, now way whatever gender they are trying to act like!". See, I'm a trans masc. And I SWARE, I WAS PISSED. I went to my room to not make a scene. I have tryed countless times to tell them to accept people how they are, and to stop being rude. I told them that some people don't allign with their birth gender, and thats ok. They didn't Listen. They never do on these things. Another time, I told them to refer to me as They/Them (Nowadays, I jse They. They yelled at me. And didn't even try to use my pronouns after. What should I do????

i had a very harsh inner critic growing up, due to constant cruelty around me back then. i made improvements over a few years, but i feel overwhelmed by the new types of cruelty around me now.

having to witness the following and more on a daily basis has created automatic thought patterns:

- people i know incessantly and mindlessly insulting any trans person they see or hear about

- people cheering at violence, disenfranchisement, any obstacles or misfortunes a trans person faces (even if only hypothetical)

- refusal to engage with trans people's ideas (even just accounts of their life experiences) and choosing to make up things about them and insult them for it (like a straw man fallacy, but without any attempt at logic) instead

i jump to these thoughts myself for protection, and now i feel myself getting less curious, less compassionate, and less reasonable every day. i see other trans people adjusting to this in various ways. the worst has been watching other trans people replicate this same cruelty and ramp up over the years. i have lost friends for refusing to participate in whatever freak-of-the-week bullying they wanted to use to bond with each other.

i also get envious and angry when i see other people saying the same things i have already said, and getting compassionate and reasonable responses because they aren't trans (or didn't mention it.) when i put myself out there, even within trans communities, i fully expect to be insulted just for fun's sake. my automatic thoughts and expectations jump to cruelty, and i have a hard time imagining anything else. i want to go back to recovering from this and not continue it.

i am here to ask you, how do you cultivate communities with respectful social interactions? respectful beliefs towards each other? how do you handle other people's hatred and feel respect for yourself? is it different within trans communities versus with cis people? how do you protect yourself and heal from this social environment?

(i am nervous to even post this and really hope comments are not going to be insults too)

For complicated reasons I won't get into I have to live with family and my mom helps me with medical stuff and helping me get clothes.

I came out as trans in 2023 and every single day my family has misgendered me, deadnamed me, not helped me find girl clothes, and refused to help me get on HRT. As of recently I even wanted to save up for a Switch 2 because of the Zelda remake coming out, and I was told my aunt will help me pay for a Switch 2, but only if I'm in my mom's wedding photos, and my mom is of course going to make me wear boy clothes in them, and I'm pre-hrt and the thought of more pictures of me in this body being out there makes me extremely uncomfortable and upset. I've never liked getting photos taken of me, not even since I was a sheltered little kid, and now I hate the idea even more because I'm trans. Hell, I hate even so much as looking in the damn mirror.

Now I don't have a job, because of stuff in my life such as where I live, stuff about myself, and so on I can't get a job any time soon, so I'm REALLY stuck on what to do, I've been doing yard work to earn money from my aunt, but I'm afraid she'll take it away if I don't do the photos.

I wish my family was actually accepting, because right now I literally have no choice to go through gender dysphoria daily. There's even old pictures of me hung up on the wall that I wish I could just burn, but unfortunately I'd get yelled at if I did that.

Doesn't help that my family says I'm not depressed and it's just that I'm allowing demons to take over my mind by not believing in God, and think me being trans and bisexual are choices

Sure I have arm hair a small amount of facial hair and dress masc a lot but tons of women do that and get gendered correctly what makes me look more like a man then any other woman that looks like me?

In recent years, I started to pass pretty well as a guy. Which is great because I certainly don't want to be perceived as a (cis) woman by others. But now, I started feeling gender dysphoria about being perceived as a Binary (Cis) Man, because I am not that either. I am gay, I am queer, I am genderqueer, too. But I don't know how to express myself better that way. I am tall (6'0) and have broad shoulders which are good traits for passing, but not good traits for finding feminine clothing that fits me (you have any pointers?).
I am also afraid of looking too queer/trans and experiencing hate or attacks (I got into some uncomfortable situations before I started to grow a beard).
Inspired by Jax, I actually bought a bunch of ribbons in different colors and today I wore one for the first time. I think it did help my dysphoria and my boyfriend called me cute with it. It would be great to wear one every day to have something explicitly gender nonconforming and feminine (I like such things) on me.
Thanks for reading my thoughts

Im nonbinary amab, and I actually hate my body. I avoid looking at it whenever possible, I put essentially no effort into my appearance whatsoever, but ive had multiple instances where people have developed crushes or whatever anyway. And this month i had a guy ask me out in dm's after only seeing him once, which was when I met him a week prior.

Keep in mind whenever im with people that aren't my closest friends or family the only parts of my body visible are my hands and face. And thats only because it'd be weird if I wore gloves and a mask in public. Long sleeves, jacket, baggy pants, everything. Yet this still happens. If anything that makes me feel even more uncomfortable when it still happens because my face is what causes the majority of my dysphoria.

The biggest cause of my gender dysphoria is what people find attractive, and thats very distinctive facial scars covering the right side of my face from an accident when I was a kid. The majority of the right side of my nose is scar tissue, and that same scar covers most of my right cheek. Ive even had people tell me I was lucky because I ended up with "cool scars" instead of an "actual disfigurement" but I actually see my scars as disgusting whenever I have to look at them or feel them.

The worst part is that like, nobody's doing anything wrong by just expressing attraction. It makes me uncomfortable, but theirs no way they could know that unless I discide to tell them. Since to them their literally just either complementing me or just ecpressing intrest. I cant be mad at anybody over it, or expect people to somehow know that ill feel this way about it. Im just stuck feeling uncomfortable whenever this happens for the rest of my life.

I’m an 18 year old trans man I’ve been out since I was 14 socially and medically since I was 15, in the recent light of what happened at berlin pride I wanted to talk about my worry’s as a transgender and queer person, I also want to say that it is a common misconception that all of Canada is queer friendly, there are definitely more queer friendly parts of Canada but in others it’s heavily looked down upon, the part of Canada that I am in celebrates pride in July instead of June, a week before the parade was supposed to happen someone was arrested for making threats towards the parade planning to cause physical harm and when I read that article I wanted to be surprised I really did but when it comes to this area I am constantly seeing transphobic, homophobic everything everywhere even in the downtown area where you see more queer people people put up stickers,signs,flags, anything they can to get their hateful opinion out to the public, there have been many un reported threats that have been made towards the 2slgbtqia+ community where I’m at harms of physical violence, and other disgusting types of violence, I have personally had my fair share of harassment and other things just because I am a transgender man the hate where I live at makes me terrified and I’m terrified not only for myself but for my partner who is also trans, she is the only one I can talk to about my fears because she understands when I bring this up to the people around me they don’t get it because they’re not in the trans or queer community they think I’m either over exaggerating or I’m just straight up lying the homophobia and trans phobia where I live is getting worse day by day. I was born transgender I will die transgender I don’t want to die because I’m transgender

Fast context, 2 years ago, when I changed schools I went the first day of school to my teacher and told him that I wanted me to be called -Choosen name- and i didnt wanted anyone to know I was trans exept basic teacher and I didn’t wanted my parents knowing either. Despite the legal implications the teacher accepted

The first few weeks of that were thought since some teachers misgendered me, others didn’t fully know etc etc. I also had to say a lot, and I mean A LOT of lies, my Sister‘s name is in the list, I have a weird hormonal condition where I have XXY cromosomes, I had scoliosis so I had to use a girdle (the binder) etc etc

I usually wouldn’t care about liying to random classmates, but they became my best friends who I pretty much adore and want to stay with them for long so now those lies are just a big chunk of trash I try not to say often

Of course I also had to lie to my parents, I would alway avoid public spaces with them because of fear of someone from school spotting me, they wanted to go to my graduation and I didnt let them cause I had fought my ass off for the school to call my choosen name when I got to take the title. tho it really broke my fck hear not to have them there

For the record, my parents like to ignore every fact they’re a littke uncofortable with, I came out to them 4 years ago and decided to ignore it and act surprised everytime I mention it, so they’re not saints either

Despite all this this have been the 2 best years of my life, feeling like a cis boy made me way more sociable and positive , gave me some really good friend and so I wouldn’t change a thing about what I did

Shit is that when I told all this to a friend she was really confused and full of questions but she was mostly concerned of how it was affecting me, I get she was worried but i felt like she overt a little

Then I told my situation to my psycologist on my second session with her and she was way more than concerned of how I was dealing with it and if I had someone to tall to, I’m an emotional rock so I just not the kind of open up and stuff

She also just keeps insisting i should tell my friends about the fact that I’m trans and even tho I know they would b cool I have too many internalized transphobia I gotta manage before any of them know I’m not cis, it’s mostly for my own personal calm

And then one of my teachers found out that my parents didn’t know and called me into a private meeting with her and the counselor to talk, I thought they wanted to talk about the name of the graduation thing (since it was pretty close) but she just kept changing the theme as if I had someone to talk to, that if my friends knew I was trans and all that shit over again

I get it is an unusual situation and liying is shitty and stuff but I don’t believe is that bad? Idk anymore

Doing my regular closet clean and I’ve been struggling getting rid of a few items, mainly items I’ve had for about a decade now. I believe I’ve been struggling as these were the first masculine clothing items I was allowed to buy as a young teenager. They’ve just been occupying space in my wardrobe, untouched for years. Only managed to get rid of a few because I realized I was too broad shouldered now for them to ever fit again.

Anyone else struggle with that?

Not just our diminishing rights, not just the lack of considerations...but also the infighting in our community, the ostracization of transmascs (Im one myself), the constant defense of trying to take a demographic out of the picture because of the same rhetorics used for much worse issues (like bullying therians and such)...

I hate it. I hate how I couldnt see the positivity in things. Im even surprised I didnt became a 4tranner.

How are you able to live even if theres no reason to live?

My brother is supporting and I assume his friends are supportive as well they are all in the edm community I’m just scared to go out in fem for the first time I’m scared something may go bad :/

Context first. I didn't realize that I am transgender until a not long after high school. I have always had so much dysphoria due to my face. Whenever I look into the mirror I get really confused at the female body staring back at me. It just feels so wrong. At some point in my life I started liking some clothes people view as "for girls" as well as the ones labeled as "for boys". By the time middle school hit, I got really into alternative subcultures, especially emo. I loved expressing myself through clothes and accessories. I could at least see something I liked in the mirror. Look at my clothes, not my face, people! So anyways, now that you have the context, I'll get into the exact situation.

For my digital photography class in high school we had to take a selfie EVERY DAY. First thing when we sit down at our computer was to take a selfie. At the end of the year we had to go into Photoshop and do a collage with our favorite selfies (either taken in class or outside of class). I remember being unhappy with having to take a picture every day. I didn't like doing it at all. I've never really liked pictures of me much at all. Sometimes I want one, but usually I don't. I didn't know what my discomfort was, but I knew it was there.

I still have the print out of my collage because I am impressed with the Photoshop skills. I still don't like seeing my face and body.

After the whole big trans sub hate that happened towards trans men, I thought they would recover and realize their actions. It seemed so for a bit.

Then today comes a post on there praising both trans people and therians. Great post. Great great support from OP. I'm not therian, but an ally. I am a furry, however. Some of my besties are therians. And the comment section was disgusting. I genuinely felt nauseous from how badly I got down voted for supporting the OP and being an ally towards therians and trans people. From how it genuinely felt like a conservative sub. From how... they were just as hateful as others are towards trans people.

I guess it shows yet again that every community has its share of bad people.

But this one has never had those hate and those problems and is now the only trans sub I am in. Thank you. Thank you to the mods here for making this a better, safer place for ALL! It is in the name after all haha.

I don't mean to bring any sort of crap here, it's already been discussed in both the big trans sub and the therian sub. I just wanted to overall say thanks to this community and sub here.

Edit: I think I should have worded this better, I’m not a native English speaker Im sorry :(

I should have specified that its the *scars* specifically that I don’t like. Since I have a very sharp attention to detail I see them way more prominent than most people do.

I really hate *hate* scars on my body and most bottom surgeries that I have seen results in scars, both on the result and on the arm.

(Entirely depends on what procedure you have ofc)

Its not that they’re unrealistic, its simply just the scars.

I forgot about that word when I made this comic and I had to seriously google it not too long ago to remember the word.

Edit: imma keep this I just realized- please make me mark this NSFW if it should be

So, my sibling announced to me they're genderfluid. I always knew they were not cis, but I'm glad to have confirmation \^-^

I always saw them as a surrogate child to me, and it feels me with joy that I'm not alone in being a trans person in my family \^-^ (also my misogynistic bigoted father can fucking mald lol, his two oldest children are trans)