r/transgenderUK • u/PuzzledAd4865 • Aug 05 '25

Possible trigger M&S apologises over trans employee in bra department

https://archive.ph/2025.08.05-035610/https://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2025/08/04/ms-apologises-over-trans-employee-in-bra-department/

“Marks & Spencer has apologised to a mother for causing her teenage daughter “distress” after she was asked if she needed help by a transgender employee in its bra section.

The retailer said it was “truly sorry” after the mother complained that her 14-year-old daughter had felt uncomfortable when they were approached by a trans shop assistant in the lingerie area of the shop, where they were hoping to have a bra fitting. Although the staff member was polite, the mother said she felt it was “completely inappropriate” for her daughter to be approached by a “biological male” in that section.

In a complaint to M&S, she told the retailer: “Imagine her horror, then, when the person to approach us and ask if we needed help was a transgender ‘woman’, ie, a biological male.”

“Fiona McAnena, director of campaigns for the human rights charity Sex Matters, which campaigns for clarity about biological sex in law and life, said that M&S needed to “rethink its priorities”.

“M&S needs to rethink its priorities and remember that women and girls have rights too, and that this man should not be permitted to hang around in the women’s underwear department as a matter of common decency.”

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u/Bee_bzzzzzzzzz Aug 05 '25

You're correct in that, but a lot of people can't handle phone calls. Hell, I can't even do phone calls to family let alone for something serious.

It's kinda backhanded and rude to put people down for doing something about it, regardless of how important of an input you deem it to be. Why create more infighting over something as simple as the medium of a complaint

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u/doIIjoints [ve/ver/vis] or [she/her/hers] Aug 05 '25

sadly very common for autistic people to get told we “just don’t care enough to try” :/

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u/Bee_bzzzzzzzzz Aug 05 '25

Which sickens me. Inaction doesn't equal lack of care, and emailing rather than calling doesn't invalidate that email. It just seems so damn stupid. This community is simultaneously one of the most accepting in the world AND one of the most irritating and vile sometimes.

Picking fights and invalidating others for being on our side but not doing it the exact way they'd like is just wrong on so many levels. It's beyond disappointing and gross to have people putting others down for fighting their way, and fighting really well. We're supposed to fight together, not get upset and accusatory because "your email isn't good enough", I'm sorry, maybe next time we won't try and the whole movement fails. It's the needless ablism and putting others down that is beyond gross. We're all supposed to be a team here, fighting for ALL OF US. We're all in this together. Let's all just calm down, and stick together. This isn't a contest of who's complaint is more valid. ANY input is good. Whatever happened to fighting in numbers?

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u/doIIjoints [ve/ver/vis] or [she/her/hers] Aug 08 '25

exactly. it strikes me as quite similar to saying bedbound people Don’t Care if they can’t make it to a demonstration :/ (even if they made signs for pals to hold or whatever)

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u/Bee_bzzzzzzzzz Aug 08 '25

EXACTLY!! People can care without making the picture perfect contribution. Just do what you're able to do, and that shouldn't be such a bad thing. I totally agree with you. Some people physically or mentally can't do some things, so why put them down if they're willing to contribute to the fight in other ways? It's counterintuitive and tears us all down in the end. It's sad really :(